Justin Thyme Ch. 16

Tom struggled mightily to get control of his emotions, finally realizing where Mary cradled his head, and he lifted it slowly, dazed and exhausted from the release of long pent-up emotions. Tom's voice was shaky as he said, "I'm sorry for breaking down like that. You must think terribly of me."

Mary wiped tears from her own face as she looked tenderly down at Tom. "It seems to me you've held it in far too long already, Tom. I'm glad I was here for you, and thank you for what you did for Brad."

"I had better be going. It has been a trying day for both of us. Thank you for being there for me today, and here for me this evening. Stephanie, we will make a time to get together and just talk, OK?" She nodded her response, her puffy eyes expressing her appreciation.

"Are you sure you will be OK, Tom? I'm not too sure about you being alone tonight."

"Thank you, but I'll be fine. Besides, what would your neighbors think if they saw my car in your driveway two nights in a row?"

Stephanie cast a wan smile up at Tom and said, "They would probably say 'It's about time!'"

"Stephanie Marie Winters!"

"Sorry, Mom."

Tom looked between the two of them, the one unrepentant and the other embarrassed, but not backing away. He knew he needed to get out before a battle broke out between them, and he didn't want to do anything more to embarrass Mary. He stood shakily to his feet to go, with Stephanie quickly grabbing his hand with both of hers as she stood. She stepped in to give him a hug, laying her head against his chest as she murmured softly, "Thank you for being there for my Daddy," and then she stepped back with moist eyes.

Mary gave him a soft kiss on the cheek. "Thank you, Tom. My guest room is yours if you would like."

"I know, and I really appreciate it more than you know, but I'll be OK. I'll see you in the morning?" Mary nodded and Tom turned for the door with Mary right behind him. She stood in the door and watched him back out of the driveway and then drive up the street. She stood there in the doorway, eyes unseeing, long after he was out of sight.

Finally with a sigh she turned back into the house to see Stephanie watching her silently. "Stephanie, how could you say such a thing?"

"I'm sorry it embarrassed you, Mom, but I was right, and it is about time you found someone. I don't think you could do a bit better than Tom. He obviously likes you, and I know you like him. He's no Paul!" Steph turned and walked to her room where she quickly texted me. "Can you come over for a little bit? I need you!" Stephanie sat on the edge of her bed and held the last picture she had of her father, one that was taken of him holding and kissing her goodbye. Her mother had taken that last day just before he climbed on the bus to deploy.

I got there as quickly as I could, sensing something was wrong. As soon as her mother let me in the door Stephanie came running down the hallway and launched herself into my arms weeping. Mary watched me hold her daughter and knew Steph was now mine, and she felt so alone. Who was there to hold her?

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Mom looked at Rosemary with a cocked eyebrow when I got up and left before the movie was over.

"Stephanie texted him and asked him to go over. She said she needed him."

"At this time of night?" It really wasn't that late, but I guess it was a little later than normal for a guy to go running off to his girl's home.

"Steph was having dinner with her Mom and Dr. Meechum. Dr. Meechum was in Iraq with Steph's Dad when he was killed. It must have been too much for her, so she called Justin."

"They seem to be getting pretty serious. Do we need to be concerned?"

Rosemary just smiled at Mom. "It's a little late to be getting concerned. She would say 'Yes' in a heartbeat if Justin asked. Don't worry though. They both know they have college ahead of them."

Mom looked over at Dad who just shrugged his shoulders and restarted the movie. "He's a big boy now, Honey. He's got a good head on his shoulders, and I think Stephanie is a pretty sharp young lady. I know she worships the ground he walks on."

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Susie was on the phone with Michael. "So tell me what happened, Honey. I want to know all about it."

Michael was lying back in a king-sized bed with extra pillows piled up behind him. "Nothing yet, Little One. We just got in a little while ago and had dinner. They are on Daylight Savings Time here, so they are two hours ahead of us instead of just one. Because of that we didn't get in until a little after six, and then by the time we got to the motel it was way too late to catch him at work, so we'll be there at eight in the morning. That's six our time, so it may be interesting. I might even wish for a cup of coffee or two before it's all over."

"Pete was pretty mad when I told him about getting called the way I did. He didn't say anything, but I'm glad it isn't me he's coming out to visit. He's going to introduce me as Mike Thibodeaux, an intern, so we'll see where it goes from there."

