Mom and I Against the World

She looked up at me, embarrassed and annoyed at the same time. It took me a minute to realize that she'd set herself at my door so that she'd be right there waiting for me when I decided to come out. Helping her to her feet we sat down on my bed, the soft light of a single lamp casting our faces in long shadows.

"I'm sorry baby, I didn't mean to upset you," she said, her hand cupping my face lovingly.

"Who is Robbie?" I asked sullenly.

Mom stared at me for a long moment, swallowing hard before she answered, "Your father."

In seventeen years he'd always been 'The Sperm Donor', he never had a name and not a single time had Mom ever said anything that was remotely close to missing him. I was still torn, unsure of how to interpret what had happened. I shouldn't have worried, Mom could see the torment in my face and she was determined to make it right.

"Your father was only a few years older than me," she began. "He was a bad boy, as my mother would say, and he smoked. When I was thirteen there was nothing cooler than smoking, and your father was hotter than hot with a cigarette in his mouth. He would hang around the shop where my dad worked, always trying to find some way to make extra money to buy a pack of smokes. Daddy tried to keep him away from me, but he couldn't keep me away from him.

"One day after Robbie bought a new pack of smokes I snuck out into the alley where he would light up and I asked him to teach me to smoke. He just laughed, calling me a little girl and that I wasn't woman enough to handle smoking. Well that only made me more determined, and so I told him I was too 'woman' enough and I could prove it. He asked me how I was going to do that, but I couldn't answer him.

"After chuckling at my predicament he finally came up with an answer. He said a real woman knew how to kiss, if I showed him I knew how to do that he'd teach me how to smoke. Well, I'd kissed a few boys so I figured this was no big deal. I walked right up to him, my hands clasped behind my back and I leaned up towards his mouth, presented my puckered lips and waited.

"After what seemed like forever, I opened my eyes and Robbie was just standing there, staring at me. He blew a cloud of smoke into my face and I was so angry I called him all kinds of awful things. He just laughed at my childish name calling, saying I wasn't even woman enough to curse properly. I started to pound on his chest with my fists until he double over laughing at me.

"I was never so angry in my entire life. I stormed off and I didn't come back to the shop for a long time. When I returned, Robbie was still there, this time he was a bit nicer to me. He was working in the shop now on a regular basis and I guess he figured he'd better play nice with me. Daddy would give us stern looks anytime we talked too long and I was always being shooed out of the shop.

"One day when Daddy was gone on a trip, I went to the shop to see Robbie. There wasn't much going on, he was just waiting for someone to show up needing a tire repaired, or anything really. I asked him to teach me to smoke again, and he laughed softly, asking if I'd learned to kiss yet. I hung my head and said no, but he didn't laugh this time.

"I'll teach you to do both', he offered and we went into one of the back offices, a room with no windows and boxes piled high. He lit a match and then touched it to his cigarette, the burning tip the only source of light in the dark room. He showed me the trick of opening your mouth and letting someone blow in smoke while you inhale. And then he kissed me. His mouth covered mine and his tongue was everywhere at once. I'd never felt something so incredible in all my life, Danny. I was in love with him in a heartbeat."

Mom paused, her tale having taken its toll on her as tears streamed down her face.

"Daddy threw him out, threatened to turn him into the police after I turned up pregnant," she sobbed. "I chased after him, tried to run away with him, but he didn't want me, us." There was another long pause as she was wracked by tears again and I held her close to protect her.

"You look so much like him, so handsome, but you are so sweet, kind and loving. Everything I ever wanted."

"You've got me mom; it's you and me, against the world," I whispered.

Mom was distant for a while after that, our evening ritual of 'smoke kisses' came to an abrupt halt and I didn't press the issue. I think it was a month, maybe more, before we really opened up to each other as we had before, but I could still feel a tension between us. I didn't understand then, but it was Mom holding back. Something cracked on that night of my sixteenth birthday and that night in the bathroom had put another large split in the dam. She was keeping in check powerful emotions that I was only beginning to guess at that were stirring wildly in me.

