Secret Desires

It had been nearly two years since my wife had unexpectedly passed away. It had been a very rough two years, not only on myself, but on my stepdaughter Melinda. Ironically, Kathy and I had met several years ago at one of those support groups for recent widows and widowers. Kathy's husband, Melinda's father had been killed the very same night that Melinda was born, rushing her to the hospital. It was a miracle that Kathy had survived, let alone the baby, with the additional news she would never again ever be able to bare children.

My first wife had also died just a short time prior to that, a long drawn out illness with cancer that had left me emotionally drained, confused and somewhat vulnerable. We met, became friends and soon after become what was then called as "Coffee buddies" meeting twice a week after our meetings were over. In time, we became more than that. And for Melinda, I was the only one she ever knew or called daddy. To her, I was, even though she had been told long ago that I wasn't really her father. For all intense and purposes, as far as she was concerned anyway, I really was.

Melinda was a feisty little go-getter, just like her mother had been. Popular in school, almost to a fault, she'd been a cheerleader, active in gymnastics and had even considered briefly trying out for the Olympics at one point, she was really that good. Time and circumstance dictated otherwise however, though she had gotten a scholarship that allowed her to attend school out of state where she'd always dreamed of going.

Melinda was built for gymnastics. Not skinny, not by any means, just lithe, a bit of a more voluptuous build perhaps than a lot of gymnasts were expected to have, especially with much larger breasts than most I'd seen. Though lately as we'd both noticed, many of the girls we'd seen on TV seemed to be gravitating in that direction. Though her almost black hair was long, she always wore it in a ponytail most of the time. It was a rare thing to ever see her wearing it any other way. Melinda also had her mother's eyes, dark brown almost smoldering when you looked at them. Hell...she virtually had her mother's face, so often reminding me of her every time I had seen her, which lately hadn't been all that often while she'd been away at school. Every time I did see her when she came home for one of her quick brief visits, it seemed she had changed. Slowly over time, coming to look more and more like her mother, though I think I partially projected that in her myself as I still missed my wife. But the fact I didn't see Melinda as much anymore either contributed to that.

Melinda had in fact been after me to start dating again, though the truth of the matter was, I simply wasn't ready for that. It hadn't even been two years yet, and I'd made a mental promise to myself that I wouldn't even consider such a thing until it had at least been that long. I'd already been through this twice now, I had no desire to have to go through it again.

Up until recently, I'd managed to hold on though it hadn't been easy, but then came the layoffs. Almost overnight the word came down they'd be closing the facility I worked in, soon to be unemployed.

Fortunately, I hadn't been frivolous with the insurance money we'd received after Kathy's death. Most of that had gone into savings, which I'd hoped I could grow towards retirement, and a portion of which I'd intended to save for Melinda to have as small stipend after she'd graduated from College. I'd also managed to invest a bit in a 401K, though the thought of having to draw from any of that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. With unemployment, and a slow draw from savings, as long as I tightened my belt up a little, I knew I could get by for as long as a year if I had to. The only problem with that was, I couldn't afford to support Melinda's going to school out of state the way I had been. Even with a scholarship, I'd been helping her with her expenses, which had included taking care of the rent on the apartment she shared with another girl, someone who'd in a very short period of time had become her dearest and best of friends.

I hadn't as yet told Melinda about the worrisome finances, though she of course knew about my recent unemployment. She'd called to let me know she was coming down for the weekend to visit, and in fact had asked if it was all right if Charlene came with her. I'd met Charlene only once before when I'd gone there for a visit to check out their new place, but I hadn't seen her since then, so it had been almost a year since I had.

I'd decided to wait and break the news to her in person. And it wasn't something I was looking forward to either. The plain and simple truth was, I could no longer afford to pay her rent and expenses, that and keep from depleting her savings and mine in the process.

