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How could I tell this man the truth, assuming even I knew the "truth" of their machinations. My brother-in-law Ben was an exemplary, salt of the earth husband and father. He was a reliable civil engineer who did field research in perfecting lubricants for heavy road building machines. Now that alone gave him credibility.
Am I to say, "Ben, be happy your whore wife is away being the best whore Istanbul ever welcomed?"
How do I say, "Ben, if your wife, who unfortunately was my sister, ever returns to our shores, the FBI will execute an arrest warrant and prosecutors will convict her of multiple felonies."
Of course, there are important reservations about the fed cops that must be reconciled with the supposition of that outcome. Time will tell.
Informing Ben of Connie's new relevance and comprehensive irreverence would be painful. He would never understand that his wife now enjoyed bi weekly STD testing, an inconvenience of her trade.
Karen entered my office and temporarily turned off the video and audio recorders in the grandfather's clock. She had definitive news of the locale of my wife's business meeting of the afternoon.
Oh, yes, Dr. Morgan Bancroft and my sister were auctioned at the international whore market. They brought a record price, too. But within weeks Morgan had bought their freedom and seized control of her captor's organization. Connie opened her own store but continues to whore and manage whores for Morgan.
"Dr. Morgan Bancroft's Gulfstream 650 has just landed at Tijuana's General Albelardo L. Rodriguez International Airport," Karen reported. "Morgan is negotiating a joint venture with The Global Whore Exchange of The Baja."
Morgan had earned her CEO title at long last. After many perils, trials and tribulations, most of which defy even Zeus's credulity, Morgan had become the soul of a billion-dollar global enterprise.
Incredibly, Dr. Morgan Bancroft had engineered a merger between Global Politico Schemers Anonymous and a combine consisting of Boko Haram, ISIS and American Sluts for Nihilism.
Not that it matters, I announced that I would not seek reelection to the Senate. I took my own advice and read Voltaire's Candide once again. Dr. Pangloss fascinated me
I was offered a partnership in Global Mercenaries, LLC. My first opportunity to negotiate a contract required travel to Mogadishu to meet with a famous pirate. Given the status of the world, raiding freighters and tankers on the Indian Ocean was not all that different from being elected to a congress.
Voltaire's Dr. Pangloss had scored once more: "In this best of all possible worlds, everything is for the best." (Or variants thereof.)
Well! That's my story. Must run.
My tuxedo is ready.
Sunday, I'm walking Karen down the aisle.
I am certain she will be ecstatically happy with Lt. Col. Billy Mitchell McDonald.
Karen is learning to fly.
END
