Home for Horny Monsters Ch. 089

Not that it mattered. The administrative building was deserted. Half eaten snacks and unfinished mugs of cocoa had been left at desks and on tables. It was as if the elves here had walked off the job, no questions asked.

There must have been an open window somewhere in the building, because it created an eerie howl that made her think of a lone wolf in the forest. Maybe the sound was a manifestation of the soul of the North Pole, calling out for the lost sounds of the workshop. Maybe it was the spirits of the Northern Lights, singing a funeral dirge for the elves of the workshop.

Or maybe it was just the fact that she was wandering through abandoned buildings that were spooky as hell, knowing the Krampus could be around any corner. Her anxiety built as she wondered if she could hide from such a being. During the fight with the Horsemen, they had lost track of her more than once. Was the Krampus more powerful than the physical manifestation of War? Or was he just a scary ass fucker giving her walking nightmares?

"Focus, dammit." She patted her cheeks, and pulled a cookie out of her pocket. It was delicious and filled her belly, but she was already missing the taste and ambiance of one of Sofia's home cooked meals.

It took her an hour to clear the building, and she saw no sign of the elves or anything else of interest. She found the tunnel system under the building and used it to go next door. This massive building was a warehouse with giant rolls of wrapping paper and several push carts for carrying them. It was much faster to check this one as it only had a few offices.

After checking the map again, Kisa skipped the tunnel and went outside to cross the street. The snow was up to her waist in places, and she frowned when she heard the crunching of ice behind her. Looking up, she saw that a snow griffon had landed on the roof of the warehouse, surveying the city with a steely gaze.

Unsure how her abilities would work on a creature that wasn't alive, she knelt down behind a drift and waited. The griffon paced the roof, then let out a shrill cry before taking flight again, leaving Kisa by herself.

The next few buildings yielded nothing of interest, though Kisa found a pair of pouches similar to Holly's. One was empty, but the other had been stocked up with cookies and candy canes, so she took it. She didn't recognize the type of cookies inside, but her danger senses triggered when she went to take a bite, so she left it alone.

After a check-in with Mike, Kisa decided it was a good time to take a break. She found a building with a big door, twenty foot high rafters, and replacement parts for Santa's sleigh. Satisfied that it was a safe place to hide, she used a ladder to climb a nearby wall, then sunk her claws into the wood and scaled the remaining distance until she was up above the work zone.

Closing her eyes, she pictured the map in her mind. Not only had she found no trace of the missing elves, but she hadn't found any sort of records room. It was an idea that she had come up with after the encounter with Christmas Past and asked Holly about in a roundabout way. Somewhere in the North Pole, there was a room where Santa kept track of all the gifts he had ever given out and who he had given them to.

Holly had explained that Santa gave gifts in a way that allowed for adults to take credit for them later. Kisa had this potentially insane idea that the old man who took her in would have addressed any gifts for her with her nickname, meaning that Santa would have done the same thing. A records room would potentially have such information, so why not her true identity, or the identity of the old man?

Even if she found out who she was, it technically wouldn't change things for her. To anybody who knew her in her old life, it had been several years since she just disappeared one day, never to be seen again. And it wasn't like she had family that was looking for her.

If nothing else, she wanted to remember the man who took her in and cared for her when nobody else did. It seemed only right that someone mourn his death, even if it was so long after the fact.

She had told Mike some of this months ago, and he had done what he could to help. Private investigators had been of little use, and even Eulalie had been unable to narrow down a location or date based on Kisa's descriptions of her home. After enough dead ends, she had given up.

But now she knew she had a grandmother, too, one that loved her. That knowledge alone had reopened her desire to learn about her past.

When she fell asleep, she was in Mike's Dreamscape again, which meant he was asleep. It was such a strange sensation, knowing that she was walking around inside his mind, a feat made possible by being his familiar. Her winter coat was gone, replaced by a midriff and dance shorts. Far happier in these clothes, she wandered the grounds of his soul for a bit, headed in his general direction. He was waiting for her on the roof of the house, one of her favorite places in the real world.

"There you are." He patted the shingles next to him, and she climbed the trellis to join him. "How is the Christmas village?"

