Christian College Sex Comedy Ch. 02

Now all movement stopped; even the normally homicidal Heaven was caught up in the imagery (which she liked) and the other girls were wrapping their minds around the implications of either me on my knees, Heaven in leather, or us together.

"You have a very sinful mind," accused Faith.

"I have never denied that," I responded. "I'm a flawed creature in need of redemption – I admit that. Thankfully, I've chosen a religion based on forgiveness and second chances, then, eh?"

Any further comments were interrupted by a girl running into me – more like almost running over me.

"Zane! They didn't transsubstantiate you into communion wafers," Rio squealed, showing more womanly affection than I would have given her credit for.

Rio didn't do a great job of being 'surprised' when she noticed the girls around me. Heaven glared at Rio and I tried to shift myself between them but Christina intervened before anything happened.

"Felon, I am in need of a stool to sit on; I'm tired," Christina said. As she used the word 'felon,' she smirked at me. Rio flinched too.

"Wouldn't you rather have me lie on my back so you can sit on my face so I can get you off? That way we could both eat lunch," Rio sneered back. Christina didn't bite.

"Make a seat, little felon," Christina smiled. I had a sudden desire to miss lunch.

"I've got this, Zane," Rio told me as she touched my upper arm and pushed me toward the door.

As I grudgingly walked away, I saw Rio get down on all fours on the grass and Christina take her seat. The best thing I could say about the situation was that Queen Christina didn't bounce up and down.

Before I could come up with some rescue strategy, Iona corralled me and led me to the Handmaiden Mistress of the moment; Dove.

Dove's food had grown cold and Iona had kept assuring her I was on my way so I set to my latest exercise in humility. Dove expected me to sit with her. I brushed her shoulder-length auburn hair aside and fed her mouthful after mouthful, using a napkin to tantalize her lips after every few bites, which Dove found enticing and the surrounding tables found romantic. I was getting the feeling that the girls were looking at this whole Handmaiden thing differently than I was.

At three o'clock I made it to Soccer tryouts, forgetting one little gigantic complication – this was Christina's team. She and the coach decided that since they couldn't outright deny me the chance for a place on the team, they could make me target practice (aka goalie). I blocked eleven shots from established members of the team (they have Soccer/Football in Thailand) but number twelve got past me – I was off the team.

At four came Archery tryouts and I was starting to feel the weight of being the true outsider here, and it got worse when I saw our Team Captain was Chastity Adams, aka Chastity of Team Christina. I turned to put my equipment up when Chastity called me over.

"What are you doing, Zane?"

"I've just finished having Christina use me as a crash test dummy," I admitted. "I figured I'd save us both some time so that you could concentrate your efforts on people who might actually have a chance to be on the team."

"Zane, why don't you think I'd give you a chance?" Chastity asked quietly.

"Will you give me a chance?" I wondered.

"Not if you quit right now," she pointed out.

So, I gave it a shot and I leaned that I sucked at archery, but clearly not as bad as most of the other girls so Chastity tapped me as a competitive alternate, which meant I was to carry equipment and practice a lot – the newbie.

"Why did you do this, let me on the team?" I inquired after the team announcements.

"You aren't half bad," she explained, then smiled and pointed out, "plus you will distract the other all-female teams."

"Thanks for the chance, Chastity," I said as I shook her hand.

"You are good-looking and funny, Zane, and the other girls will work harder so they can stick around you," she responded while looking at me intently. "Now go, you have another team to try out for." Sometimes I needed to be reminded that there are things a twenty-one-year-old could teach an eighteen-year-old.

I barely made it to Karate tryouts (Marksmanship and Orientation were on Tuesdays and Thursdays). I didn't recognize our Team Leader but our coach was Dana Gorman, Head of Security. She eyed me with suspicion but it was nothing compared to the looks I got from the Team Sub-captain. I thought I recognized the face but I definitely recognized her ass and the hair weave – I'd put a foot in it when I kicked her off Rio – yeah me!

I told them I knew some kick-boxing but Dana was not impressed so I was placed with the beginners group, which I proceeded to dominate utterly. Ten minutes of that and the Team Captain Wilhelmina Spellman put me in the second tier, where I went undefeated in our little sparing matches yet again.

