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wakingDown
wakingDown
653 Followers

We all stood by, watching
     We frowned cupped our chins
     We made small notes and kept silent
Letting the horror unfold as it would
Not acting even though we should

We all held back, waiting
     We shook our heads slowly
     We sighed softly impatient
Seeing the detritus build fast
Eager to see what would last

We all took part, knowingly
     We accepted our evil
     We played our vile roles
Allowing war to tear us apart
So that misery we could chart

wakingDown
wakingDown
653 Followers
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4 Comments
AngelineAngelineover 10 years ago
This is excellent writing

stately and moving and stark. The last line seems forced to make the rhyme though. I think you can rework the same idea in that line and find a way to make it smoother. But it is a powerful poem.

tazz317tazz317over 10 years ago
FROM WHICH SIDE IS THIS VIEW

or would 2nd guessing be appropriate for a viewers remorse, TK U MLJ LV NV

LesseloovesPeterLesseloovesPeterover 10 years ago
this one...

Not a big fan of it, but I see its point.

todski28todski28over 10 years ago
been a while

as potent as ever. the foreshadowing to the final stanza was weighted beautifully, just enough in each to draw you on. the finishing of each stanza with a rhyming couplet highlighted that for me and set those lines in concrete, you could almost read them as a poem in and of themselves but I prefer the build up into it :-)

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