My eighteenth birthday came upon us in the spring, graduation looming not far behind. College applications had been sent off and a few responses had come back, though many of them were for far-away places. I couldn't understand why she insisted that I apply to schools so far away, but the further they were the more she liked them. She positively squealed when I'd been accepted to Arizona State University. The scholarships were too good to turn down, so I signed the commitment letter and I'd be off across the country almost as soon as school was out.

I wasn't so excited, the prospect of leaving my mother was not one that filled me with any kind of happiness. I'd suffered from teasing at school, many of the other kids calling me names such as 'Momma's Boy' and 'panty-waist' on numerous occasions because of my devotion to Mom. My lack of dates, though I had been asked out by a couple of girls, only seemed to reinforce my social awkwardness. So it was with dread I watched the calendar count down the days to the end of school.

The last week of high school is pretty much a formality. All the tests have been taken, all that is left is for us to walk across the stage, the school's only real task was to keep us out of trouble. There were parties of all sorts and though I attended a couple, my heart really wasn't in it. Mom noticed, and though she gave me smiles and a far-away look, she wasn't much help. It was supposed to be the happiest time of my life and here I was spiraling down into a depressive pit.

The night of graduation was bitter sweet, I was happy to be done with high school, but it was marking the end of everything else that I held dear, especially my time at home. I spent my time in the bleachers staring at my mother sitting in the crowd, my heart aching as I could only think of leaving her.

My feelings for her had grown beyond anything a son should feel for his mother, I knew that. Her insistence that I leave home seemed to indicate to me that she felt it too, and felt the need to separate us before her unspoken fears came to pass. I knew exactly what she was afraid of, we'd both felt the incredible tension that had built up between us, we were either going to explode or I was going to do something that would make her hate me forever.

Graduation was over and we left the ceremony, shaking hands with a few close friends and teachers who had meant a lot to me, with my arm around my mother, my eyes unwavering from her pretty face, we walked to our car and drove home. It was quiet as we entered the apartment, loosening my tie as I stepped into my bedroom, most of my belongings packed up in suitcases by the bed. With a heavy sigh I returned to the living room and slumped onto the couch, rubbing my eyes to keep from crying.

"Care for a smoke?" Mom asked as she pulled two cigarettes from her pack. She popped one into her mouth, it hung from her lip delicately as she offered me the other. I accepted it, though I just stared at the white cylinder in my hand. The sound of the lighter was loud in my ears, the scrape of flint against steel and the quiet rush of compressed gas being released. I closed my eyes and I was sixteen again.

"Light?" she asked, holding up her pink lighter questioningly. I shook my head and pulled her to sit next to me.

"Like you taught me," I said. When she pulled on the cigarette I leaned in close, my mouth opened as I pressed my lips lightly against hers. Mom blew the smoke into my mouth and I inhaled deeply, that familiar rush and the euphoric feeling washing over my brain.

It all happened automatically, I didn't care anymore and suddenly I knew it. Pushing forward, my lips crushed against hers, my tongue swiping into my mother's open mouth. The sweetness, the absolute heaven of kissing my mother for the first time like a man, and not just her son, was better than a thousand first cigarettes. For the briefest second I feared I'd made a huge mistake, that this one kiss was going to cost me everything, but then she let out the softest moan.

Mom's hand rested on my shoulder, the cigarette burning steadily in her fingers, and then she slid it around and grabbed the back of my head, pulling me tighter against her. Our mouths opened and closed in increasing speed, our tongues battling over each other, tasting, licking, exploring the other in ways we had dreamed of for so long, but had held back with pain. I felt as if my heart was going to explode in happiness, and when we pulled back gasping for breath I wasn't surprised to see the tears streaming down Mom's face.

I cupped her face, kissing away the salty tears, my mouth drawn to hers again as I couldn't wait another moment to do it all again. I covered her lips with my mouth, sucking her in, drawing her into my body, my soul. Mom began to shiver, a quaking that was overtaking her body. It wasn't sexual, she was trembling like a leaf as I kissed her so fiercely, our bodies pressing as close as we could possibly get on that couch. I stopped, fearing that something serious was wrong, but she just looked up at me with such love filled eyes, the tears still coming unbidden and unstoppable.

"I love you," she said through whimpers, wiping at her eyes, embarrassed by her reaction.

