Come walk awhile (a villanelle)

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158 words
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Come, take my hand and walk awhile with me!
I'll share the day with no one else in mind
our selfishness the gift we give for free.
You'll snuggle close as we walk towards the sea.
I'll cherish all the keepsakes that we find.
Come, take my hand and walk awhile with me.
Your shouted laugh imprints my memory
and racing fast the sunlight makes us blind!
Our selfishness the gift we give for free;
my joy in you explodes in raucous glee
when seagulls scream at us though not unkind!
Come, take my hand and walk awhile with me
as night descends we'll gather from the trees
the firelight that lets the day unwind,
our selfishness the gift we give for free.
The time we share is limited, you see.
We will not waste a glance at whats behind.
Come, take my hand and walk awhile with me
our selfishness the gift we give for free.

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  • COMMENTS
9 Comments
LeBrozLeBrozalmost 17 years ago
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This poem was mentioned in the Archival Review thread, in a picking through Lit's archive of over 35,000 poems.

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LeBrozLeBrozabout 17 years ago
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I find I must agree with foehn's comment; it's right up there with Dylan Thomas' famous villanelle. But where is it written that strophe breaks must follow traditional form? As for the word I'm looking for ~~ perfection!

foehnfoehnabout 19 years ago
Is the villanelle flu going around?

I need to read Spike's, but yours (in my opinion) betters Dylan Thomas' famous one.

For some idiotic reason, I missed the traditional stanza breaks; but they do camouflage (sp?) the repeating lines... which maybe is a good thing? Hmmmm.

As ever, you make me think and feel.

monalisa2monalisa2about 19 years ago
very descriptive

i really enjoyed reading this, very descriptive, and yet deep at the same time.

My Erotic TaleMy Erotic Taleabout 19 years ago
villanelle

all the villanelles coming in rows

I learned what they are <grin> but this

was the instruction manuel, very very good.

'come walk awhile'

was mood setting and enchanting

excellent poetry~

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