Better off Dead

Normally, driving was an adventure for me. I can afford almost any car I want. But as a kid, I'd gotten hooked on old school muscle cars. I drove a 2012 Shelby GT 500 Mustang. I love that car, but today it was only a way to get from point A to point B.

As I reached my subdivision and slowed down, as the road wound between manicured lawns and landscaped gardens, the car's 500+ horsepower growl became a low menacing rumble. I waved at a few of my neighbors before pulling into my own extremely long circular driveway. I went into the house with an unhurried air about me.

The front door opened and a man and woman of about my age stood in front of me.

The man looked at me and simply nodded. "No muss, no fuss," he said. I followed the two of them into the kitchen of the house. I opened a door into a large pantry. There were shelves from floor to ceiling on both sides of the pantry. They were stacked with all kinds of food items. Some contained cooking implements or pots and pans or specialized appliances. The rear wall had large and small shiny pans hung from hooks that took up a lot of the space. Everything in the room was there for one purpose. If you asked most people they'd say that it was cooking, but that wasn't it.

The entire pantry was a gateway. The floor to ceiling shelves, are there to hide the hinges. The entire rear wall swung free easily after I disengaged the locks with a remote control similar to a garage door opener. I descended a short flight of stairs and ended up in front of another massive door. I opened this one and went inside. The two large doors were linked mechanically so that only one of them could open at a time.

Inside of the door was a very large room. It was bigger than most apartments. It had its own large bathroom and even a small kitchen. There, lying on the bed, apparently asleep, was a young woman. She was a very pretty young woman but she didn't seem to know it yet. She was four years younger than I am and although she didn't seem to know that either, she belonged to me now.

* * * * * *

Zeke

I turned to Reb to voice my anger.

"Where the fuck is she?" I asked. "That bitch has been gone for almost an hour and a half. It don't take that fucking long ta go ta the sebm alebm and git some beer."

"Why the hell are ya asking me?" he grunted. "She's your wife, not mine."

He looked around for something to spit his tobacco into. When he didn't find it, he just stepped over to the door and outside of it and spit it onto the ground. He sat down on the cinder block that served as a step.

"Sheeeyit, it's hot out here," he said. "Maybe she had a stroke or something trying ta carry the beer back. You probably should have gone yourself or at least let her drive your truck."

"After the way she sassed me this morning?" I spat. "She's lucky I let her keep her fucking teeth. That bitch is too ungrateful for everything I've given her already."

"I told you from the beginning that Victoria was the wrong girl for you Zeke," he said. "She read too many God damned books as a child. Reading them books fucked her up in the head. It gave her all a them ideas. I told you from jump street that the best one a my sisters was Tammy. She's named after Tammy Wynette, so if she knows how ta do anything, it's how ta stand by her man."

"Tammy's ass is too fat," I said.

"Shit, when you get Victoria pregnant, her ass is gonna spread too," laughed Reb. "But that'll also settle her down a bit. Once you git her a baby in her belly, she'll realize her place in the grand scheme a things."

"Hell, it ain't like I ain't been trying," I said. "But I'm not as young as I used ta be."

"Uh, Zeke," said Reb. "We need ta talk, seriously."

I felt my neck hair raise up but I nodded my head.

"Zeke, my daddy was your best friend, so you're like family," he began. "I don't know how ta zackly tell you this. This here is a real delicate situation, but it's kind of why I mentioned Tammy before. They always say that the good lord will give us a solution to our problems. They also say that a man's home is his castle, right?"

I nodded but I looked over at Reb for any sign of what the fuck he was hinting around at.

"Zeke, maybe it ain't you," he said.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Do you and Victoria fuck a lot?" he asked.

"Probably not as much as I'd like," I said. "But the old log does git buried somewhat regularly whether she wants to or not."

"And that's exactly my point, brother in law," he said. "She ought to have her uppity ass at least a couple of kids by now if not more."

"Dam right," I said.

"And you are obviously not getting your fair share of poon tang from Victoria, yet you refuse to beat her," he said. "You're too nice that girl, by double," he said.

I nodded in agreement.

"But a man needs ta take care of his itches, Zeke," he continued. "That shit is in the bible somewhere. So nobody would fault you if you went somewhere else ta git your itch scratched."

