Cuck Therapy Pt. 03

We hurried to the car, parked a few blocks away. Lisa was matching my brisk pace as we silently powerwalked down the sidewalk. I think we were both glad of Brunder's prohibition against talking at that moment. What could either of us say after that?

And it was a constant, silent reminder of what we were ordered to do - to go home and fuck.

As we settled into the car, I glanced at Lisa a moment. She returned my look, and I could tell she was as eager to get to it as I was. I started the engine and I mustered as much attention as I could for the task of driving us home. She got a text, and had a brief exchange, then shut her phone off without sharing it. I could feel her suddenly studying me. When we pulled into the driveway, Lisa reached over and hit the garage door opener and the door started shuddering up. I looked at her. Why did she do that? It was precious seconds wasted - I could have parked in the driveway. She never does that.

I drove into our garage and hit the button to close the door again and it started shuddering noisily down again as I got out of the car. Lisa got out too, but stayed by her door. I already had my hand on the door to the house, and waited for her - what was she doing?Please don't be fucking crying, I thought.You cry after we fuck - you owe me this.

But she looked up at me with her sexy eyes, wordlessly, motionless, maybe a little nervous. She had her hand on the latch of her door. Then I understood.

I hesitated. I didn't know how to feel. I only knew I wanted to do it, but I didn't want to acknowledge it. Not to her, anyway - I didn't want her to misinterpret me, and think she been absolved, forgiven, or, worst of all, given permission.

Of its own accord, my hand dropped from the doorknob and I felt myself walking over to her, the garage door still making its noisy, clumsy progress down. I stood behind her a moment, and she waited with her back to me. I put my hand on hers just as the door slammed shut and went silent. I pressed my body against her, and she held her ass firm against my hard on. She turned her head and looked at me, waiting, expressionless.

I pressed my lips against hers, they were swollen and soft with her arousal. As we kissed, she turned her body to me and put her arms around my neck. I put a hand against her breast and rubbed her hard, swollen nipple through the fabric with my thumb and she sighed hot breath into my mouth, and then her hands slid down to my ass, pulling me against her, grinding crotch slightly against mine. I slid a hand up her skirt and cupped the hot, soaking wet mound of her pussy and then down into the waistband, impatient to feel her. My fingers slid as if pulled by a magnetic force down the slick channel between her labia and into her. She bit my neck as I finger fucked her a moment and then she pushed me off her, grabbing my shirt-front to push me against the car. Now that she had me against the car, she rubbed my cock through my pants as we kissed again. I moaned.

She had told me, and Brunder, exactly what she had done with... with her lover that first time.

This.

She broke off the kiss, still rubbing me, now looking me in the eye, studying me wordlessly. I swallowed hard.

We maintained eye contact as she undid my buckle. She paused a moment, lingering, and then undid the button and fly and let my pants drop. She looked down and saw the wet spot on my underwear where my nob was straining against the fabric, and gave me a little smile. She lowered my underwear a little to free the top half of my cock and rubbed the end of it - I moaned in gratitude and prayed that I wouldn't cum immediately.

She lowered my underwear down below my balls and stroked the length of me, kissing me again, with an eager tongue. She stopped after a couple of strokes and then held my gaze as she slowly lowered herself, pulling my underwear down to my ankles. I looked down at her, squatting before me, her face at a level with my throbbing cock, and taking it in her hand to stroke it some more, still looking me in the eye. Just as she had her lover. And I had the same view of my wife that her lover had, with her hot breath tantalizing against the skin on my cock. She closed her eyes and sucked one of my testicles into her mouth as she stroked me.

"Oh fuck," I moaned.

She had done this to another man. She had made him feel this way, with her mouth, her hand, her sluttiness.

After giving some tender treatment to both my testicles, she slid her tongue up the underside of my cock. I swore again, and she gave me a little laugh. Holding my eyes, stroking me, she licked my nob a little, and then paused, then, still watching me, parted her lips and put my cock into her mouth.

As I watched her, I imaged her lips firmly around not mine but her lover's huge cock as worked her mouth up and down his shaft, slick with her spit, her hand stroking it while she blew him. Of course, she'd have been able to give him longer strokes. Her eyes were still on mine, seeming to say, This is what I did, baby. This is how I sucked his big, sexy cock.

