Difficult Choices Ch. 02

"Had sex."

"Fucked! And it was magnificent. The best sex I'd ever had with a man. But there was still something nice about sex with Wendy; about sex with a woman. It's . . . it's . . . it's just different."

Looking confused, Tim asked, "Are you saying one is not better than the other?"

Fearful of where this was going, but knowing her failure to disclose had hurt her, Samantha answered, "What we just did was phenomenal. But last night with Wendy was really good, too." Now, he appeared a bit put out, so she added, "Is that a blow to your ego?"

Tim shrugged. "I've never been in competition with a woman. I'm not really sure how I feel about it or how to handle it."

"Well, that's honest." Now, she read disappointment on his face.

"I mean, I can understand how—and even why—you ended up with Wendy, but it would seem to me you'd want one or the other. I was hoping a relationship would develop between us now that we had reconnected, and frankly, that the sex was so good. But I've always been a one woman guy and, well, I would want my girl to be a one—person—girl. Sounds like Wendy wants exclusivity also."

"So, you're basically telling me I've got to choose," Samantha ruefully deduced.

"Put the shoe on the other foot. Would you want me to be also seeing another woman?"

Samantha grinned. "If the woman was Wendy."

Tim gave a forced chuckle, but stood and started dressing.

"So, you're leaving?"

"I need to digest all of this. As I said, I don't really know how I feel about this. It's a lot to swallow all at once.

Samantha just sat on the bed and watched as he left her room and a moment later heard the front door open and close. And there went dinner, and she hadn't made it to the grocery so all she had were the same two choices from last night. That only left one option. She stretched out on the bed on her stomach and wept worse that she had when her marriage ended.

* * *

Not surprisingly, neither Wendy nor Tim answered any of Samantha's many calls the next day. The dilemma became which one to be more active in pursuing. However, she'd offered an explanation to Tim. She owed one to the doctor—if Wendy would let her. Samantha saw her only course of action as going to Wendy's condo and wait. Fortunately, the security guard had come to know her and easily let her in. And so, she stood guard at Wendy's door for over an hour.

When the doctor stepped off of the elevator and saw her, she halted, and then finally approached slowly. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised to see you here," was Wendy's only greeting.

"I'd like to explain."

"What could you possibly say?"

With a shrug, Samantha said, "Give me a chance?"

Sliding her key into the lock, Wendy stopped before opening the door and said, "You know, this is the first time anyone has ever cheated on me?"

"You said you've never been in a relationship so how can anyone have cheated on you?" Samantha tried her best not to be argumentative.

"Okay. You've got me there." She finally opened the door and entered, leaving it open, so Samantha assumed she was allowed to follow. Wendy set her purse down on the counter and turned to the other woman. "I'm listening."

Her tone wasn't cold, but Samantha knew it was an uphill battle. But she decided to simplify it by omitting Saturday night after the wedding. "It just happened. Tim and I caught up at the wedding and he called this morning and asked me to dinner. When he came to pick me up, we talked, he told me he worked on computers and I asked him to look at mine because it's been running slow. He did and one thing led to another and we ended up in bed."

Her expression stoic, Wendy said, "And you really enjoyed it."

"Yes, I did," she answered honestly. "And you were right yesterday. I haven't fully committed to the 'lifestyle,' as you call it, and I never led you to believe that I had. The fact is, today proved that I like it both ways. The question is, will you and Tim let me?"

"My inclination would not be to share," Wendy stated firmly.

"You'd actually like Tim. He might even change your opinion of men. Might even make you want to have sex with him."

"I seriously doubt that."

"Try it. You just might like it."

"I have tried it and I don't like it."

"I did things with Tim and he did things to me that I didn't think I liked. But I really liked it with him. I did things with you that at one time I thought were repulsive. Now I totally enjoy it."

Wendy nodded a couple of times, not in agreement, merely that she understood what Samantha had said. "So, you came here to explain and now you're trying to talk me into being like you."

"Sorry. That wasn't my intention." With a hopeless expression, Samantha added, "I guess I just want the best of both worlds."

Wendy shrugged. "Can't have it."