Willie wanted to put me on the first team but the girl whose ass I'd kicked vocally opposed her on it. Willie relented but only partially. After class, the sub-captain would judge my performance and get the final say if I was first-team material. I figured if I ripped out her still-beating heart and showed it to her, I had a fifty-fifty chance of making the squad.

We squared off after the last girl left – the sub-Captain didn't want any witnesses. She was more skilled and had more emotional investment but I'd actually been in some real fights and was faster and stronger. As far as matches went, it was pretty intense. We went back and forth with no real advantage until she threw me by grabbing and tearing off my gi.

Before she could capitalize I got in a kick to her gut and when she unfolded, I head-butted her, causing her nose to bleed. I pulled up and she rubbed her nose and looked at the blood.

"Oh, God, I'm sorry. Let me go get someone," I urged.

"You hurt me," she muttered. "Lord Jesus Christ, you hurt me," she said angrily as I stepped forward. I was so overwhelmed with human compassion I didn't see the kick coming.

I was dreaming of running errands to a close village which was something I got away with from time to time. It was a pleasant day if a little cold for daytime in the Thai uplands. The young widow I spent some time with was attending me and I was clearly lying back and enjoying some of our intimate foreplay. Her mouth felt warm and comforting on my little helmet, her tongue didn't twirl like it normally did...but I wasn't in Thailand anymore either.

My jaw hurt but that was far less relevant than the pressure of the body I was feeling on my thighs, the warm, wet sensation around my cock, and the feel of hands on my shaft and stomach. I propped myself up and looked down at my crotch were our sub-captain looked up at me while keeping her bobbing rhythm going.

"Stop," I ordered her. She reluctantly agreed, her eyes warring with anger, shame, and lust. I imagine she was wondering about what kind of academic hell I was about to bring down on her or if she could get away with crying rape as she pushed herself back and rested on her haunches.

"Take off your clothes," I ordered next. That command staggered her but my gaze fixed her in place.

"What are you going to do to me?" she said with a shaky voice.

"I'm going to reciprocate what you've been doing to me. You gave me a great lesson and I want to return the favor – now strip." She thought about it a moment, then did a quick striptease which brought me to my knees.

"What's your name?" I inquired as she finished.

"Cappadocia Davis," she murmured as she met me at knee level. I started kissing her, drifting into chest contact and letting our hands roam free for several minutes. Cappy had a very passive-aggressive style and often mirrored what I did, all the signals of a confident virgin.

Getting us down head to crotch took little effort as Cappy went back to administering her blowjob and I started working over her own sexual center. She only asked me to hurry once when I was spending time getting to know her thighs with delicate kisses. Though it was a bit rough, Cappadocia worked me furiously with strong hands, plump lips, and a fighter's stamina. On my end, I did all I could. I mapped out the pleasure lines along her thighs, across the groin, and farther along the stomach and sides, passing the breasts to the throat, ears and lips. Cappadocia expected a quick fuck and an equally quick departure. As it was, we missed dinner and I would almost be late for my room meeting.

Before then, I explored Cappy fully. I kissed every ebony inch of her, from kneecap to navel; I took gentle tongue strokes to her lips, vagina, and especially the clit while not forgetting a little tantalization of her ass which drove her over the top to an orgasm by itself. Cappy was good enough to take my seed not once, but twice, though the first time she took most of it on her face.

I sat there with two fingers stretching her lips apart while my tongue languidly worked on her labia and clitoris. I tickled the clit, sucking it with my lips, then blowing on it coolly. She learned how to swirl with her tongue once my cock was inside her mouth for a stronger sensation. Cappadocia liked a contest and we had the best of kinds; neither side won and a rematch was in order – definitely.

"Cappadocia," I began as I was getting my outdoor clothes on, "I don't think I'm ready for first team yet."

"Neither do I," she responded after a few moments of thought.

"I'd like to keep training for it, though. I'm not going to give up trying, no matter how many private sessions it takes."

"I have to agree, Zane. You are not yet ready and it is going to take a whole lot of private lessons to get you into 'first team' shape," she nodded. I left with a sore jaw but thinking good thoughts. I'd made two teams and had a shot at two others, as long as no one shot me or sent me to get lost in the wilds with a false map.

The Solarium (Why am I Living in a Glass House?)

I raced across campus to my dorm only to discover a sad looking girl in a short terry cloth robe sitting on the outside steps with a half-full trash bag. She perked up when she saw me.

