by Munchin'Mark ©
Just another grey day in the big city. The Friends gang is sitting in the girls' spacious apartment. Ross lounges on a couch, Phoebe sits demurely opposite him. Rachael has flopped down next to Phoebe. Monica is rushing around doing nothing in a very busy way, as usual, and Chandler hovers behind Ross' couch, waiting for an opportunity to wisecrack. No sign of Joey, but don't worry, he'll get here.
Sure enough Joey bursts through the door with a grin on his face wide enough to show past those huge coffee cups down at Central Perk. "Great news!" he ejaculates.
"I've inherited million dollars from my uncle, but I have to spend a million in a week to get it?" It's not one of Chandler's best. No-one laughs, but no-one ever laughs.
"No," continues Joey, "I've just been to see my agent, I've been offered a spin-off from 'Days of Our Lives,' I'm gonna be playing Dr. Drake Ramorez again!"
"Well done Joey," says Rachel.
"What's it called?" Phoebe pipes up.
"'Family Practice,' it's where Dr. Drake Ramorez leaves the hospital to work with his family," Joey explains.
"Didn't they kill him off?" enquires Monica, whilst cleaning a dish.
"Ah, there's a clever twist..." Joey's stuck.
"What's the clever twist, Joey?" Chandler twists it in.
"Er, I'll have to get back to you on that one," Joey concedes, "But they start filming the pilot tomorrow."
Next day in his office building, Chandler is in the canteen when he notices that several people are reading his mother's latest steamy novel- Familiar. He tries to keep his head down, this could be embarrassing. "Hey Chandler!"
"How does your mom come up with this stuff?"
"I don't know! I spent my childhood with my head under a pillow."
"No, really my pillow, singular, and on my own." And that's perfectly true, but when you're alone your thoughts can wander...
It's some time later, and it's a filming studio. People are carrying big items of scenery around. Joey is dressed as a doctor, white coat and everything. He is standing next to a bed in which a woman is lying, looking up at him. "Drake!" she says, "I want to thank you for saving my life!"
Joey smiles a benevolent smile and replies, "that's alright, anything for my sister. Now make sure you take your medicine."
"Aaand cut!" shouts the director. "Great! That was great, Joey. Good work, that's the last of your scenes, see ya at the end of production party."
Chandler is on the subway. For him this is hell. All over the place there are huge pictures of his mom in a cleavage revealing blouse, with the legend, "Get hot, get sexy, get Familiar." That's not the kind of picture a son should have to put up with folks staring at. Chandler's only happy that no-one knows that he's her son.
Central Perk, coffee shop and extra lounge. Rachael isn't working yet, but bald-headed Gunther is. He's cleaning coffee cups and dreaming of his favourite waitress, Rachael. And it certainly isn't her serving skills that he likes abouut her.
Ross and Chandler are in their customary positions, Chandler on the big sofa and Ross in a soft chair to his right. Those coffee cups are huge.
"Alright," says Ross, between sips of coffee, "any better ideas on how I can get back with Rachael." Even as he says her name a dreamy look comes over his face. Chandler looks thoughtful, "we've tried wooing, the radio, amusing lists of qualities. Let's be more direct." Ross leans over, "go on."
At the same time Monica and Rachael are having a little argument in their flat. "My room is just too small," moans Rachael. "Well?" responds Monica, "what of it?" "How come you have the bigger room?" Rachael is demanding. Monica looks affronted, "This was my flat first, that's why." "I've got more stuff than you. And I pay the same rent on this place." "You would have more stuff. But how much of it did you pay for yourself?" "Hah! Please let me have your room!" "I like the room I have." "Let's swap for one night, and see, yeah?" "OK."
