First Death Pt. 07

I floated in the vast nothingness, the instance between life and complete death reminded me of the eerie time between awake and asleep. I had almost entirely drifted away when, like the piercing shriek of a hawk in the night sky, I heard her voice command me.

Drink. Quickly now.

I pulled together what life was left in me and I obeyed. The thick, iron syrup tasted funny in my mouth before it trickled down my throat. I drank, no energy left in my body to gag. I drank, it took everything I had to inhale her blood, my life depended on it. Her blood...her blood burned like liquid fire down my throat. I tried frantically to pull away but her firm grasp forced her arm harshly to my mouth. The fire pooled in my stomach before jetting out into every vein, muscle and fragment of my being. I could feel the sweat burst through my pores. I thought my eyes would melt out of their sockets. I thought for sure my body would burn the damn world down.

Then, like a light in the depths of hell, I felt Lily's cool skin press up against my back. She put her icy hand on my forehead and I heard her voice, though I wasn't sure if it was in my ears or in my head.

This will hurt like nothing you have ever felt and nothing you will ever feel again. To you it will be an eternity but in actuality it will be somewhere between three and five days. You will want to give up and let the pain consume you, but you have to fight it or you will die. Just when you have reached the point when you think you can take no more, your fever will break, your vision will clear, your heart will stop and you will be reborn. Take solace in knowing that I will be right here next to you until it is over.

It—it was beyond words. Everything hurt. Moving hurt but lying still hurt; noise hurt but so did quiet. Thinking hurt and trying not to think hurt. I fought as best as I could. It felt like what I thought hell would feel like, but ten times worse. I couldn't see, even though somehow I knew my eyes were open. I stared into the vast darkness, looking, searching, hoping for some glimmer of light or color but I got nothing. I heard whispering voices but I couldn't understand them. They nagged at me, never with enough courage to speak loud enough for me to hear. When they stopped, the silence beat down on me like watermelon sized hail. The pressure against my body told me that I was lying down, but I couldn't feel the sheets or the air or even my sweat. I just felt burning. I felt tremendous heat that caused my body to sear with pain, pain like I had never felt before.

Dying wouldn't hurt this much-but I pressed on. Every now and then a flash of cold lit across my body; I knew it was Lily-but it lasted so briefly I mourned its absence. She was right, the only comfort I got was knowing and occasionally feeling that Lily was still there, somewhere on the outside. I felt like I was trapped in an eternal prison, my own personal hell and I would never be set free.

I couldn't do it anymore. I knew my body could probably go on longer but my sprit was broken and I was losing my mind. I was going crazy. The voices murmured louder in the background, the voices of a thousand lost and dead souls that Lily had taken. They whispered of the way things were, the way things should be, the things that they had done and the things that they believed I would do. They told me secrets that I didn't understand. They told me about Lily, though I refused to believe them.

It seemed to last forever, then just like she had said, when I thought I couldn't go on a second longer, my fever broke. I saw flashes of light in the distance, the first thing I had seen in a lifetime of pain and darkness. I could feel the air prickle at the sweat on my body, cooling my skin. The whispers stopped. I felt the heat melt out of me and into the dark abyss, I felt the life drain from my heart, through every artery and vein and molecule of my body and finally out of my finger tips. My heart slowed from beating rapidly, to once every few seconds, until finally it stopped all together. The air escaped from my lungs. I felt myself die before I opened my eyes.

It took me a while to grasp what I saw-it was so complex I thought I was looking at a maze. Tiny white cracks, crevices, valleys and mountains upon millions of miles as far as the eye could see. My focus shifted back like a camera lens and I saw that it was the ceiling. Who knew there was so much detail?

I heard a rumble that grew louder and louder as I focused on it; for sure it had to be a jet plane bearing down on this house hell bent on destroying it. I propped myself up on my elbows. On my chest, curled into a ball was Jinx, purring up a storm.

Pushing him off, I sat up on the bed, discovering no pain or stiffness in my body. I rose slowly, catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror; my skin felt smooth and clean, I was wearing black slacks and loafers, a black button up shirt with a matching tie. Lily must have bathed me and dressed me while I was out—it was a shade unnerving, especially considering I had done it to her many, many times. Trying to imagine her having her way with my naked, unconscious form was erotic and arousing. I pushed that thought aside and walked to the door.

