Home 06: Scenes From A Broken Home

"I need to go pick them up," Tara muttered, dropping her eyes from Rae's intense gaze.

"I want you to know that I understand why you made the choice you did. I know your children have to come first."

"Does it change anything?"

"I understand, but it wasn't fair to us or the children for us to have a part time relationship. I think . . ."

"Hush, Rae, and stop thinking. What do you feel?"

Rae suddenly gripped Tara's upper arms in her hands. "What do I feel? I feel like my heart has been torn apart, but we can't make choices based on feeling. That's what we did for the last year, and all we did was hurt each other and that little boy. We have got to be adults and make choices with our heads and not just our heart. Your head tells you to stay here for the good of your children, and I respect that, I accept it. My head tells me that we can't live apart and be together."

"So, that's that?" Tara snapped. "You can just throw away what we feel for one another?"

"Don't talk about it like it is an easy choice. I wanted a life with you and your children," Rae declared passionately. "But, we have to make the choice that is best for the children. You have decided that staying here is best for them, and I accept that. Don't play it off like it isn't difficult for both of us."

"Listen to yourself, Rae. It was difficult for me, too. I want to be with you and Will adores you, but Will and Rachel don't exist in a vacuum. They are products of Billy, and I can't ignore Billy's family."

Rae reached out and gently caught Tara's tear on her thumb. "I know, honey. I know."

"Can I still . . . can I still call you sometimes? Can we still be friends?"

Rae wet her lips and then lowered her head. She pressed her mouth against Tara's, who expectantly opened her lips in anticipation of the kiss. Rae pressed her lips firmly against Tara's mouth and then slid her tongue along her lover's full lips. The kiss was tender and passionate at the same time. It spoke of longing and love and left them both breathless when Rae finally pulled away. "No," she whispered. "No, I don't think we can be friends."

"Let me go," Tara answered, her voice broken, "Please, just let me go."

Rae dropped her hand from Tara's cheek and stepped away from the door of the car. Tara opened the door and slammed it behind her. She shoved her keys into the ignition and cranked the vehicle. She placed her trembling hands on the steering wheel but did not drive away. She leaned forward, her forehead resting on hands, and sobbed. Rae stood beside the car for a long moment, watching the woman she loved deal with her broken heart. After an eternity for both of them, she walked away.

New Year's Eve . . .

Raegan Hall had only missed Beth Randall's New Year's Eve party once in eight years, and that had been last year. Last year, Tara had shown up at her door, declaring unending love for her old friend. They had spent last New Year's Eve in each other's arms. They had made love multiple times and danced naked while they watched the Dick Clark special. When the ball had dropped in Times Square, Rae had kissed Tara and they had whispered pledges of love before falling into bed again.

A year later, Rae stood on the deck outside Beth's large Brentwood home. She had a glass of wine in her hand and had already been drinking quite a bit. Her equilibrium was moving beyond buzz into drunk territory and the promise of a headache was knocking behind her eyes. The winter air was cold, but Rae ignored it. She breathed in the cold, allowing it to sting her lungs and burn her eyes.

Behind her, the door opened and music poured outside briefly before the click of the closing door softened it. Rae sipped her wine as she listened to heels tap across the wooden decking. "What are you doing out here? It's freezing!" a voice laughed. The words were slurred, indicating that the speaker had also enjoyed Beth's open bar. Rae stared across the landscape as Erin McAllister leaned against the railing beside her.

Rae took another drink before answering. "I just needed to clear my head. Too much noise, too many people. I needed some space."

"I've heard that before," McAllister mumbled, her voice suddenly clear. Rae turned to look at the young rising country music star. McAllister wore a black dress that accentuated every curve of her body. The dress was strapless and her bare arms and shoulders were marked with goose bumps from the cold night air. The skirt stopped just above mid-thigh and Rae tried not to notice McAllister's shapely legs. The sexual tension between them had been instantaneous and Rae had spent the past year trying to resist it. They had almost given in during McAllister's county fair tour in the fall, but Rae had stopped it. McAllister had been furious and they hadn't spoken much since Rae had left the singer alone in Jackson to flee to Tara.

Only things with Tara had not gone according to plan. Tara had decided not to come to Nashville and Rae had decided to end the relationship. Rae had to struggle for a moment to come up with a reason not to pursue the chemistry she felt with McAllister. She knew it wasn't good for McAllister's career. She knew it was unprofessional. McAllister was the hot new talent that was going to make Capitol Records lots of money. The company could easily replace Rae. Besides, she still had feelings for Tara. It wouldn't be fair to anyone if she started a new relationship until she stopped loving Tara Myers. She took another sip of her wine and resumed staring at the outside world. "What are you doing out here?"

