Mr. & Mrs. America, Aftermath

"Oh. Listen my boy, we're on a secured phone, but it's best to not say much about the project. I'll only tell you it's extremely important, and leave Sherry to fill in the blanks. Good night, all."

I looked at her as the line went dead. "I just wanted you to know what I'm about to tell you is on the level. If you decline to help, my only request is that you keep my confidences. It's important, so promise me."

"I promise."

She visibly relaxed, and motioned to a couch while she poured us a drink. I tasted mine, looking up in surprise. She grinned.

"Bourbon. Your favorite brand, fixed your favorite way, a splash of water and three ice cubes. The Dean told me."

She sat beside me, even took my hand. "What I'm about to tell you is extremely sensitive. Without going into details, you have at least a passing idea of the turmoil my region of the world is in. Dissident groups form and disband so fast many times we don't have time to name them, but some linger and grow stronger, seizing and controlling large chunks of territory in several countries. The two largest are so indoctrinated into their beliefs that anyone who offers a different opinion soon disappears. As terrible as their atrocities are to humans, they're starting to do something much worse. They've started erasing the past. Mosques, temples, monasteries, and churches are being destroyed. Many are hundreds of years old. Art and sacred objects are destroyed immediately, and they often collect antique books and scrolls for bonfires. Whole histories erased at the strike of a match!"

She paused, emotion threatening to overcome her. "Finally, a loose coalition was formed, containing Muslims, Jews, and Christians, from almost every country involved, was formed with the purpose of saving as much as we can. Lord Bevington was tasked with assembling a team to secure as many artifacts as we can, and transport them to safe locations. Every item will be held until the area is stable, and then returned. If a government arises that isn't kindly disposed to preservation, they may be held in trust until their safety can be assured"

She paused, looking for the right words. "That being said, very few people know of this project.

We're completely off the books, there will be no official record of us anywhere. I have to tell you now, what we are about to do goes against everything I've been taught. This is a snatch and grab operation, at best glorified tomb raiding. But we have to look at what happens if we don't do this. It will be gone, destroyed forever.

"I won't lie to you here, there is an element of risk in even the tiniest bit of involvement. I won't pressure you to be an active participant, but with your background, and your skill with languages, you would be invaluable at recovery sites."

She stopped to see how I was reacting. I just nodded for her to continue.

"Officially, we'll be working for the British Museum as researchers. If you choose, you can stay in the U.K., and catalog what we recover. If not, you'll be traveling a lot, to some pretty unusual places, some of them hostile. We will take every precaution humanly possible, but we can't guarantee your safety. I don't want you to answer me now, I want you to think about it long and hard. I'll call you in three days. All you have to do is say 'yes', and I'll know you're willing to be a full partner. If you say 'I'd love to consult', I'll know you're willing to spend some time with Teddy, processing our work. And if you say no, well, no means no."

We spent another ninety minutes discussing recent discoveries, old translations that were later proven false, forgeries we'd both encountered, me while working for the museum, her at her home university in her country, where our interpretations of some extinct languages differed from others. It was probably the best time I'd had since the letter.

Later, as I lay on my couch trying to sleep, I thought about the offer, and decided to take it, at the very minimum the research and cataloging part. Maybe an extended time away from my 'family' would allow me to be objective about the whole thing. Just before I slept the thought popped into my head about how strongly Mike would advise against it. It would be too close to his reality for comfort. It made me smile, and allowed me to slip off into slumber.

...

I woke up at seven the next morning, disoriented, as the sound of the door being hammered registered. By the time I answered, my thoughts were ordered.

Jo practically fell through the door, latching on to me like she never intended to let go, crying the whole time. I let her babble until she was through, hearing multiple professions of love and entreaties to return home, but as carefully as I listened, I never once heard an apology. When she was done, I held her at arms' length and looked her in the eyes.

"Did you think about what I asked when we talked last?" She looked down and said something so low I couldn't hear. I asked her to speak up.