"Are you coming back tomorrow night? I sure hope so!"

"It's possible, but it looks like it will be Thursday sometime. I don't think we can get everything done in time tomorrow unless I catch a red-eye tomorrow evening. We'll have to see how it goes in the morning, but I wouldn't plan on it. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if I stay and work until about noon on Thursday. Pete knows I have to be home Thursday evening though."

"My lower lip is sticking out! You'd better hurry home and fix it!" Susie laughed, but disappointment was evident in her voice. "You have me totally spoiled, and it is all your fault. I didn't used to be this way until you came around."

"Oh? Do you want me to go away so you can go back to the way you used to be?"

"Nooooo! I like being this way! I just don't like missing you!" She made a kissing sound into the phone.

"Good. I've got to go now, Little One. Four in the morning is coming soon, and I have to meet Pete and Dave Drugan for breakfast at four forty-five our time. Good night, Little One. Don't forget I love you." He kissed the phone and waited for her goodnight before hanging it up regretfully. She wasn't the only one spoiled by the other.

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I walked into the house to find both Mom and Rosemary waiting up for me. Mom looked at me carefully before asking if everything was OK with Stephanie, and I could see Rosemary's concern as well.

"She's OK. Dr. Meechum and Mrs. Winters," I couldn't bring myself to call her Mary, at least to Mom, "both had to handle a bunch of kids from that bus wreck this morning, and they were both pretty shaken. Dr. Meechum was supposed to take them out to eat, but Mrs. Winters didn't feel up to it, and I think Dr. Meechum was pretty stressed, too, so Steph made grilled cheese and soup. She and Dr. Meechum were supposed to talk about her Dad, but all of the trauma of the day triggered his PTSD, and the evening was pretty rugged. No, he isn't violent or anything." I caught her concerned look.

"It was all emotional. He told Steph about how her father saved his life, and that he should have been given the Medal of Honor, but no officer was there to recommend him, because the Lieutenant Dr. Meechum was working on died. Steph's Dad was put in for the Navy Cross instead of the Medal of Honor, but the paperwork got lost and the medal was never awarded. Dr. Meechum said he called Marine Headquarters to see about getting the medal awarded, and then he broke down."

"Stephanie called me when he left. She really needed someone to be there for her." I looked up at Mom. "Could you give Mrs. Winters a call? I think she needs someone to talk to. She has nobody."

"This late?"

"Yeah, I think it would be a good idea. She really looked torn up when I left. I gave her a little hug, and I thought she was going to break down on me, too." Mom just nodded and went to the phone.

Rosemary walked over and gave me a hug and we could hear Mom on the phone with Mrs. Winters. "Mary, Sorry to call so late, but Justin just suggested you had a rather tough day today and you might need someone to talk with... . Yes, he is pretty caring, isn't he." I blushed. "Yes, he told me about the bus wreck, and he said Dr. Meechum was there and told Stephanie about your husband's death. I know it had to be hard... . Absolutely! It's no problem at all! Would you like to come over here, or would you rather I went there?... No, I don't mind a bit. I'll be right over."

Mom walked back into the living room and looked at me thoughtfully before she came over and gave me a big hug. "I don't know who you are, or what you've done with my son Justin, but you are pretty special. I'm going over and be with Mary for a little while. You were right. She really does need someone right now, and as much as she appreciated you and the way you were there for Stephanie, you just aren't old enough." Mom stepped back, then leaned in and gave me a big kiss on the forehead. "You have really grown up lately, Son. I'm really proud of you!"

Mom is always free with her praise, but this was way above and beyond anything she has ever said before. I couldn't help feeling a warm glow inside as Mom walked out the front door. "I'll call Dad on the way over there and tell him what's going on. I don't know how long I'll be, so let's plan on not leaving before ten or ten-thirty in the morning, OK?" I just waved goodbye as she closed the door, then Rosemary and I hugged each other before walking up the stairs together to go to bed.

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Tom Meechum walked into his empty apartment and went to the refrigerator for a beer. He pulled one out, popped the top off and started to take a drink, but at the smell stopped, looked at the bottle, and poured it out in the sink. He was not an alcoholic, but he recognized tonight was not a night he needed to crawl into a bottle. The empty feeling within came simply from the emptiness of his apartment and the loneliness he felt after leaving Mary and Stephanie.

