My Wife's Annoying Sister

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My sister-in-law and I finally agree on something. Fucking!
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Author's note: This is a submission for the 2018 Valentine's Day contest. Thought I would try something a little different for once, so please read, vote, and tell me what you think in the comments section below. Enjoy!

***

"Sher!"

I hurriedly took off my shoes as I stepped through the doorway to the humble little apartment that I share with my wife.

"Sher! Your dirty mind almost ruined me today! Mrs Thomas asked for the butter at lunch and I almost asked her if it was for her dog!"

I had a wicked smile on my face as I stepped across the living room to the kitchen where-

"Well Sherry isn't home, Thomas, but you've gotta tell me about this butter thing," the timid redhead retorted, her eyes alight and a gleaming smile on her face.

"Fuck, Carrie. Why are you always here?" I muttered with annoyance, and the redhead's smile quickly shifted into a grimace, as she glared at me.

"You said I could come whenever!" she shot back.

"Yeah- but when I said 'whenever' I didn't realize it would mean 'every waking second of my life.' Fuck! Where is Sherry anyway?" I asked, trying to contain my annoyance.

Carrie was my wife's little sister, but her peskiness and insistence on always being around was much more than I'd ever bargained for.

"She got called back for a late shift."

"She what?!"

My wife had only recently completed the practical aspects of her medical degree, and half of her time seemed to be spent at the hospital or on call recently.

I knew it couldn't be helped, but today was Valentine 's Day.

Not only had we planned something special for the night weeks in advance, but we'd been holding off on sex all week to make the night extra steamy, as had become our tradition over the past couple years.

I sighed.

Her late shifts ended at two am, and she'd already worked from six am this morning till two in the afternoon.

By the time she got home I'd be lucky if she could say a word, much less have sex.

I was both annoyed and feeling the early onset of what was sure to be a porn filled night of unsatisfying sexual frustration.

I kicked at the base of the nearby counter, and Carrie stared at me blankly.

"You're sure act like a little kid sometimes," she muttered, and I ignored her, going to the fridge and taking out a cold brew.

"You're one to talk. Valentine's date stood you up? Or was no-one that desperate for once this year," I asked.

I braced for the comeback, but when it never came I glanced over at her warily.

Carrie was Sherry's junior by three years, but what my wife had in sheer blossoming beauty, Carrie inherited meek features that while being far from ugly, never really stood out.

Her face was small and round, her body petite.

Her breasts barely showed when she wore loose clothes, even if she went braless, and her lanky frame didn't quite exude the kind of dripping sexuality that her sister's body did.

Her eyes fluttered a little, before she looked up from the countertop and gave a half-hearted shrug.

"I got nothing," she responded, and I turned away from the kitchen feeling strangely awkward, for once, about the jibe.

As I sat down to enjoy my brew, I realized that my jabs were probably mean, but Carrie had never seemed to care much.

We'd chastised each other at almost every possible opportunity, and there never seemed to be any limit as to what was considered too far.

Had I gone too far today?

I didn't think so.

Surely I'd told her much, much worse.

But there certainly seemed to be something on her mind.

I thought for a moment about chatting it out with her, but a heart to heart with Carrie was probably the last thing I needed right now.

All jokes and jabs aside, we were scarcely each other's favourite person, so I turned on the television and started browsing through my Netflix for something good to watch.

Ideally, I would have just stripped down, put on some good porn, and whittled the evening away getting wasted; but with Carrie here that wasn't really an option.

Eventually, I settled on some raunchy new anime series that was in my to-watch list.

It was risqué enough to indulge my sexual appetite just a little, but not so bad that Carrie could complain if she walked in, and knowing her it was only a matter of time before-

"Watcha doing?"

I was barely through the second episode when Carrie poked her head into the living room, and I sighed.

"Baking a cake. What does it look like I'm doing?" I asked, and she plopped down on the couch opposite the one on which I was seated.

"Is this anime?" she asked, and I nodded, doing my best to ignore her, but I knew full well that a deluge of annoying questions was sure to follow.

"I never understood what you two have with this junk... it's all so weird and stupid," she commented smugly, and I rolled my eyes.

"Well you never did have good taste anyway," I replied, and even as she glared at me I ignored her and continued watching the screen.

