A Different Kind of Family Pt. 02

"We are family, Johnny."

I found myself getting misty eyed right then. I wasn't a crier. I hadn't cried once since I found out Katie was sick, and hadn't cried for years before that. But now the emotions were boiling over me.

I had locked away the sheer terror of losing Katie. I was the man of the house, and I'd bottled up my emotions for so long. But now the part of me that was frightened was coming out. I hadn't faced it, only tried to ignore it.

But now, I let myself go.

And so the night passed with Rachel holding my head in her embrace, saying nothing. No words were needed. I could feel the warmth of her love surrounding me. I don't know if I would have been able to endure those many long months if it weren't for her.

***

Things changed in my life after that night. I was still worried about my wife, but there was an extra spring in my step that had gone missing when Katie had taken ill. I had the energy of a normal day, instead of the hollow, weighted-down feeling I'd endured for many months. I'd accepted our lives.

Rachel smiled at me as I came into the kitchen, and I felt my heart lifting up. Automatically, I took her into my arms, dipped her as if in a ballroom dance pose, and kissed her passionately.

When I finally stood her up, she was breathless and glowing. "Wow!"

"Good morning, Rachel." And then I was off to the fields. Spring planting was almost done.

***

When I came back to the house, I first washed my hands and then pecked Rachel on the lips. I headed to my bedroom to check on Katie. She was sleeping peacefully. I paused to wipe the sweat off her face with a clean washcloth and then kissed her forehead tenderly. And then I was back outside.

Rachel and I chatted for an hour after dinner, recapping the day and various humorous events that had occurred with some of the staff. And after one more check on Katie, we retired upstairs to her bedroom.

I was filled with my love for this woman, and it showed in the way I embraced Rachel. This night, I never envisioned I was making love to Katie. This night, there were no frustrations to drive-out of me in a manic fuck. There was only me and Rachel, a woman I loved dearly.

Fully clothed, we found ourselves with limbs entwined and pressed together chest-to-chest. Rachel lay mostly beneath me, my right leg hooked around hers. I reached up with my right hand to brush her bangs out of her eyes while her eyes remained fixed on mine.

"How are you doing?" she asked with sincere concern.

"I'm fine." It wasn't a lie. I really felt fine. I leaned down and pressed my lips to hers.

She welcomed my kiss and returned it full force. Our tongues sparred briefly before we found a comfortable arrangement and then there was nothing to stop us from devouring each other's face.

A few minutes went by, and then I made the first move to undress us. My fingers went to the buttons of her blouse, opening them slowly and one at a time. Her breathing was shallow; her breasts rising and falling as I slowly peeled back the thin fabric and exposed the creamy flesh.

Rachel's moans were in my ear as my face ducked down, rubbing my cheeks into her deep cleavage as my fingers pulled down on her bra cups. Her arms went around my neck as I lifted up her torso, giving myself the space to take off her blouse and unsnap her bra. And then at last her upper body was bare beneath me.

My eyes went wide as I took in the beauty of her nakedness: perfect breasts, delicate collarbone and neckline, and gorgeous face worthy of a Greek statue.

Rachel took her turn to pull off my shirt. And then we were rolling back and forth on the bed together, rotating who was on top so offending garments could be removed until we were at last fully nude.

I made a move lower, but Rachel held my head up before she flipped us over and put me in a comfortable position on my back with my head on a pillow. And then with a wicked smile, she crawled her way across the bed until she was kneeling over my cock.

"I'm going to suck you now, Johnny. I'm going to suck you until you cum in my mouth. Would you like that?"

I could only nod vigorously.

"Thought you would." Her green eyes flashed in the evening light before she looked downwards. And fisting my cock, her mouth opened up and an surrounded me with warm paradise.

"Ohh... Rachel..." I groaned.

Her right hand wrapped around the shaft and began pumping me slowly but firmly. Her left hand went lower, her fingertips a feather-light brush against my balls. And her mouth was a wonder of movement around my crown as she brought me to brink of orgasm faster than I would have thought possible.

Looking for a way to delay my climax, I sat up and began jerking her hips around to me. Figuring out my motives, Rachel let up her oral attack and moved with me until we were in a sixty-nine and I could feast on her juicing pussy.

