Dave and Alicia Ch. 02

My thanks to Mused, for all his help with this. ~Chargergirl

~~~~~~

He couldn't believe it, but Alicia had really left. Of course, she was only doing what he wanted her to do. Dave had pushed his sister away, perhaps for the final time; he realized too late. Was that what he really wanted? No, deep down where it mattered, it wasn't. His heart screamed at him to chase her, but when his feet finally responded to his brain's command, it was too late. The taillights of her car mocked him as they faded away.

Alicia was crying so hard she had to pull over. She laid her forehead on the steering wheel and sobbed. She cried harder than she had ever cried in her life. Harder even than when she found out her best friend Elizabeth was going to live. But those had been tears of joy.

Dave had told her he loved her; he kissed and touched her. Then he made her leave. Oh, God, why had he made her leave? Alicia felt like her guts were ripped out, thrown down and stomped on. She didn't know what to do or where to go. She couldn't go home, not yet anyway, not in her current state.

A glance at the digital clock on the dash showed 7:27. Elizabeth and Brett would be at home, probably getting Sammi ready for bed. She could go there, at least for a little while. Brett and Elizabeth wouldn't care, especially if she got there before Sammi was asleep. Alicia certainly didn't want to wake the baby.

Much to Alicia's relief, Brett's Charger sat in the drive and the home was ablaze with light. She smiled when she saw the happy-scary pumpkin sitting on the front porch. Year after year, Brett carved the same thing. Alicia found the pumpkin strangely comforting.

The screen door was unlocked, so Alicia entered without knocking. They had long since abandoned the formality of knocking. The TV was on, but the living room was empty. Just then, Brett came around the corner from the kitchen to see who had entered his home.

He smiled when he saw Alicia, but the smile quickly turned into a frown. "Hey, Alli, how--what the hell happened to you?" Her eyes were red and raw looking, and her nose was as bright as Rudolph's was on Christmas Eve. She was a complete mess.

Alicia fought back a fresh round of tears. "I--David and I, we got in a huge...we had a huge fight, Brett." She ground her palms into her eyes in an effort to dam the flood, but it was no use. She burst into gut-wrenching sobs.

Brett went to his little sister's best friend and put his arms around her. "Elizabeth," he called out, hoping to draw his sister out of the bedroom where she was getting Samantha ready for bed. While Brett was happy to offer what comfort he could, he knew that Alicia would much rather talk to Elizabeth than him.

"He's such an asshole!" Alicia cried, her face buried in Brett's shoulder.

Brett made shushing noises; he didn't really know what else to say.

"He's been treating me like crap for weeks and weeks!"

More shushing noises.

"I just can't deal with it anymore!"

Neither could Brett. "How about if I just go kick his ass for you," he suggested, more than half-serious.

That got a little laugh out of Alicia. "You don't need to kick his ass, Brett, but thanks for the offer."

"Well, if anyone deserves it, it's him. He's been a real prick to you lately." Alicia's older brother may have been his friend, but Brett could not condone Dave's behavior towards her.

Alicia snorted. "You noticed, huh?"

"Well, actually Elizabeth has been keeping me up to date. Hope you don't care. Here," he moved away from her and grabbed a cloth diaper off the back of the sofa.

"This better be clean," Alicia muttered as she scrubbed away the tears.

"Probably just some spit-up and drool." Bodily fluids no longer bothered Brett in the least, not with a nearly five-month-old baby in the house. His sodden shoulder, now drenched in snot and tears, didn't even faze him.

The cloth diaper hit him squarely in the chest.

Elizabeth came in then with Samantha in her arms. Alicia's face brightened the moment she saw the baby. Not that she didn't love Brett and Elizabeth, but baby Sammi was in a league of her own. She went and took the freshly diapered infant out of her mothers' arms.

Elizabeth handed over Samantha. "What the hell happened to you?" Elizabeth asked, unknowingly mimicking her brother's exact words.

"Want me to leave?" Brett offered. He didn't really want to, but he would if the girls needed to talk in private. He wanted to stay and hear firsthand what was going on.

Alicia smiled at him, then turned her tired eyes back to Samantha. "Nah, you can stay, you may as well. Hey, little Boo Boo, how are you?" She nuzzled the baby's sweet smelling neck and received a hearty baby laugh for her efforts.