Chandler is whispering to Ross. "We'll do a raid, like in college." "I didn't go to college with you." "You still know the form, we creep into their rooms and fuck them." "Are you telling me about your plans for my own sister?" "Yeah." "I'm not sure that I can take it." "I'm not asking you to take it, you'll be too busy giving it to Rachael. Shutupshutupshutup! Here they come." Monica sits down on the sofa and Rachel walks over, tying her pinafore. "Hi guys, want anything?" Before Ross can put his foot in it, Chandler points to his cup and says, "Can we have another gallon of coffee?"
Joey walks through the door. "Hey guys, I got the preview tape." He waves the tape at them. "Great, we'll watch it later."
Over in the corner Phoebe shifts her guitar and taps the microphone. "OK. This is a happy song about what a bitch my identical twin sister is, and why you shouldn't take it out on me." She coughs and strikes a chord. Or something like a chord.
PING. A string on the guitar goes, the audience breathes. "No, it's OK." Phoebe tells them, "That string doesn't change the sound anyway."
The eye of the observer travels to the boys' flat, which is smaller than the girls' flat, and the ear of the observer is happy to tag along. The gang is here too. Joey puts the tape into the VCR and joins the others.
There is Dr. Ramorez, next to his sister's bed. "Drake, I want to thank you for saving my life." Ramirez smiles, "that's alright, anything for my sister." The shot changes and the screen show Ramorez from behind, stripping. The look on the woman's face is one of feigned lust. Now the naked doctor is pounding his sick sister, plenty of close ups, but not on the doctor's face.
As one, the gang tilt their heads to the right, trying to make out the scene. Joey is amazed. "I don't remember doing that." "Really?" says Chandler his eyes glued to the screen, "I'd sure remember doing that, and I will never forget that either."
The man pulls out and come around to the woman's face. The camera shows the doctor's face, it is Joey. "Take your medicine," he says. And the gang gets treated to a facial shot. Drake's sister swallows his cum and smiles for the camera.
"So tell me, Dr. Ramorez," began Chandler, "Which medical institute came up with that treatment?"
Joey is upset. "I didn't film that!" Everyone looks surprised, is this a new side to Joey? " I mean I wouldn't have charged them extra." No it isn't.
That night, in the girls' apartment, Ross and Chandler put their plan in action.
In the dark, Ross fondles a naked woman, she wakes up, but responds to the rampant dick by spreading her legs.
Next door, Rachael is woken up by a voice by her ear. "Hey! Mon! It's a raid!"
"Chandler what are you doing?"
"Hell, I'm going next door to watch the event of a lifetime."
Ross is really happy. It's a tight pussy and its horny owner that're doing it, he doesn't notice the door open a tiny bit, or Chandler and Rachael peeping in, wide-eyed.
Monica is happy too, she woke up horny after dreaming that she was Dr. Ramorez's sister, and found a stiff cock waiting. And it really feels good in there. She's about to come, so she hasn't noticed anything either.
Rachael and Chandler have a great view. The siblings are silhouetted against the moonlight, naked bodies writhing together, brother and sister, joined at the hip. Not very surreptitiously, Chandler strokes his hard dick against Rachael's ass. She slaps it back, "Watch it."
Ross and Monica freeze. "What was that?" whispers Ross. "Ross?" "Monica?"
Monica's shoulders drop in resignation, "What the hell, keep going."
"With my sister?"
"KEEP GOING, I was about to come." To get the action back, Monica bucks her hips. Ross starts again, but he's different. His cock is harder than ever and he's fucking her more urgently. Monica does her best to keep quiet as an intense orgasm comes sweeping over her, but her squeaks tell everyone the story. Ross is really fucking her hard, he forces his dick as far up her as he can get and says, "take your medicine!" And then pumps his gametes into his sister's arching body. Monica chuckles, "Thank you Dr. Gellar."
The next day, they all know. The gang is sitting in the girls' flat. Monica is sitting on Ross' knee. Chandler recounts, "You two are fucking, Joey is on film fucking his on-screen sister, and I fantasise about my own mom?"
Joey scoffs, "That, all? Well I've..."
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