Fantasy Celebrity, Big Tit Baseball

It's time. The timing is right. Oh, yeah. Here we go! Look out! Yep, you know what I'm talkin' about. Just as they had the Negro league decades ago, it's time they started a new league, a better league, a sexier league, a league just for us perverts, and a league of their own.

Topless Women's Baseball is what I'm talking about. Am I right? Am I right? Tell me. Am I right? Who's with me on this? Let's see a show of hands, and for you ladies, if you don't mind, with your blouses off, let's see a show of bras held high over your head please. Ah, tits. Thank you very much. Seriously, how many of you would go to a game, no matter how much it cost, to see topless, busty celebrity women? I'd go. I'd be there every game with my camera.

Oh, yeah, forget Billy Ball, titty ball is here to stay! How many of you are in favor of titty ball? Let's see a show of hands. Wow! Look at that. That's weird. Strangely enough there are more women's hand up than there are men's hands. That's odd. Hmm, I wonder why.

"Hey, we love lesbians!"

* * * * *

"Batter up! Let's play some titty ball."

So, let me ask you this, who would be on your fantasy tit ball team? I wouldn't mind watching Katy Perry, Jessica Simpson, Kim Kardashian, Halley Berry, Tyra Banks, Sofia Vergara, Scarlet Johansson, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Selma Hayek, Christina Hendricks, Lindsay Lohan, Heidi Klum, and Meghan Fox running the bases topless. Following the bouncing ball or in their case the bouncing tits, I can just see their tits bouncing and swaying side to side as they ran. Watching them in slow motion would be like watching an Irish Spring soap commercial but with just women.

"Wow!"

Let's see a show of hands, which one of those women do you think has the best tits? I don't know. That's a tough decision. I can't decide. I'd have to see them again and again while comparing them in a tit lineup to make my final decision. Ah, so many tits and so little time. I'd have to feel them, fondle them, and suck them for me to decide which women has the best tits. Oh, yeah, those thirteen women are my fantasy titty ball, dream team.

So, who is on your dream titty ball dream team while keeping in mind, of course, albeit certainly busty enough, that Oprah and her lesbian lover, Gayle King are too old to play titty ball? Now there's a game that I wouldn't mind paying a thousand bucks to see, older busty women running the bases. Definitely, there are enough older busty woman to comprise a fantasy, celebrity tit, baseball team. With Mimi Rogers, Kim Basinger, Rachel Welch, Darrel Hanna, Sharon Stone, Jacqueline Bisset, Penelope Cruz, Angelina Jolie, Bo Derek, Demi Moore, Ann Margret, Pam Grier, Brigitte Bardot, and Angie Dickinson perhaps too old to run the bases, maybe they could just pose topless out in the outfield.

See? If the team owners gave us fans something to watch other than watching paint dry while watching a unendingly long, baseball game, we'd always come back to watch more tit ball. Who's in favor of fantasy, celebrity, big tit baseball? Who'd love to watch busty, topless women running the bases? Who would not only watch but record every game? I may be onto something here.

* * * * *

Instead of going with Playboy Bunnies, Victoria Secrets models, or strippers, adding more class to the game, major league baseball decided to go with headline, famous, female celebrities. Paying them to play three inning games so that at least all nine women would have a chance at bat, all thirty major league teams agreed to showcase the celebrities in charity games. The American League East with the Boston Red Sox, New York Yankees, Tampa Bay Rays, Toronto Blue Jays, and the Baltimore Orioles were first to have the games.

Just as fantasized in my fantasy celebrity big tit baseball game, contracts were signed and thirteen Hollywood celebrities were given one million dollars a game to play 30 games. With more celebrities wanting to play celebrity, big tit baseball, even with some willing to get breast implants to play, next year would be another successful year for MLB. The first female celebrities to play big tit baseball were, in no order, Katy Perry 32-D, Jessica Simpson 34-D, Tyra Banks 34-DD, Jennifer Love Hewitt 36-C, Selma Hayek 36-C, Halley Berry 36-C, Kim Kardashian 32-DD, Scarlett Johansson 34-DD, and with Sofia Vergara 34-C, with Christina Hendricks 38-DD, Lindsay Lohan 36-D, Heidi Klum 34-C, and Megan Fox 34-C on the bench should any one of the stars get hurt.

"Wow!"

Let's be honest. We don't care if they can't catch a popup. We don't care if they drop a fly ball in the outfield. We don't care if they have a hard time hitting the ball and strike out, we just want the catcher to miss that third strike and allow the ball to roll to the backstop for the hitter to run to first base. We just want the pitchers to walk them. We just want the topless women to get on base. We just want to watch topless, busty women run the bases.

"Wow! Double D Wow!"

We just want to watch celebrity, topless women play live titty ball. Now I want you all to get up out of your chair, walk to your windows, open your windows, stick your head outside, and yell.

"We want fantasy, celebrity, big tit baseball. We want to see big, naked tits while watching baseball!"

Now I want you all to sit at your computers and write to your professional baseball teams. Tell them that you want to watch fantasy, celebrity, big tit baseball. There's no need to thank me but if fifty million men and women write to their professional home, baseball teams, we just may get to watch fantasy, celebrity, big tit baseball.

THE END