The Crusader Ch. 01

Embarrassed Rollie apologized for staring. Tully waved off the apology. "You'd have to be dead or dumb not to be interested in something new to you. Don't worry about it Detective."

"Tully took retired from the Corp after 20 years but couldn't stand sitting at home," Steve informed Rollie. "He joined our police force and became the oldest rookie in the department's history; he was 36 at the time.

"If you put in 20 in the Marines does that means you enlisted when you were 16?" Rollie questioned.

"Yeah, I was big for my age and told them I was 18," Tully answered with a grin. "I also had a fake birth certificate and driver's license. Couldn't see the sense in waiting around for two more years. Joining the Marines was what I'd wanted to do since I'd been twelve. I wasn't much of a student, not motivated you see, so as soon as I could get the phony papers I joined up."

"I'm the one telling this story," Steve said with a laugh. "Anyway just to keep his hand in, Tully joined the National Guard shortly after completing his probationary period with the department. His unit was activated about ten months later and he went over to the sand box; that's where he lost his leg."

"My body had an adverse reaction to an exploding IED," Tully offered. "You know an Individual Explosive Device. Some gomer dropped one off a roof right on top of my squad." The Sergeant stopped for a few seconds staring off into space. "Lost two men and my leg that day." Tully smiled grimly and added, "The gomer lost his life: I put a round into his head when he peeked over the edge of the roof to see how his bomb had worked."

Steve patted Tully on the shoulder just once and Rollie nodded his admiration for the Sergeant.

"So Tully came back home after a stint in VA hospitals and wanted his job back," Steve continued his story. "The department tried to get him to retire, even offered full disability and a pension, but Tully told them as long as he could walk he wasn't disabled."

Turning to Rollie Steve said, "There's a federal law that says a company has to give a person his job back. The offer of a pension got the department off the hook as far as that went. But there are a few former Marines in positions of power in the department, our commissioner for one, and they saw to it that Tully was reinstated.

Steve and Tully laughed as they remembered the uproar. "Rather than manning a desk in some precinct or administrative duties Tully asked to be put in charge of the shooting range. That's where this broken down old Gunny Sergeant has been ever since."

Rollie stuck out his hand and shook with Tully again. "Thank you for your service Sergeant; both for 20 years in the Marines and for your National Guard duty."

Tully made a noise like he was clearing his throat, embarrassed by the emotions that the young detective brought out. "Numb Nuts here didn't mention that I teach tactical shotgun methods and do some sniper training for SWAT now and then." He smiled and then laughed. "I'm not just a pretty face you know."

"Back to business Gunny. I've been telling Rollie that if he carried a heavier weapon he wouldn't have to worry about Meth heads continuing to come at him after the first couple of rounds," Steve said. "Thought I'd let him try my 1911 on for size."

"Good weapon but it takes a little getting used to," Tully replied. "Let go over to the shooting bays.

Tully provide shooting glasses and special hearing protectors called 'cans'. "These headphones are electronically activated," he explained. "You can hear someone when they talk but the loud report of a weapon firing is shut out."

Rollie fired several rounds from Steve's Colt. "Got a lot of recoil don't it?"

"Yeah it does," Tully replied. "Some people just have to be old school," he said pointing his thumb at Adams with a smile. "Now me, I carry a .45 also," he said pulling his sidearm. He dropped the magazine, ejected the round from the chamber and handed it to Rollie. "This is a Glock 21C. Most of the recoil and blowback is vented out of these ports on the top of the slide. You can hold on target for your second shot a lot easier."

Rollie hefted the Glock. He looked at Tully and at his nod replaced the magazine and worked the action being careful to keep the weapon pointed down range. Rollie fired six shots at the paper target hanging ten yards away.

"That's very nice; he said and placed the pistol on the counter in front of him.

"It also carries 13 rounds as compared to 8 in the 1911," Tully told him. "There's a lot to be said for the 1911, but with new times comes new technology."

"Then why does the department issue 9MM instead of .40 cals or .45s?" Rollie asked.

"I guess they're following military guide lines," Tully replied. "The 9 has less recoil so supposedly an officer can get back on target easier. It fires a smaller bullet but at a higher muzzle velocity so it's supposed to be as effective. Not necessarily true but that's what they say."

"That's not the only reason," Steve said. "The force issues you a weapon with 50 rounds a month, right? The 9MM is cheaper as is the ammo than a .40 ca. or a .45, comparatively speaking. So it cost the department less to provide a weapon and ammo that if you carried almost any other weapon."

"Why a .45 Tully? Rollie asked. "Why not a Magnum?

"First Magnum's are not police department approved. They will do the same thing as a .45 but they're even harder to hold on target. Talk about recoil." Tully laughed and shook his head. "I saw a young Detective shoot a .44 Magnum, you know like Dirt Harry used." Rollie and Steve nodded that they knew the movie. "The kid thought it would be cool to carry a .44 but didn't know much about that type of weapon. The recoil threw it up and into his face. Had to get three stitches over his eye where the barrel hit him." Tully doubled over laughing. "Funniest thing I ever saw."

Catching his breath he asked, "You ever watch Star Trek?

"Huh? Well ya, hasn't everybody?" Rollie answered.

"Remember their weapons? Phasers they called them. They had two settings; kill and stun." Tully pointed at Rollie's 9MM. "Your 9 is a .45 on stun. You might bring em down but they could get up again." He paused and looked Rollie in the eye. "Steve's right kid; with the people you've been running into you need to carry a .45," Tully advised. "Okay, I'm done preaching. Who's buying lunch?"

Rollie bought a Glock 21C after lunch and qualified with it under Tully's tutorage later that afternoon.

