The Angel Across the Hall

Maria was an angel; there really was no other way to put it. Well, maybe savior or goddess or something like that, but angel just seemed to fit her better. She was a kind, merciful, loving spirit encased in a lovely body with a gentle face and a beautiful heart. Just when everything in Carrie's life seemed bound, bent and determined to bring her to her knees in agonized surrender and defeat Maria appeared to make it all better which just her presence, her kind words and soft loving touch.

To think now that Carrie had almost shot Maria down when she made her first overtures of friendship was almost unbearable, but it was true. She'd almost missed out on the best thing to ever happen in her life because she didn't know what to say when her beautiful, friendly new neighbor kindly invited over for a coffee that quickly turned into her first real friendship since moving out of her parents house into her brand new apartment a good hundred miles away from everyone and everything she knew. It was for a job and a chance to continue her education on her own time and with her own money at somewhere else besides the crappy party school she'd previously dropped out of.

Not that any of that had anything to do with why she almost said no to Maria when she offered her a cup of coffee and some conversation while they both waited for the only two functioning dryers in their building to be empty. No, that was more because Carrie was just a naturally shy person. In fact, most people who knew her back home would have been shocked to even see her talking to Maria. She was just one of those people that took quite a bit of effort to meet new people and turn them into friends, but there was just something about Maria that made her feel almost instantly comfortable around her from the very first moment they ran into each other as well the many times that followed.

It wasn't that Maria did anything unusual. She just kept on trying until she broke through. It was almost like she actively wanted to befriend Carrie for some reason that Carrie just couldn't fathom. Every time they ran into each other Maria just seemed to find a way to chip away just a little bit more of the wall Carrie put up around herself and Carrie just let her do it. Why? She had no idea, but she did. There was just something about her friendly new neighbor that made Carrie want to let her break down her defenses.

Maybe it was just loneliness brought on by the fact that she was so far away from home. Maybe it was just boredom with her life of classes and slaving away at a job that barely paid her rent and bills most months. Maybe it was just nice to see a friendly face that wasn't checking out her tits or her ass whenever they thought she wasn't looking. She didn't really know, but after about a month of making small talk in the laundry room and exchanging smiles in the hall she began to realize that she actually looked forward to it.

But it wasn't only that. Maria was hardly the only person who made overtures of friendship to Carrie frequently. She was just the only one that even piqued her interests. Even the cute guy who worked at the gas station around the corner who made a habit of flirting with her in nice, low key fashion when she stopped in was usually rewarded with nothing more than a shy smile. Same for Marcus, her co-worker who wasted a lot of time and energy trying to talk her into going out with him after work or any number of men who just couldn't help but try to pick her up no matter how many times she shyly shot them down for reasons that weren't even clear to Carrie herself.

There was just something different about lovely Maria, with her bright green eyes, lovely light brown skin and long, silky looking black hair that made Carrie's heart go all aflutter whenever she even hinted at going to a bar with Carrie in a casual, non-committed fashion. Even when Carrie was sure it was nothing but idle conversation between two twenty something girls she couldn't help but hope that someday they actually would go to a bar or a club together or anywhere really and not just because she was bored or even lonely. No, deep down she knew there was something more, something deeper. Sadly, this feeling scared the crap out of her even though she occasionally got the feeling that she wasn't the only thinking along those lines.

Of course, during moments when Carrie felt like being truly honest with herself, it was pretty easy to see that that feeling, that vague, little hint of mutual attraction was the reason she both feared and desired allowing Maria entry into her life. Not because it was the first she'd had those feelings. In fact, it wasn't even the second or the third. No, Carrie had had those feelings many times before, but only once had she allowed herself to explore those feelings and it had been both the most wonderful and most depressing chapter of her young life. In one beautiful, glorious night she'd discovered what sex was truly all about and at the same time she'd destroyed a lifelong friendship in a way that could never be repaired. It was a memory of both overwhelming joy and deep, dark sadness, but it was a memory Carrie wouldn't have given up for the entire world. Still, she obviously wished it could've ended better, but it hadn't and that fact helped make it hard for her to try and find that good feeling again out of the fear that she'd only destroy another friendship by doing so.