Since returning from Iraq and finishing college, going through Medical School, then interning and residency, he had not taken the time to develop relationships with anyone. The nightmares, times of despondency, the aching sense of loss and horror from the war had not been something he felt he could share with another person who had not been there. He visited a number of therapists who encouraged him to find someone with whom he could talk, and beyond talking develop a close relationship, but he had never felt it possible to bare his soul, or to get close. Everyone with whom he had been close in the Corps either didn't come home, or they came home broken and scarred, and he had been the one to care for them, saving those he could save. Getting close to anyone frightened him, for he was afraid of losing them, too.

Tonight had been different. Tonight he had broken down and had allowed Mary and Stephanie within the horror he lived with for over ten years. Of course, Mary had been with him through today's horror with the little Kindergarten kids, and she had been what held him together on more than one occasion during the ordeal.

To be honest with himself, that first morning in their home, meeting Stephanie and seeing SSgt. Weathers' picture on the wall was the first chink in the wall of armor he had built around himself. Stephanie and Mary had done so much to assuage his pain when he saw the picture of the man to whom he owed his life. Then dinner with Mary, when Stephanie was prevented from coming home had widened the chink, causing him to take stock of his life, but it was tonight that the shell of the armor had fallen away, leaving him denuded as it were before them. Oh how he wished he could have accepted Mary's invitation, but to share her bed, rather than her guest room. He didn't want sex. What he really wanted, nay craved, was the companionship of a soul-mate that knew him fully and yet loved him.

He reached for the telephone on the wall just as Mom walked into the Weathers' home. "Mary? Look, I'm really sorry to call so late, and especially after this evening, but I just had to say 'Thanks.'"

Mary waved Mom to a seat at her kitchen table and poured her a glass of white wine to go with the one she herself had been sipping. "Not a problem, Tom. I'm glad we could be here for you." Mom signed she could leave and give Mary some privacy, but Mary shook her head 'No', waving her to the seat. "I know it was really hard for you, but it meant a lot to Stephanie to hear about her Daddy, and it meant a lot to me, too. That was Brad all the way."

"I really don't know what came over me. I normally can keep my emotions in check, but tonight I just lost it. I apologize for ruining your evening by dumping my load on you."

Mary sat down quickly, nearly overcome with emotion and the need to nurture and comfort a hurting person. Her nurse persona came out, but along with it a maternal and an almost spousal need to allay and assuage the obvious pain Tom suffered. "Tom, I think it was past time you let it out. You can't keep all of that inside. I'm here for you any time you need someone with whom to talk. It was a hard day for both of us, and I can't imagine what it was for you. I am grateful you were the one who was there though, because I don't know anyone else that could have handled the trauma the way you did."

"I couldn't have done it without you, Mary. Every time I looked up you were there, and your compassion for those kids was so calming, but not just to them. I just want you to know it meant a lot to me, also. And not only that, but you are beginning to mean a lot to me. I hope I'm not presuming on anything or rushing things, but I would like to explore a relationship with you if you would be interested."

Mary felt widely conflicting emotions. On the one hand she was afraid. Afraid of allowing another man into her life after what she just went through with Paul, and especially a man as terribly scarred as was Tom, but on the other hand she felt such a bond with Tom already. Holding his head on her breast as he wept had also broken through some barriers she had erected in her own heart, and as she had looked at Brad's picture when Tom left she felt as if Brad was bringing them together.

"Tom, I think I would like that, and I know Stephanie would be in favor. She has already said so."

Tom felt his legs begin to tremble and weaken. Quickly he fumbled for a chair and sank into it. "Thank you so much Mary. I'll see you in the morning. Good night."

"Good night, Tom." She didn't say it, but felt; "I love you," but it was entirely too soon to think of love. Love, real love, didn't come that fast. It couldn't, could it?

Mom stood and gave Mary a hug after she put the phone back on the hook. "It sounds to me like things are working out."

Mary sat back down at the table and looked at her wine glass, suddenly feeling almost giddy with relief. "Better than I could have imagined, Charlotte. Thank you so much for coming over! I don't know that I need to talk now, but I want to, if you have time."