"Spooky as fuck." She laid back and let out a frustrated sigh. "I haven't found out anything, I feel like I'm letting everybody down."

"Hardly." He rubbed her exposed belly, scratching the fur near her waistband. This was something she enjoyed in the real world, too, but didn't indulge in unless it was just the two of them. She embraced quite a few things about being more cat than woman, but this one was more embarrassing than others.

"I also have something to confess," she told him. "My intentions weren't exactly pure. I had this stupid idea in my head that I might figure out who I was by digging through old records or something."

Mike looked at her with curiosity. "That's a bit of a leap. Do they even keep records up here?"

It took her a few minutes to explain it to him. By the time she was done, she had moved her head onto his lap where he now ran his fingers through her hair.

Mike was quiet, and Kisa worried that she had disappointed him. She didn't used to care, but their bond had gotten much stronger in the last few months, making her put him on a pedestal in a manner he wouldn't agree to. It had bothered her at first, idolizing a man she barely knew only because of their magical connection, but he had never taken advantage of it.

"Can you make her? Your grandmother." Mike lifted an arm and an image of a generic old woman appeared. "Just change the things you remember and we can get her as close as possible."

"How will that help?" she asked.

"Because I'll have Lily copy it and then show Eulalie in real life." Mike examined the floating picture while chewing at his lip. "We could even do that for the old man, you remember him better. I wish I had thought of it sooner. Or maybe it would be better for her to dive into your dreams? Whatever you're most comfortable with."

Stunned, Kisa did as he asked, spending several minutes sculpting an image of her grandmother with Mike. Once finished, it wasn't quite right, but it was passable.

"Oh, and if you find the records, don't get caught up digging through files. I don't want you losing track of time or your surroundings." He sat back and admired their handiwork. "The blank face must have been unsettling to see in person."

"Very." She leaned her head on his shoulder. "So what are you up to tonight? Banging your way through your dream harem."

He laughed, wrapping an arm around her waist. "You sound a little jealous."

"Yeah, well, I always get this background buzz whenever you're getting busy with someone, doesn't matter whether you're awake or asleep. It's not as bad as that full moon incident in the centaur village, but still, it drives me nuts! End up horny all the damn time while you're busy laying more pipe than a plumber."

"Yeah, sorry about that. I'll admit it, I spend time trying things out with everyone in here. It's also a lot safer, because nobody can get hurt."

Kisa lifted an eyebrow. "What the fuck are you all doing in here that would hurt you?"

"There was that one time we had a game of naked Twister and Abella fell on Tink." The stupid grin on Mike's face meant he was telling the truth. "Oh, and the fairies can be life size, if they want. That's always interesting."

She snorted. "Then why bother with fucking anybody while you're awake? Sounds like it's way more fun in here."

"Because I prefer the people these souls belong to. After all, I'm just borrowing them until, well..." His face clouded over, and he sighed. "But you'll be happy to know that the extreme beach sex tournament was cancelled. Ratu, Naia and I are going to talk about how to fix Jack."

He had alluded to this in their updates over the last day. Jack Frost was apparently a fragment of the goddess Freya, who had manifested inside her body, or their body, Kisa was a bit fuzzy on the details. Mike had gotten the idea into his head that he could keep her from falling apart completely, maybe even fix her, but Kisa had doubts.

"But we've got to work on repairing those broken threads," Mike said. Kisa realized she hadn't been paying attention. "If we can get her functional, she might be able to help with the ice monsters roaming all over."

"That would be a big help," Kisa admitted.

They chatted on the roof for a while longer, then Mike left to meet with the others. Kisa stayed behind, enjoying the feeling of the faux sun on her shoulders. She didn't mind the mini vacation from the North Pole, and hoped that she could curl up with an actual sunbeam sometime soon.

A harsh, guttural voice severed her connection to the Dreamscape, and Kisa opened her eyes. Below her hiding spot, she heard a loud rattle followed by a crumpling sound.

"Clear it all out," the Krampus demanded, and Kisa moved to the edge of the beam to take a look. The Krampus stood on a rickety sleigh hooked up to seven demonic reindeer. Around him, a mountain of presents had appeared. Dozens of elves surrounded the sleigh, and they dutifully picked up the gifts and rushed them away in carts. "I expect you to have this place ready for my return."