"Yes, I did think about it. I would have been furious, you know my goal since we met was to be a lawyer. I knew in my heart that I would be very good at it, and I am. If you had manipulated me into doing something else and I found out later, even if you said you did it out of love, I would have still been furious. I admit that. But what I do isn't dangerous, and it wouldn't have destroyed my soul."

"Really? You think you're the same person now you were when this all started? Bullshit. The horrific hours you've had to work, the jerks you've had to work with and for, the people you've destroyed to achieve the ends your bosses required, have left you cynical, even bitter at times. You can deny it all you want, but I've lived with you while it's been happening, and at least I could see it.

The pro bono work you were so adamant be part of any contract fell by the way pretty quickly, didn't it? Just guessing, but I'm pretty sure you haven't done any pro bono work in at least fifteen years. So much for saving the world. I even asked you a few times when it was really bad if you might be happier in another branch of law, but you blew me off, trying to achieve your dream."

I paused to see if any of what I was saying registered on her. Apparently not. I could see the lawyer in her analyzing what I was saying, preparing her response.

"With what you've told me, how can still believe that what you did was right? I think you did love me, and wanted me safe, but again, IT WAS NOT YOUR DECISION TO MAKE! I think now that maybe you wanted security, a nice quiet little man with a nice quiet little life. Come on now, admit you liked trotting me out at all those parties and dinners you dragged me to and introducing your world renowned college professor husband. What would you have done if it had gone differently? Introduce me as someone who works for the government doing God knows what God knows where? It wouldn't have helped your career much, would it now?"

She flushed, and I realized I had hit upon something she had thought about. She didn't even offer an argument.

"You know, the more I think about it, the more I think this was more about your goals than keeping me safe."

She flinched, and denied it violently. "NO! I admit, I'm proud to introduce you as someone at the top of their field, but if you had chosen to be a plumber, I would still be proud of you! It wasn't about me, it was about keeping you safe. Please, please, understand me here, we did it for you."

"Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. Platitudes and lies, and after twenty three years I've had my fill of them. If there is any way we're able to stay together, you better start being honest with me. And don't throw up how wonderful our life has been, because it turns out it wasn't really my life, it was your construct about how my life was to go. And don't bring the children into it, I'm sure whatever path I'd taken, the children would have still been there, and I would have loved them just as much. You know, talking about the kids pisses me off, after all it was the monstrous lie you told about being pregnant that trapped me into this marriage to start with."

She flinched like I'd slapped her. The tears came in earnest then. "Please don't say that! It wasn't like that at all, it wa..."

"It was about the most horrible thing to do to a man that can be done. Oh, I fully intended to marry you, you knew that. But I wanted to get established in my career first. That didn't mesh with your plans though, did it? You needed to hook me right away, to save me from myself. You, Mike, my so called father, you all knew my sense of honor. You all knew I'd do the right thing. I was actually happy, can you believe that? I couldn't wait to see our daughter. It had to be a daughter, didn't it? You knew my fondness for your sister's little girl, another carefully constructed exploitation on your part. I always wondered why you weren't showing at least a little. I lay awake nights, wondering if she was all right. But enough about that. I promise you, sometime in the future we're going to have a long, long talk about this."

For the first time, I think she truly understood the damage they had done. Fear was evident in her expression. "Please, Pete. Come home. Let me start making this all up to you. Please, honey, please."

I couldn't believe it. She wanted to make it all right, to make it all go away.

"As curious as I am about how you could possibly make up for over two decades of lies, I really don't think we should be together right now. It's still too raw for me. I'm afraid my anger and pain would keep me lashing out at you until I hit the point of no return. I may as well tell you now, the British Museum has offered me a short term assignment analyzing some new scrolls they recently acquired. The scrolls are extremely fragile, they really took a chance bringing them into their country, so I need to travel to them. I've decided to take it. The Dean has given me a year's sabbatical, and I'm taking it. I leave right after finals."

Jo looked stricken. "There's no way I can take time off to go with you. We're at a delicate phase in the negotiations for our newest acquisition, and I simply can't leave now."

