Somewhere East of Eden

Then he said gently to Adah, "I know your life was hard. There are souls on earth who simply can't rise above their base animal nature."

Adah said sardonically, "Yeah, I ran into a few baboons down there and most of them weren't the ones I was locked up with."

Gabriel chuckled and said, "Some people are simply beyond redemption. They're too simple-minded to understand or control their impulses, so we just recycle them. Their sentence is a life of discontent, anger, and backbreaking toil on earth."

Then he added as clarification, "My brother Lucifer is responsible for that part of our operation."

I said, "Isn't Lucifer...?" Gabriel quickly cut me off with, "Yes, I suppose that's how the people who spend eternity in a perpetual state of resentment and despair would view their jailor. There are worse things than a fiery pit, you know."

I was starting to understand a bit more about transcendental cosmology. Gabriel turned to me and said out of the blue, "Do you bike?" I said, "If you mean, do I know how to ride a bicycle, then the answer is yes. If you mean, did I ever own a Harley, then the answer is no?" Adah said teasing, "Pussy!"

That was the first time Adah had ever kidded. Both of us looked at her approvingly and laughed. My little friend was starting to break down the fortress walls that she had built to protect herself. Gabriel went on with, "There are some excellent bike trails around the island. You two might like to try one of them this afternoon. The island's flora and fauna are breathtaking."

Adah looked at me like she was asking me what I thought. I said, "That's a great idea Gabriel. We didn't have much in the way of exotic plants and animals in rural Ohio, just cows." Adah said enthusiastically, "Give me fifteen minutes to change and I'll meet you at the bike stand," and she rushed off in the direction of her room.

Gabriel looked at me meaningfully and said, "She's starting to open up. That's a very good sign for both of you.

*****

There are moments that you remember like they were yesterday. Those are the times of great joy or sorrow, that stand out above the slow march of the rest of the days of our lives. That afternoon was one of them.

I changed into a Simms bush shirt and shorts with a pair of LL Bean lightweight hiking boots. Adah appeared in the same kind of trail shirt but with a pair of skintight Headlands cargo pants on. Those pants left everybody at the bike stand, male and female, staring in wonder.

It wasn't that there was anything wrong with Adah's outfit. In fact it was both tasteful and perfectly appropriate for what we were planning to do. But the pants highlighted her incredibly round tight hips, bubble butt, and implausibly long legs. It was an inspirational sight.

Adah's body was the female paradox, both tiny and yet full and substantial in a womanly way. The old Adah would have gone out of her way to hide her sexuality. This new trial version was proud of her womanhood. The goddess was beginning to emerge.

Gabriel had accompanied me down to the bike rack and he gave me another inexplicably supportive look. It was like he was confirming something he was hoping to see. He said, "She's starting to trust you. Don't let us down."

Adah for her part was friendlier than I had ever known her, almost happy, as we rode off down the neat asphalt bike trail and into a jungle utopia of plants, flowers, and fanciful wildlife. It was like we were the only people in paradise.

You'd probably get the same effect in a northern forest, of being engulfed by the natural world. But the difference in the tropics is that the environment is a riot of noise and colors. The parrots flitting through the trees were red and yellow and blue, the trees themselves were the deepest shade of green and the animal calls were a constant reminder of the variety of nature.

Gabriel had told me about the waterfall. I could hear it somewhere in the distance, the rushing of the water was distinct above the jungle noises. But I wasn't prepared for what I saw.

We came out of the jungle canopy and into a clearing at the foot of a cliff. There was a 200-foot ribbon of crystal-clear water cascading down that cliff rocks and into an idyllic pool at its foot. The clearing was cooler than the surrounding jungle because of the spray.

We got off our bikes and just stood there in awe, taking in that wonderful sight. As I stood there, I felt a small hand slip into mine. I glanced down and she was looking up at me with the most touching expression of tentative trust. I heard Gabriel say. "Don't let us down."

I smiled, gave her hand a squeeze and said, "I'm glad I could share this with you." She gave my hand a squeeze back and left it there. The spell lasted for several minutes. Then she seemed to recall what she was doing, yanked her hand back and said, "I want to see the beach."