But just then a flashy action sequence quickly gave way to one of the raunchier moments, and I cringed as the female heroine fell before the burly muscled, antagonist, and the man grasped her from behind, before tearing the skimpy suit she wore, exposing one of her breasts.

"You lived like a pampered princess all your life! Maybe you should learn what it feels like to be a common whore!"

I gulped as I read the subtitles, thankful that the words were being spoken in Japanese and so not drawing Carrie's immediate attention, but my relief was short lived as she glanced at the screen, and her eyes went wide, before a curious smile crept across her lips.

"Oh? Now this is interesting," she muttered, and I groaned in frustration.

"We have another tv in the bedroom," I muttered suggestively, "maybe you should go watch something else-"

"Trying to get my in your bedroom? Ha, in your dreams!" she snapped, and I groaned at her deliberate misunderstanding of my suggestion.

"What is this anyway?" she asked, as the man in the show grasped the girl's breasts and fondled them roughly.

"Please. Anyone? Save me!" the girl cried out in that tired old fashion, and to my relief the hero made his dramatic appearance.

"Curse you, villainous scum! Unhand this innocent girl and face me!"

"Ahaha. You fell right into my trap!"

To be honest, it was usually at moments like this that I'd wish the villain would have his way with the heroine a little longer, since the rescue of the hero usually meant the sexiness was just about done, but this time I was just relieved that I didn't have to endure anymore discomfort with Carrie sitting across from me.

"Aww. Is that all?" Carrie asked, and I groaned despite internally agreeing with the sentiment.

"Yes. Now shoo. Go watch something else in Sherry's room," I chided her, but as the episode came to an end and I headed to the kitchen for another brew, she followed me to my dismay.

"That was kinda hot. Is there any more of that weird Japanese shit like that?"

"Like what?" I asked, my reflexive annoyance at her questions quickly taking precedence.

"Like when the big bad guy groped the shit out of that unbelievably stacked chick."

I sighed.

"Probably. Who knows?"

"Seriously? You watch this shit all the fucking time, I'd think you'd have a list of references just ready and waiting at this point."

"Christ. Do you have any idea at all, how much anime is out there? I've probably not even seen one percent of it," I muttered, and Carrie stared at me in genuine shock.

"You're serious?" she asked, disbelievingly, and I rolled my eyes again as I opened up my second beer for the night and took a swig.

"When you ask stupid shit like this I sometimes wonder how you and Sherry are even related," I muttered, and Carrie screwed her face up at me.

"Fuck you!" she yelled, and I quickly noted that it was the second time that evening that she took my insult really seriously.

"So what? Just because I don't like anime? Lots of people don't! Yet everyone is 'Sherry this' and 'Sherry that', like if I give a fuck! Hell if I sucked dick on the first date every time like she does everyone would probably like me too!" she yelled.

"Hey! Watch how you talk about Sherry," I warned her, but she was shaking from anger and I quickly realized again that there was something else going on here.

I'd known Carrie for almost as long as I did Sherry, and I knew she didn't hate her sister.

I let out a long sigh.

"Okay. What gives?" I asked, and Carrie eyed me incredulously.

"What?" she asked.

"What's your problem?" I continued, but she stormed away with a frustrated, 'ugh!'

I sighed.

Carrie might be annoying but maybe you need to take a slightly more diplomatic approach.

I followed her to the guest room where she'd sleep whenever she stayed over.

She was lying on the bed, her face buried in a pillow, and her feet kicking back and forth agitatedly on the bed.

"Come on, I'm being serious. Talk to me," I tried again, and she eyed me angrily.

"Go away!" she called, and I sighed.

This is my fucking house, I thought to myself.

Carrie was always like this.

Sometimes she acted like if she didn't really understand that she was constantly getting in the way and making a nuisance of herself, but Sherry felt sorry for her and I wasn't exactly the type to just turn her away heartlessly either.

That being said, she was a bit of a bitch nonetheless.

I was still mulling over what to do next when the doorbell rang, and to my surprise Carrie leapt off of the bed and dashed straight for it.

"Fucking hell, what makes you think it's for you?" I muttered to myself, as I polished off my second beer and threw out the bottle, following her to the door.

I got there just as a courier was trying to hand her an extravagant bouquet of flowers, and I cursed as I suddenly remembered the surprise I'd ordered for Sherry.