Alicia told Brett and Elizabeth about the fight with her brother. She left nothing out, not the part where he kissed her, not the part when he told her he loved her. She told them everything. She also told them how much she was in love with him. She could hardly believe it, but she confessed it all.

Alicia paced back and forth across the living room as she spoke. She still held Samantha, who was drifting off in her arms. Alicia switched the baby over to the other side and laid her against her shoulder.

"I don't know what to do, you guys," Alicia whispered miserably. "I feel like crap. I can't eat. I can't sleep. My stomach hurts all the time and all I want to do is cry."

Elizabeth smiled sympathetically. She'd felt the same way almost a year ago, when Jim, Samantha's biological father, had dumped her after learning she was pregnant with his child. "I know how you feel, Alli."

"How? Brett didn't do this to you." She turned to Brett with a frown. "Did you?"

"I never treated Elizabeth the way Dave is treating you, no. I think she's talking about Jim." He turned to his sister. "Right?"

Elizabeth nodded. "Yeah. I loved him, and he devastated me." She looked at Brett, smiled gently, and then nudged him with her shoulder. "But you were here."

Alicia watched the tender exchange between her friends. It didn't matter to them that they were brother and sister. It didn't matter to Alicia, either. Dave had been weirded out by it, at first, but eventually he had come to accept it. Alicia realized that he must be having a difficult time accepting his own feelings for her.

Her heart had soared when he'd confessed his love to her and then broke into a thousand pieces with his rejection. The revelation had come as a surprise to Alicia. At least she knew why David had been acting the way he had.

"I just don't know what to do now, you guys." She looked from Elizabeth to Brett.

"Give him some time, Alli. Maybe he'll come around, now that he's told you." Elizabeth said. "Falling in love with your sibling isn't an every day occurrence, you know. I mean, itis Dave we're talking about, here."

That made Alicia laugh. Her older brother was probably the most stubborn, mule-headed man she'd ever known in her nineteen years, and he didn't succumb to change well at all. She almost felt sorry for him. Almost.

Elizabeth stood up from the sofa. "Here, let me take Sam; I think she's asleep." Getting her down would be a snap tonight, thanks to Alicia.

"I should go, anyway," Alicia sighed as she handed over Samantha.

"No, you should stay. I don't think you should drive while you're all upset," Elizabeth insisted.

"I'm OK, really," Alicia protested. "I can drive."

"I think it would be better if you stayed. Your judgment might be off." Elizabeth nodded. "Right, Brett?"

Brett raked a hand through his hair and let out an exasperated sigh. This argument would go on all night if he didn't do something; he'd seen it before. "Alli, you're welcome to stay, of course. If you want to go home, Elizabeth or I will take you, and you can get your car tomorrow. You really shouldn't drive."

Alicia stayed. She didn't want to go home and face her mother's questions, but she did call to let her parents know she wouldn't be home. Thankfully, her father answered and so she was able to put off the inquisition, for the time being, anyway.

************

Dave was as big a mess as his little sister. He didn't know why he'd pushed Alicia away; he loved her so much. He couldn't remember when that particular realization dawned on him. It didn't matter anyway. As close as they'd always been, he'd probably felt this way for a long time.

After Alicia left, he went back inside. His home suddenly felt so empty. He looked around the old foursquare and thought of all the times his sister had stayed over. She had her own room upstairs, which was where he wandered, feeling so lost.

Dave snapped on the lamp beside her bed and gazed about the room. Soft, feminine, and lovely, awash in the soft glow of the lamp, the room fairly screamed Alicia. Pale green and lavender, her room was the epitome of springtime; he'd only recently furnished it. He remembered how, when he'd first bought the place, two years prior, Brett had laughed at him for letting Alicia and Elizabeth repaint the room. Their little sisters had only been seventeen back then; Alicia, so tall and gangly, had seemed like a clumsy, long-legged filly. "Now look at her," he muttered to no one but himself.

Stuck in the corner of the dresser mirror was a set of four pictures of his sister and Elizabeth. It was one of those series taken in a photo booth for a dollar. He pulled it down and, in spite of his misery, laughed at their goofy expressions. They looked to be about fifteen. Alicia was still wearing braces.

Dave kept replaying the scene over and over in his head. The look in Alicia's eyes, the confusion and pain when he had rejected her, still haunted him. It was overwhelming. He felt so stupid. His actions over the past few weeks were inexcusable. He had done nothing but hurt the one person he loved most in his life.

