Silver Arrow Ch. 01-04

"Are you all better now?" Debbie asked.

"Almost. I'm going to be better in a month or so, I think."

"How long is a month?" Sandy asked.

I had to think of how to answer that. "When's your birthday?" I asked her.

"March. Number four. I'll show you on the calendar in the kitchen," she said, jumping down from the sofa.

I stood and followed her into the kitchen and she stood on her tiptoes to put a finger on the number four on the year calendar. There was a big red circle around the number. I pointed to today's date and showed her that by the time her birthday came around, I would be all better. I hoped that would be so.

She ran back into the living room and jumped onto the sofa, seating herself beside Debbie. The three of them were like little birds on a branch. They wanted hear more about my trials and tribulations.

I deliberately glossed over some of the more graphic things that happened to me and tried to keep the descriptions simple. They wanted to see the scars from my operations but I put that off for now by saying it wouldn't be proper for me to take my clothes off in the living room. Luckily, that satisfied them for the present.

"Children, your father is staying for supper," Diane announced. "Please go and get washed. It's almost time to come to the table."

"I really didn't want to impose on you, Diane," I said. "I just wanted to stop by and say hello and let you know everything's going to be all right soon. I'll be looking for a job shortly but there's no rush since I'm covered on L.T.D.I. for up to a year."

"You didn't really think you could just show up and then leave like that did you?" she admonished. "You saw how the children reacted to your being here. Debbie recognized you before I did."

"Well, I was out on the porch and it was dark and you weren't expecting me."

"That's true, but I'm very glad you came, Doug. The children are asking about you regularly ever since I let them know you had an accident and were in the hospital for a long time."

"I'm just glad they remember me."

"Don't be silly. Of course they remember you. It hasn't been that long."

"It seems like it to me. That stay in hospital seemed like an eternity."

"I'm sure it did, but you're out now. Are you going to stay in Minneapolis to look for a job?"

"I don't know. I haven't decided. This is a vacation trip for me. I wanted to see you and the children, but I'm just getting used to the idea of being back in action. Like I told you in my letter, I won't be going back to my old job at Traylor ... because of the physical problems I have, but I do need to find something useful to do. I'm not worried, Diane. I feel pretty good, all things considered. I can still make a pretty good life for myself."

"Of course you can. I can't get over how different you look. So slim and trim. I hope you can keep it that way, Doug. Don't let yourself go back to where you were."

"You can count on it. I won't. I have a couple of restrictions that will help me keep that promise."

At that point the three youngsters came bounding down the hallway and into the kitchen.

"Go sit at the table, now. Your supper is ready," Diane told them.

They moved immediately to the table and seated themselves. I notice an extra chair at the end of the table and realized it was for me. I thought maybe I'd tear up again at the sight. It was a scene from before the divorce. I was able to blink it away, but I think Diane noticed and distracted the children.

Chapter 3 Temporary Bliss

The meal was simple; spaghetti with tomato and meat sauce, a dinner roll, and a tossed salad. I'd had this a hundred or more times before, but it was familiar, good, home cooking. I would only eat about half of what was in front of me and I needed to apologize in advance to Diane.

"Don't be upset if I don't eat a lot, Diane. I've got to limit my portions and make sure I can digest everything. I tend to eat four or five times a day."

She looked somewhat shocked at my comment, but nodded her understanding.

"Is that because of your stomach," Debbie asked, as only a child can, straight to the point.

"That's right. I love spaghetti, but I have to just eat a little bit at a time."

"That's okay, Dad. You can save the rest and heat it up in the microwave later before you go to bed."

"You're pretty smart, young lady. That's exactly what I do most nights."

When the meal was finished, Diane put some clear wrap over my plate and put it in the refrigerator.

"We can heat it up whenever you want, Doug," she smiled.

"Uhhm ... I need to find a motel, Diane. I wasn't planning to stay here."

"Well, now you are. Go bring your things in and put them in the master bedroom. We'll deal with the sleeping arrangements when the children are in bed."

I looked at her carefully and didn't see a moment's hesitation. It was a "done deal" as far as she was concerned. I assumed I'd be sleeping on the sofa.