I did not recognize the room I was in, nor the small hallway beyond so I took extra care to be quiet as I approached. Max was sitting on the sofa, arms stretched out over the back, one ankle up over the opposite knee. He seemed relaxed, speaking softly. Lily sat casually with one leg up on the bench in front of a window; the evening view looked out over a city far below, bustling with activity. As if she could sense me, she turned her head and her gaze met mine.

"Welcome to the land of the dead, Matthew."

"Thanks?" Max shifted uneasily when I sat down next to him, "What—what happened?" My mind was a jumbled collection of thoughts and memories that weren't mine and it was hard to distinguish what was real and what wasn't.

Sensing my disorientation, she spoke calmly, "Focus on me, Matthew."

I looked at her and it was as if I was seeing her for the first time. I could see her lips flush red like a bright poppy in a field of snow. Her skin, so perfect, I could see every follicle of hair in her eyebrows. Then, I met her gaze. Her beautiful bright blue eyes swirled a mile a minute into the darkness of her pupils like a deadly mystifying hurricane. My mind grew quiet, the voices gone, locked away.

"It will be difficult, but you must remember to focus on the here and now. When those memories speak to you, you must refuse to listen or they'll suck you in. In time, you'll be able to access them." She swung her leg off of the bench before turning towards me. "Jinx woke me up after they took you. He had already sent word to Max, thankfully and not to Lucas. Max was on his way as soon as the sun started to set and he picked me up. The trail was easy to follow—there are a lot of stray cats in that area."

"Just before a cat caught me," Max continued, "I had finally located Ian. I had a tracker placed on his car but before I could do much more, a stray wandered up to me and started howling. I had no idea what it was saying, but Lucas was never one for cats so I knew it had to be Lily. I rushed over and picked her up; we drove fast to catch up with you. We barely made it." Max dropped his gaze away from me, staring at the floor, "Evan was dead and you were almost too. Lily decided to change you."

The moment he mentioned Evan, it was like a bolt of lightning struck me—Lily's memories immediately flooded my consciousness. I saw through her eyes as wolf after wolf got cut down. Max kicked open the door and shot a guard; Lily came in and shot Alpha John as her eyes fell on Evan. I felt the gut wrenching sorrow that consumed her, pain of having her heart torn from her chest, rage at everyone responsible. I saw her raise the gun in her hand only to be stopped by me; I felt her ache as she crawled to me, her fear knowing that she would lose someone else.

"Matthew," her sharp voice drew me back to the present.

I realized I was breathing deeply, almost hyperventilating. I drew in one last breath and held it, before I remembered that I didn't need it at all.

"Stay focused on the present," she said somewhat angrily.

"You know where Ian is?" I asked, refocusing, "Let's go get him."

Max shifted warily, "It's not quite that simple anymore. He's still at the pack compound."

That caught me off guard, "I don't understand?"

"Well," Lily said, "apparently he had a deal with Alpha Peter. You were to be handed over in exchange for a lot of money. The fact that Max and I burst into there, killed over a dozen wolves before reaching you, took you and left behind the bodies of two dead Alphas kind of gave him the upper hand. There are contracts out on Max and I, over a million pounds for a confirmed death. You are wanted alive and unharmed."

"What?" I was shocked, "John killed all of Evan's men—he kidnapped me. This was all his idea—he plotted with Peter to obtain me in order to draw out you and Ian, with the intention of killing you both! For fuck's sake, he shot me!"

She closed her eyes and sighed; she still wasn't a hundred percent, "Be that as it may, all it appears is that I made an unprovoked attack on a pack and took out two Alphas. Ian was smart enough to not go in guns blazing and instead convinced them that I was a threat that needed to be put down. Believe it or not, that son of a bitch is now working with the wolves."

I couldn't—I didn't want to believe it, "How many?"

"That pack plus two others, about seventy wolves I think? Plus whatever worthless vampire scum he brought with as protection. One pack, a couple dozen vampires maybe—but that many? Our chances aren't good," Max said with a frown.

"Lucas?" I asked.

Lily shook her head, "He refuses to get involved with the packs. Besides, after I took out half his coven he's just as crippled. Not like they'd be much help anyhow."

"Fuck." I groaned, "Tell me you have a plan?"

