Football Widow Ch. 05

"Thank you," Sue whispered as she turned and twisted, admiring herself from all angles.

"I take it you're satisfied with it then?"

"Oh yes, Trina. It's lovely!"

"Very good. Come on back and I'll get you out of it," she said. As the walked back, Sue glanced over at Rita and Wilma. Wilma's body was off the counter now, only her arms were on it, and her head was bumping the glass with each thrust. She was moaning and groaning as Rita really tore her up.

"Break that display case and it's your ass, Rita," Trina said.

"Oh, all right, I'll quit when she cums again, okay?" Rita said with a grunt.

"No, you go 'til she's done. No one leaves my establishment unsatisfied," Trina said with a chuckle. Rita smiled at her boss, winked at Sue, and went back to deep-fucking Wilma.

"Does that happen often?" Sue asked as she followed Trina back to where her clothes were.

"Not all the time, but often enough. Rita has a way with women. I don't run a bordello, by any means, but I do have more customers than you would expect who are gay or bi-curious but living in respectable marriages, or who for some reason can't or haven't experimented. I try to do what it takes to make loyal customers and, to a lot of my customers, a trip here includes getting some of Rita's personal attention," Trina replied nonchalantly. When they reached the open area, she stepped behind Sue and began to unlace her.

"Rita works on commission and she is indefatigable. She also has absolutely no discernable taste. Pussy is pussy to that girl, and she doesn't care if the woman is fat, thin, old, young, beautiful, ugly, black, brown or white. I think her only criteria for a sex partner is breathing, and I wouldn't even bet on that," Trina said and then chuckled.

"I guess that's a plus," Sue grunted as Trina pulled the laces hard to get enough slack to begin work on the knot.

"Oh, yes. She does quite well for herself. She can tell a woman she's beautiful and mean it, simply because her definition of beautiful is only dependent on the person she's viewing having a puss. You would be amazed at how much women will spend on lingerie and toys just to get a few sincere compliments," Trina said.

The older woman helped Sue out of the corset and boxed it up for her as she dressed. When they returned to the front, Wilma was leaning over the counter from the shop side again, kissing Rita. The both made their way back out to the car and Sue noticed her companion had a small bag with her. It was just about the right size to be holding a big blue dildo, Sue thought with a smile.

"Damn, I am so glad you invited me to come with you. That was just what I needed to make it through the day," Wilma said as soon as they were back on the road.

"I'm glad you enjoyed it," Sue replied as she lit another cigarette and closed her eyes.

***

Days blended into weeks and weeks into months. Sue's relationship with her husband continued to deteriorate as he began spending more and more time out with his friends. There was always an excuse: the NBA Finals, The Stanley Cup, March Madness, and eventually the beginning of the preseason. Sue lavished more and more attention on her children and spent more and more of her evenings alone with her vibe and her imagination.

She had quietly accumulated a small collection of lesbian erotica, which she kept carefully hidden. Not that she needed to worry. Bernie was rarely home and when he was, he was generally asleep or watching television. She resisted the urge to call Christa and even threw the small scrap of paper with her number on it away several times, but she always retrieved it before the garbage went out.

Her birthday slipped by unnoticed, and she went to bed without even seeing Bernie. He came in late and passed out within moments of hitting the bed. The next morning he took the kids down to the city as part of the school's annual parents' day at the MET. Sue saw them off, then went back to bed. She awoke crying two hours later. She hadn't gone with the kids because Bernie had wanted them to himself for a day. His constantly not coming home until well past their bed times was causing them some problems and Sue relented, but now she just felt lonely.

Christa had awakened her sex drive and she was constantly horny now, but it was more than that. She needed to be held and told she was important. She needed to be loved. Her children gave her so much unconditional love, but she needed it from a partner too. She was still sniffling when the doorbell rang. Sue padded downstairs, wrapping her robe around her, and answered the door.

"Hello, baby," her mother said.

"Mom!" The tall blonde exclaimed and hugged her mother tightly, "What are you doing here? I wasn't expecting you."

"No, and I didn't call because I knew you would have put me off," he mother said. "Now go get dressed. We're going out."