I pulled out my travel bag from the back of the Subaru and brought it into the house. As instructed, I put it inside the door of the master bedroom before returning to the kitchen. I assumed a well established pattern from our marriage; Diane washed and I dried. I needed her help to know where to put things, but it was a familiar and comfortable routine.

"Tell me about your job," I suggested as she began to make tea.

"I've been able to get a home business started and it's doing very well. I do billings for professional offices. Most are doctors and dentists, some are engineers or small design firms. I'm studying accounting at Brown Mackie College to gain accreditation and include those services as well. There are lots of businesses that can't afford full-time accounting and billing people, so I would be able to perform that function."

"Good for you. And it's becoming a good business?"

"Yes. It's ideal, Doug. I'm here for the children when they go to school and when they get home. I won't get rich, but with your help, we've got a nice home and the children aren't wanting for anything."

"I'm glad, Diane. I'm happy that you're happy," I said, meaning it.

"It hasn't been easy, but I can see that it's going to be okay."

"I'm sorry how all this turned out, Diane. I know you got fed up trying to get me to do something about my weight and my health. It took a near catastrophe to make it happen. I'm not sure it would have happened any other way."

"I'm just happy you survived it. The children are happy too, but when you leave, it will be difficult for them. Debbie understands, but I'm not sure Billy and Sandy will. They miss their father."

"Maybe I can find a job nearby. I have time to look and make sure it's something that I can enjoy and do well at. I want to be near the children too."

We spent the next hour or so with the youngsters telling me about their new lives in Louisville. They talked about their school (Sandy was in playschool) and their new friends. I liked what I heard. They were happy and enjoying their life. I hoped my leaving wouldn't be too traumatic for them. I promised, with fingers crossed, that I would see them more often. I hoped that I could keep that promise.

Sandy was first to bed, followed by Billie, and at eight-thirty, Debbie reluctantly agreed to go. All of them gave me a big hug and kiss after I assured them that I would be there in the morning before they left for school.

"You really miss them, don't you?" Diane said as we sat together on the sofa.

"Yes, I miss all of you," I answered, not daring to look at her and show my fresh tears.

I felt her hand on mine.

"You need to find a new life for yourself, Doug. This is your chance, just as our divorce was my chance. I don't mean that to sound like I needed the divorce for that reason. When we ... separated ... I was forced to find a way to look after the children and myself. I've been lucky and it's working out. I want you to be lucky too."

I nodded. "Thank you. I want that too. I wish ... I wish things were different, but they aren't. I'm going to do what I can to find something near enough that I can visit now and then. Stay in touch with you and the children. I promise you'll always have my support ... financial and emotional ... no matter what."

She leaned over and kissed my cheek.

"Thank you, Doug. You are a good man and I think you're going to be a better man soon."

"I don't mean to get personal, but is there another man in your life?" I asked tentatively.

"No. I haven't had the time. Maybe in a while. I'm not in a rush. Besides, with three children, it's kind of a major obstacle when it comes to eligible suitors."

"Not if they're smart," I said. "Those are three great kids and any guy would be lucky as hell to have them along with you."

"That's nice of you to say so, but I'm not out actively pursuing opportunities."

We talked some more about our lives and the children before it was time to finish my meal. Diane reheated it in the microwave and I poured a glass of milk to go with it. I was almost able to finish it and I knew it would hold me until morning. It was time for bed. I expected to be occupying the sofa, but I got a surprise.

"You'll be sleeping in my bed tonight," Diane announced, looking me straight in the eye.

"Why? I don't understand."

"Douglas Hansen, we slept together for ten years and one more night isn't going to make the slightest bit of difference. There won't be any hanky-panky if that's what you're wondering. You'll be more comfortable and sleep better in a familiar bed. You are still recovering from your accident and you need proper rest. So get your bathroom things and get ready for bed."

"Yes, ma'am," I said, slightly stunned at this turn of events.

The master bedroom had a small attached three-piece bathroom with a sink, toilet and shower cabinet. Diane was a shower person, as was I. She wanted me to go first, so I quickly brushed my teeth and did my usual routine before emerging from the room. The only light was a bedside lamp on a small night stand. I had removed my shirt and hung it on the end of the bed, waiting for Diane to go into the bathroom. Instead, she moved to me.