For just a brief moment, I thought back to all the times Katie and I were doing this exact same thing in our barn loft. And I promised myself Katie would be healthy enough very soon to do this again. Besides, I very much wanted to see Katie doing this with Rachel again.

But in the meantime, Rachel deep-throated me and began sucking powerfully, and the pleasure called my attention to the task at hand.

I managed to eat her to one orgasm before the hot brunette's talented mouth brought me off. Her fingers squeezed at my balls while she fastened her lips around my shaft, swallowing quickly while I pumped load after load of thick man- cream into her mouth.

Of course, we weren't done yet.

Rachel turned about and cuddled into my arms, kissing me gently. I'd never minded the taste. One of her hands idly stroked my half-deflated pecker. We both knew it would come up on its own eventually. So for now we just enjoyed our kisses.

When my erection did come up, I was spooned in behind her, holding a heavy breast in one hand and stroking her leg with the other. I kept Rachel on her side while I shifted down so I was straddling one of her legs. I entered her from behind, my cock burrowing down into her furthest depths while my body curled over her to cuddle closely once again. Only this time we were joined as one.

I was able to kiss her face, kiss her spine, and lean down to kiss her tits while we made love, the position letting me get so deep inside her body while her pussy clamped down on me so tightly.

"Fuck me, Johnny! Fuck me! Oh heavens, fuck me!" she chanted endlessly.

I got a finger on her clit, and after ten minutes Rachel had already lit off into three orgasms. And in the end, Rachel kicked her leg over so we could press close together in a natural missionary position. And while gazing deeply into her vermillion eyes, I felt my climax approaching.

"Oh, Rachel... I love you..."

"I love you, too..." And then she kissed me. Our mouths were open and our tongues were in each other's mouth when I exploded, shooting ropes of cum out to splatter against her vaginal walls.

We fell asleep together, wrapped up and cuddled for the entire night, just the two of us.

The next day was pretty much the same.

And the next.

***

It was during a festival in town that the reality of my new existence first hit me. The Fourth of July fireworks were launching off in the evening sky, and most people came into town from miles around to meet in the square and enjoy the festivities.

Rachel and I had ventured in to see the sights, buy some candy, and socialize with a few acquaintances. Lin was back for the summer and she was keeping an eye on Katie for me back home.

On more than one occasion throughout the night, I'd seen a younger boy staring at us in the corner of my eye. Now, Rachel and I were at a street vendor picking up some useless trinkets and caught the same boy watching us again, only half- hidden in the shadow of a storefront.

It wasn't the first time a young person had stared at me around town. For many children, I was the first Asian person they'd ever seen. But this boy looked to be at least a young teenager.

I led Rachel along the shops in his general direction, and with a wide-eyed start, the kid realized he had nowhere to hide without making an obvious dash away.

"Hello there," I offered, keeping my voice warm and friendly. Many children relaxed when they found that I could speak perfect, unaccented English. "Have you never seen a Chinese man before?"

Rachel smiled and held onto my arm, snuggling herself tighter into my grasp in an affectionate cuddle. She was used to these encounters.

"Uh, no... I mean, yes! Yes, sir, I have. I'm very sorry. I know it's not polite to stare, sir. But I wasn't staring at you." He looked downcast for a moment and then he moved his gaze over to Rachel, bright wonder in his eyes. "I couldn't help but admire how beautiful your wife is. She's the prettiest girl I've ever seen."

Almost on instinct I was about to correct him and explain that Rachel was not my wife. But then in a way, I felt like she was. And it was an easy mistake to make the way we were clutched together. Clearly, I didn't know what to say.

Rachel swooped in and answered, "Why thank you. That's the nicest compliment I have had in a good long while." She turned to me and punched me gently in the arm. "A little TOO long to go without a nice compliment."

I spent most of the drive home thinking about what the boy said and about the perception of people outside our home. Rachel and I were family now; I'd accepted that. But where Katie was still my wife legally, Rachel had been my wife in action for a long time now. She was the one who I shared my day with. She was the one asking me how I felt or just spending hours talking with me about nothing.