"I can't leave you," I whispered pressing my nose against hers. The smell of her filled me with such an ache, the thought that we would be separated tearing at my heart. I clutched her tightly, my fingers digging into her flesh as I wrapped myself around her.

"I know, I know," she soothed, her breath soft on my ears as my face was buried in her bosom. She took a drag off her cigarette, pushing me away so she could find the ashtray and stub out the butt.

I leaned close to her, intoxicated by the way her eyes closed and her lips parted as she anticipated the kiss I was going to lay on her. It was as if the last two years had been prelude, the courtship to the relationship we were waking up to now, and still she was my mother, a fact I couldn't ignore for even the briefest moment.

Her hand found my thigh, the soft weight of her touch sending jolts through me as her fingers inched up towards my groin. She giggled through our kiss, a huff of air and her eyes widening as my body reacted to her unexpected, yet welcome exploration. My mouth grew dry, and I swallowed hard trying to contain myself, beads of sweat popping out on my forehead.

"I've never-" I started, my hand grabbing her wrist and holding it in place.

Mom just looked at me, her eyes sweet and understanding, "I know, baby. I know." She kissed me with a growl, her teeth biting at my lower lip gently.

"I've dreamed of this," I quaked, letting go of her hand, allowing her to continue the sweet torture of almost touching my straining manhood. She looked at me with wonder and suddenly I was afraid that I might have revealed too much, it isn't every boy who admits to his mother that he's had sexual dreams of her.

"You and me both, baby," Mom whispered, her silky tongue swiping at her painted lips as she pressed down fully on the ridge of flesh tenting my slacks. "Ooh," she cooed in apparent delight, using two hands to measure the size of my package, pressing down on the material around it to get a clearer impression of my equipment. "I want to do something special," she said quickly, scooting off the couch and setting on her knees before me.

She undid the clasp at the top of my fly and then lowered my zipper. The sound of metal against metal loud in my ears as I held my breath, mom's fingers brushing lightly over the underside of my cock, the tight briefs confining my fully extended flesh. I waited for more, my eyes closed as I breathed out, trying to relax as much as I could, but my stomach was doing flips while tied in knots.

Then I heard the familiar flick of the lighter and I looked to see that Mom had fired up another cigarette, her mouth filled with the smoke that I had grown up associating with sex. She exhaled, blowing the smoke across my opened trousers, the ephemeral cloud disappearing into my clothes and the cushion. She laughed that musical laugh again as my cock twitched, a dark spot appearing at the tip where I began to leak.

With care she peeled back the underwear, urging me to lift my butt so that she could pull my pants and briefs over my hips. My cock sprang free, bouncing to slap against my stomach once and then resting in a proud, upright position. I looked at my body and then up at Mom to see her reaction, the first and only woman to see my sex. Her look of delight filled me with confidence and I felt a surge that I could have sworn made it grow even further.

Mom glanced up at my face, a devious smile upon her lips. She took another hit on the cigarette, holding the smoke in her mouth without inhaling. I watched in fascination as she exhaled the opaque cloud over my cock, the feel of the warm air brushing my sensitive skin causing me to flex and shift in pleasure. The sight of my genitalia surrounded by the smoke that had been in her mouth was symbolic of the vicarious desire to be inside of her, to feel her lips wrapped around my aching flesh.

"Ahh, I knew you'd like that," she breathed. "You used to watch me smoke all the time; I knew what was going on in that little head of yours. Tell me baby, is it everything you thought it would be?"

I could only nod in short, jerky motions, biting my lip tightly as I tried to contain the impending explosion that threatened to release at any moment. Mom caught on to my dilemma, her eyes narrowing and lips pursing together tightly as her hand slid up my naked thigh towards my twitching cock. I let out a long gasp as her cool fingers curled around my shaft, her soft skin enveloping me in a sure grip and then she stroked me. Three long, sensuous strokes is all it took before cum shot out of my cock in a fury of pent up, never to be believed release.

Mom gasped her surprise, working my flesh steadily as she stroked me through five strong pulses and then slowly pumped out the last dribbles that washed over her hand, coating her fingers in my seed. I watched as she took another drag off her cigarette, inhaling deeply this time and then blowing across the tip of my cock, eliciting one last dollop of sticky cum to bubble forth. With a broad smile she leaned close and licked the head of my cock, leaving it clean when she withdrew her tongue.