Oh, shit, she thought to herself, her tail flicking back and forth. The elves obeyed without hesitation, pushing the carts toward a doorway she hadn't noticed before.

"Krampus." The grating voice sounded like gravel in a rock crusher, and an immense figure appeared in the opening to the barn. It was Grýla, her face concealed by long, greasy locks of hair. "I have news."

The Krampus ignored her at first, dumping an impossible amount of presents out of his sack. It wasn't much bigger than a backpack, but he swung it by the bottom, casting out hundreds of gifts in a wide arc. Once empty, he gave the sack an exploratory squeeze and turned toward the giant.

"What happened to you?" he asked.

"That mortal." Grýla limped forward, then bowed. "Jack had been gravely wounded, and his people captured her. When I went to retrieve her, he did this to me."

She pulled her hair away from her face in a dramatic reveal. The mottled skin underneath had been blasted apart, making it look like she had taken a hot iron to the face. Deep gashes had been instantly cauterized, her eyes stuck looking wider than normal. In some places, the skin was missing, revealing the fat and muscle beneath behind.

The Krampus laughed. It was a horrible sound that made Kisa sick to her stomach.

"It's an improvement," he said, then tossed his bag back in the cart. "What would you have me do, hmm? Try to break into my own home? Not with that old crone in there, oh no!" The Krampus smoothed down the fabric of his coat in contemplation then leaned on the sleigh. "But we won't have to worry about her much longer. This sack doesn't hold as much as the big one. If your idiot children hadn't failed at the one job I gave them, I would have retrieved all of Santa's gifts already and your face would be, well, as it was. Your revenge will come in time."

"I don't want time, I demand compensation!" Grýla slammed her fist into the ground, causing the whole building to shudder. Kisa had a horrifying mental image of falling from her hiding spot and landing right between the giant and the Krampus.

"Interesting." The Krampus studied the giant anew, stroking his scraggly beard. "It would seem there have been more changes here than I realized."

"I am stronger now." Grýla held her head up high, which was still somehow lower than her stooped shoulders. "I have more power."

"Without Jack, I do need someone I trust to monitor things up here. But perhaps on my next trip out, I could bring you a special present?" The Krampus laughed. "Though you would have to wait for Christmas day to eat it."

"Eat?" Grýla's eyes lit up. "You would bring me something...to eat?"

"The one thing Santa wouldn't let you have, that's right!" The Krampus smiled and hopped onto his sleigh. "Things are going to change, Grýla. The world is about to change, and you're going to be right there by my side when it does. No more bowing down to the humans, nor obeying their whimsy. I will not be beholden to the same rules as Santa, I'm going to do things my way. The children of the world will quake in their boots, knowing that I watch their every move, ready to dish out punishment on Christmas Day!"

Grýla was ignoring the Krampus, long beads of drool now hanging from her mouth. "After so many years," she muttered to herself. "I had almost forgotten how they taste."

"All in good time." The Krampus hopped into the driver's seat, his reindeer stamping the ground in excitement. "I shall return soon enough. If you get the chance, kill the Caretaker."

"Caretaker?" Grýla asked.

"The mortal, or Mike, as he likes to be called." The Krampus scowled at her. "Now get out of my way."

Grýla dutifully moved aside, and the Krampus snapped the reins. There was a loud crack, and he was gone, leaving behind only a set of tracks in the snow.

"Food," muttered Grýla, staring in the direction the Krampus had departed. She patted her belly a few times, then looked over at a nearby elf.

"Appetizer," she declared, picking the poor thing up in both hands. The elf didn't even struggle as she carried it outside into the snow. Kisa covered her mouth in horror, the elves below continuing their task without fail, seemingly oblivious to the loud crunching that came from outside.

❄️❄️❄️

Mike stood on the edge of the fountain, a swirling mass of energy overhead. Lily sat cross-legged in front of him, one hand gripping his wrist as she helped him manage the Dreamscape and maintain the virtual soul they had constructed. Though she typically saw souls as tiny lights or humanoid forms, the shifting lights were common between all three, and she was responsible for making it shine.

