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Click hereSo many don't see the me I know
The me inside that once was
Just an unpleasant yet courteous
Neighbor is all they ever see
All I ever show all I let them know
Hidden deep is the monster
The high desert horror inside
Grinning jackal so quick to bite
Heartless and cruel lashing out
Quick with a claw quick with a saw
Now a memory same as so much
Locked away from the open light
But lurking still I think in the dim
In the corners or in the walls
Waiting for lapse to seize a chance
well. Violence tends to imprint on you in a big way and affects everything for a long time
I think we all have to battle our own demons and just pray they don't break out from the barriers we erect. I hope yours lessen with time until they're nothing but a dirty stain that slides away into insignificance
....and redemptive by turns. As Angeline said, very powerful. I so hope your poetry is cathartic for you - it's certainly affective and moving. Five - if you're counting.
and I think the use of "Was" in the title makes the poem more interesting. There's a synergy working between that title and your poem.