Sue was so glad to see her that she didn't get offended at the preemptory orders and rushed upstairs. She dressed quickly in casual clothes and hurried back down. Her mother said nothing, but led her out to the car, after Sue phoned in sick to work. Her mother was driving, and soon they were on the Palisades, headed upstate.

"Where are we heading, Mom?" Sue asked.

"It's a surprise," the older woman said and would say no more about it.

The ride was pleasant and they reminisced. Her mother got off the parkway and the surroundings were vaguely familiar to Sue, but it wasn't until they pulled into the parking lot of the small building with the giant ice-cream cone on top that she realized where they were.

"Babington's!" she squealed in delight. She ordered a banana split, her favorite, and her mom got a malt. They sat at one of the dilapidated picnic tables in the warm sun as a spring breeze carried through the trees.

Sue felt like a little girl again. Babington's had been the most magical place in the world when she was growing up. This had always been the place they went to on her birthday. In those days, it had been ice-cream like none other in the world. Today it was memories that were so happy they brought tears to the tall woman's eyes.

"Thank you. I needed this," she said as she looked up at her mother and smiled.

"You need a lot more than this," the older woman said. "And now that I have fed you ice-cream, I am going to feed you vinegar."

Sue looked confused, but her mother smiled softly.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean you're depressed, and your father and I are extremely worried."

"I'll be fine, Mom," Sue said with a smile.

"No you won't. You're marriage is a failure, and the only one who can't see that is you. You're so lonely and depressed it carries over the phone lines when you call. What happened to this wonderful girl that you were telling me about the last time I was here?"

"I broke it off," Sue replied.

"I thought so. Call her, Suzanne."

"Mom, I can't. I have children and they need a father," she said without conviction.

"Cow puckies," the old woman snorted. "You're just afraid to leave Bernie. Now don't get me wrong. I love him, always have, but you're my flesh and blood, and for your own sake, you have to leave. And there is no reason in the world this woman cannot help you raise a family, unless she doesn't like children."

"No, she even wants to have one," Sue said thoughtfully.

"Adoption?" her mother asked.

"No, in vitro. Her brother died young, but left some sperm at the sperm bank."

"Oh, so she would want you to carry the child?" her mother said smiling. Sue smiled back.

"Yes, mom, since you're fishing. She's very masculine," Sue said.

"I wasn't fishing. Not really, I just want to know more about her. I have never heard you as happy as when you were with her," the older woman said.

"Mom, she's black," Sue said and waited for the fireworks.

"I swear, child. The life insurance policy is only worth a few thousand dollars. I'll gladly give you that much, if that's the plan. Are there any more bombshells you'd like to drop on your poor old mother?"

"You aren't upset at all are you?" Sue marveled.

"I don't care if she's green, with three heads and bug eyes. If she makes you happy, then I am going to love her. And if it means another grandchild, then doubly so," the older woman said with her eyes twinkling.

"I'm getting to the point where a pregnancy would be a dangerous thing."

"Your grandmother had me when she was forty five, and I was thirty nine when you were born," he mother observed.

"Oh, I don't know why we're even talking about this," Sue said, suddenly feeling her depression crash back in upon her.

"Because you need to leave," her mother responded simply.

"And do what, mother? Move in with Christa? And what about the children, should I bring them along?" Sue shouted.

"Christa. Well, at least now I know her name," the older woman said smiling craftily.

"Mother..."

"No, you just shut up and listen. Your mother is about to give you a lecture, and it's high time someone did. You only get so many years on this earth, and spending even one of them miserable is an affront to God. The All Mighty didn't put us here to suffer and I don't give a hoot what the parson says. I've read the bible myself, don't need an interpreter. You were happy with that girl and don't bother denying it. I could hear it in your voice and it's why I knew you were having an affair. And it wasn't just an affair either. There was a lot more to it than licking each other's twats, wasn't there?"

"Mother!" Sue exclaimed.

"Don't you 'Mother!' me. I know what lesbians do in bed and I know what a twat is. I can also say pussy, cunt, snatch, box and muff. Stop acting like I am some kinda old granny," she said.

"You are a granny," Sue pointed out with a bemused smile.