She looked mildly offended, "We lay low. We need to leave the country tonight—it won't take much longer for those wolves to pick up our scents and track us down. Once we give it some time to cool off, we move in and strike. Ian is the primary focus—I don't want those wolves to be put down." She saw my disapproval at that plan; before I could ask, she answered, "I'm not a fan of vengeful wolves but as it stands right now, the scales are barely balanced; that much death could change things."

I jumped when there was a knock at the door. Lily eyed Max; he just grinned sheepishly. Rising, he offered a greeting before leading in two humans. I felt my eyes go wide when they sat down on the couch; a man a little older than me, purposefully disheveled hair, trimmed beard, scarf over his plaid shirt and faded jeans sat next to an au natural blonde in a thickly knitted black sweater and tight pants. She smiled brightly until her eyes fell on me; immediately they faded and apprehension crossed her face.

"Oh, I'm sorry Max I didn't realize you had company," she said nervously under my gaze.

Lily drifted silently over, crouching down behind the couch so that her head was framed between theirs; I watched her eyes shift to a deep purple, her fangs glistened, her voice thick and smooth, "Nothing to worry about darling, no one is here but Max. Close your eyes and sleep."

The woman's smile returned before her eyes drifted shut and both of their heads fell back against the couch in an instant. I looked at Max, "What the fuck?"

He smirked at me, "My neighbors come over for dinner. I send them home with mind blowing memories of a threesome." Chuckling he sat next to the woman, raising her wrist to his mouth. His fangs sank down, his eyes fluttered closed while he fed off of them.

Lily was watching me carefully; she tilted the man's head to the side, exposing his neck, "You need to feed, Matthew."

I dropped my gaze from hers down to the man; I could see the rising and falling of his chest. The longer I stared at him, the louder his breathing became until I could hear the steady thumping of his heart. Then, I heard the swishing sounds of his blood pumping through his veins with each beat. I felt myself salivate, an aching hunger burning inside of me so deeply, so desperately I felt my hands start to shake.

I was on my feet before I realized it but I stopped myself. This was wrong, I knew it was wrong—the man I killed, those times I drained blood to feed Lily, this urge inside of me. I clenched my hands into fists and I walked out of the living room, past the large granite kitchen island. I opened Max's fridge and I found his bottles of mixed blood; quickly, I downed one without stopping. It helped, a little. I drank two more before my hands stopped shaking.

"Those won't satisfy your hunger, Matthew." Lily's soft voice drifted to my ears; I knew she was right behind me.

I grabbed another bottle, cracking it open when I turned around. Her eyes were a deep red, her teeth fully extended as she ran her tongue over them, cleaning off the last drops of blood from her mouth. Her eyes were appraising my face carefully; while she appeared to stand casually, I could almost feel the tension in her stance and I knew she was ready to fleet away from me at a moment's notice. Looking over her carefully, I found her apprehension odd, "I'm not ready to experience that yet."

"The longer you wait, the harder it will be to stop yourself before you kill someone," her voice was calm, matter-of-fact but she didn't push me; instead she turned and left the kitchen, "We need to leave before dawn."

I slowly sipped my latest bottle; she was right, the mixed blood wasn't enough to fill me completely but it allowed me to regain control of the craving. The alcohol in it, tequila I thought, spread throughout my body. It didn't intoxicate me like it would have before but it left me with that same burning, warming feeling. I finally understood why they were mixed; the warmth was reminiscent of my old body temperature. It was mildly comforting.

I followed her down the hall, Max flanking behind me after eating his fill; we entered a room two doors down from the one I woke up in. When she flicked on the light, I almost dropped the bottle.

"Holy shit," it came out of my mouth before I could stop it.

The walls were all meticulously lined with weapons—guns, knives, swords of every size and shape imaginable, plus more things than I knew names for. I wasn't entirely sure why anyone would need a double headed battle ax or a long spear but I didn't have time to ask before my eyes fell on the large table in the middle of the room. Two massive duffel bags had been dumped out, their contents carefully organized on the glowing white top. I recognized some of the weapons as Lily's, but a lot of the others weren't familiar. There were several containers of hand pressed bullets, several tranquilizer guns and a bunch of antique looking metal syringes.