I held on as long as I could, savouring the torturous ecstacy of watching my wife recreate her enthusiastically adulterous blow-job, but I could feel I was about to cum. I grabbed her shoulders, cuing her to stand. She did so, and stroked me as we started kissing again. I put my hand on hers to stop her from stroking me so that I didn't cum right then - we weren't done. She giggled in my mouth, her hand holding my cock but no longer stroking it.

She broke off the kiss, and looked at me, waiting. Remembering the story, I opened the back door of the car.

She waited for me to say something, to recite my line. His line. Get it the back and lie down. I didn't.

Finally, she got in without saying her lines either. I can't fuck you. I'm married.

I followed her in, getting between her legs, sliding her skirt up so that she was naked except for her shoe and panties below the waist. I kissed her inner thigh as we looked at each other. She shot her eyes quickly down at her panties, and I took the cue, grabbing the waist band and slowly pulling them down, as she obligingly lifted her ass of the seat to allow it.

Then she was exposed, her pussy there before me - as it had been for him. Wet and glistening, the labia spread in readiness, exposing her opening and clit. I kissed my down her legs way towards it. As I got close, she ran her fingers through my hair and then used her hand to pull my face towards her. As my tongue landed on her hot, soft, wetness, she moaned.

"Oh fuck," she said breathlessly.

I knew what she liked and it wasn't long before her hips were bucking in orgasm. As it subsided, she pushed my head back, and then put her hand on my cheek. She had her head raised up from the seat to look at me.

"Fuck me. Fuck me now," she commanded.

Was this how it happened?

As if reading my mind, she nodded significantly.

I moved up, and lowered myself onto her. My cock against her belly, my balls hanging down between her legs, pressed against her wetness. She tilted her hips and rubbed her pussy against the underside of my cock, one hand clutching my ass, pulling me against her, the other hand against the back of the front seat.

"Fuck me," she repeated, grinding her pussy lewdly against my cock. She still had her eyes on me. "Please fuck me," she pleaded.

"You want it?" I asked.

She nodded, giving me a more lacivious look than I'd ever seen on her. I hardly recognized her. "Yes," she said. "I..." She stopped herself. "Yes," she repeated.

I remembered her admitting to demanding his "big sexy cock," in her confession, but her nerve failed her here and she left that part unsaid. I heard it anyway.

I couldn't hold out any longer and pushed into her. She moaned and let her head fall back. I gave her about two strokes and stopped myself - I was at the point of cumming already.

She looked at me.

"You gonna cum?"

I nodded.

She sighed, then she nodded and said. "Cum inside me. Fuck me hard...."

I stayed motionless a moment, try to get back from the brink of orgasm.

"Come on, baby. Fuck me hard with that... fucking cock - I want your cum in me."

I slammed hard against her, grunting, and shot load after load in her, watching her face, watching her watch me. Even as I came, I couldn't keep it out of my mind that another man had shot his load in her, my wife, unloading deeper into her than I could, and she had begged him for it.

As I finished, she was still studying me. We lay there panting, looking at each other.

I lay my head on her breast and caressed my hair as we recovered.

"Should we talk?" she asked.

"About what?"

"I don't know. About... today? About... what we just did?"

"We fucked, Lisa. We've fucked before."

"Okay," she said.

___

"So great to see you guys again!" Julienne chirped in her French accent as she led us down the hallway to Dr. Brunder's office. "Did you have a good week?" she asked turning to us, seeming genuinely curious.

Did we have a good week?

We fucked like teenagers all week. No, what was it Dan had said about sex with his wife after their treatment? 'Teenagers don't fuck like that'?

Our sex was intense, laden with the unspoken subtext of Lisa's infidelity looming over all of it. I couldn't stop picturing in my mind's eye that it was not me, but her former lover fucking her, getting sucked by her. I didn't know how to feel about it, or how to stop it. I worried that Lisa knew, and that she would take it as permission, as license to cheat. But I couldn't stop - it was like an addiction.

"Very," Lisa smiled.

Julienne returned her smile and nodded, observing us a little longer than seemed necessary.

"Wonderful," she said happily, knocking on Brunder's door.

----

Once we were greeted and seated, Dr. Brunder went right into it.

"At the end of our last session, I gave you some homework. It was done?"