"Looking for you," McAllister stated.

Rae turned suddenly, her eyes narrow and sharp. "You've found me."

Erin lifted her hand to Rae's shoulder, her fingertips gliding over her sleeve. "Beth told me that you broke up with your girlfriend."

"Yeah, I'm sure Beth couldn't wait to share that news," Rae grumbled.

"It was the right thing for you to do," McAllister stated calmly. "You wanted me way too much to be tied down to someone else."

Rae was just drunk enough that she did not flinch at Erin's words. "You're awfully full of yourself."

Erin's fingers danced over Rae's cheek. She leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the executive's lips. Rae was impassive at first, but eventually started returning the kiss, their lips moving against each other in rising hunger. Erin finally pulled back, her fingers still cupping Rae's cheek. "Are you denying it?"

"Nothing has changed since Jackson. Being gay is still not good for your career."

"One thing has changed," Erin whispered, stretching toward Rae for another kiss, this one more intimate than the last as the singer's tongue danced along Rae's lips. "You are no longer involved with someone else."

"I still have very deep feelings for someone else," Rae replied in a husky voice.

"Maybe I can help you forget those feelings," Erin insisted, her lips moving against Rae's neck. Rae tilted her head and sighed softly. "Your body wants me to help, doesn't it?"

"My body has seldom been the best judge when it comes to decision-making," Rae laughed, cupping Erin's arms with her hands. Her palms glided over Erin's cool flesh as she wrestled with her rising desire and moral convictions. "This isn't a good choice for you."

"So you keep telling me, but pretending I'm not gay for the paparazzi doesn't make me any less gay, and there are no cameras here."

"You make a very good argument."

"Of course I do." Erin trailed her fingers over Rae's flesh until she reached the woman's hand. "Come on, you owe me a dance." She took hold of Rae's hand and tugged gently toward the house. Rae picked up her wine glass from the railing and drained it before following the talented, beautiful singer into the house.

Erin weaved among the dancers in Beth's house. Rae did not look at the faces of the people she had known for a long time. She kept her eyes riveted on Erin's firm butt and long legs and their joined hands. Erin stopped in the center of the room and spun herself into Rae's arms. She glided her hands over Rae's shoulders and pressed her body into the other woman's. Rae's hands went to Erin's waist as the singer's arms slid behind her neck. Rae could feel Erin's breasts pressing against her body. She moved her hands to the small of McAllister's back, their hips sliding against each other casually, and then dipped her hands to McAllister's bottom. She could smell the sweetness of Erin's perfume and the scent was intoxicating. She pressed her face into Erin's neck and inhaled deeply.

Erin tilted her head back, exposing the flesh of her neck, her fingers combing into Rae's short brown hair. Rae pressed her lips to Erin's slender throat, her lips finding the singer's steady pulse. Rae's heartbeat was starting to accelerate as she wrestled with the reasons why she shouldn't pursue the passion she felt for Erin McAllister. All her arguments were quickly loosing weight. Erin was a beautiful woman who had made it perfectly clear where her desires lie. It made Rae feel good and sexy to be wanted by a woman who could have anyone she wanted. The paparazzi weren't aware of McAllister yet, so they wouldn't bother to take a picture even if they saw them together. If they did see them together, McAllister was a talent of Capital Records, so they could dismiss their relationship as purely professional. Things with Tara were over. Rae had cut her lover loose twice. Perhaps surrendering to her lust for Erin McAllister would help her to start letting go of Tara. The list of reasons to press forward were tilting the balance in favor of following her body's lead in pursuit of McAllister.

Erin's fingers were in her hair, playing with the short strands at the back of her neck. Rae's fingers began bunching the material of Erin's skirt, the satin sliding slowly up elegant legs. Rae moved her mouth to Erin's shoulder, making tiny kisses on the exposed flesh. Erin sighed softly, the sound offering encouragement as her hands moved to Rae's shoulder, gliding down the executive's arm. They continued swaying to the music, their movements slow and deliberate, each touch a promise of the passion to come.

"Take me home," Erin whispered breathlessly in Rae's ear.

"Okay," Rae answered after licking her lips nervously. "Okay." She threaded her fingers between Erin's and led the young woman from the room. As she helped Erin slip on her coat, her eyes met Beth's across the room. Beth had never been a fan of Tara. She had predicted from the beginning that Rae's former classmate would never move to Nashville. She had pushed Rae toward McAllister from the moment they first heard the girl sing and had picked up on the fact that the sinewy woman was gay. It surprised Rae to see that Beth was not smiling in triumphant or encouragement as she watched her best friend prepare to leave with Erin. Beth met Rae's stare and Rae quickly looked away, her hand at the small of Erin's back as they left the party.