Already, people had started their whispers behind my back when I'd begun appearing in public with Rachel by my side. Everyone we knew and most people in the town knew I was married to Katie but that we stayed on Rachel's farm. But for a long time Rachel and I had not been shy about public affection. While it made for juicy gossip, the townsfolk had come to accept that we were together.

And importantly, for six months now, Rachel had been the only one sharing my bed. Katie had simply lacked the energy. No matter what my intentions had been, Rachel had become like a true wife to me already.

It was strange to think about. Rachel, me, Katie, and Lin. We were all just ten years apart and not blood-related in the slightest. We were more than just neighbors or friends. I knew I loved Rachel. I imagined I loved Rachel more than a lot of married couples loved each other. Our circumstances were just different from a normal couple, that's all.

***

By the time the fall harvest came around, Katie hadn't gotten any better in the entire year. And she was seriously considering her impending death. Some days, her body would hurt so much, both from the disease and the harsh medications, Katie told me she wished she could die just to make the pain go away.

One night, she kissed me as if for the last time on this world. "Rachel would make you a good wife, you know. And when I'm gone, you should marry her."

It was a thought I didn't want to consider. Not that I had a problem with being married to Rachel. But that it would mean Katie was no longer with us. And I knew that half of my heart would fade along with her.

"Come on, Johnny. You're already her husband as much as Bill ever was. Some government piece of paper won't make a difference."

Katie may have been right, but I couldn't accept it at the time. Only one real love in my life might be simpler, but it was an idea I was dead set against. All I said was, "I know Rachel is here, supporting BOTH of us. But that's no excuse for you to give up. I still need you in my life."

***

When the next winter came, a bad feeling was gnawing at my gut. Bad things really always happened to us when winter came. The Masters, Bill Taylor, Katie's relapse, and other assorted events had befallen us when the weather turned cold. I could only pray that the rhythms of our life would keep rolling. That tragedy and sickness would come, but I could not last forever. That hope and health had to be right around the corner. That I was worried over nothing.

But I was wrong.

Two weeks later, Katie lapsed into a coma. The doctors weren't sure if she would ever wake up. They moved her to the hospital where various machines would monitor her full time.

The good news was that it was a shallow coma, her body still getting lots of nutrients and inner activity, so if she ever woke up there was a good chance she could wake up and become as good as new. And we'd had the time to whisper our undying love for each other before her eyes closed.

But then two weeks after that, the doctors told us we'd better prepare our final goodbyes.

***

I sat on the porch of our house, numb to the world. The night air was bitter cold, but I didn't feel it. The moon shone brightly through a haze of clouds, but I didn't see it. I wasn't thinking. I wasn't feeling. I simply sat there.

They would turn off Katie's respirator at 8am tomorrow. Katie had made me promise we wouldn't keep her hooked up to a machine forever. If it was her time to go, then it was her time. She had been there for me when I was just a boy, on my own. And then we'd grown up together. But perhaps now my time with her was at an end.

Rachel came out with a warm blanket and a hot cup of coffee. I barely sensed her presence as she wrapped the blanket around me and set the coffee down on the table next to me.

After what seemed like hours, the coffee was cold and untouched, and I was still staring off at nothing.

But then suddenly there was a warm body sitting in my lap. The abrupt weight and the unbelievable heat around me shocked me back into reality for a moment. I had become so cold that simple body heat felt like it was burning my skin.

"Johnny?" Rachel asked. She was wrapped up in her own blanket, her eyes red from her own crying.

"I'm here," I answered.

"Sorry for intruding, but I just couldn't be alone inside anymore. Lin already went to bed."

Inwardly, I groaned. I wanted my mourning, but at the same time, I'd neglected to consider how hard this was on Rachel as well. I had always been on the receiving end of her comfort. She was always consoling me over Katie's gradual decline. And yet the situation was tearing her apart and she had no one else to console her.

I wrapped her up in my arms as Rachel turned to straddle my legs, facing me. I felt at least some peace come over me as she leaned forward and let her forehead come to rest against mine. We just held each other for a few minutes, breathing slowly.

"She was your best friend," I mumbled. "I'm sorry for being selfish and worrying only about myself. I know you'll miss her too."