We nodded, Lisa smiling shyly.

"Tell me about it, please."

A pause.

"It was... very good," Lisa said.

"Good," said Brunder. "But tell me about it. I mean, when you left... it was a very intense session we had, and I think both of you were in a state of acute sexual arousal when you left. Did you go home, or did you go somewhere closer in your impatience for each other?"

"Home," said Lisa. "We don't live far."

"And when you got home, you got right to it?"

"Yes," said Lisa.

"You ran right to bed, or..." Brunder trailed off.

Lisa shook her head.

"We didn't make it out of the garage," Lisa said, smiling.

Brunder leaned back in her chair, nodding, observing us.

"Excellent. Continue."

"I got out and... I waited by the car. By the passenger door. He came over and then we kissed."

Brunder nodded. "Please continue. What happened next?"

"Well, it was.... Actually, it was quite a lot like what happened with Mark. That first time."

Another nod. Brunder didn't seem surprised. "Sort of a re-enactment?"

"Yes."

"Did you tell him about my text to you?"

Lisa shook her head. "I didn't know whether I was supposed to."

"That's fine. John, full disclosure - after you both left, the idea occured to me. I texted Lisa and suggested the approach she took. I hope you understand."

I was a little surprised that I wasn't more annoyed. It seemed a bit of a betrayal of trust. At the same time, however, there was something a little erotic about Brunder subtly directing our sex play through her little deception. It was though Brunder were, if only in a very abstract sense, inserting herself into our sexual encounter. And Brunder was sexy enough that it was hard to mind her playing a psychological sex game with me. Nonetheless, I worried about the footing it put me on.

"It feels a bit like you two are conspiring against me."

Brunder nodded.

"I understand your feelings. Please believe that each decision I make in the course of this therapy is benevolently motivated towards your own interests, every bit as much as it is towards Lisa's."

I nodded.

"Good. Thank you, John. Lisa, were you nervous about how he'd respond?"

"Yes, very much. I hoped he wouldn't get upset about it."

"But he wasn't upset? He was game?"

Lisa nodded.

"He seemed like he kind of... didn't want to acknowledge what we were doing. But... I could tell he... you know, liked it. A lot."

Brunder nodded.

"What was that like for you, Lisa? To have your husband roleplay as your lover?"

"Wait..." I said.

Brunder held up a finger, indicating I should not interrupt.

Lisa swallowed. "Um, it... it was good."

"Did it turn you on?"

Lisa nodded.

"Why?"

"It.... It's really hard to say. It was just... sexy. I don't know how to explain it."

Brunder nodded.

"The psychology will take us a long time to sort out, I expect. But do your best just to articulate what you were feeling."

"Well, I really liked how much it turned him on. I don't think I've ever seem him that... horny. I was just happy to see him... enjoy himself so much."

Brunder nodded.

"Did you think about the sexual encounter that you were roleplaying at all? I mean did you think about your former lover?"

"Well... yes. But, also..."

"Go ahead, Lisa," Brunder encouraged her.

"I don't know, I... I kind of enjoyed it that... um, I thought it was kind of kinky that John was so into thinking about it, you know? I mean, kinky in a good way."

"It turned you on that John seemed aroused by what you had done with your lover?"

Lisa nodded.

Brunder said. "Did you have an orgasm?"

Lisa nodded again. "When he went down on me."

"That was your only orgasm during that encounter?"

"Yes."

We were all conscious of what was left unsaid. I never got Lisa off with intercourse. But he did.

"John lasted throughout without cumming prematurely?"

"He came pretty much as soon as he got in me."

"In the original encounter with your lover, the intercourse lasted a lot longer?"

"Well, yeah.

But, you know, John had been turned on for like an hour before. He was ready to go".

Brunder nodded.

"Did you talk about it afterwards? About having roleplayed your first extramarital encounter?"

Lisa shook her head.

"Did you repeat this role play?"

"No, it was just the once."

"Did you roleplay any of your other encounters?"

Lisa shook her head.

"No, John didn't ask me to describe any other encounters. Sometimes... sometimes in bed, it seemed like maybe he wanted to, but he didn't say anything. A couple of times, I... did things with him that I had never done with John before."

"Never with John, but that you had done with your lover?"

I wished Brunder would stop saying 'lover'. Was she trying to torture me?