"Let me see your scars," she said, approaching me wearing a short nightshirt and panties. It was her customary attire and nothing had changed for either of us in the intervening year.

"Is this the stomach operation?" she asked, lightly tracing a long scar in the upper part of my abdomen.

"Yes. They did this last ... in August. The lung was first," I said, turning to show her the scar on my back left side."

"It must have been painful ... the recovery I mean," she said sympathetically.

"They had me on painkillers right from the start. It wasn't too bad."

"You look so different. So slim and ... fit. I can hardly remember when you looked like this."

"Neither can I," I admitted. "I don't plan to let myself go back there either."

I stripped to my shorts while Diane was in the bathroom and climbed into the bed. No hanky-panky, she said. My penis wasn't accepting that as it rose to the occasion. I hoped it wouldn't upset my ex-wife or cause her embarrassment. It was acting like an involuntary muscle. It had a mind of its own.

Diane emerged from the bathroom and climbed into bed, turning off the light. We lay in the darkness together for the first time in almost a year-and-a-half. I'd forgotten how much I liked scent of her bath powder. It did nothing to quell my erection. I felt her roll toward me and then a gentle kiss on the cheek.

"Good night, Doug. I'm glad you are here."

"Good night, Diane. I'm glad too."

I rolled to the outside and lay quietly, wishing for sleep to take me but knowing too much was going on in my head at that moment to allow it. I felt a wave of sadness overcome me at the loss of my family. For the first two or three months after Diane and the children had left I felt so lonely and desolate that I could barely function. Now, that sense of loss was coming back and I wondered what I could do to push it away.

I fell asleep at last, largely due to the travel and tension of seeing my family once more. My dreams were quite vivid that night. The scent of Diane in the bed with me was the stimulus. I didn't think it would be possible to sleep with an erection, but apparently I was wrong. I awoke sometime in the middle of the night with the need to use the bathroom.

When I returned, I carefully slipped under the covers again, hoping I wouldn't awaken Diane. I was lying on my side once more, facing away from her when I felt her arm on my body and she pulled herself into my back. It was another familiar thing from our past, but instead of upsetting me it calmed me, and I fell asleep once more.

I awoke the next morning to a warm hand gently gripping my erection. Her body was pressed into mine and from the feel of her groin on my ass I was sure she wasn't wearing any panties. I didn't know if Diane was awake or not, but I wasn't about to disturb her. My only worry was that I would have an unwanted ejaculation if she took this too far. This was not something that I was used to from my former wife.

She squeezed me gently a couple of times, then brought her hand up to my shoulder, kissing the back of my neck as she did so. Now I could feel her bare breasts pressing into my back.

"I thought you said no 'hanky-panky,'" I whispered.

"It's only hanky. No panky," she mumbled in reply.

"It's been a long time for me, so beware of unexpected eruptions," I whispered again.

"It's been a long time for me too. Maybe a morning session of 'panky' would be good for us."

"Don't kid about something like that," I rasped, my erection now threatening to get even more stimulated.

"Who said I was kidding. It's not like we're strangers. I haven't had a man in my bed since we parted. We may be divorced, but we aren't dead."

"I don't think I'd last very long. I haven't been with anyone either."

"Well, roll onto your back and let me look after that. We don't have a lot of time. The children will be up soon."

I followed her instructions and she quickly mounted me, pulling the front of my jockey shorts down, releasing my hardened member. She wasted no time in getting herself ready and then lowering herself onto me.

"Oh, God," she sighed. "I'd forgotten how good that feels."

I had my hands on her butt cheeks and was carefully moving into her, trying to preserve myself for as long as possible. She was covering my mouth with hers, her tongue pushing in and tangling with mine. So much of this was familiar, but it felt new as well. There was some urgency to our mating, something that hadn't been there for a long time. It was exciting.

Somehow I managed to survive for several minutes before I felt the inevitable end approach.

"I'm almost there, Diane," I warned.

"Yes ... just do it. Just do it," she moaned into my shoulder.

It wasn't a frantic, strenuous session. It was far more passionate and sensuous than I remembered our lovemaking in the past. It was different for both of us.

