O.I.N.D. GILF

"Did not," sneered Katt. "Grandma he's still got all of his clothes on so I can see nothing serious happened. I won't say anything to daddy or the family, but you owe me one. And you need to stay away from my boyfriend."

"Ex Boyfriend," I said again. "And Katt, we're not together anymore."

"Since when?" she shrieked.

"Since last night, when we stopped by your apartment and found you fucking three guys," said Kath.

"Oh," said Katt visibly paling. "That was a mistake. It just happened. Don't get upset, it was only sex. It had nothing to do with love. I love you Ray. I don't love any of them. I just did it to get Darren to help me with my grades."

"So you did a gangbang with him and a couple of his friends for a 'C'?" I asked. "At least you should have held out for a B+."

"Ray, we can work this out. Don't be angry. It didn't mean anything," she whined.

"I'm not angry, Katt," I said. "I'm relieved."

"You are?" she asked.

"Hell yeah," I said going over to my TV. "Look."

She followed me over to the TV and saw me reaching into the back of it. It was my best hiding place because Katt didn't care how anything worked. If something didn't do what it was supposed to do, she just called me and I either fixed it or got another one.

Her eyes widened as I pulled out the box.

"Shit, I had gotten so into the whole engagement thing that I actually was going to ask you to marry me when we graduated," I told her. "That would have been a nightmare. Now that I think about it, I'm sure that you'd have been cheating on me even after we got married. So in a way you saved me from a lot of heartache down the line."

She looked at me but didn't say anything. She was still staring at the box.

"Thank you Katt," I said with mock seriousness. "If not for you my life would have been hell. Imagine me married to a cheating skank who never really loved me."

"But I do love you," she whined. "We need to talk this over after my Granny is gone."

"We have nothing to talk about Katt," I said. "Have a great life." I crossed the floor and opened the door for her.

"Wait until I tell Daddy," she said to Kath.

"I hope you do," said Kath calmly.

"You do?" said Katt confused. This was not working out for her at all.

"Think about it," said Kath. "It makes my life easier, and saves me money at the same time. It's exactly what I want." She paused for a second and grabbed my hand. She pulled me over to my couch and sat down on me as Katt watched.

"Sooner or later, your dad, my son Thomas, is going to find out about Ray and me. He'll be shocked, of course. But eventually he's going to have to get used to it. Ray and I are going to be friends for a long time, I hope. The sooner your dad and his brothers adapt to it the better for all concerned."

Katt was stupefied listening to her grandmother.

"Then there's the fact of how this will affect you," said Kath. "Of all of my granddaughters I never would have expected you to be the suicidal one."

"What?" asked Katt. "What are you talking about?"

"Well you are in effect, cutting your own throat, twice," said Kath.

"How am I doing that?" asked Katt sitting down next to us.

"Well when you run home and tell your father, he'll call me. Like I said he's going to find out about Ray and me sooner or later. If it's sooner, that's a problem for you because my old brain doesn't work as fast as it used to. So I wouldn't be able to figure out a way not to tell him about you using the apartment he's paying for as some kind of low budget academic brothel. I'm sure he'd be really pissed when he hears about how you spend your nights."

"You wouldn't dare tell him that," hissed Katt.

"Yep, I would," hissed Kath right back at her equally venomously. "And trust me; I'm old enough to do whatever the hell I want. No one pays my bills or supports me. Can you say the same? So you'll end up in a hell of a lot more trouble than I will. And you'll have caused yourself an even bigger problem."

"What's that?" asked Katt. She'd grown a lot paler since she started listening to her Grandmother.

"Well honey, you'll have made an enemy of me. So when I do die, you wouldn't get nearly as much as you think you're going to get, especially with you being my most special granddaughter and named after me."

"Okay Granny, I won't say a word," said Katt very sweetly. She stood up. "Ray Honey, I'll call you tomorrow so we can talk."

"Don't bother, I told her. "We're still done."

She left angrily and Kath started rubbing the front of my jeans. "It looks like all of the excitement deflated your mood," she said kissing me. "Are you okay?"

"I'm just Skippy," I said.