I had led the way down to the waterfall. But I was chasing Adah the last mile. In those few minutes I was treated to another utterly stirring sight, her apple shaped ass as she peddled. It gave me the first truly sexual pang that I had felt in my entire time there.

We left the bikes at the end of the asphalt path and walked out onto the picture-perfect white sand of a beach that looked like it had been drawn by Degas. We stood at the shoreline watching the sun begin to drop below the horizon. As far as we could tell we were the last people on earth.

The offshore breeze was getting brisk so without thinking I extended my arm protectively. Adah hesitated for a second and then nestled against me slipping her arm around my back and resting her hand on my chest in that classic woman pose.

I could feel her shivering. It wasn't from the wind. I said quietly and sincerely, "I understand. But YOU need to accept that I would rather die than violate the gift of your trust."

Then because I'm a wise-ass I had to add, "But of course I'm already dead."

It was a stupid and insensitive joke that trivialized Adah's experiences. I immediately knew that I'd been out of line. But before I could apologize, Adah thumped me on the back and muttered, "Asshole!" However, she left her arm where it was.

Dusk was creeping up on us and we had a half hour ride back. So I said, "I hate to leave this perfect moment. But I don't want to get caught in the jungle at night."

She hesitantly broke our connection and said under her breath, "Maybe some guys are decent after all." Those words meant more to me than all the endearments from all of the women I had ever known.

It was full dark when we arrived back at the resort. She said, as if she'd decided something, "Can I buy you a drink. We both might be going our separate ways tomorrow and I don't want to part so soon." Her statement sent a lightning bolt of angst down my spine. So, of course I said, "Sure."

We walked into the hotel bar. It had the same upscale modern décor as the rest of the place. A number of couples were having what looked like intense conversations. That was odd. There was a booth available along the back wall, all mahogany, chrome, and sleek black leather.

We slipped into it facing each other. The waiter was my little friend with the white coat. We both ordered wine, mine a Bordeaux, hers a pinot grigio. The candlelight played across Adah's marvelous cheekbones and perfectly sculptured lips. Her huge, beautiful eyes were looking at me with the intensity women adopt when they want answers.

I knew what she was asking so I said, "Yes, you are the most desirable woman in the world. The old me would have begged you to come up to my room. But I've learned a couple of things while I've been here. The first is to be a little more aware of other's feelings and the second is to try to do the right thing based on what I know about the situation."

The intensity of her look went up a few megawatts. I said, "This place is a portal to another life. It's where we are supposed to understand what's important, and that there is actually such a thing as absolute right, or wrong."

I added, "I know that you were abused because you are beautiful." She started to say something. But I bulldozed past her, "Don't bother telling me. I know that you were as much a party to that exploitation as they were. Your sexuality is a two-edged sword. But the fact remains that every man you gave your trust to betrayed you."

She was waiting for me to finish. I said, "We are probably going our separate ways tomorrow and I don't want to be just like all those other fellows. You are the bravest and yet the most tragic person I have ever known, and I want to be the one truly honorable man in your life." So, let me assure you that I will not violate our newfound trust by acting like the others."

Was that ME saying those things? Maybe I had gotten a little bit smarter."

Adah started to react again, but I had to get it all out on the table. I said, "You were doomed by your personal flaws. But your courage and humanity drove you to persist. If we had more time we would fall in love. But we don't have it. So, I want to preserve this final perfect vision of you just as it is. Now I have to go. It's just too hard."

I started to get up, but she said anguished, "Wait!! There was something in her voice that had never been there before. It sounded commanding. She said, "We need to talk." Ahh, those four little words that no guy ever wants to hear.

She said, "I haven't been entirely honest with you Adam." I thought, "Oh shit!! What now?"

She took both of my hands in hers and looked at me with searing emotion as she said, "I AM the person you've known as Adah and I have had all of that woman's life experiences. Everything I've done and said belongs to that woman. But I am not her anymore. I am your test and now it is time for your choice."

Seriously!!?? Really??!! I didn't know how to react to that. My visit to this place was supposed to be all about absolute truth and this person had just told me it was a lie!!!

