A Light in the Darkness

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Haitian author and college student tells his story.
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Samuelx
Samuelx
2,122 Followers

Everyday, I go to my college campus to do some work. My name is Stevenson and I am twenty one years old. Right now, my life is crappy but I'm hoping that someday it's going to get better. I live in a house full of relatives who hate my guts. From my psychotic aunt and her witch daughter to her passive-aggressive husband and their clueless son. They're all a bunch of really annoying people who get on my nerves. Ever feel like some people drain you dry? They're soul-sucking dream crushers who will destroy you if you let them. I don't want to let them do that to me. Not now. Not ever. That's why I spend very little time at the house, or should I say the madhouse.

I am going to city college, studying Criminal Justice because I want to be a police officer someday. That means staying out of trouble and getting good grades. I also can't go around beating some sense into those buffoons and witches who have it coming even though it would make me feel really good. Why? Simply because no police department in the nation will hire a person with a criminal record. I have to stay clean, until I get out of school and make it to the state police academy. That's why I walk five miles to school everyday. That's why I endure the damn Massachusetts cold. That's why I endure living in a house full of people who hate my guts.

My father lives far away, all the way in Haiti. He still supports me by sending me some cash monthly and paying for my college education. My mother ran out on us a long time ago. Where she lives and what she's doing is none of my business. That boat sailed ages ago. My sister is a sociopath, enough said. She lives in Florida with a young man who was foolish enough to marry her stupid ass. I feel bad for him. No, wait. I don't. I think that bad things sometimes happen to good people. However, sometimes stupid people bring all kinds of trouble on themselves. I once told my sister's boyfriend that she was a sociopath and a crazy bitch to boot. Did he listen to me? Nope. He married her and moved to Florida with her. What a punk!

Yeah, so here I was at school. The college campus is full of all kinds of people. You've got the bastards and the bitches. They make up ninety percent of the campus. There are also the snitches, the dummies, the haters, the dope smokers and the thugs. Most of the population of the community college I attend is pure scum. Male and female alike, I despise them. It's next to impossible to find a smart person in that place. If you meet someone who seems smart, the odds are that he or she is a poser or a wannabe. I hate posers and wannabes. They are pure scum. Nothing wrong with having ambitions and aspirations but I despise losers and fakers who are masquerading as anything better than they are. The world is full of them, college campuses especially.

Yeah, I've painted a pretty bleak picture. However, there is a light in the darkness. I write stories. Erotic fiction, for the most part. I've written several large anthologies and I hope someday to become a published author. It's my dream. It gives me something to live for. yep, I was a big and tall Black man with a dream. Unlike so many others out there, I was perfectly willing to work to make my dreams come true. And I didn't want to let anyone discourage me. I wanted to make it in this life. Unlike those fools out there, I had a plan. The plan was to go to college and graduate with a degree in Criminal Justice. Another part of the plan was staying out of trouble and avoiding anything even resembling a criminal record. So far, I was clean but it only takes one mistake to screw you up for good. Another part of the plan was getting my work out there. I had already found a small publisher interested in my work. It was currently in production and would soon hit the market. Isn't that sweet?

Speaking of sweets, I've really got to stop eating sweets. Seriously, folks. My father is diabetic, as are my sister, aunt and several other people in the family. I really don't want this for myself so I've started eating healthy. It's not easy because I'm a big eater. I particularly love meat but I've got to cut back. This morning, I bought a vegetarian meal for the first time. I've decided to stick to it. I don't want to end up a vegetable so I'm eating vegetables. It would suck for me to graduate from college and publish my work yet drop dead of diabetes without having the chance to enjoy the life I've worked so hard to create for myself.

These days, I keep to myself. It's hard being me, folks. Really hard. I do whatever odd jobs I can to make a few bucks but employment is hard to find, especially for me. We'll get to that later. Why is my life so tough? I came to America seven years ago with my dad, mom and sister. My parents decided that my sister and I would live with our uncle and aunt in a house which our two families would buy. We moved in. that's when everything started to go wrong. The same year we moved in, my father got arrested at the airport while coming from Haiti because of some glitch. He got sent back to Haiti. He was traveling with my passport, which got seized by the Immigration Services. I think my mother and aunt had something to do with it. They all but celebrated his downfall. You know witches and their schemes. Often they're out to take a man down and you can never figure out why. Well, since my mom joined the man-hating sisterhood, I've sort of disowned her. I can forgive anything except treachery, deceit, manipulation and betrayal. Those were her crimes. So, I stayed in touch with my father and maintained zero contact with my so-called mom. Through the years, my father tried to take care of us.