The girl in question, Hanna was her name, had been her best friend for as long as Carrie could remember and they'd shared everything with each other over the many years of their friendship. Hanna had been there through thick and thin. Every event that seems so important when girls are young, every thing that builds those memories people grow to cherish and regret, had been shared between them both. They smoked their first cigarette together(and hated it), their first beer, first joint, skipped their first class and even lost their virginity on the same night, in the same house separated by only one thin wall and both found the experience equally lacking.

And through everything there was always something brewing just below the surface that they both felt, but could never articulate until one night when they were all alone, drunk on Boone's Farms Strawberry Hill reminiscing about the night many years ago, by eighteen year old girl standards, they'd shared their first "practice" kiss laughing about the silliness of it all when it just kind of happened and before Carrie could even register it fully they were kissing once again.

And then again and again and then clothes were being tossed to the floor, kisses moved from softly exploring each other's mouth to kissing and suckling each other's breasts and beyond until they fell asleep in each other's arms pressing their naked bodies together seemingly at peace with what they'd done. It had been the single best night of Carrie's young life and she'd never slept better. Her dreams had been peaceful and everything seemed right with the world until she woke up the next morning to find herself alone.

Still, she'd only been mildly disappointed until she tried calling Hanna only to receive no answer. She even allowed herself to write it all off when Hanna still hadn't answered or returned any of her phone calls a full week later, but when Carrie finally broke down and went to Hanna's house to see what was up Carrie had finally run out of excuses. Hanna, Hanna's mother had told her reluctantly and with more than a bit of sympathy in her voice, didn't want to see Carrie, didn't want to talk to her and didn't want her to call her anymore.

For a moment Carrie had stood there on her best friend's doorstep absolutely stunned while Hanna's mother tried her best to soften the blow until she just turned and walked back to her car completely and totally stunned. She'd even managed to make it halfway home before it finally hit her and the tears began to flow freely and barely stopped for what seemed like days, almost weeks after. In fact, as summer drew to a close and she headed off to her first semester of college she was still not quite right. Even her mother, not usually the most caring parent in the world, had noticed and even tried to find what was wrong to no avail before Carrie headed off to school where she found some small amount of solace by throwing herself into her schoolwork and the softball team while ignoring almost all invitations of friendship for several long months.

It wasn't until her second semester that she finally began to break out of her shell a bit and make friends again. Still, though, that was it. Just friends and nothing more. Even though opportunities to further explore the wonderful aspects of sex that she had discovered with Hanna arose more than once she never allowed it to advance past the flirtation stage. Oh, she'd wanted to more than once, but she could never find the strength to overcome her fear that it would just lead to more heartbreak and sadness and instead she just went without and settled instead for her fingers and toys and the occasional safe, and expected, but incredibly disappointing one night stand with some random, but emotionally safe guy.

Eventually she dropped out of college after her sophomore year, but that didn't put an end to the frustrating boondoggle that was Carrie's sex life. Every time she made friends with another woman it ended terribly as soon as she found herself developing feelings that went beyond friendship or worse sensed the same feelings from another woman. Her relationships with men were hardly different. Every time she "befriended" a man it ended after a night or two of boring, bad sex and then she'd make herself scarce until they got the point and left her alone.

And that was her sex life until she saved enough money to buy her own computer. Then her sex life became slightly more interesting if a bit more pathetic. Her miraculous discovery of the wonders of internet porn allowed her to explore the joys she'd denied herself in the safety and privacy of first her own room and then her own home. The internet also allowed her the freedom to flirt (and more) with other women through a filter. Carrie even allowed herself to make plans to meet a few, but she always chickened out at the last minute.

She seemed destined at the young age of twenty three to be doomed to the life of a lonely spinster who's only join in life was her small collection of sex toys and a hard drive full of girl/girl porn. In her sadder moments Carrie even contemplated getting a cat or seven just to make it official. As far as she was concerned she was doomed to live her life alone and unsatisfied for all eternity.