"Don't worry, we'll have plenty more time for that in Hawaii." she smiled.

Hawaii was great. I had never had a better time in my life. Before we'd even settled into the hotel or had any kind of sex, I'd discovered something that Kath had known since the first night at the concert. The two of us, despite our age difference, were made for each other. We had the same temperament and liked most of the same things. In the few areas that we differed, we were both willing to bend and to blend.

One area where there was no need to bend or to blend was in the bedroom. We were all over each other all of the time. I was a young man with a young man's needs, and Kath was making up for lost time. It had been a very, very long time for her and she was trying to make up for it and try out all of the things she'd read about or heard about.

There was literally nothing that she wouldn't try. It was very refreshing for me. I was able to really just let go with her and be myself. With her granddaughter I'd often felt like I was trying to pretend or behave in a certain way so I wouldn't lose her. With Kath, I was under no illusion. I knew she was all mine just as much as she knew that she owned me completely. We did things that were illegal in some states but we only did them with each other.

We stayed in Hawaii for three weeks, and then I reported to my summer job at NJA. Mr. Johnson himself came down to the office to meet me on my first day. I busted my ass there and was soon being entrusted with things that many of the other interns never got to do.

My parents were disappointed that I didn't go home for the summer but realized how important the job was. I don't think they realized the switch when I finally told them that I was in love with Kathryn. "That's nice dear," my mom said. "Do you think she's the one?"

Without hesitating I told her I was sure. "What makes her so special?" my mom asked me.

"Well mom," I said. "She's one of a kind. Often Imitated, Never Duplicated." I laughed remembering where I'd heard that. After I hung up the phone I realized that she thought I was still referring to the granddaughter.

Kathryn bought a condo here in town to live in. We had a big barbecue as a house warming party. Kathryn had warned me that there would probably be fireworks involved. She'd invited her entire family. It was really intended as a dual purpose event. First it was a way of showing her new home to her family. And secondly to let them all know about me.

Naturally Katt's family would be the first to arrive. Katt's dad greeted me warmly when he saw me as he usually did. Her mother simply stared at me.

Kath said, "Honey why don't you get the grill started." Thomas and I moved at the same time.

Thomas smiled and said, "Thanks for trying to help out Ray, but I think she was talking to me."

"Thomas, you can help Ray if you want to, but it is his grill," smiled Kath.

"What do you mean, mother?" asked Thomas still smiling. Mona and Katt were busy in the garden looking at Kath's plants and hadn't heard.

Kathryn called Thomas over to sit with her and we talked, He was shocked. He actually flipped out and started calling me all kinds of names. He accused Kathryn of finally going senile. Finally Kathryn calmed him down and told him that maybe he should go home and come back when he was calmer.

He gathered his wife and daughter and did just that. Luckily his twin younger brothers and their families were more open. Both Carl and Cal simply shook my hand and started asking questions. Carl's wife Linda was very pregnant and I spent a good deal of the afternoon running back and forth fetching things for her. Cal's wife Debbie was really sweet and very open. She was the woman who'd spat out her food when she found out about Katt and I. She surprised me more than anyone else that day. "You're obviously very good for mom," she'd said. "I haven't seen her this happy in a long time. It's like someone pumped the breath of life back into her." She gave me a nice hug and earned herself a friend for life.

Kath of course embarrassed me greatly. "He pumped something into me," she laughed. Her kids were all shocked. The grandkids didn't get it, but we had a great time. Everything was going great except for the fact that her oldest and closest son simply didn't approve of us.

I was so in love with Kath by that time that I would have done anything to make her happy. I called Thomas and asked him to lunch.

"Mr. Smythe, what can I do to heal this rift between you and your mother?" I asked him before he even sat down.

"Ray, it's just so weird," he said. "I always thought of you as a nice young man. I kind of expected you to marry my daughter, and the next thing I know you're hooked up with a woman who's nearly three times your age. And to make things worse she's my mother. How the hell did this happen?"

"None of us knows when or where we'll find love," I said. "I thought that I was in love with your daughter. I followed her around like a puppy. I did any and every thing she asked of me," I said.

He smiled and said, "I remember. I remember her telling us that she was going to marry you."

