Congi Len 02

Congi Len 02

"Hi."

[Oh, they just dip into their pockets now without being asked a crumbled $10 bill then?]

"[Stuffs crumbled $10 bill into rear deposit slot pocket] I mean, I appreciate you, Danny, I mean, are you going up to the press conference at the "Peep & Pull" adult bookstore tomorrow, hmm? Suzie, I mean, Congi Sia Lia Mia promises to drop another bombshell, so?"

"I mean, Congi Len, are you going to judge me for ducking inside of a peeping booth, huh? I mean, these are modern times and your half-brother, Congi Que, really has the place sweetened up and it's mainstream now, so?"

"Oh, no judgement at all, Danny and it's healthy for you to, you know, tee he, lose a little weight while visiting a peeping booth, I mean, can I have another crumbled up $10 bill because I'm dying for a red, red, blue Swirled Frozen Double Twist later tonight and you can make your best seduction on me tomorrow at the press release conference to be your peeping booth date, I mean, your peeping booth viewing partner, which I will refuse, of course, but then we can do things your way, I mean, as long as it's my way, so?"

[There are a lot of crumbled $10 bills in the city of Middleton. Well, Congi Len has most of them now.]

"[Hands off the other crumbled $10 bill] I mean, what's your way then, Congi Len, huh?"

"Does it matter, Danny? I'm skating claim to one of your press release nuts, so?"

"Wait, Congi Len, did you just say that I can..."

"You can mingle around afterwards, Danny. And by the way, I'm still in the creative, yet experimental phase of sex, so? Can I have yet another crumbled up $10 bill, Danny?"

[See? Congi Len has most of crumbled $10 bills]

"Thank you, Danny. You're definitely my favorite mark, I mean, my favorite guy on the Strip."

I mean, I have it in my head that there can be a heated moment and the only time available is to loosen the Denim shorts and provide a space for my boyfriend to, um, rise up and then lower all down in there, I mean, I don't know, it's just a thought.

"Here, take this, Congi Len."

[See, they just hand them off now without Congi Len asking]

"Thank you, Jay, I was looking forward to a tan, tan, red Tipped Frozen Swirly Twist tonight. And I know you're going to the press conference tomorrow, right, Jay?"

"I mean, I mean, I mean..."

"Well, the princess Congi boy will be there alright, but Congi Bar has a plateful these days, so?"

"No, no, I want you and I want to play fair and I want it tonight, Congi Len, so?"

Press the brakes! [Tranny math, tranny math, tranny math, ah-hah!]

If my calculations are correct, Jay just said that he would service me, which would make me an official, an official, I say, Trap and that would put me one up on the entire test tube Congi clan and that's what I want!

But Jay is a guy, right? He'll trick me into going first and then he'll pass out! Ah-hah! Guys be tricky. And they always pass out, so.

"Ahem and the truth then, Jay, hmm?"

[Well, what the hell? Jay just grumbles with another crumbled up $10 bill and then just walks away with his head down? Ah-hah!]

"Billy, I'm short a crumbled up $10 bill and the Back Twist Tipped Frosty Shop has a sale, so?"

[Huh, maybe there a few crumbled $10 bills left over]

"I want what Timmy got, Congi Len and I know it's your favorite thing, so?"

[Damn, what a time to not being able to start out with a "slurp" sound!]

"Give me another crumbled $10 bill, Billy, half seduce me at the press conference tomorrow and then pressure me into a Monday evening TV watch dinner date, okay?"

"[The crumbled bills keep coming] Really? Will you wear a bra for me, Congi Len?"

[Again, damn, what a time to not being able to start out with a "slurp" sound! Nobody ever asked for that before! But I wasn't planning on going that far. Topless, sure, but a bra? Maybe.]

"[The crumbled bills keep coming] and can I slip a couple of times, huh? I'll try to keep things in check, tee he, so?"

[Who needs a "slurp" sound when it's time to walk away from yet another horny guy trick, right? Slip a couple of times, hah! No way! Not yet anyways.]