Father would always send me some money when he could. Also, he paid for my college education. I miss him terribly. He's my heart. Dad sent some money so that my aunt could hire a lawyer to solve the Immigration trouble I found myself in after dad got sent back home by the Bureau. Since he was traveling with my passport, it got seized too. I was left in the USA without legal papers in a house full of people who hated me. Isn't life fun and exciting? In spite of all these things, I kept my head up. I worked hard in school. I'm very close to graduating college. I hope someday to straighten out my immigration issues and become a U.S. Citizen.

Even though I am not working in the field of Criminal Justice yet, in many ways I already am. I noticed that in the USA, the system discriminates against men. Especially in the Justice System. Take domestic violence for example. Male victims of domestic violence don't receive help. Men who are living with violent women have no one to turn to. I looked online and found an agency which helped male victims of domestic abuse. I volunteered for that organization. I made flyers with their name, goals and contact information. I handed out these flyers to just about everyone I encountered.

I also noticed that a lot of men weren't doing too well in the area of education. The reason why is because the system neglected male students, in both high school and college, for decades. Now it's becoming obvious that there is a crisis in men's education. Male students are more likely not to graduate than their female counterparts. An organization in Alaska has started a program to help male students nationwide. I liked that very much. So I made flyers about them and handed them out to people. I wanted to spread the word that someone out there was helping male students. Maybe if enough people found out, they could demand change from the Powers That Be. Who are the Powers That Be? The women and men in high places who use their powers to discriminate against men under the blanket of political correctness. I despise these people. Enough said.

It's times like these that I really miss my dad. I wish I could show him my report card. I'm doing really well in Criminal Justice because I like what I do. I understand the stuff. Also, I'm putting myself out there to help people and encouraging others to do the same. I am proud of the man that I am becoming and I wonder what my father would think. We still talk on the phone but I haven't seen him in ages. The government prevents him from coming to America. I wonder if I will ever see him again. Maybe it's a blessing that he can't come to America. This place discriminates against men and my father is a strong, proud man. I'd hate for him to be mistreated. I'm resilient, so I can handle it. I hope we meet again someday.

Another thing I'd like to discuss with my father is my true self. While living in America, I've discovered that I was bisexual. Yep. I was Haitian and bisexual. A Black man who found both men and women attractive. These days, I am single and celibate. Why? My life is way too complicated for me to be in a relationship right now. Also, relationships aren't always a good thing to get on. While living in America, I've seen the lives and careers of countless men destroyed because of their involvements with the wrong women. Men aren't presumed innocent until proven guilty in American courts. Not when their accuser is a woman. Guilty or innocent, all men are seen as evil by the gender-biased courts. They're always seen as the guilty party and almost always lynched by the man-hating sisterhood which has its claws in the media, education and politics. Free speech is just another word in America. It has no real value.

Yeah, back to the subject at hand. My father's opinion of me has always mattered a great deal to me. More than anyone else, I respect him. When I was growing up, my dad was the man who did amazing things. When the power went out in our neighborhood in Haiti, he would climb the electrical pole and fix it. He would restore power for the entire neighborhood by himself. He was an amazing man. He still is. I love him. What would he think of me now? As a college student, an activist for Male Victims of Domestic Abuse, Men's Rights and Men's Issues and also as a bisexual Black man? What would he say? I don't know. I hope to find out someday. It's what I pray for. it is my hope that my father and I will be together someday. Reunited like Odysseus and Telemachus at the end of the Odyssey. It would be a wonderful day. It gave me something to live for.

Samuelx
Samuelx
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AnonymousAnonymousabout 5 years ago
Your “work”...

...illustrates the word “shit” beautifully.

asiaprofasiaprofover 17 years ago
I'm touched...

You make Haitian aspirations come alive.

And by extension, those of all the 3rd world....

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