"That was so good," I said, kissing her lips.

"It's wasn't good ... it was great. Maybe I'll try and convince you to stay a while."

"Go ahead, convince me," I teased.

"I'll think about it," she said coyly.

"Who goes first?" I asked as I motioned to the bathroom.

"I better. I've got to get Debbie and Billy going and then Sandy. I drive her to playschool with one of the neighbor children. The other mother brings them home. She'll be in kindergarten next fall, thank goodness. At least I'll have them all going in the same direction."

I lay back in the bed, propped up on the pillow, wondering just exactly what had happened that morning. The sex was great. Hell, any sex was great. But this was different, and I think we both knew it.

Chapter 4 Hanging Around

I had my shower, shaved, and dressed in some clean clothes from my bag. I found I was in a great mood. Great sex first thing in the morning will do that to you, although I didn't have a lot of experience fall back on. I looked out the bedroom window and saw sunlight just now peeking from behind a nearby hill. The rain had gone. I didn't doubt it would be cool, but the sun matched my mood.

I wandered into the kitchen to find my three children at the kitchen table, each with a bowl of cereal in front of them.

"Hi Daddy," little Sandy said with her usual brilliant smile. I gave her a good morning kiss.

I got "Hi" from the other two as well.

Sandy was having Cheerios. Nothing unusual there. She'd been snacking on them since she was two. Billy had some version of little shredded wheat things that looked like they had sugar on them. Not the best start for the day, but I wasn't about to comment. Debbie had good old fashioned corn flakes. Good for you, girl.

I began to make some coffee, assuming that Diane still drank a cup in the morning. There was a coffee maker on the counter and it didn't take me long to find the ceramic jar where she kept the coffee. I set about making a pot. As I went to the cupboard to find the mugs, I felt two arms wrap around me and give me a nice, warm hug.

I turned in Diane's arms and hugged her back, kissing her briefly on the lips. The look in her eyes was one that said this morning meant as much to her as it did to me.

"Dad, are you going to stay now?" Debbie asked, obviously reading the body language of her parents.

"That depends on your mother," I answered. "I have to start looking for a job and finding a place where I can do my physical therapy."

"Your father is welcome to stay here as long as he wants," Diane said to the children.

"Yay!" was Sandy's response. I saw Billy's head nodding as he had a mouthful of cereal at the time. I was sure that Debbie was in agreement, so I felt I could answer the question.

"I'll be here for a bit, I guess. I can't say what might happen in the future. But it will be good to be with you all for a while."

"Why can't you stay forever, Daddy?" Sandy asked, looking to be on the verge of tears.

"Your mommy and I don't live together any more, Sandy. But I'm going to try and find a job not so far away and then I can see you more often."

"But I want you to live here, Daddy!" she said, banging her spoon on the table.

I was about to answer when Diane intervened.

"It's all right, Sandy. Your daddy is going to be seeing you tomorrow and the next day too. He won't be far away. I promise."

That seemed to settle her and I felt grateful to Diane for handling the situation. But it wasn't settled, really. How long I would stay wasn't certain and Diane wasn't suggesting it was reconciliation as much as I might wish she were. We were just forestalling the ultimate day of departure.

I got a hug and kiss from Debbie and a hug from Billy and they were off to school. Sandy was pulling on her winter coat and getting ready to go to playschool with her mother. I kissed the little cutie bye-bye and told her I'd be here when she got home. That got me a big smile. It also got me a kindly look from Diane.

While she was gone, I pulled out the phone book and looked up community recreation centers. I had no intention of joining some fitness outfit that would want a year's membership in advance. The community run ones usually had a day-to-day charge for visitors and that's what I was looking for. My map and the phone book located one not far from Diane's house and I called them. Sure enough, they would be happy to have me as a day member, a ten-day member, a monthly, quarterly or yearly member. That's what I was looking for.

Diane's house was located in an area south of the city near a little town called Taylorsville. Now that it was daylight, I could see that there was quite a bit of open land between the houses and it indicated the lot sizes were generous. Her house was fairly new and appeared to be in very good condition. I wondered if she was renting or had purchased it.