He looked me in the eye and I blinked.

"I thought so," he said. "And I also think, or at least I have an idea that you did it in a very thoughtful and family oriented way didn't you?"

"I guess..." I said. "I'm sorry Reb, but I..." He held his hand up to silence me.

"Zeke, ain't nobody complaining. You're getting what you need. Tammy, who has been alone since Denny run off and got his ass kilt in Iraq is as happy as a pig in shit, and until recently nobody else knew."

I nodded, expecting there to be a "BUT" coming.

"But," he said, right on cue. "Something is coming up." My heart dropped.

"And the something that's coming up appears ta be Tammy's belly, because fat ass or not you done knocked up the wrong sister. That got me ta thinking that maybe the problem with you and Victoria ain't with you. Maybe my baby sister is just barren. I mean the two of you have been married now for five God damned years and even if as you say, she just don't like ta fuck, SOMETHING should have happened before now."

I nodded my head. "Shit, I wish your father was still around," I said. "He was a man of honor. If he sold you a bad pig, he'd make it right and..." He held up that hand again then.

"I'm gonna make this one right too," he said. "But this ain't zackly easy as if it was pigs. My daddy would have given you another pig..." he stared off into space for a moment. "That's it," he said. "You can have Tammy too."

"What?" I asked.

"You're legally married to Victoria. But we all know there are problems there. Now you could go through all of the hassle of trying to divorce her and going through the courts because you really shouldn't have to put up with her shit. Putting up with it like you have for all of these years for a woman whose insides are broken is just saintly, but if you divorce her you're gonna have to give her half of your shit. It's cheaper to keep her. But just take Tammy too."

"What?" I said again.

"Look at it this way," he said. "Victoria don't like ta fuck. Tammy does. Victoria apparently can't get pregnant and give you kids. So she's pretty much useless except for standing around and looking pretty and even then you have to deal with her smart ass mouth, right."

"So you take Tammy too," he continued. "That way you have the best of both worlds. Ya got one woman ta show and one woman ta go. Move Tammy into your bedroom let Victoria sleep on the couch. Hell, that way you've even got someone around ta watch all of them kids you're gonna be puttin' into Tammy." He slapped me on the shoulder and smiled.

"I'll leave it up to you to tell them," he said. "Don't worry about Tammy, she's all for it. And Victoria needs some comeuppance anyway. God Damn, that thinking is thirsty work. Where's the beer?"

Two hours later our mood had changed from ticked, to pissed, to God damned sullen. "Let's go get her," he said. I nodded again.

We jumped in my Dodge Ram pickup and headed for the seven eleven. It was so hot by then that you could fry an egg on the road and we didn't have any fucking beer. Victoria was obviously trying to kill me.

I looked all over the store and I saw plenty of beer, but no Victoria. I snatched a case of Shotz beer out of the cooler. It wasn't very cold so it probably hadn't been in the cooler for very long. When I got to the counter, I saw that stupid kid behind the register. I think his name was Chester or something. He went to school with Victoria when they were younger and had always had a crush on her.

"Chester, what time did Victoria leave here?" I asked. He looked back at me with a blank look.

"Victoria's coming over here?" he asked smiling. Before I'd mentioned my dumb assed wife, the boy had been all business and too busy to even look my way. But now he looked like he'd happily suck my dick for a bit of info on that lame brained bitch.

"Chester, she should have been here and been back home three times by now," I said.

He shook his head vigorously. "Victoria ain't been here. If she had, I'd have seen her," he smiled. "Hey Harlan," he yelled to an older, bored looking guy. Harlan came over to us.

"What can I do for you gents?" he asked, in a bored sounding voice.

"Was Victoria in here earlier?" asked Chester.

"Who?" asked Harlan.

"You know Victoria, the woman I..." began Chester.

"Oh, that purty gold haired girlie that you always go on about," laughed Harlan. "How would I know? There've been so God damned many people in and out of here today already that I can barely remember which trucks came in, let alone individual females that I have no interest in. But I'll tell ya. She sure is purty, so I think if I'd seen her in here, I'd have remembered that. So if ya nailed my ass to a wall, I'd have ta say that she ain't been here. But if she had, Chester here would have seen her."