"Three slips, no more than four times and my safe word is "OMFG Billy, pull it out!", okay?"

[What? I thought this was a chapter about Congi Len! The between the buns hot dog style sex freak!]

Well, sooner or later, I'm going to cave in anyways and go all the way and Billy has always been nice to me, but it actually has to happen first since I can be tricky too.

[Double Back Twisted Frosty Swirl Shop front door chime jingle, jangle]

"Eek! Congi Len! I just found out that Congi Que is hiring me to develop the logo graphics for the modern "Peep & Pull" adult bookstore fashion line of t-shirts and jackets, Congi Len, I mean, eek, isn't that exciting for me, hmm, eek?"

"[Ahh, finally, slurp] oh, that is exciting, Franny. Can I have a $10 bill back for my change, hmm?"

"Oh, your drink is on the house, Congi Len because, eek, I get to see what all the fuss is about with all these men pulling themselves in your half-brothers peeping store and eek, I'm 19 now, so I can do that, eek! I mean, the logo has to state that the "Peep & Pull" adult bookstore is mainstream and modern, but without saying that guys just go all "fap, fap, fap" [nice hand motions, girl] in there, so, eek, I get to come up with a logo that says, eek, I'm a modern man and I jack off to peeping videos and I'm proud, eek, I'm so happy, Congi Len! Congi Len? Hello? Where did you go, Congi Len?"

Well, Franny will be going "eek" for the next two weeks, so.

"Oops. Where are you headed to, huh?"

"Oh, hey there, hey, Frank."

The first rule is to not get into a car with a guy. The second rule is do not say "hey there, hey" unless you're prepared to be a good date! And the third rule to never break rule 1 and rule 2 at the same time!

[Mwah, ummah, mwah, smooch, lip smack, lip lock, mwah, ah, rub, rub, mwah, ah, oops, ahh, ahh]

"Whew, I mean, Congi Len, I mean, Congi Len, since when do you make out in cars, huh? Not that I'm complaining!"

[Mwah, ummah, mwah, smooch, lip smack, lip lock, mwah, ah, rub, rub, mwah, ah, oops, ahh, ahh]

"Since like five minutes ago, Frank when I realized that a certain tingling feeling isn't indigestion all the time!"

[Mwah, ummah, mwah, smooch, lip smack, lip lock, mwah, ah, rub, rub, mwah, ah, oops, ahh, ahh]

"Whew, I'm banging you then, Congi Len, so?"

[Mwah, ummah, mwah, smooch, lip smack, lip lock, mwah, ah, rub, rub, mwah, ah, oops, ahh, ahh]

"You're getting your dick kissed a couple of times for tonight, Frank! And you're coming to the press release tomorrow!"

[Mwah, ummah, mwah, smooch, lip smack, lip lock, mwah, ah, rub, rub, mwah, ah, oops, ahh, ahh]

Huh! He didn't argue with any of that!

But I can argue that guys should have like a control valve on it because, OMG, dental issues cost a lot of money! I mean, blast, blast, blast, blast!

But I lived.

"Hi (swallow, gulp, clear throat, slurp), Bruce. Can I have a 10 spot for a Double Twist, Double Dipped Frozen Twist Back Frosty in a little bit, hmm?"

"[See? The crumbled up 10 spots just keep coming!] I mean, a couple of the guys, I mean, there's talk about some press conference tomorrow, Congi Len and I mean, the guys, right, they are pressuring me into going, you know, for the sandwich vending machine, so?"

"[Slurp] Bruce, if you want me to help guide you through things, I mean, just ask, but just you and not you know, "the guys" and all (slurp), so?"

"Wait a minute [stuffs another 10-spot into the night deposit slot], Congi Len, is this a trick, huh?"

"(Slurp) Bruce, I cannot enter a peeping booth with bookstore customer (slurp), but they somehow overlook Men's activity (slurp), so, just make sure you attend the press conference, bye!"

Hey, guys lie to me, like all the time, so lying back sometimes is fair play!

(Beep, beep)

I mean, circle back and see rule #1 above. Nope.