I said flabbergasted, "You'll have to explain that to me, since you have managed to utterly disillusion me. I thought this was the gateway to heaven, not some kind of cruel reality show aimed at making honest people look foolish."

Adah was absolutely radiating anxiety as she said, "Everything Gabriel told you is true and I am exactly as you understand me to be, it's just that we've left something out."

Adah was still holding my hand as she stared deeply into my eyes. She said forcefully, "Everything you know about me is real. It happened. But it happened in 1971. Since then I've been what is known as a 'lost soul', doomed to wander until I can rid myself of the mistrust and self-loathing that the events of my life built into me."

I was stunned, Fifty years!!! Adah was still talking, "I've tried to kill myself many times. It never works. I just wake up the next day back in my room. But I keep trying... anything to gain some peace. When you rescued me, Gabriel thought that you might be the person who could help me overcome my fears and self-doubt."

I said disgusted, "Okay, I understand now. So, it wasn't an act as much as the overseers of this funny-farm putting two lab rats in a box to see what happened. Well I'll tell you what happened. I fell totally and utterly in love with you. Now, as my reward I can get shipped to my brand-new life in a yurt in Patagonia and you can go back to trying to kill yourself. Does that about size it up?"

She said angrily, "It doesn't come close to "sizing it up." All I have ever wanted is one man who I can love, without having to worry that he will use me or betray me. I know that you are that man. So, I have chosen you.

She gestured dramatically around the room and said, "This is the Place of Choosing, and this ends your test. If you choose me, then your future is sealed."

*****

The idea of falling into bed after that deeply sublime moment would have been just too crass for words. Instead, we sat on the terrace, watched the ocean, and talked all night. There was a carpet of stars and a huge tropical moon. The nighttime breeze was scented with flowers. It was just Adah and me in our personal heaven.

Like most people, I'd led a conventional life. And so with me, what-you-saw-was-what-you-got, a quasi-grownup small-town Ohio punk with an inconsequential life.

But there were several distinct renderings of Adah. So, getting down to the bare metal of the woman required peeling back the layers of armor that she had been forced to grow to protect her tender self.

That exploration took a lot of conversation. Adah had led an unusually difficult life and she thoroughly hated herself by the end of it. She knew that her death was a reset. But because she was all too aware of her acts and their consequences, it was extraordinarily difficult for her to forgive herself.

Everybody knows that you've gotta admit your transgressions before you can move past them. But Adah had never had somebody to unburden herself to. Now she had me. I, in return, had a few things to get off my chest, none of them flattering. So, we talked and cried until the tropic sun cracked over the horizon. In the end we were absolved, and ready to move on together.

But first we had to finalize arrangements with Gabriel and of course, that meant breakfast. He was sitting at his usual spot tucking into a big arugula and pistachio pesto quiche and a hibiscus-colored cocktail that appeared to be mostly champagne.

He looked uncharacteristically happy as we approached hand-in-hand. He said exuberantly, "Sit down, sit down my friends, and tell me what you chose."

Adah said simply, "I trust him. I love him. I'm ready to move on."

Gabriel said delighted, "Splendid!! I knew that you would eventually find salvation!! That's why I backed you for so long with the Chairman." Then he turned to me and said, "What about you Adam?"

I said, "You're the boss Gabriel. So, you decide where I go next. But I promise you that I am a lot more self-aware then I was when I arrived and that I will spend eternity thinking about how my actions impact others, especially as they apply to this woman."

I took Adah's hand and said simply, "I love her." Adah smiled tenderly back at me.

Gabriel said heartily, "That's glorious!! Of course you'll both stay with us. I need an assistant to handle the more pedestrian sinners. I'm sure you will fill that role admirably." Did he just call me boring?

He turned to Adah and said warmly, "Azrael needs help with the souls in the Hall of Consequences. People can be a real handful when they finally understand what their lives actually amounted to. She can use your unique perspective to help them truly accept what they are."

I understood the offer. Gabriel was putting Adah and me on heaven's payroll. I wondered if they issued a set of wings and a halo when you signed the contract? That would be so cool!!

There's no such thing as marriage in the place where we live. That's because, by definition, you don't need vows to do the right thing. Adah and I loved each other and that was all that was required.