Melinda and Charlene had made pretty good time, making short order of the five-hour drive, arriving late the following Friday afternoon. Though delighted to see my stepdaughter again, I wasn't too keen on her neither appearance, nor Charlene's for that matter when they stepped out of the VW Bug they were driving. Although she had every right to be a woman, and a young good-looking woman at that, I had noticed a slow gradual change in my stepdaughter's demeanor over time and couldn't help but wonder if Charlene hadn't had some influence over that.

I had welcomed her "excited to see me kiss" along with the hug... but I'd given her one of my patented "Don't care for what your wearing looks" even as I did that. Both she as well as Charlene stepped out of the car, each of them wearing what appeared to be a cut off football jersey from the University they were attending. Though I understood the purpose behind exposing their midriffs perhaps, to go along with their almost too short shorts, I wasn't too happy in realizing that one tiny little movement in the wrong direction would reveal the bottom half of her braless breasts. Which was another unexpected revelation, as I don't think I recalled ever seeing Melinda going braless like this before either. But like I said, so was Charlene.

And talk about a quandary of mixed emotions because of that. On the one hand, Melinda was my daughter, at least that's the way I thought of her even if she wasn't, so I quite naturally averted my eyes as I reached over to help them with their luggage as Melinda attempted to dig out their usual over packing, over loaded vehicle. The firm roundness of her breasts suddenly revealed as I stood there. Not so with Charlene however. In a weird way perhaps, my morals had somehow distinguished between the two, and though I would of course never act on any aroused thoughts, looking at Charlene was somehow permissible.

Charlene likewise wore her hair in a ponytail too, though she was blonde. She was a bit taller than my daughter as well, nearly as tall as I was at just under six feet. She also had a slightly larger chest, which made it even more difficult for me not to notice as she opened the hood of the car and began passing back to me a few additional somewhat smaller suitcases. Charlene's bare breasts hung down in front of my eyes like ice-sickles hanging off the porch during the winter.

"You brought a hell of a lot of stuff with you for only three days!" I told her when I eyeballed what appeared to be several boxes crammed into the back seat of the VW.

Melinda smiled at me, "That's because I'm moving back daddy," she said simply. "My plan is to re-enroll here locally in a couple of months, though living at home again while I do," she added. I know by the shocked look on my face that I had more than one or two questions to ask her about that, but she headed me off. "Help us finish unloading, then we'll sit down over a beer and discuss it," she informed me.

Another surprise. "Since when did you start drinking beer?" I asked myself. Though under the circumstances, it seemed like a rather silly thing to get all worked up over. She was after all old enough to drink, beer at least anyway along with a bit of wine on occasion.

Once we had in fact hauled up everything into her old room which remained exactly the way she had left it, we headed back downstairs to the kitchen, opening those beers they'd requested and began to chat.

"So you ready to tell me what it is that's going on here?" I asked.

"Reality," she answered simply. "I'm not so naive to think that you're going to be able to continue on in supporting me away at school, at least for the time being anyway," she answered. "And even working a part-time job isn't the answer either. I've been studying hard, maintaining my near perfect grade level, but I also know, the moment I start having to work a part-time job in order to try and make ends meet, my grades will no doubt slip a little, I'll be too damn tired to study. So...the obvious solution is to move back home for a while, at least until things change again. At least living here, you don't have to worry about the rent, and obviously my expenses will diminish greatly as well."

I was shocked, but proud and relieved to hear her telling me this. She'd basically beaten me to the punch as it were. But...as I damn well should have known, I still wasn't aware that there was another shoe that was going to fall here, so I didn't really see it coming when it did.

"Just one thing, one small little favor I'd like to ask daddy," she said smiling at me the way her mother once used to do whenever she wanted something in particular. I guess I should have seen it coming, but didn't until it was too late, especially after I answered her beforehand.

"Just name it baby, whatever you want."

Melinda turned grinning broadly towards her girlfriend. "See? I told you he would understand!" Melinda beamed.

"Understand what?" I thought without saying it, now smiling stupidly in return as I sat there waiting for the rest of it.