"[Leans into car window hooker style] oh, (slurp) hey there, hey, Vic! What's happening? And do you have an extra $10 bill on you so that I can try out the new Frozen Dipped, Twirl Twisted Frosty later tonight, hmm?"

[Huh, beat the rush and hand off three crumbled $10 bills then!]

[Also, see rule #2 above for not saying "hey there, hey" without meaning it]

"Straight up, Congi Len, Bobby and myself are looking to tag team your booty crack, the way you like it and we promise that there will be no slips and oops moments and for a couple of free tokens for the soda machine at the peeping store, I mean, we've always supported you, so?"

[Hm, fact checking. I am Congi Len and booty globe splitting sex is my thing, green check. Vic always has been neutral with me, green check. Bobby's hair is a weird color blonde, red check, but Bobby wasn't even there yet, so, yellow check. I am the rear globe sex machine, tee he, big green check! I did say "hey there, hey", so, ugh check. But guys lie about never slipping and missing, red, red check. I may or may not recently discovered that essential oils greatly enhance my sex thing, sky blue check. We need the attendance support at the Congi reveal press conference, green check. I mean, Vic did give me three crumbled up $10 bills from the start, I'm getting rich check. But I'm not as sexually active as I let on and I was with, um, what was his name, tee he, oh yeah, Frank, so that's actually my (ugh) monthly quota, fricking check and don't tell people I talk sex up more than I do it, please check here, check]

"(Slurp) I'm spoken for tonight, Vic, but I'll hook you up with a bunch of soda machine tokens tomorrow and I'll peek the monitor behind the front desk to make sure you're doing it right (slurp), so?"

I mean, is there really a wrong way to smack off?

"Really, Congi Len? Because I always suspected that I did it wrong, so, um, feel free to give me fed back and um, I mean, why don't you fall for my charms when your blog has you hot dogging twice a day, huh?"

[Fact checks. Oh, never mind]

"(Slurp) fine, Frank, I'm 75% a fraud, but I still do stuff!"

"Tee he, everybody knows that, Congi Len, but that's become a part of appeal. I mean, I'm not going to lie and ignore your booty, but tee he, we like you in fraud mode and nobody wants you to change. But I still want to role play that I catch you changing clothes some night, so?"

Well, hell then! Is that a thing? Is there a "Caught changing for Dummy's" book out there, hmm? Or is that just another trick? Ah-hah!

"Well, now I'm 75% seduced, Vic! Um, stop by unexpectantly this Thursday night and, um, can I have another crumbled up $10 bill, Vic? The Inverted Twist Tipped Frosty Freeze Shop has their grand opening tonight and um, just how close to needing a condom does role playing "caught with my shorts down" go, hmm?"

[Hands off another crumbled $10 bill with a "pretty damn close" smirk and vrooms away, vroom, vroom]

I mean, maybe I won't even notice the difference, right? LOL, I've a banana in my hands, so, oh yeah, the difference will be known!

"Congi Len! What are you doing?"

Oh, well, the store front windows on the Strip provide a reflection after dark and I was just checking out the best view for getting caught lowering my shorts, that's all. And it was just pretend! Mostly.

"(Slurp) William, can I have two crumbled up $10 bills because my membership at the Flipped Double Twist Frosty Swirl Shop is due, hmm? Also, William, if you were to burst into my bedroom and catch me changing out of my shorts and my shorts were about down to my knees, I mean (slurp), would you prefer a frontal catch, a side stance catch or a rear catch (slurp), hmm?"

"[Now they're handing off four at a time] Congi Len, what kind of question is that, huh? But a frontal catch might make me hesitate for a brief moment, a nice side catch would probably make my knees buckle a little bit and a rear catch is boom, so?"

"(Slurp) I get the frontal and rear thoughts, William, but circling back to your knees buckling from a perfectly practiced and perfected side view catch then (slurp), hmm?"

"What, is that a trick question, Congi Len? Check out 25% of your selfies. You have a pretty nice side silhouette, Congi Len, so?"

Well, it's nice to hear stuff sometimes and we all do it, so, shut it! And leave better comments on my side view selfies.