He needed Alicia. He had to have her in his life. There was no way around it. The repercussions were enormous; their parents would kill them if they ever found out, he was sure, or at the very least, disown them. Maybe, maybe not, but Dave couldn't live with maybes, what ifs, or somedays. He had to have her, repercussions be damned.

*****************

Dave spent a sleepless night thinking about his sister, trying to sort through feelings and emotions. Some were old, and some were new. No matter what happened between him and Alicia, he would break up with Stephanie; he knew that for certain.

An early morning phone call to his parents confirmed his suspicions that she had stayed with Brett and Elizabeth the previous night. He headed there immediately. It was just after sunrise.

A soft knock brought Elizabeth to the door. A smile split her face when she saw who it was, and she knew in her heart why Dave was there. She opened the door and took him by the hand. "Come on in."

"Is she here?" A dumb question, considering her car was parked in the drive.

Elizabeth nodded. "Yeah, she finally fell asleep a few hours ago. Want some coffee?"

"God yes, thanks Elizabeth." Dave looked around the living room. There was a blanket and pillow on the sofa but no Alicia. "Where is she?"

"She slept with me in our room. Brett took the sofa last night." Elizabeth led him into the pretty little yellow kitchen and took a mug from the rack. She filled it to the brim with the strong brew and handed it to him without offering cream or sugar. She knew he took it black, like Brett. She topped off her own mug. They were all tired, and it showed. Except Samantha, she always slept like a rock.

Brett wandered in from the bathroom. He'd just rolled off the sofa ten minutes before. "Hey," he muttered and went straight for the coffee as Elizabeth poured him a cup. He took a swallow and groaned in appreciation. "Here to collect your sister?" he asked his friend.

Dave nodded. "Is she okay? We had a fight..." he trailed off, unsure of how much to say.

"We know, Dave. And yeah, she's okay," Elizabeth answered.

"How much did she tell you?" Dave wanted to know, even though he was sure he already knew the answer.

"You know your sister, man. She's pretty much an open book." Brett took another swallow.

Dave smiled at that. "Yeah, she wears her heart on her sleeve; doesn't she?" It was one more thing he loved about her, her openness and her willingness to show her emotions. Unlike him, she wasn't afraid.

A gasp from the hall drew their attention. The trio turned to see Alicia standing there in a pair of Brett's sweatpants and one of his shirts. Elizabeth's clothes were far too small for her; she'd always towered over her best friend.

She was a mess, the loveliest mess Dave had ever seen. Not that he looked great; the bags under his eyes spoke to that. He took a tentative step towards her. "Alligator?" The dark smudges under her eyes tore at his heart.

Alicia's heart began to pound a violent beat in her chest. She wondered how he would torture her now. "What do you want?" she asked flatly.

"I want to--I want...you, Alli. You. I want you." Another tentative step took him closer to his sister. He prayed she wouldn't turn her back on him.

Alicia glared at her brother. "Last night you told me to leave, David. So I left and came here. And now you're telling me you want me?"

"C'mon, Elizabeth," Brett spoke up quietly. He took her hand and led her out of the kitchen.

"Give him a chance, Alli," Elizabeth whispered as she passed by. Elizabeth caught Alicia's almost imperceptible nod.

Alicia entered the kitchen, but kept an arms' length from her brother. She folded her arms across her chest. "You hurt me, David, and not just last night."

"I know, Alli. I'm so sorry. I didn't know what to do. I didn't understand what I was feeling, or why I was feeling that way. It's not right, how I feel about you, but I can't help it."

Alicia nodded. She knew what he meant. It had taken him a while to accept the change in Brett and Elizabeth's relationship. She understood how hard this was for him, how long he must have struggled with his feelings.

"Last night, you pushed me over the edge, Alli. I finally figured it out." He gave a little laugh, one that was almost bittersweet. "Too late, though?"

Alicia swallowed hard. She took a step towards her brother, then another.

Dave grabbed Alicia and swept her up into his arms. She clung to him, her arms and legs wrapped tightly about his neck and waist.

"It's never too late, David," she whispered through her tears.

*************

"Got your stuff?" Brett asked Alicia as she prepared to leave with Dave. She was still wearing Brett's clothes, not that he cared. She clutched the plastic bag holding yesterday's clothes to her. She looked up at him and nodded.

