I Lost My Penis

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sensanin
sensanin
532 Followers

*Everyone is over 18*

Disclaimer: This poem deals with issues of gender, societal notions of manhood/womanhood, and transgender issues of identity. Please be respectful of individuals' gender identity if you comment.
--

Mother thrust me from her womb with ten fingers,
two eyes and one penis, which my stomach
rolled over on, hiding. I lost it
to a man with no penis who wanted
one enough to bet his vagina on,
promising it would be mine if I won. I
asked for his breasts, too, and he demanded
my testicles. I didn't have the heart to tell him
they weren't more than leaking flesh and cum-
bersome weights smashing into the bike that held
my baseball bat, soccer ball, boxing gloves
(only dusted by the breeze as I rode and women who
traded for them with cosmetics). Never breasts
or vagina; those I never had and
wanted to try. We played a game of numbers,
not of chance but of words that trumped and
spilled over each other in a torrent of
digits larger than the one before until
I stumbled, tripping on a D—into Ds—on
a step forward he caught me in his ten fingers,
staring at me with two eyes and one penis.

sensanin
sensanin
532 Followers
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wakingDownwakingDownover 8 years ago

Outstanding. A flurry of emotions and desires, of need and the way the world often denies it. What the world says you are, what your body says you are, and what you know you are. The fact that these can be in opposition of each other is disheartening, to say the absolute least.

If I could, I would press a button and make the planet realize that not everyone is born with a physical gender that matches their mental gender (or is it sex? I can never remember which term is correct for which context. I don't mean to offend, I just tend to bungle them. I'm sorry if I did so here), and that as soon as that realization set in, that they all accepted it as something that not only happens, but is okay. That it is simply something that each person has to address in their life if they fall into that category, like those that are born with other mistaken parts of their bodies that need to be addressed.

A missing toe or a birthmark that is disruptive to a normal life, something like that. Not something that is necessarily negative, or something that is the person's fault, nothing like that, but just something that needs to be addressed so that they can get on with being a happy, complete, everyday person.

Of course, there will also be those that *don't* want to have that change. That want to keep their bodies the way they are, and simply live as the gender they know that they are regardless. And that's perfectly fine too. I don't see why anyone would fault someone for wanting to keep their body the way it is, the same way I don't see why anyone would fault someone for wanting to change their body to match what they feel.

After all, each person lives in their own body, and that body, whatever parts it may be comprised of, has no effect whatsoever on anyone else. If I ever find that button, I'll gladly press the hell out of it.

This poem makes me feel like, while there is more progress being made towards that button not being needed, there is still a long road ahead. Great job with it.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
more -excellent

please continue with clarification