I picked up what looked like a thick leather belt; two metal D rings broke up the length of leather towards the middle and the end that had a buckle was fitted with a padlock notch. I looked at Max; he shrugged. When I looked at Lily, she glanced up from the vial of a silver liquid in her hands.

"Cobbles," she replied off handedly.

"For...a horse." I stated, confused as to why they'd be mixed in with the weapons.

"For a centaur," she replied.

Even this got Max's attention, "You're shitting me—I knew Evan was odd but centaurs? There's no such thing—what the fuck was he afraid of?"

"Nothing," Lily said placing the vial down, "but he was prepared for everything." She walked to me, taking the hobble out of my hands and setting it back down. Tapping her forehead, she added, "And yes, at least there was such thing. It isn't mine and it is old but I have a memory of half men half horse creatures."

Neither one of us could think of what to say; Lily started methodically packing the bags, putting most of the weapons from the table into them. Shaking his head, Max started pulling some off of the wall; a few Lily vetoed.

"Can you tell me what all of this is for?" I asked finally, relieved but unnerved when Lily left the hobbles on the table.

"We take what we can use, since we aren't sure if we'll be able to make it back here before we confront Ian. My plane is waiting at the airport, it is about an hour's drive. We go to India; I own a few condos there, there are vampires but not many wolves. We hole up for a while, gain our strength and intel, plan then attack."

...

Lily drove, fast. As usual, but now it no longer bothered me. My sharp vision picked out the layout of the road miles ahead, the trees on the side no longer a blur but intricately detailed. We were almost there; in fact, I could just barely make out the lights of the air strip in the distance when Jinx jumped into my lap and started cat chirping. Immediately, she slowed down and came to a stop, looking at him.

"What is it?" Max asked.

"Wolves," she said once Jinx settled down. He hopped onto the dashboard and his wide eyes scanned the darkness, tail flicking. Lily sat still for a moment before she got out and into the back seat, motioning for Max to take the wheel, "Drive the speed limit."

She reached into the back of the SUV and sifted through some bags before pulling out two large, bizarre looking guns. Handing one to me, I popped the magazine and was surprised, "Tranquilizers?"

She slipped one of the small cases with an antique syringe into the top of her boot, "There are a dozen patrolling around this strip and at least five others; Jinx thinks that several allied packs are providing intelligence to Ian. Max, drop us off about a mile out, then continue at normal speed; once you get into the hangar, load the luggage and let the pilot know we are on our way."

I glanced back at her, "And where are we going?"

Smiling wickedly, her fangs glistened in the faint moonlight, "Hunting."

...

I watched Max pull away in the SUV, the red tail lights soon fading in the distance. Calmly, Lily walked off of the road and into the surrounding tree line; I followed her. Our footsteps made no noise while we almost drifted through the darkness, her quiet voice crept to my ears, "Don't kill any of them unless you have to; the tranqs will put them down almost immediately and they'll be out for roughly three hours."

I frowned, "The more we kill now, the less we have to deal with later."

She stopped so suddenly, I crashed into her back but she didn't even flinch, "Don't kill unless you have to." Her voice was harsh, her eyes equally matched it as she held my gaze; eventually she turned and continued on, "There are good and bad wolves, just like there are good and bad vampires and good and bad people, but we don't know where theses ones lie. I've taken too many innocent lives in my time and when given the opportunity, I'd rather risk sparing a bad wolf to kill him later than killing a good one now. Pack structure is militaristic in a sense—the Alpha leads them, the others follow his orders. A direct command affects them differently and it is virtually impossible for them to disobey it."

I understood where she was going with this but I wasn't as optimistic as she was regarding them. While Evan was a good man and a good wolf, he was the only one I ever knew enough to trust, the only one I met who never tried to kill me.

We stopped not far from the strip; crouched low, I followed her lead, keeping my eyes and ears open. I knew that they could smell us if the wind changed or if we got close enough but I wasn't worried—they couldn't out run a gun.

Lily held up three fingers and flicked her hand off towards my right; I nodded, understanding that she wanted me to take those wolves out. Quickly, silently, I drifted through the trunks, keeping my form hidden amongst the thick trees. At first, I wasn't sure how she had discerned that there were three there; I looked, but even my keen eyes couldn't pick out anything in the darkness. I closed them, trying to focus, and that is when I heard it. Heart beats.