"Obviously with me moving back, that put Charlene in a difficult spot as well as she could no longer afford to live there either. And she didn't want to have to worry about looking for another roommate, especially as we're best friends, and she doesn't want to have to live with anyone else besides me. When I told her I really did have to move back home, at least until things change again, I assured her that you'd be ok with her moving back with me, living here at home with us!"

Once again I tried to sit there and smile like everything was perfectly ok, and must have managed it at least to some degree, though I was pretty much in a state of shock even then.

"My room is plenty big for the two of us," she now added. "And we certainly don't mind sharing the same bed, we do that now anyway," she informed me, once again reminding me of the close quarters they had been sharing together back in their apartment. "All we really need is another dresser, for her stuff. So, what do you say daddy? Is it ok if Charlene moves in with us for a while, at least until we all can get back on our feet again?"

"Sure baby...why not?"

I mean...what else could I say?

**

Almost immediately I was to discover that the three of us now living in this moderately sized home together would create a few unanticipated problems. When Kathy and I had first purchased the place, it came with an unfinished basement. Something I had planned to eventually complete. At the moment however, it remained unfinished. All that was downstairs was the laundry room and plumbing for a second bathroom, which I'd not gotten around to yet either. Needless to say, that meant the three of us would be sharing the one and only bathroom.

Although the place had three bedrooms, the one at the end of the upstairs hall I'd turned into a study, though it was more like a storage and junk room as I'd really let the place go. Enthusiastically however, the girls agreed to help me fix the place up again, and give them a quiet decent place to study in. Sharing the one bedroom together, which connected to the bathroom we both shared, me on the other side of that would prove interesting, not to mention take some getting used to as I was soon to discover.

With a long day ahead of us as we all settled in, the girls had decided to retire early, just as I decided to do as well. Having lived alone for so long now, I'd gotten into some personal habits that I would soon need to make some adjustments for. The first of which was walking out of the bathroom into my room to undress, leaving the connecting door open, which I did.

I had sat down on the end of my bed, taking off my shoes and then my pants along with my underwear. As I very often did, sleeping in the nude, I then lay back on the bed just relaxing there for a moment, thinking about the day's events. With my feet still dangling over the end of the bed lost in thought, I didn't at first hear the door to my daughters room open, nor did I hear or realize what was going on before it was too late. Charlene had of course entered the bathroom. Bad enough that I was half sitting, laying there on the end of my bed naked. Thank god that I didn't have an erection! When I heard the all too familiar sound of someone 'tinkling' I sat up. Not that I was offended by that, not at all. Just surprised by it, especially since I hadn't heard that particular sound for years now. In my somewhat tired confusion, I almost expected to see my wife sitting there instead of Charlene, had it been Melinda, I might have believed it was actually her for a moment. But at least seeing Charlene sitting there brought me back to reality. The problem was, I was now standing, looking at her naked as she sat there on the toilet peeing, looking at me. And smiling.

At first I didn't know what to think, a thousand thoughts racing through my mind all at once. I found it shocking that she hadn't closed the door. But then I wondered if upon seeing me laying there on the bed the way I was, that in her doing so, she might have worried about embarrassing me and decided not to do so. Had I continued to lay there the way I had been without sitting up, I wouldn't have seen her, only heard her. Now here I was standing in front of her, entirely naked watching her pee, though again...she was smiling.

"You need to use the bathroom?" she actually asked. "I'll be done in a minute," she then added grabbing a wad of tissue, which I then watched her use as she slipped it down between her legs wiping herself. I was again dumbfounded with her unworried, unconcerned activity. Especially when she stood up, only then reaching down to pull her very tiny black thong up covering herself. It was perhaps only a second or two that I had seen her, at best. But for the duration of time she had given me, I had actually looked upon her totally bare pussy. I mean not like there was a lot to see at that angle or anything like that, just enough to know it was bare...and that I had seen it as she now turned showing me the near perfect backside of her ass as she walked over to the sink and began washing her hands. "Go ahead if you need to," she now added as she stood there. "And don't be shy...I'm used to it, and no sense flushing it yet either, why waste the water?"