"So when she asked me to take your mom to that concert. To tell you the truth, I didn't want to do it. But I loved her so much I agreed even though it meant that we wouldn't be together on our anniversary. We'd been dating for six months that night. It meant a lot to me but obviously not to her."

"How can you say that?" he asked. "She was all broken up about it when you guys stopped seeing each other. When I saw you at Mom's condo I thought that Mom was trying to get you two back together."

"Mr. Smythe, what you and I talk about goes no further. It has to stay a secret between us," I said. He nodded his head and I continued.

"When I first saw your mother, I no longer thought going to the concert with her was an onerous task. She's the most beautiful woman I've ever met. I was still in love or thought I was, with your daughter, but we had a great time and we got along really well.

She asked me to go for ice cream after the concert and we talked. It seemed like she really needed to go out and have some fun. So I invited her to go dancing. You know women and their shoes. She didn't have the right shoes for dancing so we stopped by Katt's apartment to borrow some.

We walked in on my girlfriend having sex with someone else on our anniversary. It literally broke my heart. That's what broke Katt and me up. Then your mom and I just became friends. Then it got deeper than that. We just fit. Anyone who spends any amount of time with us can see that. We really don't care whether people accept us or not.

You're her oldest son, so you not being around us, hurts her and that hurts me. That's why I wanted to talk to you today. I'm going to be with her for the rest of our lives so it would be nice if you could be a part of that. Who knows, maybe someday she'll dump me too, and you can be happy."

"More than likely, you'll dump her and leave her heart broken," he said.

"If that happens wouldn't you want to be there to pick up the pieces and say "I told you so," I asked.

"I'll think about it," he said. "I'm not promising you anything."

It took another month or so but he started to come around. Katt and Mona never really did. They always hated me.

When school started up again, Katt came to me outside of one of my classes and asked me if since the summer was over, I had ended my silly summer fling. I just laughed at her and told her that I had ended my silly fling, with her, months ago. I was seriously in love.

"What about me, I love you Ray," she said. "I have everything she has and mine are younger."

"Yeah but hers are better," I said. "Plus I can trust her."

"You just have some kind of GILF fixation, right now," she said. "Sooner or later you'll come back to your senses and realize that you don't want the senior version of me."

"Katt, actually you're the skanky version of her," I said. "I want the original. Often Imitated Never Duplicated GILF."

"Fuck you Ray," she snapped.

"Never again," I replied.

We had Thanksgiving dinner at Thomas' house and Mona went out of her way to embarrass me and make me feel uncomfortable. She did silly little things like setting a beautiful table complete with place cards for everyone there including the boyfriends or girlfriends of her nieces and nephews. Of course there was no room at the table for me and no place card either.

She did make an effort later and set up a little table off to one side near where their dog's food bowl sat, just for me.

Kathryn in her usual style handled it just fine. She sat me down in her place at the head of the table and then sat on my lap. We fed each other during the whole meal.

You could hear Mona griping the whole time about how undignified it was.

Kathryn laughed every time Mona said anything.

Finally Debbie asked, "Mom what's so funny?"

Kathryn told her that Mona had purposefully tried to humiliate me and thought it was funny, but she'd only served to make herself look stupid and to become poorer.

Mona choked on what she was eating then.

"Mona, how much money do you think I'm going to leave you personally?" asked Kath. "Get a figure in mind. Every time you do anything to hurt, embarrass or humiliate the man I love, subtract a hundred thousand dollars from that number."

Mona's eyes got huge and she left the table. From that point on she was always very polite to me. She still glared daggers at me every chance she got, but she was very fucking polite.

Holidays, vacations and special events were all times when the family got together. With the exception of Mona and Katt, I actually believed that they had all come to accept me.

Katt never stopped trying. The next summer when we'd been apart for nearly a year, she was still trying. We were having a pool party to celebrate my upcoming graduation, and my being hired by Nathan Johnson Associates as an architect.

Katt came out of the gazebo in a bikini and came over to me. "What do you think of this?" she asked. "I'll bet you miss having this in your bed."

