Final message

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80 words
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sack
sack
144 Followers

Don't scream
it is only a twist
a gentle scraping
of your soul

The knife goes deeper
yet there is no pain
feelings dead
numbed unsaid

No words spoken
nothing broken
only a heart
beating off the hook

Is anyone there?
Does anyone care?
Don't scream
We'll meet in dreams

It is only a twist
and won't hurt a bit
The knife goes deeper
leaving a message

There is no beep
nothing to rewind
only our souls
forever intertwined

sack
sack
144 Followers
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  • COMMENTS
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8 Comments
LeBrozLeBrozabout 16 years ago
~~

This poem was mentioned in the Archival Review thread, in a picking through Lit's archive of over 39,000 poems.

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duddle146duddle146over 17 years ago
Terror!

Death by loneliness ~ sinking deeper ~ feelings dead numbness sets in. Perhaps - we'll meet in a dream.

dcpoet44dcpoet44over 18 years ago
a familiar flow.....

and i can feel it as if i'm reading it on stage. i dig this bit:

It is only a twist

and won't hurt a bit

The knife goes deeper

leaving a message

***

the message is indeed final in this one.....don

moonblademmoonblademabout 19 years ago
...

This dark poetry kept me glued to the screen. I love your simple yet effective delivery. Well done, Sack!

sandspikesandspikeabout 19 years ago
Cool

This is next door to getting it done. I didn't like the

4th verse, but loved the rest. It moves like the message.

I thought it was a great use of rhyme and most verses had

a killer line to back it up. Tell me, did you write this

quickly? It flows so well I'd say you kept the same train

of thought the whole time.

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