As he stepped back over to where he was working, my blood started to boil. "That bitch took my beer money and went off to do something stupid with it. She's probably off buying some damned clothes or something," I hissed.

"Spare the rod and spoil the wife," laughed Reb. "But while we're here, we may as well buy some beer, brother in law. And look at it this way. Since she's obviously fucked up big time this time, it'll make it easier for you to tell her that Tammy is moving into your bed and she's moving out to the couch."

"There is that," I agreed.

* * * * * *

Victoria

I woke up tired and confused. I looked around me and realized that I was lying on a very soft, very comfortable bed. Except for a very dry mouth and some ringing in my ears, I felt better than I'd felt in a long time. Then, of course, the stinging in my face started up and I remembered Zeke slapping me that morning. I looked around and there were no windows in the room. I wondered what time it was.

"Zeke is going to have my ass," I thought. I tried to estimate how long I'd been gone. I knew that I'd been asleep for a while. I looked around the room. The first thing I saw was a huge flat screen TV mounted to a wall. I wished that I was going to be here long enough to watch that TV. We only had a tiny little TV at home and I only got to watch it when Zeke let me. Most of the time he watched NASCAR, Swamp People, fishing shows, sports and porn.

I looked to the other side of the room and saw a closet that was nearly bursting with clothes. There were lots of beautiful dresses and jackets and blouses. I realized then that some really lucky bitch lived in this room and they'd probably brought ME here to recover from whatever it was that knocked me out. I tried to remember but it was fuzzy.

I put one leg down on the floor and tried to stand up. Everything started spinning. That was when I saw him. I sat back down on the bed and looked at him. He looked up from whatever the thing he held in his hands was.

As his eyes focused on me, I saw his face. He was a really handsome man with very kind eyes. Some of those pretty guys are so stuck up and so full of shit that it shows through their eyeballs. Not this one. His eyes showed nothing but kindness mixed with a kind of sadness. He stood up and walked over to the bed. He looked at me and smiled. It was as if he was really happy to see me. As he scanned my face he noticed the bruise on the left side.

"Who hit you?" he asked sharply.

"Oh that'll be gone in a couple of days," I said. "My husband, Zeke, did it this morning. I guess I got a bit too lippy for him and..." I stopped talking when I noticed that the kindness coming from his eyes had disappeared. There was a darkness coming from his eyes that was scary.

"He'll never hit you again," he said calmly.

"I wish that was true," I laughed. "But speaking of which, I guess I should be heading for home now and..." The kindness had returned and he was shaking his head.

"Victoria, you are home," he said confidently. "And no one will ever hit you again. I swear it."

"Zeke hits me whenever he wants to," I said. "But he's my husband so he has the right to..."

"No one has the right to hit you and Zeke is no longer your husband. Victoria..." he hesitated. "This is really hard to say and I hope that you can understand it someday...I guess I'm hoping that over time you'll more than come to accept it...But you're mine now."

I started laughing my ass off. I figured it had to be some kind of joke. Zeke had to have set me up. Maybe it was one of those reality TV shows. I started looking around for hidden cameras, but I couldn't find any.

"Okay," I said. "I'll play along. How long does the joke last?"

"Forever, I hope," he said. I looked in his eyes and there was no trace of humor in them. There was also no trace of deception. This whacko really thought that I'd stay here. I got to my feet and tried to run past him on my still shaky legs. I got to the big metal door and couldn't open it. Shit, there was no handle on it to open it with.

"Let me the fuck out of here," I screamed. "Let me out of here, right God damned now. When Zeke hears about this he's gonna beat your pretty ass. He's probably looking for me right now."

He shook his head. "First off," he said "Zeke isn't actually looking for you. He waited for about three hours after you'd left and then he drove over to the seven eleven and bought his own beer. He did ask the clerk in the store about you but after that he just went home and started drinking. You've been gone for a full day now and he hasn't even called the police yet to report you missing." I was shocked.

I wasn't shocked that Zeke hadn't reported me missing. I was shocked that I'd been gone for a whole day.