She was scared; Brett could see it in her big brown eyes. He remembered feeling that way six or seven months ago. "It'll be okay." He squeezed her hand. He hoped he was right. Dave and Alicia had so much more to consider than he and Elizabeth had.

"My car..."

"Will still be here when you come back. Don't worry about it, I won't let anyone steal it," Brett grinned at her. Anyway, hypothetical thief would be more inclined to steal the Charger than Alicia's beat up ragtop, but he would never say that to her.

Brett and Elizabeth watched their friends leave. "Jesus Christ," Brett sighed. He shut the door and turned to lean against it. "I feel like we just sent our own kids out into the world for the first time." He held out his arms to Elizabeth.

Elizabeth went to him and wrapped her own arms around his waist. She snuggled into him, reveling in the feel of his body pressed close to hers. "I know. I'm afraid for them, Brett. I don't think they're going to have an easy time of it."

"You mean with their parents?"

Elizabeth nodded.

"I'm pretty sure Mr. and Mrs. Parker know about us," Brett pointed out.

"But we're not their kids, Brett. Do you think we did the right thing? Should we have told them differently?"

"We'd be hypocrites, Elizabeth. It would diminish our relationship, in my eyes, anyway."

"Do you ever think about them?" Elizabeth asked him.

"Think about who? The Parkers?"

"No, Mom and Dad." Elizabeth felt her brother stiffen at her words. His arms tightened around her.

"I try hard not to. Do you?" They rarely spoke of their parents. Brett thought he could count on one hand the number of times the subject had been broached in the last year. He felt her shake her head.

"Nope, not often. Once in a while, though, I guess," Elizabeth admitted with a shrug.

"It's okay, you know." Brett kissed the top of her dark head. "They were our parents, after all."

Elizabeth pressed her face into his chest. She didn't want to think about them, not today, not ever again.

****************

Dave turned left off of Brett and Elizabeth's street. Turning right would have taken them to their parents; left headed towards the highway, and Dave's house.

"Where are we going?" Alicia asked

"Home." He spoke the word with such conviction, Alicia felt hopeful that things might work out for them after all. She tried not to think about what lay ahead. For now, she would take one day at a time.

Ten minutes later, Dave pulled into the long drive, happy to be home, even happier to have Alicia at his side. For the first time in so many months, he felt like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

The hundred-year-old oak trees were like welcome sentinels to Alicia. They surrounded the home on all four sides, their huge branches covered with a season's worth of reddish-brown leaves.

On her way into the house, Alicia reached out and touched the old porch swing, its armrests weathered to a silvery smoothness from years of use. She'd spent many a summer evening swinging there on the rambling front porch, sometimes alone, sometimes with Elizabeth. And sometimes with Dave.

As she stood in the foyer looking around, Alicia felt like she was returning from a long journey. Though she had been there less than twenty-four hours ago, it seemed like years. Dave came up behind her and put his arms around her. She leaned back against him.

"You okay?" he whispered in her ear.

"Yeah." She twisted around in his arms.

"Um...can I kiss you?"

Alicia smiled shyly and turned her face up to his. "I hope so."

Dave kissed her. Their first real kiss. Last night's didn't really count; that kiss had occurred out of anger and frustration, passionate though it had been.

Dave's lips were a warm, gentle pressure on her own; they were tentative, yet full of promise. Alicia had been kissed before but not like that. A couple boyfriends had mashed their lips to hers as they felt her up, but she hadn't loved any of them, and they hadn't loved her. She wanted to know what love was.

He pulled her close and held her, hardly believing she was with him. Dave felt his heart swell in his chest and his penis began to swell in his pants. He wanted her. He looked down and opened his mouth to say something.

Alicia yawned in his face, a yawn so big he thought her jaw would pop.

"Am I keeping you up?" he asked with a wry smile. He knew she was tired, and so was he. His penis began to deflate a little. Going to bed with his sister and making love sounded like a great idea. Going to bed with his sister and sleeping for several hours sounded even better; he was exhausted. "C'mon, let's go upstairs."

As Alicia padded up the stairs behind her brother, the polished wood felt smooth on her bare feet. At the top landing, she turned right and went into her room, while Dave turned left into his.

As Alicia was climbing into her bed, Dave spoke from the doorway, "What are you doing?"

"Going to bed?" Alicia asked, momentarily confused.

"Not in here. You sleep in my room now."

"What? Ohhh..." she smiled, understanding.