A Gift From His Father Ch. 17

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Mark Taylor - (African American) accounting student, childhood friend and former classmate of John. Working for Cindy Ashe and recently became intimate with her, was mind controlled by Candace for a while until John found out.

Jacqueline Winchester Smith - Forty years old (5"5') bears a striking resemblance to Andie MacDowell. Comes from old money (Winchester Family) had bad attitude and now must pleasure herself daily as a punishment. John calls her Jackie, no one else can get away with it. At John's house warming/orgy Mary planted a few thoughts into her mind, "From now on, Jackie, whenever you see me you will remember this moment. You will feel the urge to have my cock (strap-on) in your pussy, or your mouth on my pussy. You will remember how much fun we had together at this orgy. If you hear me say the word 'bitch' you will have a strong climax."

The Smith Triplets: Their father Dr. Zachary Smith used them as part of his plan to control more power from the ring. They were born looking androgynous (supposed to be boys). When John meets them they have no shape and barely and any tits. Heather Smith - (age is 24) First born of the triplets and John's half sisters was physically altered into a bimbo as punishment for trying to kill John (reducing her IQ by 30 points). Made into a blonde, permanently painted pink nails, landing strips, has invisible initial tattooed on forehead. Her breasts were grown into E cups in chapter 13. She redeemed herself in Chapter 15 and was rewarded with the return of her IQ and was given the body of an Olympic swimmer, although still busty. She was mind controlled to fuck the pool man. Isabel Smith is the second born of the triplets altered physically into a beautiful young woman with brown hair styled like Megan Fox, had "C" cups tits, permanently painted honey brown colored nails, landing strips, has invisible initial tattooed on forehead. Like Heather, She was mind controlled to fuck the Ana their housekeeper. Samantha Smith the youngest of the triplets altered physically into a beautiful young woman. Auburn hair styled like Amy Adams with "C" cups, permanently painted orange nails, landing strips, has invisible initial tattooed on forehead. She is now compelled to fuck the gardener.

Chance Goodwin - One of the original agents/slaves to the Ring of Power, thought to be long dead. Rumors spoke of a man having amazing gifts living in the tropics. No one would be able to find him if he didn't want to be found. He was near death having been disconnected from the Ring of Power so long until John landed on the island.

Jerome Fox - John's first male agent (bisexual), blonde blue eyed Arian type, muscular 6'4, was recently relocated to the LA area, to work in the adult film industry with Tammy, has a natural eleven inch cock.

Dennis (Denise) Sour - Is a "shape shifter", captured by John and made to be completely loyal to him. He was an Asian man (Lee) at the orgy and a small black woman. John turned him into a woman suppressing his powers to change shapes.

Erica Green - Is a big "coffee black" lesbian hospital worker (6'2") she's not fat just big. Rachel Woods befriended her when Candace wasn't available for her to service. She has a small nose piercing and kinky black hair she wears short. Thought she'd made Rachel her bitch until Rachel was able to get her a better job as an orderly, since Rachel got her fired from the cafeteria.

Mike Simpson - A short portly man who manages the downtown homeless center that John has chosen as his charitable beneficiary. April Martin is acting as John's administrator on this project.

Mel Katz - Senior Producer at Absolutely Wicked Productions and credited with the discovery Tammy and Jeremy.

Dinah Cohen - Is one of the partners of the law firm of Basil, Cohen & Brown the firm that specialized in not for profit law.

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Michael56SmithMichael56Smithover 1 year ago

Continues with many tenses' problems, many wrong or misspelled words, ... a good English-speaking proofreader and a story editor (for continuity and to keep 'dumb' errors to a minimum) might be a good idea, as this tale is growing, ... still liking this story, and daydreaming about what I might do with such power, before I was then trapped inside the ring's limbo space (oopsy). Very creative! ;-) TTFN

AnonymousAnonymousover 4 years ago
Bank Teller?

You list the bank teller in your character sheet but you haven't shown him getting his justice yet.

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago
dumb

during fight with Chance, John has buried him under a partially collapsed house.

Instead of leaving him there John goes and digs him out giving Chance another opportunity to win the fight.

Despite Elizabeth's belated explanation of what went down on the island, it is inexscusable that she did not fully brief John ahead of time and deliberately let him walk into a trap where he could have been killed. This, in itself, is a betrayal of

Master and a huge gap in the logic of the story -- then John is portrayed as being too dumb to see it.

MuledriverMuledriverabout 9 years ago
The bank president......

I am just now reading everything in order since I just found your story. Now to the topic: The Bank President (vice president, which ever) Mike Adams. I do not recall that particular thread being wrapped up and Adams being fired, or what ever was done. I have read everything up to this point in just a couple of days. It is possible that I missed it, but I don't remember it. I only mention Adams, because, he was listed in you players roundup at the end of the chapter, and I occasionally wonder when you will return to finish that thread.

Now to pile on a bit. :( Looking at the posting time line, you have had nearly two years writing this awesome story. I have seen some small improvements in the spelling and grammar. Please (if you haven't already) get some editing help, you have had many offers. If you have some, you may wish to find either a different editor, or more editors. They are not catching as much as they should. I hope to see more polish with this great story in the future.

I am not too concerned with how fast you post new chapters in your story. I understand that ideas and writing takes time. I am reading another series that gets a new chapter about once a month that is about 15 pages. lol She has a LOT of editing help and I rarely stumble across grammatical errors.

Love the story, keep it up. :D

verysadboyverysadboyover 9 years ago
Dick slaps her face while they are kissing?

His cock must be very long or he is a contortionist.

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