"If Zeke knows what's good for him, he will never approach me," he said. "I might have to kill him for hitting you and..."

"Wait a minute," I said. "You think it's wrong for Zeke to hit me, but you'd kill him for doing it?"

He nodded. "You're mine now. No one can ever hurt you and I will never allow anyone to do it again."

"Uh, dude, this is the United States of America," I said. "We kind of got rid of slavery and ownership of people about a hundred and fifty years ago. No one can own anyone anymore."

"I don't know about that," he said. "From the second you opened those big pretty blue eyes, you owned me."

I got weak in the knees when he said that and it wasn't from whatever they'd knocked me out with.

"But you're wrong about that Victoria. Slavery isn't legal here but it goes on all of the time. There are thousands of European and Asian women shipped over here and sold into brothels every day in almost every state in the union. It's not..."

"Is that what I'm here for?" I screamed. "I won't do it. I'm not going to be anyone's whore. I'll kick the shit out of every guy you bring..."

He started laughing so hard I thought he was going to pee on himself.

"What's so God damned funny," I hissed.

"You're perfect," he laughed. "God, I wish I'd met you some other way. Victoria, I didn't go through all of this trouble and all of this expense to get a prostitute. And certainly not for one I'd give to other men. If you do have sex with anyone around here, it will only be with one person; ME."

I was shocked. I wondered why the hell he had gone through all of the trouble. He was a good looking man. He could probably get any number of women just by smiling at them. And judging from the looks of the place I was in, he had some money too. That meant even more women he could get.

"So let's have a little talk about how this works," he said.

"I have a better idea," I said. "For some reason you want me. So okay, I'm not going to argue with you. How about if I just give you some pussy and you let me go?"

He looked at me sadly then. His face was so sad that I almost wanted to cry myself.

"Well, I really wanted to start our relationship out the easy way," he said. "Victoria, I don't love you yet. I mean I've studied you. I know everything about you. That's why you like this room so much. It was designed based on things that you've said you liked. I hope that in time you come to at least like me too. But this really isn't about sex. And you're not going to just get out of here. We're going to be together for a long time."

I could tell he was serious. Then he did what I least expected. He must've pushed a secret switch or something because suddenly the huge metal door swung open. I bolted without a hint of warning. As I got closer to the door, I thought my hair stood up. I just felt a buzzing. I saw him shaking his head sadly.

"Later, pretty boy," I thought as my feet rocketed across the plush carpet. I wondered why he wasn't trying to stop me. As I approach the door the buzzing increased and it was around my neck. A few steps away from the open door and freedom, the buzzing became painful. It was like white hot agony coursing through my neck and shoulders. I screamed in pain and started writhing on the floor.

He walked over to me and bent down and picked me up. He calmly walked me back away from the door and the pain stopped.

"I'm sorry Victoria," he said. And for some reason, I could see that he really was.

"Can we talk now?" he asked. I nodded my head. My nerve endings were still on fire.

"Are you hungry?" he asked. "We could eat while we talk. I'm sure that you have lots of questions. What would you like to have?"

"What do you have?" I asked. I really was hungry and starving wouldn't improve my situation.

"Victoria, my job is to make you happy," he said smiling. "You can have anything you want."

"Then let me go," I said.

"Well, anything except that," he said.

"Can I have pizza?" I asked. He smiled and nodded. He stepped over to the wall and pressed a button. He spoke into and intercom and came back a few minutes later.

"We're having it delivered. It'll be twenty minutes. Why don't you put on something comfortable," he said.

"These are all the clothes I have," I said. "I do have a few more pieces back home but..." I stopped as he started laughing again.

"Victoria, this is your room," he said. "Everything thing in here is your size and was bought for you."

I got up and avoided the doorway. I looked through the closet and saw everything lined up and organized by color. I looked into a drawer and saw all kinds of lingerie and underwear. I saw everything from thongs to granny panties.

"Is that what you want me to do?" I asked, with my voice dripping contempt. "You want me to wear some sleazy lingerie and walk around with my titties hanging out so you can get your jollies?"

"Victoria, I just want you to be comfortable," he said. "You have lots of pajamas, even some like little kids wear with bunny ears and feet in them. Pick out whatever you want."