The Killing Season

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246 words
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madam_noe
madam_noe
1,845 Followers

When you gonna sleep tonight
Can you even close your eyes
If you ever dream
Is me that you see
Or do you believe your own lies

I told you her heart would break
Some risks are too great to take
But you pushed on
Mow the feeling is gone
And I'm left liiving day to day

The games that you play
the things that you say
Dancing on the knife edge of reason
What you hide and don't show
Secrets we know
Are fading in the killing season

I held her hand as she cried
And watched your love slowly die''
Now the pain won't go
And I'm sure that you know
That I'm still here left behind

I remember being young and free
I still taste her lips soft and sweet
It's such a sorry end
When we break and don't bend
And now it's come down to me

The games that you play
the things that you say
Dancing on the knife edge of reason
What you hide and don't show
Secrets we know
Are fading in the killing season

They found her on that morning gray
when you were gone and oh so gay'
Now tonight is the night
I gave up the fight
No return now I'm slipping away

The games that you play
the things that you say
Dancing on the knife edge of reason
What you hide and don't show
Secrets we know
Are fading in the killing season

madam_noe
madam_noe
1,845 Followers
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  • COMMENTS
4 Comments
twelveoonetwelveooneover 11 years ago
as lyrics

quite nice, you really don't want too much poetry, doesn't work often, still some minor changes in the refrain, often does wonders. another thing, ambiguity, unless you're doin C&W, in which case stick to losin'

your woman

your man

your parkin space for the oversize truck

or pickin' & chosin'

a woman

a man

a bumper sticker for your truck

madam_noemadam_noeover 11 years agoAuthor
TY

As a note: these are lyrics structured poetically. It's adapted slightly from its original form. I wrote in high school for my metal band. Just up here for fun :)

tazz317tazz317over 11 years ago
A DREAM KILLER IS INSENSITIVE

to all others sans self. TK U MLJ LV NV

twelveoonetwelveooneover 11 years ago
5ed

this has a nice external structure, 556,556,56, 6 being refrain, rhyme follows a strict pattern, internally it would have been nicer if word choice were better, and a little trick, change somethings in the last refrain, i.e.

Secrets we knew

Have faded in the killing season

sure my bud Tazz can add to that