"Wow I said," Your grandma looks way better in a bikini than you do. Her breasts are larger and feel better than I remember yours feeling. Her ass is much nicer too. And you're getting a little soft around the gut. Maybe one of the guys you're fucking has knocked you up."

She just looked shocked.

"To answer your second question... I have to admit you're right. I do miss having you in my bed. But only because when we were together I got some rest. You always just laid there like a block of wood with two balloons attached to it. Your Grandma wears me out. But on second thought, with her I know she's doing it because she loves me and I love her. There's also the fact that I can trust her. She'd never do to me what you did."

She was really glaring at me now. "Someday Ray, you're going to wish you were still with me. Grandma won't last forever."

"None of us will," I snapped. "That's why I'll cherish every day I have with her for as long as we have. And who knows with all of the STD's out there maybe you'll catch something at one of your gangbangs and die before we do."

"What do you mean we do, Ray," she sneered. "Maybe you've had your face stuck in my granny's pussy for too long. You aren't the same age as Grandma, you're just fucking her. You're my age dumb ass."

"Maybe this is the first time I've ever really been in love," I said quietly. "But I don't know if I'd even want to live anymore if anything happened to her."

"You are fucking pathetic," she said. "Get away from me." I turned around and came face to face with Kathryn and Debbie who'd heard most of it.

"She's one spoiled little bitch," said Debbie.

Kathryn didn't say a word. She just grabbed my arm and dragged me through the house. "Kathryn, I'm sorry," I said nervously. "I know she's your special granddaughter and I shouldn't have spoken to her like that but she pissed me off."

"Shut up, Ray," she said. She grabbed her keys off of the kitchen counter and we got into her Jag. We drove about four miles from our condo.

"This should be far enough," she said. I looked around and we were in front of a really sleazy motel. "Okay get a room."

I looked at her strangely. "Look if you want to throw me out that's fine, but I want to get some of my stuff and I'm staying in a better place than this. I have a good job. I can do a lot better than this."

She tilted her head back and started laughing like there was no tomorrow.

"Ray, why do you think we're here?" she laughed.

"Well I lost my temper with Katt, and you're angry with me," I said.

"No, I saw Katt try to tease you and heard everything you told her. The things you said to her got me so hot that I'm going to fuck your brains out and I didn't want the kids to hear me screaming, so we had to leave. Now get us a room."

We got back to the party a couple of hours later. Luckily we were in time for dinner. Apparently Debbie had told everyone about the incident.

Even Thomas was looking at me favorably. A few months later he and I had another one of our lunches. "I hate to tell you this," I said. "But you're going to be shocked again."

"Please don't tell me you're leaving her," he said. "I really didn't want to be right this time."

"Nope, it's worse than that," I said. "Thomas, I'm out of school and I have a great job." He grimaced a bit at that. I guess it irked him that Katt hadn't earned enough credits yet to graduate and might end up as a sixth year senior.

"Anyway, I love Kath and I want to be with her forever, but what we're doing just isn't enough for me," I said.

"Well you're a young man. You can't expect her to keep up with you. What do you want me to do, help you find a mistress?" he asked. His face showed shock and anger and he stood up.

"Thomas, sit down," I laughed. He sat down still looking at me funny.

"I called you here because the last time we had one of these talks it was AFTER Kath and I moved in together. This time I wanted you to know first."

He stared at me.

"Thomas, I want Kathryn to marry me. This isn't about legality; it's about so much more. As you already know, I've been with the firm for about a year now and I've moved up quickly. I've gotten several raises and I know your mom is rich but we're not living on her money. I support us now. That's great because there will be more money for you and your kids when the day finally comes that she's no longer with us. But I want her legally as mine."

"You do know the story about your biological father and how she never married him and that caused a scandal in those days. Well I want her to experience being someone's wife, basically mine. Look."

I handed him a set of papers that I'd had drawn up that was basically a pre-nup. It stated that we would both in the event of a divorce leave with what we'd brought into the marriage. I would have no claim on any of her assets, period.

"Does mom know about this?" he asked.

"Nope, I wanted to warn you first," I said.

"You know she's never going to sign this," he said. "We all know that you didn't go after her for her money Ray. What do you need from me?"