An infinite sweetness

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An angel need not smile to pierce a heart:
She leans back fearfully to touch a wall
And finds it bullet-ridden; so the start
Of strain shows; later on, might he recall...
That thin, pale face; the fixed red lips that pursed;
The fingers clutching at the stone behind;
The shoulders hunched, as if to fear the worst?
Or would he make demands - the vicious kind,
As tears trickle from dark-rimmed eyes; her dress
Is shapeless round her shins – a woman's lot
In conflict zones - when saying "no" or "yes"
Makes little difference; though, when she's shot
Him with the gun behind her, he'll 'depart':
An angel need not smile to pierce a heart...

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SweetOblivionSweetOblivionover 7 years agoAuthor
thank you

I thought the context possibly erotic rather than the verse itself - the picture from a Russian friend that led to this verse was truly inspirational - I hope I have captured its effect here. I fear the end in the picture as not quite as I would have hoped in my revision of the tale - she looked so vulnerable - sad smile.

greenmountaineergreenmountaineerover 7 years ago

Very dramatic, S.O. Remarkable opening and closing; in between, a very imaginative narrattive.

".....when she's shot/Him.." is very skillful enjambment and heightens the drama even moreso.

I must admit I'm confused as to why it's listed as an erotic poem.

I'm recommending it in PF&D.

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