A Secret Even to Myself Ch. 09

"So what? It's legal in California."

"Who are you without Matt?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Mahin tightened her arms around her waist.

"How do people describe you when Matt not part of your equation? What makes you, Mahin?"

"I am me. I don't know what you mean. I love my boyfriend what wrong with that.

It sounds like your world revolves around this person. It's unbalanced. You're codependent on Matt and it sounds like he's not very good to you. For you."

"I didn't ask for your opinion."

"Your right. You didn't. But I'm giving it anyway. And I don't what another entry in this journal to be about Matt unless I permit it. You need self-reflection and obviously, you need more guidance on what to and how to self-reflect. That was my mistake, I asked too much of you. So, I will guide you every night for now on."

Tonight I want 400 words what you think your life would be like had you not met Matt.

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Mahin's eyes popped open in a panic. Thankfully, the door was still closed and the dark room was a kind blanket. The house was so quiet not even the sleeping gulls lulling could be heard. Eventually, Tobias will come downstairs from his kingly chambers and re-open her door. It was his rules and his palace after all. Mahin rolled her eyes at her own thoughts.

She reached over to turn on the bedside light to find her empty lipstick case in the side table. Crafty was her middle name. She tapped the cleaned out lipstick to dislodge one of the pills she swiped from this morning. She carefully hid the pills in her lipstick.

She sighed and popped it into her mouth. Already feeling a calm, she turned out the light and snuggled deeper into her wobbly bed. 9 weeks seemed so far away and her large California king and Egyptian cotton sheets were deeply missed. She couldn't wait to go home and cuddle with Matt. He would climb from the foot of the bed with a wicked side smile. Kissing her ankle to her knees that he would slightly push aside to place himself in between her and kiss he way up the sensitive inseam teasingly around her mound to her belly, trembling with anticipation onto he was completely over her.

"You indeed are a naughty girl," Tobias whispered as he leaned over her. His strong arms framing her body against the bed as he spoke so close to her, his lips a mere inch away from hers.

She couldn't speak, she dare not speak. But her heart beat faster than a butterfly. His signature scent of the cool crisp ocean and sage woods danced at her nose.

"Why must you goad me so much?" He asked and this time he kissed her lips. His lips were so soft and each kiss was an invitation for her to give in, give him her all. Then he stopped just a few inches above her lips again. "See,it's not fair to tease, is it?" Tobias whispered.

Mahin opened her legs wider, her hips rose to meet his. She could feel everything even through her thin pajama pants. His body was scorching. The energy rose off of him fueled by heat. He was like a furnace hot for her.

"Oh, so now you know what it's like to be teased," Tobias chuckled while setting himself more firmly between her legs. "I bet if I dip my fingers into your pjs, I'll find a very wet cunt." She shuddered. She had never heard anyone refer to her with such vulgarity. It was startling and new, it turned her on more. She rose her hips and welcomed the slight touch of his hard cock still safe and nestled in his pants.

"Be still. My little pet." He reached down and steadied her hips firmly to the mattress. Tobias chuckled and kissed her cheek. A tear fell from her eyes. "You are crying? Out of frustration?"

Mahin whimpered trying not to admit. Her hips danced little circles deeper into the mattress obeying his order not to thrust up in a beg for more.

"Answer me." He said sternly but still kissed her cheek, "Be a big girl and tell me what you want, Mahin."

"I want you," Mahin whispered shyly.

"See, teasing isn't so bad after all," Tobias grinned.

He kissed her deeply again. His tongue painting her mouth with lust as he settled his hips down to hers giving her a training lesson. His body thrust up into her pelvis. If only their clothes were not in the way she would have wrapped her legs around him to keep him still and give her more.

"What do you want?" Tobias said again this time feathering his fingers at the band of her pants. "You know how this game goes, Mahin. Tell me."

"I want you." she admitted desperately.