McAllister leaned across the console as Rae steered her vehicle through downtown Nashville, whispering directions to her apartment. Rae followed the woman's instructions, trying to keep her focus on the road and not on the lust coursing through her body or on Erin's hand roaming along her thigh. Suddenly, it seemed forever since she had been touched. Four months of loneliness was about to overwhelm her as she steered into the garage of Erin's apartment building.

As soon as the door to the elevator slid closed, Erin turned to face Rae. She wrapped her arms around the other woman's shoulders. Rae stepped backward till she hit the wall of the elevator. Rae slipped her hands to Erin's butt and pulled the woman against her body. McAllister lifted her face expectantly and Rae hungrily kissed her.

The kiss was laced with raw passion. They stumbled out of the elevator and down the hallway to Erin's apartment. As Erin worked on the lock, Rae's hands moved over her hips, trailing lightly up her sides and teasing the swell of her breast. Erin pushed back, rubbing her bottom asked Rae's hips. Rae growled low.

Erin finally got the door open and grabbed Rae's hand, pulling her handler into the room. The door slammed behind them as Rae fell against it, pulling Erin tight to her body, their mouths locked in a fiery, passionate kiss. Erin's lips tugged at Rae's. Rae's tongue explored the depths of the singer's mouth. Erin's fingers, callused from playing guitar, worked on the buttons of Rae's blouse. Rae pushed Erin's coat off her shoulders. It dropped to the floor and Rae began pushing Erin backwards, walking toward the couch in the living room. She shrugged out of her shirt as she went, and then wrapped her hands around Erin, lowering the zipper of the short dress. It sagged as Erin's legs hit the couch and they both fell backwards.

Rae's lips moved down the singer's long neck, pausing to count Erin's thundering pulse with her tongue. Erin's fingers tangled in Rae's short hair as the older woman continued her journey, her lips making their way along the gentle swell of the singer's ample cleavage. Erin's fingernails scratched Rae's back, leaving light red marks as she worked free her partner's bra. Rae pulled up just enough to let the undergarment fall away. She pushed Erin's dress down, revealing two perfectly formed pale globes. Rae cupped one firm breast in her hand, her thumb flicking over the nipple. Her mouth went to the other, her tongue circling the pink areola. She twirled her tongue around the stiffening nipple. Erin moaned softly, hugging Rae's head to her breast.

Erin sank her fingernails into Rae's shoulder as her lover switched to the other breast, her mouth in constant motion. The singer's hips bucked upward, every nerve in her body tied to Rae's tongue and lips. Rae dropped her free hand to Erin's leg, gliding upward as her tongue continued to tease the girl's sensitive nipples. Her hand caressed the inside of Erin's thigh, pushing the velvety material of the skirt upward. Her hand cupped Erin's mound as her mouth covered the singer's. Erin met the kiss, her tongue finding Rae's. Rae tasted Erin's mouth, her tongue gliding behind the girl's teeth. Their tongues twirled around each other. Rae traced Erin's lips, her palm rubbing against Erin's slick pussy.

Erin was panting, her hips rising and falling in time with Rae's constant motion. Rae pushed her middle finger between Erin's slick lips, finding the swollen button buried within. As her palm continued caressing, her finger rubbed back and forth against her clit. Erin's body quickened the pace, rising up to meet each of Rae's strokes.

Rae bowed her head to lick Erin's nipples as she pushed two fingers into Erin's deep canal. She rubbed her thumb against Erin's clit as her fingers thrust in and out. Erin arched her body, offering herself to Rae's ministrations. She moved in time with Rae's strokes, her head tossing side to side as Rae moved faster. She threw her head back, her veins bulging as she struggled to breath. Rae pounded faster, months of frustration and loneliness pouring into every movement of her body. She leaned close to Erin's ear, whispering encouragement as her hands moved quicker.

The singer yelped and cried out as Rae pushed her over the edge. Her body tightened, her muscles clutching at Rae's fingers, and then spasmed violently. Rae continued to stroke, pushing Erin higher. Erin exploded again, her perfect voice echoing off the walls of the apartment. She collapsed and Rae pulled out, laying her cheek on Erin's heaving breast.