"Guess not. Guess I'll just have to choose."

"Guess so."

* * *

After Samantha left, Wendy scolded herself for being so harsh with her friend. She should have been attempting to win her back instead of taking a hard line. The problem was, the doctor had never found herself in such a predicament. It was a double-edge sword. Not only had she never gotten so close to one of her lovers that she didn't want to lose her, but she'd never had to compete with a man.

If only Samantha had talked to Wendy first, the doctor might have been willing to give her some space. Samantha had been heterosexual all her life so it was understandable that she wasn't certain what she really wanted for herself. But Wendy had a hard time accepting the deception.

She really didn't want to lose Samantha. Now, what did she do? She pondered that dilemma over and over and found herself in the ground floor lounge next door to her condo building. She was again lost in contemplation until someone stepped up next to her.

* * *

Tim was similarly miffed by the turn of events; so much so, he didn't take any of Samantha's many attempts to call him. He had been honest with her when he told her that he understood how she could have become involved with Wendy, but that was as far as he was willing to go. He just couldn't for the life of him envision a life with her in which she would run off to be with Wendy from time to time—and that was assuming he would even be her primary partner. It could be the other way around—and he certainly would not stand for that.

So, since that night, he threw himself into his work taking jobs that he would have normally assigned to one of his technicians. He hoped it would take his mind off of the situation. But images of Samantha just kept popping up in his head. She was beautiful and he felt certain she would be an ideal partner. He berated himself for not becoming more serious with her back in the day, but he realized how foolish that was.

The question was, how to fight for her? How could he compete with a woman? As he rode the elevator down from a job he just completed, exiting the building, Tim saw a nearby lounge and decided to stop in for a quick beer to settle his mind.

He saw her as he approached the bar and his first inclination was to turn and leave. But he really had nothing against Wendy. She wasn't to blame.

"So, she's driving us to drink."

Wendy turned to see a very handsome man standing beside her. She quickly recognized him as Tim Lawrence. "I'm already pretty good at that."

"Yeah, so am I."

"What are you doing here?" Her tone was less than gracious.

Tim held out his hands in a halting gesture. "Please. You and I have no reason to be antagonists. We're both unwitting players in this."

"You're right." She quickly realized that he really was. "I apologize. She gestured to the seat beside her. "Please sit and let me buy you a drink as a peace offering." Wendy now gave him a second look. He really was very handsome. If she were into men, she could see herself attracted to him. It was obvious why Samantha was attracted to him.

"I was actually going to offer to buy you a drink."

"Why? Is it a threat to your masculinity for a woman to buy you a drink?" Wendy again realized that she was being harsh. "I didn't mean it that way."

He offered her a dazzling smile. "Not at all. I was raised to be a gentleman and to do the gentlemanly things."

"Well, then, how about ladies first and if we're still talking after that you can buy the second round."

"Works for me," Tim said, pulling out the bar stool next to her. "Why wouldn't we still be talking? Are we going to fight each other for Samantha?"

Wendy turned to face him, her skirt rising fairly high on her thighs. Naturally, Tim noticed, but did not ogle nor allow his glance to linger for more than a second. Of course, Wendy had done that on purpose and was impressed that he seemed to give nothing more than a casual glance. "I really don't know what to do," the doctor admitted. "Don't even know what I want to do. I like her very much, but it's apparent she doesn't want to commit to one particular lifestyle and that doesn't sit well with me—and I'm sensing—you.

"I don't think she really knows what she wants. So, do I actively pursue her and hope she turns? Do I give her space until she decides? Or do I let her go to pursue the kind of lifestyle she thinks she wants?"

Tim's eyebrows shot up in amazement. "Wow. I guess I'm facing the same dilemma. We both care for her so much we're willing to forgo our own happiness." Tim's eyes remained on hers, but the image of her legs was etched in his mind. However, that vision slowly faded to the background as the beauty of her facial features replaced it. He could understand that if Samantha was going to be attracted to a woman why she would be attracted to Wendy. She was as beautiful as Samantha.

"Do you mean that or are you just saying that?" Wendy asked wanting to believe Tim was sincere.