"Uh, hold on-" I started, as the man presented the gift in earnest to Carrie, along with an assortment of chocolates and a specially written note that I'd prepared.

As I signed for the delivery and quickly rushed him out the door, I turned my attention to Carrie who seemed to be even more distressed than she was before.

I sighed.

"What were you expecting?" I asked, and she shook her head.

"I told him I was going to be here if he changed his mind," she muttered, dejectedly. "I thought..."

Her words trailed off as a tear formed in her eye, and I sighed again.

Even in this situation, I really didn't want to be comforting Carrie.

"Who's 'him'?" I asked.

"The guy I went out with last Saturday."

"I thought you two had fun?"

"We did. We went out twice since then. But..."

"But?" I asked, my impatience getting the better of me despite my best efforts.

"He- uh. He didn't wanna hang out today. Kept making excuses, and it turned into a fight," she explained, and I sighed.

He obviously had someone to spend the day with.

God, this was so typical of Carrie.

She always got carried away over someone without seeming to realize that she was their 'extra'.

I had no idea how a single human being could be dumb enough to continuously find themselves in that same idiotic position over and over, but as she stood there, holding onto the flowers and chocolates that I'd ordered for Sherry, she looked so sad I actually felt pretty bad for her despite it all.

She put down the flowers on the table and headed sheepishly for the couch, when an idea occurred to me.

I quickly picked up the flowers, then went over to her.

"Happy Valentine's Day, dumbass," I muttered, and she blinked twice, before screwing her face up at me.

"What is this supposed to be?" she asked, an eyebrow raised.

"Sherry isn't gonna be home to get the present. So I'm giving it to-"

"No I get that, but jeez. You're in your slacks and handing me another girl's gift just like that. Isn't this the part where you go all out, dress up, make me a romantic dinner or take me out somewhere fancy, and show me all the wonderful romance that you've been showering my sister with for all these years?"

"Yeah, fuck that. Take the flowers or don't, uh-"

My words trailed off as she teared up again and gave a little whimper, and I sighed.

"Ugh. Jeez, fine! But Sherry and I weren't going out."

"Of course you weren't. You've been married for seven years now. You were probably gonna fuck like bunnies till the break of dawn, but I need to be romanced!" she announced, and I groaned.

I shot her an 'I'm not sure yet that I even want to be nice to you' glare, then headed off for the shower.

"Sherry better be ready to do some seriously kinky stuff to make up for this," I muttered to myself as I bathed begrudgingly, then Carrie suddenly called out to me:

"You better shave too!"

"What?"

"I. Said. SHAVE!" she called, and I brushed the stubble on my face gingerly.

"I don't even do this much to get some when I really want it," I grumbled to myself.

Although...

With nothing to do, and no end to Carrie's gloomy company in sight.

What the Hell, right?

How much worse could this possibly be than the gloomy afternoon alone I was stuck with anyway?

Besides, maybe if I go all out I could really get Sherry to owe me one.

"You're so amazing! Doing that for my little sister!" Sherry would greet me with sparkly, anime girl eyes.

Hell, maybe I could guilt her into a threesome with that hot nurse from the clinic who keeps checking me out!

I smiled at the possibilities as I started getting dressed, but as I stepped out of the room I noted that outside seemed to be strangely quiet.

"Carrie?" I called, despite the feeling that I was walking out into an empty apartment.

I scanned all of the rooms, then noticed a note left on the table.

Went home to get dressed. Pick me up at 6. Ciao!

That was less than an hour from now, but I was still dressed and had nothing to do.

I groaned.

Too long to wait it out, yet not enough time to watch a quick vid and rid myself of some of my 'tension'.

I took of my shirt and loaded up the next episode of my anime to pass the time, then headed out to pick her up at her parents' house.

"Don't wait up~!" she called, as she climbed into my car, and I shot her a quick glare.

"They know what my car looks like," I chided, but she waved away my concern.

"They don't give a fuck anyway," she muttered.

Carrie was wearing a ridiculously short lacy, red, halter dress, and I shot her an uncomfortable glance as I pulled out of the driveway.

"You like?" she asked, holding her hands up and displaying her dress a little, and I rolled my eyes.