But then there was Maria, the beautiful and friendly girl across the hall who seemed to have no clue how much Carrie wanted her as they made idle conversation in the laundry room and hall. Maria also, Carrie was sure, had no idea how often she entered Carrie's thoughts late at night when she was abusing herself to images and stories of women making love to other women. If Maria ever were to learn this Carrie was absolutely certain that she would be nothing short of horrified at the thought. Who wouldn't be? As far as Carrie was concerned the answer to that last question was no one.

Hell, even without knowledge of all the naughty, evil sexual thoughts constantly brewing in the back of Carrie's mind Carrie still found it impossible to imagine that Maria could ever really seriously consider being her friend. Carrie's self esteem was simply too low to imagine anything good coming into her life, so when Maria asked Carrie to her apartment for a friendly cup of coffee one slow, boring Saturday afternoon when neither had nothing at all to do besides wait for the dryers to empty at first she could think of nothing for a second. Her mind just went blank and she froze for what seemed like forever before a little voice that she wasn't even sure was her own finally answered for her with a simple yes even as another much louder voice inside her head screamed out for her to run and hide. Still, she did as she said and followed Maria to her apartment forcing herself to smile and keep making small talk as they walked even as her insides tore themselves to shreds.

Fifteen minutes later however she was laughing and chatting happily as Maria poured her a second cup of delicious, warm and perfectly bitter coffee as they got to know each other in the cozy confines of Maria's wonderfully decorated apartment. As Maria kept refilling her cup and the conversation kept coming and coming Carrie quickly found herself getting more and more comfortable despite herself. By the time the coffee gave way to some ice cold Irish cream that evil little voice of fear deep in her mind was beginning to fade farther into the distance until Carrie, for the first time in what seemed forever, found herself actually having fun just being with another woman.

After that coffee together on laundry day quickly became something of ritual for them. Then coffee whenever they met in the hall or had free time away from work was added to the mix. This was followed by wine in the evenings on weekdays and soon the seemingly inevitable happened: Maria invited Carrie out to the club.

Of course, at first Carrie rejected the notion. After all, Maria had no idea how hard it was for Carrie to even drink wine with her. The inhibitions the alcohol loosened were almost maddening. Carrie was absolutely certain that one of those nights alone with Maria and a bottle of chardonnay the dam was almost certain to break, but she still kept right on doing it because it simply felt too good just to be around beautiful Maria sipping that delicious nectar and talking through whatever movie they were watching. Throw in some pumping beats, warm sweaty bodies and the sight of her crush dancing to that beat however, and it was just too much. Something bad was just bound to happen.

Luckily, however, Maria would have none of that. She absolutely insisted and left Carrie with no other choice: she was going to the club with Maria come hell or high water and that was all there was to it. Finally, Carrie caved.

"Okay, okay," Carrie had said in defeat, "But on one condition: I'm not going there to pick up any guys."

"Fine with me," Maria had responded with an odd little smile before making Carrie shake on it and adding "It's a date."

After that Carrie tried to maintain her free and happy mask, but as the evening wound down and she crossed the hall to her own apartment Carrie's mind was racing with both fear and anticipation. Still, the fear and anticipation were hardly enough to prevent her from heading straight to her room and fingering her pussy to a rapid and intense orgasm as she thought of Maria's warm, sweaty body pressed up against hers dancing at first across her mind's eye before Carrie's imagination quickly took the image to a very lewd and sexual place. Then she did it all again and then again until she finally fell asleep from self induced exhaustion only to awake the next day and head to work under a fog of trepidation over what was to come in only a few days time.

As the weekend grew closer this odd mixture of fear and lustful anticipation seemed to hang over Carrie like a cloud. It was so bad that she was almost grateful when Maria had to work late on Thursday night and therefore couldn't hang out just so she could have some time with her thoughts. Of course, the thoughts she was having were hardly what Carrie would call helpful as she basically spent the night splitting her time masturbating to internet porn like a horny teenage boy while picturing Maria in her head the whole time and pacing the floor worrying herself half to death over what was to come the following night.