"I didn't expect you to. After all, we know how hard you've worked in your career, and how much it means to you. And I didn't invite you. We, I, need this time apart."

I think she had a fugue moment. Her eyes went vacant, her mouth moved but no words came out. She came to herself and asked in a quiet voice how long I would be away. I shrugged.

"Until it's done, and I don't know how long that will take. It may be until school starts again. Maybe longer."

...

She was shaken, shaken to her very core. In all her constructs of what could possibly happen, this was one scenario she didn't envision. Never once did she consider I may be hurt enough or have the backbone to just walk away. For the first time I think it occurred to her this might not end well.

The tears were real this time, not self serving tears, but tears of the truly lost. There was no way she could spin this, no way she could manipulate me into changing my mind. I think she realize at that instance every thing she said to me going forward would never again be taken at face value. I'd always be looking for her agenda, what she hoped to accomplish, what she really wanted to happen. For the very first time, I think she felt regret for what she'd done. I let her cry it out, even held her there at the last.

Jo could tell the difference in me now. Before, I would have been soothing her, rubbing her shoulders, telling her everything would be all right. Now I just held her, letting her cry it out. She finally pulled out of the hug and rushed to the bathroom. I heard retching sounds. Was she actually voiding her stomach? Maybe there was a real human being in there after all.

She stayed there for another ten minutes, repairing her face. Jo almost tiptoed out, the first time in years I'd seen her look timid.

"I need to say this. I did what I thought was right, because I couldn't stand the thought of losing you. Now, I realize maybe we took the wrong approach. Damn Mike! If he had just said goodbye, none of this would have been happening. Why did he do such a thing to us?"

For the first time I felt sad for her. "I think it was like he said. He had become morally corrupt, and this was him getting revenge for the things he'd missed. He wanted every one he knew to be miserable along with him. Fuck him! I was never truly his friend, a friend would never do what he did. Or you. Or my sperm donor. We were just means to an end."

I noticed she used the word regret. Still no apology. I wondered if she knew how truly important it was to me to actually hear her apologize and mean it? Probably not. She was still convinced of her own rightness.

"Will we see each other before you leave?"

"Of course we will. It will be at least four weeks, the semester has to end, plans have to be made. But it will be as soon as possible. Some of those scrolls may contain things as yet undiscovered. Lord Bevington is pretty worked up about them, I can already see his paper in the leading journals. And I intend to pressure all the kids to come home, for at least a weekend."

"Are you coming home?"

She said it quietly, but her body language told me she was very anxious to hear my response. "Yes. I don't want to spend my last nights before I leave apart. But it won't be tonight. You'll know when you come home and see me on the couch."

Jo just looked at me with a blank expression, before going out the door.

It was three more days before I went home. Jo was overjoyed, but got a shock when she came to bed in her sexiest gown, and I just turned out the light and turned my back to her. I heard her sniffling a few times before I dozed off. Over breakfast, something she normally didn't fix now that the kids were gone, she asked if I was still attracted to her.

I eyed her critically. She weighed three pounds less than she did before the kids, mostly to an almost addiction to her exercise regimen. Dressed conservatively but attractively, hair perfectly styled, makeup perfect, not a gray hair to be found. She looked to be midthirties, ten years younger. Still beautiful, to me.

"I think you're hotter now than you were twenty years ago. It's not a physical thing. I still want you, I always will. But mentally, it's going to take a while before the intimacy returns. Sorry, but every time I look at you I wonder how many times you, sperm donor, and good old Mike made fun of me over the years. Rage and humiliation aren't exactly aphrodisiacs. So be glad we're sharing a bed and a house, and don't push it."

The lawyer in her wanted to argue, but I think she realized it would be a bad mistake. Instead she told me she was willing to wait, but when the time came she intended to destroy me with her passion.

...

I finally had the kids all coming to spend the weekend. Polly was always the one closest to me, and when she found out our dinner didn't include her grandparents, she knew something was off. She strode in to my office, telling my assistant it was urgent she speak to me, and slammed the door.