We had a wonderful little condo in the block that the permanent residents lived in. It was just as luxurious as the main resort a few hundred meters down the beach. Every day we would walk to work down a crushed gravel path past brightly colored birds and fragrant greenery talking and laughing. We both knew that we'd found our Paradise.

EPILOG

So, that is how I came to spend eternity in the rebranded version of Heaven. I could take the elevator up to the penthouse and maybe I will someday, as long as Adah agrees to come along. It's just that it's all spirit up there and Adah and I still enjoy the pleasures of the flesh.

It's kind of a chicken or egg thing, do you need a happy life to shape a happy marriage. Or does the happy marriage inspire the happy life? Either way, Adah and I were permanently together. So, it was finally time to cement the physical bond.

We'd dined with Gabriel and Ariel that evening to celebrate our addition to the staff. The two of them had the same arrangement we had. Hence, it was like going out to eat with your folks.

Afterward, we were finally alone in our new condo and both of us were nervous as hell. That was a perfectly ridiculous situation when you consider that I was an experienced adulterer and Adah had spent her last year on earth working as a prostitute. Yet, the fact remained that there wasn't a single time in Adah's entire life when sex was an act of love.

That was behind her now. But naturally, some of the old anxieties lingered and we were back to tip-toing around each other like we had prior to our choosing. Adah was sitting on the edge of our brown Townsend roll-end leather sofa balancing a small crème-de-menthe flute on one of her round knees. Her remarkably lovely face reflected her extreme uneasiness.

I was pacing back and forth between the living room and our balcony overlooking the ocean jingling a Dewars 12 on the rocks. Eve was the one who had endured a lifetime of the wrong kind of sex, and she had to be ready. So, I wanted my beloved companion to take the first step.

She said timidly, "I'm not brave enough. You're going to have to do this for me." Her huge eyes held a mixture of fear and desire. I put my drink down firmly, walked over to her, gently took her little crème-de-menthe flute, and set it on the coffee table in front of the couch.

Then I took her hand and raised her gently to her feet. She was staring at me like a bird with a snake. I led her gently into our bedroom suite. She was wearing another one of her stunning little black dresses with an 18-inch solid gold chain in the scoop above her perfectly formed cleavage.

I turned her to face me. She was panting from fear, not desire. But Adah was stalwart. She knew that this was the last obstacle to eternal bliss, and she was determined to see it through.

The most intimate we had been prior to signing our contract with heaven was a little hand holding. We had never even kissed. There was just too much shit in the air to open up that dangerous front. So, I started there. I took her cute, pointed little chin in my fingers and raised her beautiful lips to mine. They were soft and welcoming.

We just held that position for five or six seconds then Adah made a little strangled cry, and her lips came alive, writhing sensuously, twisting, and nipping. Her arms went around my neck and she moved her fabulous little body against mine. Her mouth opened and I could feel the passion building in her. It was time to turn up the heat.

I pulled her tightly to me. She came willingly, arms tightly hugging my neck. We held that for a minute or two, still kissing passionately. Then I broke the kiss and looked into her eyes. The willingness was there. It was a touching belief in me and my intentions.

I walked us over to the bed, still plastered against each other. At that point she turned and presented her back. I unzipped her dress and she shrugged out of it. Then she unsnapped her bra and turned to face me, chest heaving. She was making no effort to cover her beautiful, full breasts.

Her breasts were a major work of art, as appropriate to her lithe body as her gorgeous face was a compliment to her extreme beauty. They were like two big round pomegranates with little red nipples. Those were now very distinct, and that wasn't from the cold.

I undressed sat and patted the bed. She smiled mischievously and plopped next to me. I put my arms around her, and we fell backward kissing passionately. She was making little noises of pleasure as we were lying face to face devoured each other. All of Adah's hesitations were gone now.

I'd planned to consummate our love in the gentlest way possible. I wanted Adah to see that sex can be an act of joining not dominance. I only had a hazy idea about the kinky things my love had endured in her life and during her short career on the streets. But the idea was to overwrite those memories with the gentlest lovemaking possible.