"Look at me," Tobias stopped his kisses. Mahin didn't realize that she was clenching her eyes closed. She opened them and saw Tobias. It was almost like seeing him for the first time. Grey searching eyes always looking for something, someone. Searching for her most intimate secrets but would shield her from the troubles of those secrets. His lips usually were a set line on his face but tonight it was beautiful, stern sensuality but fierce and sweet.

Her body stretched long, trying to ease the strong tension building in her core. It was a moments relief almost a release until he again gave her a refill of need. His body rocked into her. His fingers traveled lower to her soft lips and with just a simple whisp over her lips she was writhing again.

"Be still," he said with less authority and more need. He gathered her wetness from below her lips and covered her mound yet never touching her clit and not even entering her. She was going to explode. Her nipples felt stressed her legs were electrifying and her clit was hungry. Finally, he gave her what she wanted. He circled her clit with the perfect amount of pressure. He was building her and building her. Her body arched up she was so close and he continued to build brick by brick, torturous circle after circle. Nature was taking over she was losing... and then he stopped and simply removed his hand from between them and sucked his fingers.

"Delicious." He teased and then kissed her so she could taste her need.

"Please."

"Oh. So you teased and now you beg," Tobias' voice was like gentle silk.

"Please,"

"Please what my dear."

"Fuck me."

"If you wish, my dear."

Before she knew what happened in a whirlwind, he thrust into her. She didn't understand how her clothes had evaporated but they did. Tobias' cock inside her made her forget logic.

No man had taken her this way and so satisfied her with a single thrust. He filed her and his furnace chest was equally as hot as his cock. He pulled out and thrust into her again. He nipples ached. Again, her shirt was gone, evaporated with a single thought and all reason was abandon once his soft lips found her nipples, sucking, pulling and nibbling.

It was all too much to contain any longer. Her pussy gripped him and his length filled her so it felt like she was wrapping her arms in a hug around a much bigger person. She wrapped her legs around his waist to hug him and keep him where she wanted him. He had another goal and began to pump into her faster. Her pussy was just enjoying the ride. He reached her depths and retreated, each withdrawal a tease and each entering a greeting.

Tobias was a mature, wild lover. He knew how to pace and then take her to the precipice and just as she was ready to jump off, he'd catch her arm and pull her in close for the most gentle and sensual embrace while never letting her fire wane. She couldn't take it anymore and scream in ecstasy.

Mahin jerked so hard she woke up. Her heart racing and it was hard to catch her breath. She frantically looked around in the dark room. The door was closed and the only breathing in the room was her own. It was all a dream. A dream about Tobias giving her the best sex of her life. She was relieved that it was a dream.

Mahin exhaled loudly and violently re-fluffed her pillow and slipped deeper in the bed in complete frustration.

Was it a relief it was just a dream?

She felt so full in the dream. Now... she felt...

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Dear Readers,

Finally, some mind fuckery is happening here for our main characters, at least within their own heads. Maybe they will be able to do some together soon. I was thinking about how crushes suddenly develop when you are not even thinking about the guy. Often with just the turn of the wind or a simple suggestion and you suddenly see them in another light. And now they are the hottest thing you've ever laid eyes on. That's what I think is happening here. And of course, you deny in your mind for weeks because you know logically you wouldn't have given the person a second glance had someone not mentioned his attractiveness. Mahin dug the crush grave for herself teasing Tobias and now she's in it.

This chapter is a wee bit longer. I was on a roll filling in the gaps between the other bits of the story and having a little fun doing it.

Writing and publishing each week has been a real fun and daunting challenge. But your feedback has been great. So, I want to stick to it.

I am going on vacation so I am going to have to take a brief pause on publishing while I am away. I am actually debating on leaving my computer behind. Whoa, whoa whoa. :-)

I mentioned a few weeks ago about a surprise. So stay tune. If you are a regular fan of my stories I hope it's a fun surprise. And hopefully, with this surprise you won't miss my two weeks away too much.

Until the end of vacation.

Cheers and Happy Reading,

Talyis