Naia lay beneath the pseudo soul, contributing her own knowledge of how a soul functioned, the miraculous threads folding through each other like a kinetic optical illusion. Between the three of them, the result was still a very basic knock-off of what Mike saw compared to the real thing, but simulating a true soul was essentially impossible.

"Fascinating." Ratu had been walking around the fountain for several minutes now, deep in contemplation. "It's unlike anything I've ever seen. I have studied sentient magical objects before, but even then, I only see the magic itself. The threads aren't as plentiful, nor are they as interwoven."

Mike said nothing, his concentration centered on the projection. "So with Mrs. Claus, I did something like this." He severed a couple of the threads, causing them to unravel and turn into mist. After several seconds of letting them unravel, he started weaving the loose ends together and tucking them back in.

"Okay, that makes sense to me. To you, it's like making sure a string doesn't slip loose, but these are non-Euclidean. Look." Ratu pointed to something he couldn't see. "The moment you tuck them in, they merge with the original body."

"Are you sure that isn't just an artifact of the Dreamscape?" Lily didn't even bother pretending to be bored. In fact, she seemed just as fascinated as Ratu.

"It isn't." Naia's eyes were closed, her hands raised upward as if summoning the soul into her arms. "This is how stability feels to me. During the swap, small pieces are exchanged, and this is what it's like both before and after the process."

"Show me Yuki's soul." Ratu was licking her lips and pacing in anticipation as Mike tried to recreate the general shape and colors he could remember from the kitsune. Other than making some of the threads look like scattered waveforms, he made no progress.

"It's too complicated," he explained. "But here." The golden light was easy enough to tuck into the soul, some of it bleeding out.

"Wow." Ratu looked at Mike. "Are you sure we can't just get a volunteer to let us examine her soul? I bet somebody here would be happy to help."

"Not gonna happen." Mike threw the naga a hard look. He didn't like the idea of taking one of the souls in his head and picking it apart like a science project inside the Dreamscape. He also had no idea what sort of effect it might have on him or whoever the soul belonged to when they inevitably returned.

"I would love to see this in real life." Ratu shook her head. Though the ladies of the Dreamscape had access to his mind and memories, they weren't able to just ride shotgun on his shoulders like a team of devils and angels.

"I may be able to do something about that." Lily looked at Mike. "I can broadcast what you see, to some extent. It will be like watching a movie."

"We could call it Mike TV." Naia laughed. "We could see everything you do!"

"Ooh, I like this idea." Lily licked her lips. "Maybe we could set up a big screen out here so everybody could watch it."

"Later, ladies. I need to figure this out." He twisted the dimensions of the soul again until it looked reminiscent of Jack's soul. With her and Freya's permission, he had spent hours studying their unique condition. The former goddess was quite the enigma, but considering two separate personalities controlled only one leg apiece, their presence no longer threatened him.

That, and if he was being truthful, her soul was fragile enough that he wondered what would happen if he grabbed onto one of those weaker threads and just ripped it out.

"Okay, this is a mess." Ratu crossed her arms and walked back and forth. "It reminds me of something, but I can't think of what."

"A scrambled protein." Zel appeared as if by magic, a journal in her hand. She was frantically sketching the design, her eyes stuck on the soul. "It's something you'll see a lot in alchemy. You had something that looked like string, but when you cooked it, the cells changed shape."

"I would say that it's more complicated than that," Ratu began, but then nodded. "But the analogy holds true. We can't treat this as purely a magical endeavor, nor a scientific one. We tread a spiritual realm that doesn't obey logic, so must rely on ideas we can understand."

"And that's not what they look like." Cecilia was there, too, hovering up above. "Not to me, nor to Lily, or even Naia. The three of us see souls very differently than you do, and that may be part of the problem."

Mike pondered this idea for a bit. "So you're saying that how I perceive the soul somehow affects it?"

"More like your mind is translating it into something unique to you." Ratu bit her lip and then clapped her hands together. "Of course! I think I get it now!"

"You do?"

"The little spiders you make. They are a manifestation of your soul and your magic. When Velvet passed, it had a profound effect on you spiritually, and this is yet another evolution of your abilities!" Ratu explained, clapping her hands in delight.