"And you're acting like one," the old lady declared.

Sue had to smile. Her mother's bluntness had always been a bone of contention between them, but today she found it endearing.

"You're thirty-seven, not ninety-seven," she said as her voice softened. "I already contacted Malcom Jessop for you. He will represent you in the divorce proceedings. Your father and I had your room redone and Ole Jax Wilkens turned the attic into a couple of bedrooms and a playroom for the kids. Not that I want you coming home, mind you. I want you to move in with that girl, but in case it isn't an option, you can always come home."

"Seems like you've already made up my mind."

"No. Only you can make up your mind. What I have done is removed your crutches. The only excuse you have now is fear of being alone. But if you think about it, how much more lonely could you be?"

The tall blonde had no answer for that question.

***Trina sat, once again, in the PI's office. She leafed through the black & white photos and then looked up.

"Is that the best you can do?" she asked sourly.

"Sorry, miss. He ain't fucking her. Only went home with her once and didn't stay long enough to do anything. I can follow anyone, but I can't make the guy dip his wick, even though she is a hot little piece of ass. I made sure I got plenty of them hugging and playing sucky-face. That was hard enough," the black man said.

"They did go to her place once, though. Correct?" the old woman said.

"Yeah, for a night cap, I would guess, but he wasn't there more than five minutes."

"Mr. Jones. How much would it cost for him to have been there an hour?" Trina asked.

"Hey, lady, you're talking about filing a false affidavit. I could lose my license," he said, glancing about warily.

"No, I'm talking about five hundred dollars in cash," Trina said evenly. The man wiped the sweat from his head and licked his fat lips.

"All right. For that I can change my log book," he said.

"I want a sworn affidavit," Trina responded.

"Well hell, alright."

Trina and the PI went down to the nearest notary and, within forty-five minutes, she was on her way back to the shop with incriminating photos and a sworn affidavit. It would have been easier if the man were like normal men and was fucking his little bitch, but no. Nothing was ever easy, she thought. From the evidence, it was pretty obvious he would be, but Trina was running out of time. Christa was sliding back into her self-destructive depression, and that was something the old woman was not going to allow.

***

Sue rose late and among the things she did that morning, she brought in the mail. A particularly heavy manila envelope caught her attention, especially when she noticed it was addressed to her and with no return address. She sat at the coffee table and opened the envelope, expecting it to be from work. Three hours later, she still hadn't moved from the spot, but when she did finally stand, it was with a purpose.

***

When Bernie came in, the house was dark and empty. The only light on was the one in the kitchen, which was strange, as the whole house was usually dark. He came in to find Sue sitting at the table with a cup of coffee before her. She was dressed warmly and alarm bells started going off in his head. He also noticed her old carry all on the floor next to her.

"Hey, honey, what ya doing up so late?" he asked tentatively.

Sue said nothing, but simply pointed to the chair across from her. Bernie sat down and started to say something, but the look in her eyes froze him. She pushed a manila envelope across the table.

"What's this?" he asked.

"Open it," she said quietly.

He opened the flap and pulled out a stack of photos. The first one showed him and Shelly kissing deeply at a table down at First and Ten sports bar. He looked through the rest, almost mechanically. The pleasant buzz he had brought home evaporated like mist.

Bernie stared at the pictures for a long while, then looked up suddenly, "It's not what you think honey, I swear it."

"Do you love her?" Sue asked, ignoring the declaration. She had expected a quick denial, but Bernie looked at her a long time before replying.

"I don't know."

"I want a divorce," Sue declared.

"Honey, I swear I haven't cheated on you, she's just a friend!"

"No, she's more than a friend. You have cheated on me, if in no other respect than you have given her the affection and attention that you once gave me. You may not have actually fucked her, but in your mind you've done it with her a hundred times," Sue said flatly.

"You can't hold what I've thought against me!" Bernie almost shouted while throwing his hands into the air.

"I can. Don't get me wrong, Bernie. It isn't all your fault. I've fallen for someone else too. I'm in love more deeply than I've ever been before, with someone who loves me back and cares about me."