When she woke up the next morning Carrie wasn't any better. She woke up feeling anxious and worried. She went to work feeling distracted and only half there. Even as she headed home she was still in a daze worrying about something she knew damned good and well she had no business being worried about. Of course, the knowledge that she was being an idiot worrying herself half to death over something that she should've been looking forward to didn't make her feel any better. In fact, it only made her feel worse.

By the time she got home the fear and anxiety hadn't abated one little bit. She tried to distract herself by smoking a bowl and putting a bit of extra time and caution into picking out her clothes and getting ready, but as the time ticked away relentlessly her irrational fear just seemed to keep building and building. Her heart seemed to be threatening to pound its way out of her chest until Maria knocked on her door at exactly 7:45 in the evening dressed in a tight yellow t-shirt for some band Carrie had never heard of and low cut jeans that were tight in all the right places and the cutest pink tennis shoes for nice mix of sexy and casual. Carrie was almost stunned silent at the sight of her, but if Maria noticed she didn't let it show. She only smiled sweetly and said "Ready?"

"Yeah, well, almost... I just..." Carrie started to lie before Maria interrupted her.

"That's not what you're wearing, is it?" Maria said with a frown as she looked Carrie up and down disapprovingly.

"What?" Carrie said sincerely.

"Nope," Maria said simply still frowning and gazing at Carrie's body and the admittedly non-sexy clothes that she'd chosen to wear before reaching out and grabbing Carrie's hand pulling her into Carrie's own bedroom. "That is not going to work. C'mon, you need better clothes than this."

"But... but..." Carrie tried to protest only to be silenced by Maria's will.

"I don't wanna hear it," Maria said calmly, but with a hint of playful defiance. "There is absolutely no reason a girl with a body like yours is going out to the club dressed like that. You look like a housewife. You need to show off your assets even if you're not trying to get laid."

Carrie was at loss for words. Part of her was more than a little miffed at being led around by her hand by someone she barely knew while having her fashion questioned while another part was absolutely elated to hear Maria compliment her body. It was a fairly even matched battle that continued even as Maria opened her bedroom door and urged to find something better.

"But I just want to get drunk and dance," Carrie finally spat out as Maria opened her closet. "I'm not trying to get picked up by guys or anything."

"What does that matter?" Maria said vaguely as she continued to invade Carrie's environment by searching through her closet before adding "Where's that cute black t-shirt you have?"

"What?" Carrie asked somewhat taken aback by the fact that Maria had noticed a t-shirt of hers.

"You know," Maria continued "That black one with the... Ah Ha!" and with that she pulled out the t-shirt in question and then continued searching through Carries clothes until she'd assembled an outfit from Carrie's admittedly small selection that met with Maria's approval and then told her to change. Carrie had no idea why she wasn't pissed, but she wasn't. There was just something about the whole thing that was both amusing and wonderful. It was also oddly elating to allow Maria to take control for a bit and she couldn't help but like that.

Finally, after heading to the bathroom and changing into her new outfits of her tight black t-shirt, her favorite naturally holey pair of jeans and some sneakers she'd actually forgotten she'd owned Maria finally granted her permission to leave with her with a exclamation of "Sexy!" followed quickly by "Now let's go get drunk and dance!" and then they were off.

By the time they got home Carrie was absolutely stunned by how much fun she'd just had. Maria was an absolute blast to hang out with it. Sure, she was a bit pushy at times, but as the night worn on Carrie found herself enjoying just going along with it all and enjoying every minute of it while wishing the night would never end. They both managed to drink themselves stupid while dancing wildly for almost three hours straight. Not with guys either, but which each other. Sure, some guys danced with them from time to time, but Carrie barely noticed as her eyes were locked on the lovely vision that was constantly before her dancing like a women possessed and claiming that nearly every song the DJ played was her favorite until Carrie just couldn't take anymore thanks to her sore feet. Luckily Maria wasn't the type to ignore her friends suffering and happily insisted that they go home.