"You look like that chick that everyone banged on prom night," I muttered, and she folded her hands angrily.

"Do you always have to be so-"

"Honest?"

"Yeah! It wouldn't kill you to lie a little sometimes."

"See, that's why you can't find yourself a half-decent man," I countered, and she folded her hands angrily, looking out of the passenger side window with a defiant 'hmph!'

"Where are we going anyway?" I asked, and she glared at me angrily.

"What the hell kind of a man takes a girl out for Valentine's dinner without knowing where they're going? Honestly!" she complained, and I rolled my eyes again.

"Sherry and I were going to stay in, remember? Do you honestly think we would have gotten reservations anywhere on short notice?"

I sighed.

Logic just wasn't working on this girl tonight.

"How about Bello's?" I asked, and she glared at me.

"The fucking pizza place?"

"Yeah. Pizza is nice," I countered.

"I am not going to Bello's dressed like this."

"Dunno why you dressed like that to begin with," I countered, but as I glanced at her I suddenly realized that she'd not only dressed up, but she seemed to have put on a fair bit of make-up too.

Wait.

Did she do her hair?

She definitely didn't have time to do that.

I racked my brain a bit, then realized that her hair had probably been done all evening.

Come to think of it.

I'd never seen Sherry get ready in under an hour when she was dressing out, and she was fairly quick compared to most girls that I knew.

Carrie had been prepared to go on a real date tonight, hadn't she?

I sighed.

"Maybe we can call around and see if we can score some seats on a cancellation or something," I muttered, and she turned back to me, a little surprised smile on her lips.

"Okay," she agreed, giving a little nod, and I pulled over at the next safe location to make a few calls.

To my surprise, we lucked out and scored a reservation at one of the most popular steakhouses around.

"Steak?" Carrie initially complained, "That's hardly romance food, is it?"

"What the fuck is 'romance food'?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"An uncultured buffoon like you would hardly know," she countered, and I rolled my eyes at her.

"Just be glad we're getting to go anywhere," I muttered, but as we pulled into the restaurant, her mood seemed to improve significantly, and the litter of couples enjoying their respective romantic evenings quickly infected her.

Her excitement however only added to the damper that the atmosphere put on my mood.

Sherry and I would have been having a blast about now.

But here I am instead, accompanying the most annoying human being ever placed on this planet.

We got to our seats, and Carrie shot me a glare even as I made sure she was seated before joining her.

"Do you have to glare at me so much?" I asked with annoyance, and she smiled nonchalantly.

"I'm keeping you on your toes," she commented, ordering some pretty expensive wine before even settling in.

Not that that was anything new.

Carrie had been loafing off of us for some time now.

But it was still annoying the way she went about things, as if it was only natural.

I pulled out my phone and sent a quick message to Sherry to 'update' her on what was up, but not even my earlier messages had been read so I imagined it was probably a chaotic night for her as well.

When she got called out like that, it usually was.

"Are you going to stare at your phone all night?" Carrie immediately asked, and I scowled.

"Yeah."

"Oh come on, let's talk! We're having a nice dinner in a place that's not half bad."

"We have about as much in common as Donald Trump and any Mexican. What could we possibly talk about?" I asked, and she frowned at me.

We made a few more half-hearted attempts at conversation before Carrie seemed to give up, and that glum expression appeared on her face again, but as dinner was about over and we were just sitting around slowly getting more and more drunk on the wine, I suddenly noticed that her mood seemed to abruptly change.

She stole a glance off to the left then smiled, and as I followed her gaze I noticed that she seemed to be flirting with a guy, two tables across.

It took little more than a quick glance to notice that there was a ring on his finger, and he was probably having dinner with his wife.

She was however nowhere to be seen, and as Carrie waved at him a little I groaned.

"Jealous?" she asked, and I rolled my eyes at her exaggeratedly.

"Watching you make bad life choices is painful, even as a bystander who has no fucks to give," I muttered, and she frowned, suddenly regarding my words thoughtfully.

"I wasn't planning on doing anything," she countered defensively, and I stretched, before signalling to the waiter that we were ready for the cheque.

"Then why bother flirting?" I asked, and she frowned.

"Hey, you have no idea what it's like out there for us single folk," she muttered, and I yawned, the alcohol induced drowsiness kicking in.