Be Careful What You Confess Ch. 01

/cries

Reader Comments:

"• sad face"

"Drug him, kidnap him and tie him down and rape him. Once he's done the dirty you've got him. Claim rape if he won't toe the line"

(WTF? No extreme is too crazy to rope and brand the lover of your dreams these days it seems for some women. Already I could tell that this board was just teeming with 'crazy'. No wonder Rita liked this site! She wasn't going to get any marriage saving advice here.)

******

"My husband won't give me a divorce! I've found the man I really and truly love and the rat bastard won't set me free to find happiness! He controls the money and if I leave him I'd never get a cent of our savings, or see our two young children again. He'd ruin me in the divorce! There has to be a way to escape!"

Reader Comments:

":< angry face"

"Do what ever it takes. Fight the bastard for everything, take everything he's got."

"Give yourself some fake injuries and blame your husband. Get a steady stream of 'domestic assault' police calls to your house and get photos. You'll screw him for every dime he has in court!"

(And so on. It just got worse and scarier. The idea of making fraudulent battered spouse claims didn't scare or deter anyone. Some of the readers even posted specific helpful advice, allegedly from experience… on how to make their claims of abuse more believable in court. Holy shit! Who were these crazy women and why was my wife now raving insanely about me blocking a divorce we had never discussed? What children? This was a whole metric crapload of insanity and it was growing worse with each post!)

******

"I've got to find a way to break free. He's watching me like a hawk, checking over everything that I do. He's even got my boss at work checking up constantly on me for him. I can't get the chance to show what an abusive manipulator he really is. Getting the police to 'catch him' is going to be hard. It might be easier to try a different plan. Things would be so much easier if I were a widow! My dear Roger would most certainly be there to comfort me!"

Reader Comments:

"Evil face + Smile"

"Kill that abusive bastard!"

"Honey, you DESERVE to be happy and don't let anyone stand in your way!"

(Holy fucking crap! Did these crazy women actually advocate murdering someone's husband in order to upgrade to a better boyfriend? There weren't quite as many comments here, but there was precious little sanity. The overwhelming conclusion was very definitely that the ends justify the means.)

*******

(The next half dozen postings are skipped due to insane psychodrama overload. The crazy bitches accepted it as gospel that I was a psychotic pedophile tyrant who abused and daily beat my family within an inch of their lives. Or in other words, a typical male as depicted on the Lifetime Cable TV channel. Various methods of murdering me and getting away with it were discussed until one black widow poster, again quoting from significant personal experience, suggested an overseas source for buying certain nearly untraceable poisons such as pancuronium bromide, a favorite substance of government spies and black widows everywhere.

Finally, here was her last published comment posted the previous week.)

******

"I did it! I bought a $100 dollar gift credit card with cash and ordered a little bottle of my 'problem solver' over their website. It should ship from India this week and I might hopefully have it in my hands by July 4th, my very own Independence Day! I'll put it in his coffee where the sugar will cover the slight bitterness and the slight citrus tang. Hurray! Soon, my lovely Roger, soon we will be together forever! He's pushing me to hurry up and do the deed so that he can comfort this poor widow - I've already got a hot little dress in black that will do perfectly for our next meeting together!"

Reader Comments:

"You Go Girl!"

(More homicidal craziness, Etc, ad nausium.)

********

Ok, even a dullard would get the idea by now that my loving wife was going to poison me and then run into the comforting arms of her lover.

Still, as shocking as this whole thing was, it was just too crazy. I was certainly not an abusive spouse, nor did I molest our non-existent children. The minute she asked me for a divorce - it was hers… no argument. The whole situation just made no sense.

I was still alive, so obviously her 'wonder drug' had not yet arrived. Just in case, I decided to skip drinking any coffee at home this weekend.

The entire series of confessions just seemed too strange and bizarre to be true, but just in case I print screened the lot of them and put the printouts into a folder and locked in my desk with a note "To be opened in the event of my death". I had nothing to take to the police or even worth a phone call to one of my friends.

I stewed about the situation for a good hour after I should have already left work but in the end I trotted on home like a good lamb to await my execution. Somehow, I thought, I'd either find some proof to back up this wild ass story or else it would all turn out to be massive psycho craziness.

By Monday, I'd either be poisoned and dead or ready to pack up my shit and move to somewhere else less packed chock-full of crazy.