Spring Fling

Finally spring break was here. All the cool kids were, of course, going away to someplace hot to party. I, on the other hand, didn't have parents who were made of money and would pay for such frivolity. Not that I would ever be invited anyway. Instead I was on my way up to St. Clair, to spend a week and an half earning two college credits in biology as part of the university's 'early start' program. Apparently I don't get enough school in actual school and wanted more.

St. Clair was also my first trip as a full fledged adult, having turned 18 last month. This fact had been hammered home by the information sheet for the parents emphasizing that the 18 year olds would have 'minimal supervision', which I guess for me meant...I could read late into the night? Anyway, no one else from school was going as far as I knew, but everyone going from the region was meeting up at another school to caravan up there.

Mom and Dad dropped me off Saturday morning and I found my way to the check in table. About 60 people were going, mostly high school seniors like me, but a few teachers also. There was already a group of chatty girls and I dreaded the thought of being stuck in a van with them. Therefore, I picked the last seat in truck 3, figuring there would be fewer people. It turns out it was the only seat in truck 3, the other being the driver's seat of a U-haul. I tossed my bag in and sat down, staring out the window while I waited. The driver's door opened, and in hopped Kevin from my school.

"Hey, how's it going?" he smiled easily. "St. Clair?"

"Uh, yeah," I stumbled.

Kevin was hot. Like wow hot. Like I don't even exist in his world hot. He was popular. He was an athlete. As much as I try to stay our of high school drama even I knew he had been with several girls. Oddly my first thought was kicking myself for wearing such a crappy outfit, a random tee and skirt. I instinctively pushed my glasses further up my nose. I felt absurdly exposed, as it was hot out and I hadn't worn my usual flannel shirt over everything. I managed to get my name out, figuring he might not even know who I was. He pointed out that we were in the same social studies class. I stared out the window, heart racing, wondering how I was going to last six hours with him. We started to chat. He was nice. He made me laugh. Before we even got on the highway the questions changed.

"So how about you? You got a boyfriend?"

"I...uh, no."

"Why not?"

"Um."

"You're cute enough," he said, glancing over at me. "If you're into that look," he winked.

"Uh, excuse me," I snapped, grinning, "I like my look."

"Your 'keep boys away' look?" His eyes were sparking and he was smiling as he glanced over.

"I do not have a 'keep away' look!"

"Well then why don't you have a guy? Maybe it's your brainiac attitude," he teased.

I stuck my tongue out at him in response, to which he chuckled.

"I'm just playing with you, Abby. I'd totally hit that."

"Excuse me!" I protested, a grin still stuck on my face. "You're not going to 'hit that'. Now keep your eyes on the road." He paused for a moment.

"You have at least had a boyfriend, right?"

"This conversation is over," I said, blushing furiously and looking out the side window so he couldn't see. No, I had never had a boyfriend. Never kissed a boy. Boys never looked at me like that. I nervously adjusted my glasses, then kicked myself for drawing even more attention to them. I have a terrible tic that when I'm flustered or embarrassed, I grin. I couldn't imagine anything more embarrassing than having this conversation with Kevin. I had basically just admitted to one of the hottest guys in school that I was a five star virgin: never had a boyfriend, never been kissed, never been felt up, never given a blowjob, never had sex. Nothing.

"You've never had a boyfriend?" he asked incredulously. I didn't reply. "Okay, I guess. I'm sure you're just waiting for the right guy. Or maybe you're into girls?"

"This conversation is over," I repeated, trying to put more conviction in my voice.

"Oh my God, you're into girls! Abby, that is totally cool. I won't tell anyone, don't you worry about it. You have a steady girlfriend or just rotating hookups?"

I looked at him, exasperated, my face burning in embarrassment.

"No, I'm not into girls! This conversation is over."

"Surely you've met someone at, like, one of these camps to fool around with, right?"

By now I was holding my forehead in disbelief, a grin plastered on my face. "Not having this conversation."

"So...like...have you kissed a guy?"

"Not having this conversation," I sang.

"Okay, okay, I can see I hit a nerve. No, it's fine, to each their own, right? Socrates said that."

"No, it's an idiom. No one said it."

"Hey now, no need to go calling me an idiot. I'm just trying to be nice."

"IDIOM! I said idiom, not idiot. Idiot."

"I know, I know, you think since I'm a jock I have to be stupid. Maybe I should just start talkin' hick speek lahke dis, is dat betta, missy miss?"