They lay in silence for a while, both breathing hard. Erin twirled Rae's hair while Rae continued to tease Erin's nipple. Sometime, they both drifted off to sleep and when Rae woke, Erin had slipped away. She sat up on the couch, rubbing her face. There was a slight throbbing in her temple that would probably be a full-fledged hangover in the morning. She heard rustling behind her and turned to see Erin moving in the small kitchen. The singer was nude and Rae took a moment to enjoy the young woman's profile. Her breasts were pert, her waist slender, and her butt firm. She was a beautiful, desirable woman who was comfortable with her sexuality and sensuality.

Feeling Rae's eyes on her, Erin glanced over her shoulder and smiled her dazzling smile. It reminded Rae again that this woman would soon be a star. She had a charismatic personality that seduced every member of the audience. Rae had seen her work her magic on the county fair tour last fall. She walked toward Rae and to the executive, everything seemed to move in slow motion. She handed Rae a glass of wine. "A little hair of the dog to take the edge off?" she asked with a playful smile. Rae took the glass and sipped it, allowing the alcohol to work its trick as her eyes followed Erin around the couch.

Erin placed her hands on the back of the couch, her arms framing Rae's head as she leaned forward, her lips parted slightly. Rae stretched up in anticipation, moistening her lips for a kiss. Just before their mouths touched, Erin turned her head. She nibbled on Rae's neck, her lips dancing along Rae's jaw line before moving toward her lips again. Rae attempted to capture the girl's mouth, but Erin again teasingly eluded her. This time, Erin moved her mouth to Rae's ear, nibbling and blowing lightly. The game of cat and mouse continued, Rae a willing prisoner as Erin teased her with lips and tongue and breasts, never quite making full contact with her new lover.

The singer kissed her way to Rae's breast, nipping and sucking and licking as she journeyed over the peaks. Her tongue circled each nipple before closing her lips to suckle gently. Rae sighed, leaning against the back of the couch and closing her eyes as Erin switched her attention to the other breast. She teased each nipple to stiff attention before pulling away, finally giving her mouth to her partner. Their tongues twirled and entwined, their lips moving against each other. Without breaking the kiss, Erin took the wine from Rae's hand, setting it aside. She took Rae's hands and tugged her off the couch.

Raegan followed the goddess through the small apartment to her bedroom. Erin turned to face her, their lips meeting again as her hand went to Rae's waistband. Her fingers deftly opened the fly and her palms glided over Rae's hips, pushing the black jeans over her partner's thighs. They pooled at Rae's feet and she stepped out of them, grabbing Erin's waist and pulling the woman against her. Erin rocked her hips, contacting and pulling away from Rae several times. Rae's legs hit the side of the bed and she sat down, still holding Erin close. Erin broke the kiss, rewarding Rae with a playful, teasing smile as she knelt in front of her lover. She licked Rae's nipples, sucking on each full breast, before kissing her way down Rae's stomach. Rae leaned back on the bed, propped on her elbows so she could watch Erin's descent. She lifted her hips so that Erin could remove her underwear and then closed her eyes as the first ripple of intense pleasure washed through her body.

It had been August since anyone had touched Raegan so intimately. Her body was hungry for the caress. She held her breath as the tip of Erin's tongue danced over her sensitive lips. Erin slipped her arms beneath Rae's thighs, lifting the woman's hips and opening her legs wider. Her tongue glided over Rae's lips, tasting the salty slickness before dipping inside. Raegan gasped, all the air leaving her lungs as Erin's tongue swirled playfully. She shifted her hips, trying to guide her throbbing clit to Erin's mouth. Erin easily avoided the sensitive button, remaining in complete control as she rubbed the inside of Rae's swollen lips. Panting, Rae leaned back, closing her eyes as her body trembled with yearning. She opened her eyes and tried to sit back up, placing her hand on the back of Erin's head. Her fingers tangled in long auburn hair and she fell back again as the singer finally relented and flicked the tip of her tongue against Rae's clit. Rae moaned in encouragement and Erin moved her tongue quicker. Her breasts were rising and falling as she struggled to catch her breath. She knotted her fingers in Erin's hair and pulled slightly. Erin expertly teased her, giving attention, reading Rae's body, and pulling away before Rae built too high. When Rae thought she could tolerate the waves no longer, when she was ready to beg Erin to stop the teasing and give her release, Erin closed her lips around her clit and began sucking it, her tongue drumming softly. Rae cried out as her body toppled over the precipice. As she flew off the cliff, she felt herself soaring. She floated through the air, racing toward the sky as Erin refused to relent. Just as she started plummeting toward the bottom, Erin shifted her attention and her body took flight again.