Mom reached a hand across the table and rested it on Mary's. "Any time, Mary. I don't know how you have carried the load all these years like you have. I think it is about time something really good happened for you."

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I had been in bed for maybe fifteen minutes or so with the "Humming Chorus" from Puccini's Madame Butterfly playing softly. The pathos of this opera has always gripped me, this piece in particular. I found the melody at once peaceful, yet stirring. It really fit my mood after being with Stephanie and her mother this evening. A light tap on my door sounded, which I knew wasn't Mom, so it had to be Rosemary.

"Come in," I called out softly, so as not to be loud enough for Dad to hear. The door opened enough for Rosemary to slip through, and then she closed it carefully, using her fingers to prevent making any sound. She wore a long tee shirt, and nothing else as she padded over to my bed. The "Humming Chorus" ended as she sat and Maria Callas's rendition of "Un Bel Di" from the same opera followed. Obviously as you can tell from my choice of music, my mood was rather somber as I lay there.

"I couldn't settle down enough to sleep. May I lie down with you for a while, Justin?"

I slid over to give her room on my little twin bed and held my arm out to rest her head on my shoulder. She snuggled in close and murmured in my ear, "Thank you for taking care of Stephie tonight, and her Mom, too. You are pretty special, you know it?"

"I don't think I'm anything special," I said as Verdi's "Va Pensiero" from Nabucco started. If there is a song that carries more pathos in it than this one I don't know what it is. Don't get me wrong. I was not melancholy, just thoughtful, after sharing the pain of the one I loved and the pain of her mother.

"I think you are, and I love you for it. Thank you." She kissed my cheek and placing her arm around my chest pulled me to herself. I rolled to face her and hugged her back enjoying the comfort of the other woman that I love. What a messed up world! I'm not sorry, not at all. I'm just in fear that I will not meet the needs of these two lovely women I've been blessed with. I never ever want to do anything to hurt either of them, and I'm constantly afraid I will prove to be inadequate to meet their needs. "Do you ever think of yourself and what your needs or wants are?"

"Now don't be putting me on a pedestal an making a saint out of me or something. I can't help it that I love you two. I'm afraid you are the one getting the short end of things."

"Oh, I'm OK. I'm just glad you and Stephanie are hitting it off. I know you love me, and that's enough for now. Besides, you give me great sex, and I don't mind sharing."

"I haven't been able to do anything for you in quite a while. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I'll get my turn. I thought Stephie really needed you the last few days. Watching you two was really special! I've never been able to get myself off like I did this afternoon! I kind of wish we could try it now, but there is no way with Dad home. At this moment I'm content just being held in your arms, but we'd better not fall asleep this way. I'm really looking forward to getting back up to the house so we can sleep together, Stephie too, sometimes. I know it sounds weird, but I like to wake up on your shoulder and look across and see Steph snuggled up on the other side. I'm so lucky to be included in your love."

"You will always be my first, and as much as I love Steph she will never take that away, though I feel like a real cad sometimes."

"I don't mind, even if you do like Stephie's nipples better than mine." She gave me a big smile followed by a kiss to show what she really meant and we just snuggled together, wrapped totally in our love for the other, and I felt peaceful as I lay there with her in my arms.

As hard as we tried not to, we both fell asleep with Rosemary wrapped protectively in my arms. The garage door opener is what awakened me, and for a bit I was confused. I knew I had Rosemary in my arms, but we weren't up at the house, and the garage door opener... . I sat up with a start, waking Rosemary. "Shhhhh! Mom just got home, and we were asleep!" I whispered. "Don't move. I don't think she will come check on us. If she does we were just talking and we dozed off." Quickly I pulled on a pair of shorts, just in case, but I had trouble getting them zipped over my hard cock. Rosemary does that to me!

It's a good thing I dressed, because I heard Mom knock on Rosemary's door softly, and then I heard her call out to her and check the bathroom. Next there was a knock on my door, which I answered as if I was asleep. "Justin, do you know where Rosemary is?"

"Yeah, Mom. Come on in. She's in here with me." Mom came through the door with her eyebrows raised. "We were talking about Steph and Mrs. Winters and stuff and we both dozed off." Fortunately, I had also thrown a sheet over myself, and Rosemary wasn't under it. "Is Mrs. Winters OK?"