Beyond a Shadow

She looked at me concentrating hard. It was clear that she was running every possible consequence and nuance through her head.

Then, she giggled and said, "If I had to choose between being a murder victim, or your wife, I'm pretty sure I'd choose the latter." I think that was a joke.

That was my girl!!; practical, if not a little supernatural. If she was crazy, then so was I, and I didn't care about her origins. All I cared about was that the woman in front of me was a strong, vibrant and loving person, whose mere presence made my life better.

You might ask me how I could forget the circumstances of her sudden and mysterious appearance. It took willpower to CHOOSE to ignore the fact that Mavis's history began on a rainy night in November. But, I told myself that my former wife Janet, could be married to somebody, somewhere, right now; under exactly the same set of circumstances.

Like I said, I'm a cop. I believe the evidence. Mavis could be from seventy years in the past. I had nothing to prove or disprove that.

But what I DID know, was that THIS Mavis Pritchett was the woman I loved. Maybe I would have felt differently if Mavis wasn't such a stunningly attractive woman. But she was gorgeous. More important, I didn't have one iota of doubt about her love, her fidelity, or her genuine humanity; whatever her origins.

I know Mavis was as mystified by her past as I was. But, in the end it was simple pragmatism. We were making a future together, and that future was full of hope. Whatever had been in the past was gone, never to return, and that was good enough for both of us.

At first, Mavis was like a feral cat. She wouldn't go out of the house unless I was with her. But the more we lived our lives together, the more she became acclimated to rural Wisconsin in the 21st Century. I was gone a lot because of my job. So, she learned to drive and explore.

Mavis mostly lived in the library while I was working. She must have devoured whole shelves of books; trying to fill in the time between her last memories and now. I tried to get her to use a computer. But, she said she didn't trust the things. In some ways she might have been more prescient than every other member of our present society.

We were married eight months after I closed the case. Mavis was a perfect wife and mother. As time went by, the sex got even wilder; if that was even possible. There was no doubt in either of our minds that this was a lifetime marriage ...

By the way, did I say "mother?"

Mavis announced that she was pregnant, two months BEFORE the wedding. Modern contraception technology was one of the things that she had yet to master. As a result, my little Ava was born "premature" seven months after we stepped to the alter.

If I thought I loved Mavis, I had no way of anticipating how much I loved my little girl. Things just got better and better as my Ava prospered and grew.

*****

Deer hunting season in Wisconsin is more eagerly anticipated than Thanksgiving. For a week in the middle of November; most of the population is out in the woods. Since there are so many people tramping around, they occasionally stumble on things. It might be Sasquatch, or a gold nugget, or a wooly mammoth tusk, or a long-lost cell phone. Occasionally, it's the remains of a fellow citizen.

Mavis and I had been married for nine fabulous years, when the Sheriff in neighboring Chippewa County called. It seems, several of the local boys had been drinking all day and then gotten the bright idea of trying their luck in the Nicolet Forest. The only flaw in that brilliant scheme was that Nicolet's a National Preserve and hunting there is a Federal offense.

The cops quuckly bagged them; mainly because most were passed out by that point. But, while the deputies were rounding them up, the rain started coming down in buckets, and the downpour exposed a bone.

The Sheriff did a little digging and found a skeleton. Since those bones could be from any era; Native American, to the present, they were sent down to Madison to be forensically examined.

Ultimately, the Sheriff's people called me. That was because nine years previously I had set a flag in the CIB database requesting information about any missing women in that vicinity. The skeleton was female, and it fit my RFI.

My heart stopped. Every day with Mavis was like living in an earthquake zone. Even if the consciousness wasn't there; you were still subliminally aware that absolute disaster could strike at any moment. It just took that first tremor to bubble the awareness to the surface.

I told the guy in Chippewa County to transfer the jurisdiction to me, since it was my case. He was more than happy to get a chore off his desk. I, on the other hand, feared the outcome of the forensic exam.

I was filling out the paperwork to make the transfer when Charlene called to tell me that Ava hadn't been picked up at school. It was 4:00 in the afternoon. There was no way Mavis would miss that.

I don't know about other people. But, I get mice on my spine when I am in the grip of mortal terror. I could be standing there looking as stoic as Mr. Rushmore. But ripples of cold disorienting fear run up and down my back.

I walked out of the office like a zombie, brushed past Char and out the door. I got in my cruiser and drove to the local elementary school. The skies were dark, and the rain was just starting. I stifled the thought that the rain was coming down just as heavily on the night I first encountered Mavis.

Ava was standing at the curb. She was in her wellies and slicker. She looked like a tiny carbon copy of her mother. Ava was worried. Even minor bumps in a child's life are magnified by a departure from routine. She was being minded by the Assistant Principal who had called me.

I thanked the woman, loaded Ava in the car and drove home. The shivers had intensified to the point where I was almost shaking. The fact that I had to be strong for my little girl was the only thing keeping me on the rails.

I walked Ava in the house and took off her rain things. The house had that empty feeling. Ava said apprehensively, "Where's mommy." She was sensing something too. There was a melodramatic crash of rolling thunder. I thought, "Seriously??!!"