"All right , Pops, spill. What the hell is going on? I went by to see my grandparents and it was like an episode of The Twilight Zone. Grandma burst into tears when she found out we were all here, and going to dinner without them. Grandpa just sort of talked around everything. Did you know he broke his nose? And Mom, well, let's just say the woman who is always on top of every situation is jumping at shadows."

Damn perceptive kids anyway. "Your Mom and I have hit a rough patch, honey. Something from the past, a huge secret she and my parents kept from me suddenly came to light recently, and it was very disturbing to me. Don't worry, no one is talking divorce or anything along those lines, it's just taking me some time to come to grips with it. If you want more, get it from Mom, because that's all I'm willing to say."

She fumed, threatened, wheedled, but I stood firm.

We had a very enjoyable meal at their favorite restaurant. Back home, Jo and I sat together while I told them I'd be away for at least the summer, an opportunity like the one I was offered rarely came along, and I was honored to be chosen. Josh thought it was cool, Jessica seemed unimpressed, but Polly grew really quiet. As the evening broke up she caught me alone.

"Please, please, tell me you're coming back, that my parents are still together, that everything will be all right between you two."

I comforted her. "It's just a temporary thing, baby. I did something like this a long time ago, before you were born. Time will pass, and I'll be home so fast you won't even miss me."

"I'm not a baby anymore, Pops. Please, fix whatever is wrong, I don't want to have to take my future children to two separate houses for holidays."

I kissed her nose, something that always made her giggle, and told her that would never happen. I hoped I was right.

That night, we made love for the first time since I'd read the letter. It was familiar and strange at the same time. She seemed desperate at times, frantic in her movements. God, I still loved her. I just hoped it was enough, and that I could get over her lack of guilt.

They all went to the airport to say goodbye. I had packed light. It was in my mind to get a few new suits while I was there, I'd done it twenty years ago and they had lasted ten years.

I kissed the girls and hugged Josh. They nearly had to peel Jo off me there at the end. As I walked away I glanced up, and saw my parents standing on the concourse above me. I deliberately showed no emotion. Mom was crying her eyes out, but sperm donor looked defiant and sad at the same time. I thought about it later. Was I deliberately trying to make them suffer? Probably. Did they deserve it? Definitely.

...

England, the part I was in, had changed little in twenty years. The labs were newer, definitely more sophisticated, but the reading rooms were basically the same.

Lord Bevington greeted me like the old friend I was, and showed me to the flat they had provided for me. A studio, it was still spacious and bright. He gave me three days to settle in, then we had our first meeting, and he introduced the team they had put together.

Sherry was there, with a young woman she introduced as her assistant. Fatima was barely twenty-one, spoke excellent English, and was dressed in western clothes, a snug top and tight jeans.

Emil Farouk was a Syrian, now living in Egypt. He wore the traditional robes of his people. My age roughly, a couple inches shorter and lean as a greyhound. I found he had an affinity for antique weapons. Back when Mike and I were young we took martial arts to give us a leg up when we started our careers. I had stayed with it, mostly for the exercise. I taught Emil and the rest of the group some dirty tricks over time, just in case. Emil taught me swordplay, taking me through the Persian Manual Of Arms, a system thousands of years old but still very effective. He would usually best me unless I reverted to my training, and when I beat him he demanded to be taught how I'd done it. He was a brooding, intense man, rarely smiling, unless he was training. He held a PhD in Middle Eastern history.

Moshe Ben Abrams was an Israeli, a professor at the university in Tel Aviv. About five nine, he had a florid face and was naturally bald. He was also a major in the Israeli Army. He and Emil were old friends, and tended to partner when studying artifacts, arguing almost constantly.

Said El Harrak was a Kurd, a large, imposing man who didn't smile a lot. He'd intended to be an Iman, but the political climate of his homeland turned him into a warrior instead. Mostly self taught, he had an amazing memory and an almost unnatural ability to grasp the shifting politics of the region. He was also a distant cousin to Fatima, who it turns out was Turkish, from just over the border.