I did not lose an inch of hardness, my desire still as strong as before as Mom proceeded to lick me clean, getting every drop of salty sweet cum into her mouth. By the time she was finished I was shaking, ready for more and becoming increasingly impatient. I clawed at her, trying to remove her jacket and blouse, her laughter taunting me as she backed out of reach.

Standing before me she motioned for me to stay reclined as she began to remove her clothing. First the jacket was tossed aside and then her high heeled shoes were kicked off carelessly. My eyes scanning up from her legs exposed beneath her skirt up to her face, lingering on the sweet breasts hidden by her silk blouse. She reached up under her skirt and worked her pantyhose off, the tan ball of nylon tossed over her shoulder as she began to unbutton her shirt.

Licking my lips, I waited breathlessly as she revealed the lacy bra that held her twin orbs of delight. I'd seen her lingerie in the laundry untold number of times, imagined how she looked in them, but my visions only paled in comparison to the beauty I beheld. Her breasts were high, tightly compact with thick round nipples, the dark circle of the areola larger than I'd seen in the magazines, but much more exciting to my taste. Mom stared down at me, her hip cocked to the side as she slid the silk off her shoulders, her creamy skin begging to be caressed and kissed.

I thought she'd undo the bra, but Mom had other ideas. Next came the skirt. A quick snap and the dragging of a zipper, once again seemingly loud in the otherwise quiet apartment, only our labored breathing a counterpoint to its dull declaration that she was revealing herself to the one person most forbidden. The soft grey material slid to the floor in a whisper, her toned body on full display for me to devour. Her pose was more erotic than any I'd seen in any magazine, her hand was on her hip, the elbow bent as she presented herself to me, confident and radiant all at once.

I stared in awe as Mom stood stock still, allowing me to drink in the sight of her, my cock wavering in anticipation as more blood pumped to it, responding to my desire to claim her. My eyes drifted over the soft curve of her hip, the high cut peach panties hugging her snugly before diving between her legs where her mound was covered in peek a boo lace that barely hid the well-trimmed hairs covering her sex. There was a small gap above where her thighs came together and I was mesmerized by the fit lines of her bare legs, the softness of them calling out for my touch.

It seemed an eternity she stood there before straddling my thighs as she moved to sit astride my body. She pressed my hardened flesh against the front panel of her underwear, the feel of the lace softly scraping against my hyper sensitive skin sending me into a fit of groans and grinding. My hands were drawn to her waist, sliding up along the hourglass curve of her figure, ending as my fingers covered her breasts. Moaning softly, Mom pressed my fingers into her flesh, encouraging my exploration as her nipples hardened rapidly, poking out from the cup like diamond tips.

"It's always been us," she whispered, her eyes misting once again as new tears threatened to spill. It was a strange dichotomy, the sight of her on the verge of crying and the feel of her steamy sex pressing down on the inner curves of my thighs. She took my left hand and brought it to where our bodies touched, the damp panties keeping us apart for the moment. Slipping my fingers between her skin and the satin material I pulled it to the side, the puffy lips of her sex coming into clear view, the fine blond hairs laying serenely against her skin. The fold of skin protruding from those tender mounds of flesh slick, evidence of her arousal confirming her desire for this union.

"Take me," she sighed and I needed no further encouragement. I pushed up with my hips, her body rising as she lifted herself up with her knees, my cock lining up with her opening while I held the panties aside, the feel of it scraping against my shaft as my girth forced her open as she brought her weight to bear. "Oh god," she shuddered, her eyes closing, but the lids fluttering wildly as she sank onto me.

"Holy christ, mother of god," I blasphemed. No delight on earth can compare to the feel of sinking your cock into your mother's sweet pussy. It was heaven and yet I knew I was committing my most grievous sin ever. It was heat incarnate, like the fires of hell licking at us while we profaned the sanctity of the home of Angels.

"Oh baby," Mom moaned, her body rising and falling, her stomach and hips undulating as she rocked her pelvis against me, my body one with hers as she had done with no man since she conceived me. She grabbed her breasts, squeezing them tightly as she continued our dance, her face contorted in delightful torture.