"Drop the freaking accent, I do not think you're stupid!" Despite our words it was all playful and I was totally struggling not to giggle.

"Then why did you call me an idiot?"

"Idiom! I said idiom! Oh my God!"

"Then why did you call me an idiom."

"I...you...you know what? This conversation is over."

"You're awfully hard to talk to."

"I'm hard to talk to? I'm hard to talk to? You're the one who's twisting my words around!"

"Well if you, miss smarty pants, weren't such a know-it-all and putting me down, I wouldn't have to."

"You know what? This conversation is over. If you weren't driving, I'd slap you."

"Oh, so now you're getting violent. You know, if you had a boyfriend, you could work off some of you excess energy in a better way," he grinned, winking at me.

"Not having this conversation," I said, shaking my head defiantly and looking out the side window with my nose in the air.

"I could even give you some pointers."

"Not having this conversation."

"Starting with kissing."

"Not having this conversation," I repeated, exasperated and blushing. He paused for a few moments.

"You know what, I'm sorry. We've got a long ride in front of us, and I don't want to have you all pouty. So I'd like to apologize."

I sighed and turned to him. "I'm sorry too."

"Pleased to meet you, sorry two. I'm Kevin. Where is sorry one?"

I slapped my forehead and we shared a laugh.

"So, sorry two, do you have any friends who aren't sorry?"

"No, all my friends are sorry."

"That's too bad. You should get better friends."

"Yes I should."

"Maybe then you could find a boyfriend."

I rolled my eyes. "Are you back on that again?"

"No, it's cool. So what are you going to camp for?"

And so it went, and we hadn't even left town. For the better part of an hour we talked, getting along like best friends. He was ridiculously easy to talk to. He was also going to get credits for college, as a benefit of his college scholarship. We talked, we laughed, we told stories, we got to know each other. It was really nice, but really weird talking to one of the hottest guys in school. But the conversation bent again.

"So I don't get it, and I hate to bring it up again. You're smart, funny, eh," he said, glancing over me, "you could dress better, but why haven't you had a boyfriend?"

By this time the edge was off and I sighed.

"It just...never happened."

"That's it?"

"Yeah, pretty much."

"You want a boyfriend?"

"I mean...yeah, I guess."

"You guess? Just a box to check or because you want a guy?"

"I mean, yeah, I want a guy. It's hard, you know, walking around school and seeing all those happy couples."

"You ever, like, flirt with a guy?"

"Ah, no, not me. Not a flirt."

"None of your girlfriends ever give you pointers?"

I shook my head.

"Here, try this, say 'Hey Kevin, what are you doing tonight'?"

I rolled my eyes and just shook my head. He tried to get me to say all sorts of lines, but I just shook my head and blushed. I also couldn't stop grinning.

"How about this, hey Kevin, do you like my...um," he paused. "So like, I don't want to offend you delicate ears, what do you call your...um...," he said, glancing at my chest. I blushed anew and looked out the side window.

"Not having this conversation."

"What a weird phrase. I've heard of girls naming them, but that is a really odd name."

I held my head in my hand. "Okay, you know what? They're called breasts." My blush was back with a vengeance.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Breasts."

"What?"

"Breasts!" I shouted, laughing at the situation, completely embarrassed at having to yell it at him.

"Yeah, I think I like how that sounds. Breasts, yeah. Sounds nice."

"Knock it off."

"What? Why? It's just what they're called. Breasts. Breasts breasts breasts breasts."

"Oh my God," I said once again, shaking my head and looking out the window.

"So, do you know what the underwear that goes on breasts is called?"

I looked at him in disbelief. "Yes."

"What's it called?"

I stared at him. "Not having this conversation," I said, turning away.

"You don't know, do you?"

"Not having this conversation," I sang, looking out the window.

"Bra. It's called a bra. A bra is an undergarment used to support and..."

"Kevin, I'm a girl," I giggled, turning to him. "I wear bras. I know what they are."

"I don't think so. You are just trying to get away from admitting you didn't know what it was called."

"No I'm not!"

"Ally, come on. It's okay, and look, you just learned something even on your first day of spring break."

"No, seriously, I know what a bra is. I've been wearing them for years."

"Then why couldn't you name it?"

"I...," I started, then shook my head and looked out the window.

"Okay, I'll tell you what. I'll give you another chance."