Lisa nodded.

"I was worried that he'd... you know, figure out that it was a thing I had done with... someone else, and be upset. But I thought maybe he'd like it. Because of what we did in the car. The roleplay."

"Like what? Can you give me an example?"

"Like... well, Mark sometimes liked for me to lick him below his... his balls. Like between his balls and his... you know... his anus. He liked it when I did that while I... jerked him off. But I'd never done that with John before until this last week."

Lisa blushed a little.

"He liked it? John, I mean?"

"He seemed to. He came like crazy."

Brunder nodded.

"Okay. We may come back to all of this, and how you, John, felt about it all. But first I want to check in how we're doing with not blaming or rebuking or apologizing. Lisa, have you at any time felt prompted to apologize again for your infidelity?"

"Um, maybe just once."

"Tell me about that."

"We were having sex. I thought we were having a really good time. We'd been fooling around a long time - a lot of foreplay and switching back and forth between intercourse and oral, and he was on top of me, and it seemed he was really close to cumming. We were looking in each other's eyes as we fucked, and he said, 'You liked it didn't you? You fucking loved it when he fucked you with his big fucking cock. You little.... " Lisa broke off.

"Slut?"

"Yes. He said, 'You little slut.' And it hurt. I was like, "I'm so fucking sorry, John. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.""

"And did that end the sex?"

"Well, he came first."

"Right after saying that?"

"Yes."

Brunder nodded.

"Okay. I know it is sometimes difficult, Lisa, but you need to stop apologizing for everything you said and did and felt during your affair. You have already apologized - it can become a toxic ritual to keep re-apologizing. In any case, and John, we'll bring you in here, I think it's quite possible that an apology was not even what John was looking for in saying that."

Brunder looked at me.

"What do you think, John? Can you tell us about your motivations for that outburst as you understand them?"

I shrugged.

"Can you blame me for still being angry?"

"I don't blame you for anything. But was it really anger that motivated the outburst?"

"What else?"

Brunder studied me.

"What?" I asked. "I was angry."

"You know, we very often do not really know our motivations for what we say or do or feel. We do it, whatever it is, and then only afterwards do we tell ourselves a story about why we did it."

"You don't think I was angry?"

"You probably were. But that's not necessarily why you said what you said, when you said it."

"Okay," I shrugged, fed up. "Explain it to me."

"Well, we'll have to figure it out together. Let's go back to where we started and get your perpsective. You've just gotten home from here, with the details of your wife's infidelity doubtless having had an enormous effect on you. You are extraordinarily sexually aroused to a degree that is possibly quite confusing to you, given its cause. Your wife..."

"Okay, you can stop there," I interrupted. I had prepared for this. "I've done some research and I want to share a little of it before we go further down this road of feminist psychobabble, okay? Yes, I was a little confused about my... feelings, and I did some research online. It's pretty standard - normal, in fact - for a man who's been cheated on to feel an enormous need to copulate with his partner as a way to ensure that it's his genes and not a competitor's that get to use his partner's womb to produce offspring. That's just how evolution works. Men who feel an intense need to fuck their wives after discovering an infidelity are the result of an evolutionary imperitive. If our anscestors didn't feel this urge, we wouldn't be here."

Brunder studied me impassively.

"Okay," she said. See seemed waiting for me to go on. I felt I'd made my point, so I just stared back at her, determined not to let her win the staring contest.

"Thank you for sharing that, John," she said, recognizing that that was all I had. "I don't dispute that what you say seems logical and plausible. Can you tell me why you wanted to share that here? I mean, all of our impulses are arguably shaped by evolution, just as all of our physical features are. In what way do you think it is helpful in our aims here?"

"I just mean... I'm sure I like what you're hinting at, regarding my 'motivations'. Let's put it on the table and not be coy about it, okay? Just because Lisa's little sex story made me horny doesn't mean I'm glad another man fucked my wife."

Brunder nodded, and continued to study me a moment before looking at Lisa.

"Lisa, did you suggest to John that you thought he was glad that another man fucked you?" she asked evenly.

"What?!" Lisa exclaimed. "No!"

Brunder nodded, and then looked at me again.

"I don't recall making that suggestion either, John. You seem to have anxiety that you are suspected of it, though. Let's put that on the table - possibly it will be useful."