Immediately she answered, "You don't ever have to say you're sorry. I know what it's like to lose a spouse. You have every right to be a little selfish."

Then she turned my head and held it to her chest, where I could hear her heart beating strongly. "I thought I was all on my own. But you and Katie were there for me. The least I can do is return the favor."

"Thank you," I sighed and let some of the tension run out of me. As much as I hated it, I'd known the end was coming for Katie and me, and a part of me had accepted it. I was so very thankful to Rachel for supporting me... truly loving me; and I loving her...

So I said it... "I love you, Rachel."

She picked her head up and we looked into each other's eyes. "I know. I love you, too." It was a familiar phrase between us already.

But that wasn't good enough for me. The tone in her voice had been a love of family, of reliability and support and concern. I wanted her to realize what she meant to me and I wished there was some higher word I could use to make her understand. "No, Rachel. I LOVE you. I love you as a partner in my life. I love you as my wife, in spirit even if not in legal name... well, yet."

"Yet?"

"I want to marry you, Rachel."

Her breath was suddenly gone, and Rachel clutched herself to me in mild shock.

I just held her and continued. "I know the timing might be weird. But I talked this over with Katie a long time ago. You're already my wife. I'm already your husband. The love I feel for you deserves nothing less than that title."

Rachel just seized my head in her hands and planted a fat kiss on my cold lips. The heat of her passion soon warmed me and the touch of her tongue re-ignited the roar of my heart. And when she finally pulled away, her emerald eyes flared before suddenly tightening in a wince.

"I want to feel happy," Rachel moaned. "But I'm guilty at the same time. We wouldn't be having this conversation if Katie wasn't sick."

"We could agonize over the 'ifs' for eternity. But what's real is how we feel about each other. Maybe we won't get married right away. Maybe it will take some time before I'm emotionally ready for a ceremony like that. But I wanted to let you know my intentions. I love you, Rachel. And when the time is right, will you marry me?"

Tears burst forth as if the fragile dam holding her emotions back simply disintegrated all at once. And then Rachel was kissing me as if she'd never kissed me before. She broke away just long enough to whisper an ecstatic "Yes!" and then went right back to kissing me.

The cold, biting air of winter seemed to evaporate, leaving nothing but the warmth of our love cocooning around our bodies. Our lips stayed pressed together, joy at new beginnings still bittersweet by the thought of my beautiful wife slipping away. She slipped off of my lap and started tugging me out of my chair. "We still have a few hours before we have to go to the hospital. Come inside and make love with me."

I smiled.

"Besides," Rachel teased, "Katie will rest easier knowing we still have each other."

I followed Rachel up the stairs and into her bedroom, or rather, OUR bedroom. I'd been sleeping in this upstairs room for quite some time.

At the foot of the bed, Rachel turned around and beckoned me into her embrace. We stood and kissed again. I felt the wonder of rediscovering her as if we were new lovers, and yet our actions were well coordinated and familiar as people practiced at making love to each other.

I turned and slid myself into the covers of the bed, feeling the initial shock of cold sheets before my body heat slowly began to thaw them out. I scooted around until I was sitting upright, reclining back against soft pillows while I watched the grace of Rachel's movements.

She stepped to the side of the bed nearest to me before slipping off her robe and then reaching to the fasteners of her nightgown. Without hurry, she shed each layer of clothing, looking down into my eyes the whole time.

Despite her stripping and the tug of desire to watch each inch of skin reveal itself to me, I found my gaze locked right back into Rachel's brilliantly green eyes. And so she became fully nude without me really noticing, and then she slid her body directly on top of mine and tucked herself underneath the blankets to shield herself from the cold.

I held her hips and positioned her directly over me while she parted my robe to the sides and pressed her palms against my bare chest. And as her knees planted on the mattress on either side of me, Rachel slid back and dragged my pajama pants and underwear down until we were both naked.

No words were spoken. None were needed. Our hearts communicated this need to each other. We both were broken inside, and somehow being together made us whole once again. Making love like this convinced us that things weren't so bad.

Her tongue dipped in between my lips at the same time her hips descended down and my hard cock glided through her wet folds and penetrated deeply into Rachel's body.