I said with fake reassurance, "Oh, she's probably grocery shopping. Why don't you go in your room and start your homework?"

She said cagily, "Can I play Angry Birds first?" Her innocence was about to be ripped from her. So, I thought, "Why not?"

I said, "You can play it for as long as you want sweetie."

She threw her little pipe-stem arms around my neck, hugged me and said, "I love you daddy!"

I hugged her back desperately, and said, "I love you too Pumpkin." I was going to need her in the months and years ahead.

EPILOGUE

For one solid year, the search for Mavis was my Department's ONLY investigative priority. I used every contact with every Sheriff in every State. I also made it clear to Barnestaple that the FBI wouldn't like the publicity, if he didn't mobilize every national and international asset to find her.

Mavis had left no footprints, physical, or electronic; and there were no reports of mysterious sightings. She seemed to have just vanished from our kitchen, one afternoon on a rainy November day.

I never knew what happened. The thing that led her into my life might have toggled, and set her off on a new delusion. Or, she might have fallen down a well. She might have run off with Ramon the pool boy. Or she might have just decided to see the U.S.A. in her Chevrolet. Whatever the reason, she utterly disappeared. I finally had to accept that she was gone for good.

It would be a vast understatement to say that I was heartbroken. But the thing about shielding a vulnerable little girl is that, you discover that you have internal strength that you never thought existed.

I poured every ounce of my soul into helping Ava through the loss, and oddly enough that little bit of selflessness saved me too.

It never got better. But I discovered I could shoulder the burden and continue to trudge on through life. Who needs sleep anyhow!!

Ava got over it much quicker and more completely than I did. But she was a kid. She missed her mom terribly. But the future held the distractions of growing up; from dance recitals to senior proms. To say the least, her old man was proud of her. Her mother would have been too.

At twenty, Ava is the same incredible beauty that her mother was. Just like Mavis, she is smart, strong-minded and accomplished.

Penny Jenson, Jake Jenson's school-teacher wife, took Ava under her wing from the moment Mavis disappeared. And my Ava grew from a little girl, performing in a pack of other little girls, to her current role as the principal dancer for Eau Claire's Nutcracker. Penny got Ava a full-ride in Madison's dance program, and you can see my little girl on the sidelines every time the Badgers play.

A month after my world ended, the forensic results came back from Madison. The skeleton had been in the ground for sixty to ninety years; and it was indeed a female, age approximately 25.

The cause of death was clear and unambiguously convincing. The hyoid bone was destroyed. It would take a lot of rage to cause that degree of damage. So, the coroner's ruling was murder by strangulation. The victim was listed as unknown, as were the circumstances and the perpetrator.

I still don't believe in the supernatural. But my Mavis DID mysteriously appear at that exact spot in the Nicolet Forest. And we DID solve the 1946 murder of an individual named Mavis Pritchett. In the process of which, we also caused the death of the murderer. It was justice. But it left me with nothing.

I had the skeleton shipped directly to me. I paid for the transport and burial myself. That's because this was personal. I pulled a few strings with the Board of Commissioners, to be allowed to bury her near my house. It was a beautiful little plot on a low hill above the Millpond.

It would be easy for me to do my nightly pilgrimage to her grave. I'd bring her some flowers and just sit and talk, tell her about my day. The weather's nasty in the winter. But, I never missed a visit.. Those visits kept me marching forward into the ethereal yonder.

Her final resting place was at the base of a big spreading willow. The grave marker had a marble angel. It said, "Mavis Pritchett, born 1921, died 1946: Beloved by her Husband and Daughter. We will be reunited on the other side."

The interment was in late May. It was just me and the Lutheran Pastor. Nobody among my friends and acquaintances could understand why I was wasting my money; or making such a big fuss, about the remains of an anonymous murder victim. I couldn't explain it to them. They'd think I was nuts.

The sun was bright and warm, the weather was mild, and the smell of spring presaged the summer to come. The willow had gotten its leaves and it swayed gently above us, in the soft breeze.

I had told the Parson to say the words, like this unknown woman was my wife. His eyes told me what he was thinking, "You mean the one who ran off and left you with a kid to raise."

I really didn't give a shit what he thought. In fact, I didn't give a shit about ANYTHING. I just wanted to see my one true love properly situated for eternity.

And yes, maybe I DO believe a little bit, now.

I bowed my head on that lonely hill, as the Pastor recited the Lord's Prayer. I was holding my little girl. She was crying on my shoulder. Her black hair, bright blue eyes and the resemblance to her mom was both heartbreaking and hopeful. I knew that raising her would be the rock on which I could rebuild my life.

Then I sensed somebody standing next to me. A powerful hand gripped my arm. I looked into the kind and sympathetic eyes of the Doc. His beautiful wife was standing next to him; wearing a black dress and a veil, head bowed in prayer. Penny Jensen and her greyhound husband were lined up next to them; heads also bowed, both in black.

The statement was unmistakable. Nothing need be said. I would never forget.

The Minister finished his prayer. We all said "Amen!" Then we each silently dropped a handful of dirt on the casket. I knew that Mavis would be happy there. She always liked watching the ducks.