"Zane," she hailed me, "I want you to take out my trash." Okay, that seemed kind of lame to me because the dumpster was thirty feet away so I had to think quickly.

"Ummm..." I looked her over.

"Jolene," she provided.

"Jolene, this doesn't seem quite fair," I pointed out, and I watched her deflate before me. "See," I said as I took her bag of trash and headed for the dumpster, her tagging along, "maybe I should come by your place tonight around nine thirty and clean up your room for you. Does that sound like a more appropriate Handmaiden's duty?" The little lights went off in her eyes.

"Yes," she bobbed her head. "Yes, it sounds...amazing." Without telling me her room number, she skipped off through the doors and went off to do God knows what. I went looking for Iona who, as I guessed, hooked me up with the girl's location. Gliding into my room after that was less satisfying.

"You are late, Mr. Braxton," Ms. Goodswell informed me.

"Handmaiden's Duty," I countered.

"We've moved all your furniture to the Solarium on the top floor," Dana rumbled. Solarium – top floor. Wasn't I on the top floor already? What was I getting into? That wasn't the most important thing at the moment, though.

Rio sat on her bed, knees up, hugging a pillow and looking decidedly unhappy at the world. I turned to the two teachers and asked them for a minute with my old roomie. Dana grumbled but Virginia made her give us the space.

"What's up, Rio?" I asked as I sat down at the foot of the bed. I knew what was wrong; I was abandoning her and I was not the first guy to do so. The only problem was, I wasn't those other guys.

"Nothing's up, asshole," she shot back. "I'm looking forward to not having you snore all night long. Plus, I'll be able to shower whenever I want," she sniffled.

"Oh, well, dealing with you has been a total pain in my ass too, Rio. It will be a relief to not have to wake up looking at you, your tattoos and all those body piercings," I stated evenly.

"Hey, I don't have any piercings anymore," she pouted, hurt by the comment and its accuracy.

"Well, I don't believe you, Rio. Sometime you will have to come up to the Solarium and show me just how wrong I am. I'll leave out a sleeping bag in case your city-bred ass gets lost and you can't figure out how to get back down after dark," I joked.

"Zane, if they find you sleeping with a girl, you'll get expelled," Rio whispered.

"Thank God you are not a girl, then, ya freak," I grinned so she hit me with her pillow. Rio was sneering at me playfully as I left; we were still friends.

Outside my room, I'd picked up an old friend, Barbie Lynn Masters, and with Virginia, Dana, and Iona, we trekked to the fifth floor, then up to the roof.

Now, when they were designing this kind of dorm in the 1970s, the architect was on a 'Retro Victorian' kick. He envisioned a safe green haven for the girls to go to where they would be free to partake of nature's bounty without risking pesky urban menaces like rapists, thieves, and murderers.

The Christian Elders liked the design so much, they transplanted it to the Virginia countryside. Of course, there aren't a lot of muggers in rural areas so the roof escapes weren't totally necessary or welcome by the student body and when the school built its twelve-foot-tall brick wall with security cameras around the entire facility, the need evaporated. Soon, all the Solariums were abandoned, the plants died, and not all the window panes were replaced.

It was a pretty freaking miserable place at first glance and there was some suspicion that this was an indirect way to drive me out. But they clearly had avoided the Developing World and my long experience in it when thinking this through. I loved it. I had roughly eighty percent of the dorm building's floor space to play with. It would be a lot of work to fix it but I had been accidentally supplied with a ready and willing work force.

Thank you, freshmen and Handmaiden's Duty, because amongst its other virtues, the Solarium was my room, and a freshman in a dorm room was immune to being summoned for Handmaiden Duty while in any such room unless required by a duty to go there. All I had to do was have Iona get the word out to our fellow freshman that my room was sanctuary and I was set.

All that was tomorrow; tonight, I had a cold room with squirrels, maybe a raccoon or two, birds, spiders, roaches, and an assortment of other pests, plus my bed, dresser, and a wardrobe from the drama department. I had also secured the choice time of five forty-five to six as my bathroom time in the morning, and ten to ten-fifteen in the evening. How I would actually piss during the day was swept under the rug. Ms. Goodswell suggested I get a hall pass during class periods for safety's sake. College...hall pass...Did they think I should make up for missing high school?

