Blind, Deaf & Dumb for Erections Ch. 01

Now, watching his wife having sex with yet another man, he felt compelled to do something other than to just sit there and watch her sucking, fucking, and making love to someone other than him. As if masturbation was his chosen, perverse, secret fetish to do, sadly his only self-abuse duty left for him to do, while watching his wife sucking and fucking, he reluctantly unzipped himself, pulled out his cock, and fondled and stroked his cock outside of his pants in the dark. In the hopes of receiving some sort of sexual satisfaction by masturbating while watching other men going at his wife in the way that he used to go at her, he wanted to cum. But too jealous, hurt, and too impotently angry, most times he couldn't cum.

Instead of feeling like the macho man he once was or the swinger that he prefers to think he is now in sharing his wife, he more felt much like the pervert that he's become in allowing his wife to be so sexually used and abused by other men while he watches them in seething silence. More than that, it's one thing for his wife and for strangers to know that he's impotent but he didn't want his friends, neighbors, and co-workers, especially his construction crew of employees, to know that he's impotent. The boss man unable to get it up is not a good thing in his business.

He could just hear the whispers and the laughter behind his back. He didn't want anyone to know that he was no longer a man, a man's man, a manly man, and a macho man. He'd be so embarrassed if anyone he knows knew that he could no longer get an erection enough to sexually satisfy his wife, especially when having a wife who looks like her.

When sitting out on the sidewalk on their coffee breaks and lunch break with the men he employed, they always talked about doing other women. Whether movie stars or strangers, it was always the same stupid but sexually driven and erotically exciting talk. In the way that the guys joked around about wanting to bang this passing woman and wishing that passing woman would suck them, his friends knowing his personal penis problems would take all the fun out of his sexy, women watching games. Yet nonetheless his personal penis plight, he wondered how many other man had his problem.

* * * * *

Sworn to secrecy not to discuss what happens behind his closed, bedroom door, Mike, his best friend, was in bed with Natalie. While Mike was upstairs fucking his wife and his wife was sucking Mike, Jim could have waited downstairs while watching TV. He could have gone for a drive and returned home after they did their thing but he has more of a chance getting hard while watching someone else giving his wife hot sex. Only, knowing what was going on in his bedroom, he didn't want to watch TV or go for a drive. Needing to see, he wanted to stay there to watch.

He has more of a chance of cumming when watching his wife sucking someone else's cock and being fucked by another man. Besides, not only did he want to stay there to see, he needed to be there to watch. As if he had any chance of stopping that, staying with them in the room was his fruitless way to make sure that his wife didn't fall in love with someone else. Screwy logic at best, staying with her in the room somehow made him still feel connected to her and that he shared something that he could no longer do with her by allowing another man to do what he could no longer do.

With the increasingly wide gap that his impotency distanced himself from his wife's sexual emotions, the only thing that could bridge that gap was for him getting a hard enough erection to make love to her, to fuck her, and to satisfy her sexually. In the angry way that he felt now, he wished he could take her anally and give her the fucking that she needed to have for him to feel that he controlled her again, even though he now realized that he never did. Moreover, with him needing to be there, he didn't want them bonding more than they already were bonding when humping and sweating while in the throes of having passionate sex. It was one thing for another man to have sex with his wife but he didn't want another man to possess his wife in the way that he thought he did. It was one thing for his wife to have sex with another man but that was where he wanted their connection to end.

Afraid of losing her, he didn't want his wife to fall in love with another man. He didn't want them talking any more than they were talking now while having sex. He didn't want them having their little, sexual secrets that he once had with her. Wanting their sex to be as impersonal as possible and without even pillow talk, he didn't want them laughing and sharing private jokes.

He didn't want them professing their love for one another while he was downstairs watching TV or in his car driving around the neighborhood. It was one thing for them to be physically close but he didn't want them to be emotionally close too. Not so bad, actually, what worked for her agreeing to have sex with other men worked for him too for a while, that is, so long she doesn't broach the boundaries of their open marriage arrangement by falling in love.

To be continued...