"Great," I sighed, rolling my eyes.

"What are your lower undergarments called?"

"Kevin, oh my God."

"Well? Do you know what they are called or not?"

I felt trapped. It was embarrassing to have to say all these words in front of him, but silly because not saying them just gave him a chance to toy with me more.

"Yes."

"Then tell me what they are called."

I sighed. "Panties."

"What?"

"Panties," I repeated, shaking my head and blushing.

"Panties? They're called panties?" he asked, bewildered. "I thought they were called thongs."

I sighed again.

"No seriously, they're called panties? My girlfriends always called them thongs."

My face felt like it was on fire. Here I was again, getting pulled into a ridiculously embarrassing discussion about panties. I shook my head and decided to play along.

"Thongs are a subset of panties."

"How so?"

"So, like a thong, oh my God," I started, then realized what I would have to say. "You know what? This conversation is over."

"No, seriously, I'm curious. How are thongs different from panties."

I took a deep breath, knowing he wouldn't let it drop.

"A thong is a panty that...goes up...ah...between a girl's cheeks. Regular panties go over her butt, kind of like a guy's underwear."

"You mean like a jock?"

"No, like...like normal guy's underwear. I can't believe I'm having this conversation."

"I don't get it. Like, I wear a jock strap when I wear a cup during football, but otherwise, nothing."

I looked at him, shocked. "Kevin, too much information."

"Just kidding," he grinned and we shared a brief laugh.

"You're such a pervert," I accused.

He reached down to his groin and felt himself. Right in front of me.

"Yup, I got one. That makes me a pervert."

"Kevin, oh my God."

"What? It comes with the territory."

"Yeah but, there's no need to grab your..." My brain slammed on the brakes to late. "Your...um...yeah. That."

"That?" he asked incredulously. "Abby, you don't even know what it is called?"

I turned to look out the window. "Oh my God."

"Well, that's what most girls say when they see it, but that's not what it's called."

"You know what? This conversation is over."

"You really don't know what it is called, do you?"

"Not having this conversation."

"Did you play hookie all week during sex ed?"

"Not having this conversation," I sang.

"Ha ha, you did!"

"No I didn't!"

"Then how do you not know what it is called? Aren't you looking to major in biology? Didn't old Wiggy make you say it out loud?"

I just shook my head. Saying it in a room full of other girls was much easier than saying it to him.

"Do you want me to tell you what it's called?"

"Kevin, oh my God."

"You really don't know, do you?"

I sighed and closed my eyes and gave in. "Penis," I said quietly, feeling a new blush come over me.

"I'm sorry, what? I couldn't hear that."

"Penis."

"What?"

"Penis," I shouted, laughing in disbelief at the conversation. "This is unbelievable," I muttered to myself

"Yeah, that's it! We'll do a little response song, just like that okay?" he said, and then chanted rhythmically "When I say 'suck it' you say 'penis'. Suck it!"

I buried my head in my hands.

"Suck it!"

I looked at him, grinning as I shook my head.

"You know, you're terrible at this."

I knew what was coming next. We had covered my breasts, my bra, my panties, his penis, next was going to my vagina. And he was going to needle me until I screamed it at him. My face was actually getting sore from grinning so hard. Then, from out of the blue, he spotted a billboard.

"Hey look, the Cahokia mounds are ahead. You ever go there?"

And just like that we were talking about normal things again. Miles peeled by as we talked about places we'd been and places we wanted to go. It turns out he was looking to major in archaeology and had been to quite a few historical sites in the region. He told me about the history of the Cahokia civilization and how it's collapse was dramatic and unexplained.

The CB radio squawked and he answered it. The caravan was going to hit a truck stop in 20 minutes. I glanced at my watch, we had been on the road for over three hours. Time had flown by. We continued to talk, and he had just told me about a prank he and a couple of other guys had pulled on our rival high school.

"Wow, that's pretty daring," I said, impressed.

"So what is the most daring thing you have ever done?"

"I...I mean...I don't know."

"Nothing?"

My mind spun. I had helped put Sally's bra in the freezer that one slumber party, did that count? I had snuck a cheat sheet into Mr. Havlerson's exam but ended up not using it. I shrugged.

"Nothing."

He paused for a moment in thought. "Hell of a way to live a life, always staying in bounds."

"I'm just boring like that."

"Is that really what you think? That you're boring?"