It was lights out in my domicile. The moon was waning and the sky was clear when I heard someone working the lock to my door at the bottom of the stairs. Five people had keys: I was one, Dana Gorman was another, Virginia Goodswell, and Chancellor Bass were two others, but none of them, I suspected. I spotted the faint moonlight playing across golden locks as my intruder drew close.

"Hey," Barbie Lynn whispered as she came to a stop by my bed. "I thought you might get cold so I brought you a quilt from storage."

"You are a life-saver, Barbie; I'm freezing in here. Why don't you put the quilt over me and climb in so it will warm up here faster and we can both get to sleep sooner," I responded softly. It was a weak lie but it was really all Barbie needed; it was late summer in Virginia, after all.

She spread out the quilt and started to get in.

"Wait, you'll get your skirt wrinkled," I cautioned her before she sat down. She nodded and stripped out of it, then completed the process by stripping off her shirt (no bra), socks, and shoes. As she snuggled up against me, she realized I was naked.

"Oh, that doesn't seem fair," Barbie giggled, so she wiggled around under the covers and tossed out her undies. "That's better." I pulled her into my arms and I caught her stealing glances up at me as she pressed her hands against my chest.

"We have all night," I assured her, and that earned me a kiss. "Oh, and I have your missing panties in my book bag, courtesy of Rio."

I returned her kiss and soon we were wrapped around one another, engrossed in one another's erogenous zones (ear lobes, nipples, lips, and throats) as well as tempting fate with a little penal/vaginal contact.

After she wrestled me against the headboard and took my member deep into her mouth we had a little session of 'try doing this and watch him squirm' until I finally lost control and erupted several times into her mouth.

"Mmmm..." Barbie Lynn murmured as she rolled some semen over her tongue, eyes lighting up as I smiled at her talent. "Jesus bless me, you taste nearly as good as you look. I want more!"

"Next time we can swap cum," I suggested to her. Barbie wrinkled her nose.

"Doesn't that make you a homo?" she questioned. I forgave her ignorance due to cuteness.

"You've tasted your juices on my lips but you are not a lesbian," I pointed out. After a moment she nodded so I continued with, "all I want to do is taste it on your tongue, not someone else's on my tongue." Telling her I'd given more than one blowjob didn't appear to be helpful at this time; I'm decidedly not heterosexual.

"Oh...you're pretty smart for someone so young," she smiled seductively. I cupped her face in one hand.

"I may be young and smart, but you are far more beautiful – breathtakingly beautiful – than me and one heck of a teacher because you keep me wanting to learn more," I heartily complimented her.

I must have struck a chord because Barbie Lynn glowed from the inside out and virtually poured like tanned molten gold into my lap.

"Fuck me," she begged with sensual need.

"What about your Pledge?" I questioned.

"Fuck my ass," she moaned, "it's not really cheating." Yeah, right.

"Okay, Barbie Lynn, but teaching you to like it isn't easy. I'm going to have to break you in all night long," I warned her, but all I got was a violent trembling of anticipation which caused her to make my lap damp and my cock rebound to duty.

We kissed deeply and with longing for over a minute, Barbie rocking in my lap, her labia brushing my cockhead.

"Is it going to hurt?" she panted into my lips.

"Yes. The first time you are going to scream, but I promise you I'll show you how good it can be," I assured her. She gulped in fear but smiled with wanton lust in her eyes.

I played with her pussy and my cock, doing tiny penetrations until Barbie lost it in a screaming, ear-splitting orgasm, "God loves me, God loves me, God Loves ME!!!!" She followed that up by collapsing against me and burying my face in her ample bosom. I couldn't help myself; I took an overly sensitive nipple into my lips.

"Oh, oh, oh, baby...that hurts; that hur-..." she whispered hoarsely until I relented. That didn't stop her from hugging me tightly to her chest though.

"Barbie Lynn, go over to my kit and get the Vaseline," I ordered her after a bit.

"Why do I have to do it?" she teased me.

"I love to watch your ass wiggle when you leave and the way your bare breasts bounce when you come back," I confessed. Once more she came on with this deep kiss and a winning smile, then she did as I asked and the view was definitely as delicious as I'd hoped.

She quickly resumed her position over me, shimmying to the point I was afraid I'd actually press my cock too far into her vagina.

Barbie was biting her lip while we played with her virginal fire; I knew I had to do something and that was to pop the top of the lubricant and rub two fingers deep into her back door.