Tim returned a twisted expression as though he didn't understand the question. In a tone of disbelief, he said, "Of course, I mean it. However, I would lean toward giving her space to let her decide. In my experience, if you press someone to make a decision, even if they truly want to make the choice you want them to, they go the other way just to spite you."

Wendy raised her eyebrows, impressed with his insight. "True enough, I suppose." She shrugged. "But I don't know if I can be that patient."

"Neither do I. So, where does that leave us?"

Wendy lifted her glass. "Another drink?"

And even after he left, Wendy was concerned that he'd made enough of a positive impression on her that she continued to think about him.

* * *

Dr. Wendy Robinson was surprised the next morning when she saw her first patient—patients? There were three people sitting in her treatment room, two attractive young women, a blonde and a brunette, and a good looking young man. She'd never had three people at once. Looking confused, she asked, "So, who's the patient?"

"Well, we heard you were very open-minded," the brunette said.

"I suppose so," Wendy answered, further confounded. "Why is that important?"

Now, all three seemed embarrassed. "We're a triad," the brunette explained.

"I'm not sure I follow."

"Ever heard of polyamory?"

"Nooo," Wendy responded slowly, curiously, although she thought she might have an inkling of where this was going.

"The three of us—" she gestured to herself and the others "—are in an intimate relationship together. We love each other and we live together in a consensual relationship."

"Like swinging?" Wendy wanted to know as light bulbs went off in her head.

"No," the man responded, finally speaking. "Swinging generally is more about sex. Recreational sex. And swingers may not confine themselves to the same partners, whereas, we are exclusive with each other."

"Instead of loving one other person," the blonde added, "we each love two other persons equally."

"And how is that different from polygamy?" Wendy wanted to know.

"Polygamy is generally one person, usually a man, having multiple spouses," the brunette explained. "Polyamorous is more general. It certainly can include polygamy, but doesn't usually. We know of polyamorous relationships in which two couples—two males, two females—live together. Also, marriage is not a requirement of polyamorous relationships. It's knowledge and consent that define us, an ideology of openness, goodwill, truthful communication and ethical behavior."

Sitting back in her chair, Wendy was suddenly quite interested in this discussion. "What about sex?"

"Sex is not necessarily a primary focus in polyamorous relationships. We're more interested in building long-term relationships with more than one person on mutually agreeable grounds. Sex is only one aspect of our relationship. We don't believe that sexual and relational exclusivity are necessary for deep, committed, long-term loving relationships."

"Interesting," Wendy remarked. "What happens if one of you girls becomes interested in another guy?" She turned to the man. "Or you another woman?"

"The same as in any relationship," the man answered. "We discuss it and work it out. However, we have the added advantage that if the other two really like the new person we might invite him or her to join."

With a nod, Wendy asked, "I'm not big on labels, but for lack of a better one, are you two ladies bisexual?"

Both nodded.

"Is that a problem?" one asked.

"Not at all. What about you, sir?"

"I'm not bisexual, but I wouldn't be bothered by having another man in our bed if I really liked him."

"But you wouldn't have sex with him."

"No."

"So, will you treat us?" the brunette asked.

With a frown, Wendy asked, "Why wouldn't I?"

"We've had doctors turn us down once they learn of our relationship. We've had other doctors who wouldn't talk to the others since we're not married."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Unbelievable," Wendy said with a shake of her head. "Of course, I'll treat you. Which one of you needs treatment?"

The brunette raised her hand. "It's me. But before we get into that, you've shown considerable interest in our relationship. We appreciate that very much. No one—particularly in the medical field—has been so attentive. I have to ask why?"

"Let's just say I have a friend who favors women and the woman she thought she was ready to begin a relationship with reconnected with a man she knew years ago whom she really likes. The woman was heterosexual until she met my friend. Now, the woman considers herself bisexual and wants both my friend and the man. However, neither my friend nor the man seem ready to accommodate her."

"They sound ripe for a polyamorous relationship," the man pointed out. "Is your friend strictly lesbian?"

Wendy grimaced at the label, but let it go for conversational purposes. "She thinks she is, but since she met the man, she's thought about him quite a bit."