"(Slurp) William, can I have one more crumbled up $10 bill for a reserve Frozen Triple Twisted Swirl, hmm? And if you keep this to yourself, I mean, on the touch screen at the peeping booth bookstore, I mean, tap in 19CongiLen19 and have some fun with my naked silhouette then!"

"[Hands off yet another crumbled $10 bill] naked, Congi Len?"

"(Slurp) well, with a prefect angle because I know what guys like and what they care not to see, so."

"[OMG, hands off yet another crumbled $10 bill] I'm taking you for a midnight swim soon, Congi Len!"

Well, hells bells, that's sex! But, tee he, with built in lube, right? Tee he [oops, that's sex! Shakes head violently and almost messes up the Congi style hair]

"(Slurp) well, William, if we ever go that far and I scream and yell, I mean, that can't be known. Also, can I have another crumpled up $10 bill because the Frosty Reverse Tipped Freeze Shop is about to close."

"[I mean, they print $10 bills every day] Congi Len, I'm not going to purposely make it rough, but you will whimper! Now get before the Frozen Frosty Freeze Quad Tipped Shop closes."

Whimpering, right? A soft series of "waah, argh, ugh, waah, sniffle", right?

[The Frosty Swirled Frozen Twist Tipped Shop front door jingle, jangle]

"OMG, Congi Len, am I ever glad to see you because I'm so nervous about attending the press release conference at the peeping place tomorrow with the boyfriend! I mean, is it just rows and rows of guys waiting for peeping booth to open up so they whack their man meat then, hmm? I'm a nervous wreck, Congi Len, a nervous wreck!"

"(Slurp) Merri, it's not rows and rows of men waiting to whack off over "You Bent My Fender" videos! There is lounge area (slurp), so?"

"[Slides a blue, red, green Frosty Swirled Frozen Twist Tipped beverage across the counter] well, I'm still nervous about it anyways, but I committed, so."

"(Slurp) Congi Que needs a press conference hot mic handler for crowd questions, Merri, so?"

"Oh, like in slacks and a blouse then, Congi Len, hmm?"

"(Slurp) as long as slacks and a blouse are exactly the same as a game night teasing bodysuit, so?"

"Oh, um, that never happened, Congi Len! Well, it happened a little bit, but I swear, that little butthead, Sean, peeped into my bedroom when I was trying something on and I swear, it was a harmless "caught" moment and nothing more! And the bodysuit was all the way up anyways! I mean, it was so sheer that it didn't matter much, but I was innocent, Congi Len, innocent, I say!"

[Fact checking. I don't know. I never trusted Sean anyways and it never made sense that Merri just fell under his spells once she knew was caught and then they did it for six days straight, so, red check, Sean is a liar. But Merri probably rocks a sheer bodysuit, green check]

"(Slurp) Congi Que already ordered a couple of bodysuits for to wear, Merri and..."

"(Gulp) how sheer, Congi Len?"

"(Slurp) oh, reading the tag on your bra will be easy and..."

"(Giggles) well, I'm proud of that tag, so, eek, I'm in as the hot mic girl at the peeping store, eek!"

Well, a lot of girls go all "eek" and stuff when they are excited, right?

"(Slurp) even in front of the boyfriend, Merri, hmm?"

"Oh, you mean the boyfriend who is going to be going all "ugh, ugh, pull, pull, argh, argh" over some video titled "So, you say you're short on the rent this month, huh" or whatever. Also, Teddy has a thing for 30 something military ladies and I love him, so, eek, I'm going to be the hot, hot mic girl at the Congi press release, eek!"

Well, how many times do I need to say it, hmm?

"(Slurp) 30 something military ladies, huh? I'm sure Congi Que can deliver on that, Merri, (slurp), but you owe me a secret now, so?"

"What? A secret like how Mrs. Bentley is actually your Congi Auntie, Congi Auntie Bee Tia Leigh, hmm, like that kind of secret, Congi Len?"

Oh, of course, I passed out over hearing that!

End Congi Len 02