For some reason, that comment seemed to shake me out of my trance, making me realize I was standing there naked when she said that. Almost at once I first drew my hands over, covering myself, which she giggled at. I now watched as she reached down pulling that skimpy football jersey up and over her head as she walked towards the open door on her side. And though all I saw was her bare back, across the room as she entered it, I now saw my own stepdaughter. She too was entirely naked, waiting to come in. They passed one another in the bedroom sharing a smile, and then Melinda looked up seeing me still standing there, though thank god I had my hands over my private parts. Unfortunately, she didn't. But what she did do, which Charlene hadn't done, was walk over pulling my door closed. Though like Charlene, she too smiled at me without a hint of embarrassment.

I knew then, there'd have to be a few rule changes around the house, most of which I myself was going to have to observe and adhere to.

It didn't get any better the following morning either. If anything, it got worse.

**

I woke up to the smell of freshly brewed coffee, something I hadn't done for a few years now. Just smelling it was invigorating as I climbed out of bed, and eventually made my way downstairs. Maybe having the girls living with me wouldn't be so bad after all, especially if I was to wake up to already made coffee every morning. What I should have guessed at and realized, was that Melinda had never been a morning person, and probably would never be either. If she had the opportunity to sleep in, she did so for about as long as possible until she absolutely had to get up. Charlene on the other hand was one of those people that got by on six hours sleep, if that. And like me, had to start off her day with a nice steaming cup of the brew. As I followed my nose into the kitchen, I was soon to discover another issue I felt would eventually have to be addressed. Charlene, though sitting at the table had even more revealing clothing on than she had last night. At least she did the way I saw it. She had on what was obviously a man's sleeveless underwear shirt, which looked painted on. Especially as it highlighted her rather large breasts, both nipples of which could be clearly seen pressing against it as she sat there. Thank god she was at least sitting down at the moment, visions of her wearing that all too brief tiny thong would have been more than I could have handled.

"Morning!" she said bright and cheery, about to stand up in order to pour me a cup. Seeing that, I headed her off however.

"Don't bother, I'll get it!" I said perhaps a bit too loudly, almost wincing upon hearing myself, though Charlene merely resituated herself back into her seat, taking a sip of her coffee. I had to tear my eyes away from her chest as she did that, walking past her towards the kitchen counter. She had laid out two more empty cups, one of which I then turned over, filling it. As I did so, I looked down at myself and nearly panicked.

All I had on was my robe, and nothing else. Once again, my typical morning attire as I most often went outside, grabbed the paper while waiting for the coffee to finish. After which I would usually sit down at the table, or most often during the summer months, head outside to the patio and sit there reading it. If it got warm enough, I very often took off my bathrobe and did so naked. But not today.

Today, as I looked down, I saw my erection, or rather the end of it poking through the opening in my robe. I very often had a morning "pee-hard" as I called it, and had never really given it much thought until now. But this one was of course more than that. It most likely had been at least half of what it was now when I'd first come down the stairs without really thinking about it. The moment I had glanced at Charlene's breasts however, even for the second's time that I had, it had been enough to awaken it to full staff. There was no fucking way I was going to keep it hidden from her dressed the way I was. All I could think of to do was to fill my cup, and then walk back to the table sort of the long way around, and then slide into my chair, almost backing in to it when I did. It might look weird as I did that, but at least I'd hide the obvious from her in doing so. Finally retaking my seat, I did in fact receive a curious look from her as I sat down, but she never said anything.

"Been a long time since I've woken up to the smell of fresh coffee," I told her.

"Bet it's been a long time for a number of things," she quipped looking at me over the rim of her cup as she took another sip. All I could think of to do was smile back at her without saying anything. Which perhaps she took as approval to carry on with our discussion.