"Do you know if the man likes your friend?"

"She didn't think he disliked her and didn't seem jealous of her."

"They should try it," the brunette advised. "It's no different than entering any relationship except that there are multiple people involved. Other than that, we don't consider our relationship any different. We have the same problems any couple has; just sometimes they're multiplied."

"It's an adjustment." This from the blonde. "You have to know what you're getting yourself into, and like any other relationship, you have to work at it, but a little harder because there's two other persons involved."

"We'd be happy to talk to your friend—and the woman and man," the brunette offered.

"Thanks. That's very nice of you. I'll pass that along. Now, what can I do for you?"

The medical issue turned out to be minor, but the discussion had Wendy preoccupied all afternoon. She'd had no idea such relationships existed, and while she could see the benefits of them for some people, she did not think she was one of those people. Still, she could not stop thinking about it.

* * *

The front door bell rang and Samantha was not the least bit surprised. She only hoped her visitor would not be put off by the deception she had used to lure him here. Tim, on the other hand, was not amused.

"I thought I recognized the address," he commented. "Are you really having problems with your computer?"

"You haven't answered any of my calls," she pointed out. Samantha had had to resort to drastic measures to talk to him so she put in a service call with his company and specifically requested him. In anticipation of him coming, she wore only a robe with nothing on underneath. His widened eyes told her he noticed.

"I didn't know what to say."

"Well," Samantha said, dragging it out, "I guess I can't blame you for not answering. After all, I wasn't completely honest with you. And then you hurriedly left the other night."

"Of all the things I might have thought, you with another woman never occurred to me. It was a bit of a shock," Tim admitted. "I mean, I think I could have actually handled it if it was another man."

"I explained to you how it came about."

"Yeah, and I get it. Doesn't mean I can accept it any better."

"So, do we have any chance?" She had her hands in the pockets of the robe and she ever so slightly moved them so the flaps of the garment spread apart a tiny bit revealing a tad more cleavage.

Tim recalled his conversation with Wendy the night before. Aside from deciding not to tell Samantha about it for fear it would have an adverse effect, he said, "We might—once you decide what kind of lifestyle you want."

"So, you're saying I have to choose one or the other." It was a statement, not a question.

"I'm saying you have to decide. I'm not saying what you have to decide. Only you can know that."

"Look, I know this is confusing for you. But it's confusing for me, too. I've been heterosexual all my life, and one night in a week moment, I allowed a woman to seduce me. And though it was nice and I let it continue and even thought I might want that lifestyle, then you came along."

"So, what are you saying?"

"Just that I couldn't want anything more in a man." She spread her hands and her robe a fraction more.

"But you want more. You want a woman, too. Tell you what. You can have a girlfriend if I can also."

"Tim, please understand that I don't know what I want. I need something to help me decide. I've been with a woman for several months now. I'd like to be with a man for a while. I need a friend through all of this." Samantha raised her eyebrows helplessly, inching the robe farther apart. "A friend with benefits?"

"And you will still have a girlfriend on the side?"

"I talked to Wendy yesterday," Samantha said, shaking her head. "She was a bit more cut and dry. Won't have anything to do with me until I choose—and that would likely be only if I choose her. She knows I would ideally like it both ways, but does not seem willing to allow that, nor help me through the decision process."

"So, you basically want me to become your fuck toy? You might not believe this, but I'm not that kind of guy."

"I do believe you, and no, I don't want you to become my fuck toy. I just want us to continue having great sex like we've already had."

"And so later on if you decide you really want to be with Wendy, you'll expect me to just walk away."

"Oh, Tim," Samantha said dramatically, spreading her robe further, revealing much more than cleavage. "I don't expect anything. You do whatever you want to do whenever you feel you need to do it." She stepped closer to him, removing her hands from her pockets and blatantly undoing the robe's belt. "Right now, I'm just so horny I obviously can't think straight." She reached out and rubbed the back of her hand against his crotch, felt his growing erection. "Can you please just fuck me? I really need sex right now, I need it from a man, and you're obviously interested."