"Who?" Bernie demanded. His face suddenly contorted with rage and Sue felt some fear. He had never hurt her before, but he was a big man and he was clearly angry.

"It doesn't matter who," she said calmly.

"Who, damnit!" He shouted and rose, leaning across the table, and for a brief instant Sue felt like she might have made a terrible mistake. She could smell the whiskey on his breath, and his eyes were wild.

"It's none of your business who. The fact is I have, and you've obviously found someone new too. We have children, a mortgage, and a lot of other things that we need to talk about. I'm not staying here with you another night, and I've sent the children to my parent's place," she said.

"You can't do this to me," he whined.

"This is the hardest decision I've ever made, and I'm not going to let you change my mind by making me feel guilty about it. I'm tired of living my life for others and I'm tired of being your mommy. I've found someone who makes me feel sexy and alive. Someone who loves me as a soul mate and doesn't see me as a housecleaner and accountant and nanny, but as a woman." She said in a steady voice. He appeared to be about to speak, but his mouth snapped shut and anger clouded his face.

"I can see that you're angry," she said. "Maybe you have a right to be, but you're scaring me and if you don't calm down I'm leaving right now. We can let the lawyers work out the details." Her voice was still firm, but she was getting nervous.

Bernie clenched his fists, but then relaxed. He sat back down and poured himself a cup of coffee. He looked at her and, for just a moment, the child-like anguish she saw in his eyes made her want to change her mind. For an incredibly drawn-out moment, she wrestled with it, but in the end, she knew she was doing them both a favor, and she knew she was doing the right thing for herself.

"I want the house and the kids," Bernie said. Sue didn't let herself react. She knew perfectly well that he was trying to cow her into backing down by demanding the children. The house didn't mean a damned thing to her, but it was important to him, and he must have assumed it was important to her too, if he was going to make it a demand.

"I'm going to have custody, Bernie. You can give up any idea that I won't right now," she said sternly. "If you want to be a continuing part of their lives you had better understand that. Those pictures of you with that woman will go hard on you if I have to take it to court. And there's a sworn affidavit in there from a private eye. Please don't make this nasty. I would rather part as friends. It's all we've really been for quite some time now, if you think about it."

"Why?" Bernie asked with tears forming in his eyes. Sue sighed heavily before she replied.

"It's just the way things worked out. Some things aren't meant to be, that's all. It isn't anyone's fault; it's just the way life is. You want someone else, someone young and who shares your interest in sports. I want someone else, someone who can do things to me that you can't comprehend, much less emulate."

"Can't we try again? I swear I won't see Shelly again. I swear it on my mother's grave, Sue," he pleaded.

"It's too late to try again, Bernie. I don't want you to not see this woman. I hope you find happiness with her. I still love you, but I am not in love with you. I hope you find the happiness with her that I've found. You can't make me feel like this and I can't make you feel like this. I know you're scared. I know you haven't been out on your own in a long time, but you are going to have to pull yourself together and get through this. I can't be there to do it all for you anymore."

"So what is this guy like who can make you feel like this? Whatever the hell this is," he snapped, his anger boiling to the surface again.

Sue shook her head sadly and stood up. She picked up her bag and headed towards the front door. She looked back only once, to see Bernie still sitting at the table like a lost child and for the second time she had misgivings. She started back, but his head came up suddenly and he stared at her with hatred in his eyes.

"Get out!" he spat.

Sue turned on her heel and left. The tears were burning her eyes as she drove away. Sue stopped at a service area on the Palisades and cried until no more tears would come. Finally, she rolled down the window and took a deep breath of fresh air. She picked up her cell and fumbled through her purse for the scrap of paper that Christa had written her number on many months before. She found it and, with a trembling hand, dialed. One ring, two, three... At five she began to panic, and by the tenth ring she was beginning to think she was a complete fool. Risking everything on a phone call at four-thirty in the morning, to someone she hadn't even spoken to in four months.

"Yeah?" a sleepy voice came over the line.

"Christa?"

"Sue?"

"Yes."

"What's going on, girlfriend? Is Bern out of town or something?"

"Christa, can I come over? I... I need a place to stay," Sue blurted out. There was a long silence on the line before the small woman responded.