The wind left my sails and a wave of depression swept over me. I am boring. If I died today and they wrote my biography it would be boring. No wonder no one liked me.

"Yeah. Probably why I can't find a boyfriend."

"Do you want to be the boring girl?"

I looked at him and frowned, tears threatening my eyes. "No," I said softly.

Well, why don't you do something daring now?"

"Like what, I'm in a U-haul."

He turned to me with smoldering eyes. "Take your panties off," he said with a deeper husk in his voice.

"What?" I practically gasped, sitting bolt upright and looking around as if someone might have heard.

He glanced at me again. "Take your panties off before we get to the truck stop. No one but us will know. But you'll know every time I look at you what I'm thinking of."

It was like a punch to the gut. I was pretty sure my panties had just incinerated. I looked around at the scenery as we approached the exit. Suddenly I decided to do it.

"Don't look," I pleaded as I slipped a hand under my skirt.

My heart took off as I squirmed, slowly working my panties past my butt. My panties, fortunately a nice if plain pink pair, cleared my skirt and then I slipped them off completely. I balled them into my fist and looked out the window, my head spinning.

"Give them to me."

"Kevin, no, I...," I started, but then relented.

I placed them into his hand and he shoved them into his pocket with a quick wink. We hit the exit ramp and soon were pulling into the gas pumps. He put it in park and then looked at me with a wolfish grin.

"Daring," he nodded approvingly as he stepped out.

I left the truck cab on wobbly knees and acutely aware I had no panties on. It is kind of difficult to get out of the high cab of a truck while in a skirt without flashing anyone, fortunately no one was around. I tried to look casual as I joined the rest of the group but I was complexly on edge and red faced. We had lunch at the restaurant, and Kevin and I found a table, quickly joined by a boy named Mathis who already knew Kevin. Moments later three other girls, apparently friends with Mathis, came over. I immediately felt like the ugly duckling, but every so often Kevin would give me this look that just made a pit in my stomach. Naturally, the other five happily chatted away. I could barely get a word in edgewise. The blonde girl next to me was definitely trying to attract Kevin's attention, and it was working. It turned out she was going to be in the same biology class I was.

"You know," Kevin said, "Abby here is a straight-A student in biology. I bet if you have any problems she can help you."

"Oh, really," Leigh smiled, "That would be great. Thanks for the tip."

"Maybe you can pay me back sometime."

"Maybe," she agreed with a grin.

I focused on my food and tried to tell myself that Kevin wasn't my boyfriend, that it was fine that he was flirting with other girls, but I still felt a pang of jealousy.

"I'm taking the chemistry class," Lisa chirped, "Even though I'm really bad at it."

"Well that's pretty daring," Kevin smiled. "What is the most daring thing you've ever done, Abby?"

My panicked eyes flashed to his and I blushed scarlet before looking down.

"Nothing," I mumbled.

"Nothing?" he asked. "Surely you've done something daring. Oh, maybe you meant like wearing nothing? Did you go streaking?"

The other girls laughed as I wanted to crawl into a hole and die. Leigh leaned over and hugged me and told him to leave me alone. I glanced at him and he gave me this look that told me exactly what he was thinking.

"No, actually Abby was telling me about her classes on the drive. She's going to be a biology major, right?"

"Sounds thrilling," Lisa sniped.

"It was," Kevin agreed with a subtle wink at me. "She was even shouting at some points. What were those things you were shouting?"

I just shoved another bite of salad into my mouth to avoid answering, knowing perfectly well what I had been shouting. Breasts. Panties. Penis. Good Lord I must have sounded depraved! I would never be able to explain what happened.

"You must really be into biology," Leigh smiled. "Are you always this red?"

I just nodded with my full mouth. "Genetic," I managed to mumble and quickly shoved another fork full in.

Fortunately the conversation drifted to safer topics. I tried to join, but with three girls babbling about celebrities I didn't have much to add. The good thing was that this gave me a chance to compose myself a bit. Valerie was reading the placemat of the diner and it had a simple riddle about the ages of a man. The girls all puzzled over it for a few minutes and I just kept quiet, since I knew the story already. Finally they figured it out and were very pleased with themselves. Then Kevin spoke up.

"I've got a riddle. It's from 'The Hobbit', anybody read that book?" I looked at him eagerly, as I had read the book twice. "It's from when Baggins and Golem are in the caves." He paused and looked right into my eyes. "What's in my pocket?"