And that's how I came to carry this, he said to himself as he patted the Glock on his hip. So far I haven't had to use it; thank God. He looked up from the files he was studying and saw Captain Mallory staring at him. Oh hell I've got to get going on this therapist bull, he thought. Pete looks like he meant what he said.

The phone on his desk rang and he picked it up. "First Squad, Detective Chambers," he answered.

"Detective Chambers, I'm Jessica Talbert. I was Susan's ....."

"Susan's therapist, yes I remember," Rollie interrupted. After a few seconds of silence he asked, "What can I do for you Doctor Talbert?"

"A Captain Mallory called me yesterday. He said he was your friend as well as your boss and that you'd been ordered to see a therapist. The Captain asked that I be that therapist; considering my experience with Susan and indirectly you too."

"I knew Pete wouldn't let it slide," Rollie mumbled. "I'll call you Doctor Talbert if I decide I want to see you."

"Rollie, I'm sorry, I mean Detective Chambers he told me to tell you that if you didn't come to see me he would make an appointment with the first name on the departments approved list." Jessica paused and said, "Let me help you. If nothing else you'll get Captain Mallory off your back."

A grumbling Rollie said "All right you've got yourself a patient."

"Good. Would tomorrow at three fit your schedule?" Doctor Talbert asked. "My office is at 16...."

"I remember where your office is. See you at three," Rollie said and hung up. He got up and went to Pete Mallory's office.

"Got my first appointment with a therapist tomorrow at three," Rollie told him. "It's Doctor Talbert. She said you asked her to call me. Why?"

"Yeah, I did ask her to call," Mallory answered. "The why is because you weren't going to do what I told you to do. At least not until you forced me to suspend you. Now I don't have to suspend you."

The first meeting between Rollie and Doctor Talbert was not very productive, at least in Rollie's mind. He'd walked into the reception area at 2:45 and was told to take a seat by the receptionist. It almost 3:15 before Doctor Talbert opened her door and invited him into her office.

"I'm very sorry for being late" she said. "My last patient... well let's just say he was having a rough time of it today."

She motioned offering Rollie a seat in front of her desk. "Now we can concentrate on you."

Rollie had met Jessica Talbert once before while Susan was seeing her. He'd offered to come to one or all of the sessions if it would help his wife. Doctor Talbert turned down his offer and requested that he not question Susan about their talks. He agreed and never asked or talked about it unless Susan brought it up. True or not, he always felt that if he'd been in on some of the sessions Susan might not have committed suicide. Because of that feeling his attitude wasn't the best as far as the doctor was concerned.

"It's nice to see you again Rollie. May I call you Rollie?" Dr. Talbert asked.

"May I call you Jessica?" Rollie responded.

She looked at Rollie for several seconds and gave him a little smile. "If it will make you feel more at ease, please do."

Her response was not what Rollie expected. "Look Dr. Talbert, I don't know why I'm here. I'm fine; just overworked like the rest of the Detective squad. I want to be honest with you. The only reason I'm here is because Pete, Captain Mallory, ordered me to see a therapist."

"What happened to calling me Jessica?" She asked and then continued before he could answer. "I know you are here under duress but you are here so let's make good use of the time." Jessica gave Rollie a bigger smile.

"Captain Mallory, who sounds like he cares, is worried about you. After talking to him I believe he has some legitimate concerns." Jessica interrupted Rollie before he could speak. "As exampled by your dealing with Bradley Thomas."

"Thomas was high on Crystal Meth and attacked me," Rollie explained.

"The Captain told me that the shooting was deemed justified but in his mind you executed Thomas."

"Two shots didn't stop him so I kept shooting until he did stop. End of story," Rollie said defending his actions. "If he'd let me arrest him he would still be alive."

"It wasn't so much that you shot Thomas that bothers Mallory, it's the way you took leave and then hunted him down." Jessica consulted a legal pad that held some notes she'd made while talking to Captain Mallory. "He said that the whole department had searched for Thomas for three months and couldn't find him. But during a two week compassionate leave you tracked him down. Mallory said you must have gotten your information in a way that, well he said it wouldn't have been allowed by the courts."

Rollie gave Jessica an evil grin. "Prove it Doctor." He paused and said, "I'm done talking about Thomas. If you've got anything else then move on or I'll leave."

The two stared at each other for about 10 seconds and Jessica finally dropped her eyes. She wasn't giving in to Rollie but he was agitated and on the defensive. If she was going to help him, he had to feel that he'd won this confrontation.

For the rest of the hour they talked about general things. Things like why Rollie had become a police officer.

"Growing up I was taught that if I was ever lost or ever in trouble to find a cop to help me," Rollie said. "To me a policeman was a friend and someone that would help me. I wanted to make a difference in people's lives not just make money."

"That's an understandable reason Rollie," Jessica commented. "In my opinion a very good reason."

The young Detective saw Jessica glance at the clock on the wall. He smiled at Jessica and stood up. "Our time for this session is up Doctor. When do you want to meet again?"

She laughed. "I would like to see you at least twice a week. Today's Tuesday, could you come back Thursday at the same time? I promise not to keep you waiting next time."

"That works," Rollie replied. "See you Thursday." Before he got to the door Jessica gave him an order.

"Rollie, don't bring your pistol to the next session. Leave it at home, at work, or in your car please."

He looked embarrassed, nodded, and left the doctor's office.

Rollie was sitting at his desk the next morning when Pete Mallory called Rollie into his office. "I know you just started but how's your therapy going Rollie?"

"Doctor Talbert told me not to talk about our sessions Captain Mallory. You'll just have to wait for her report. If that's all Captain, I've got work to do."

Mallory nodded and motioned Rollie out of the office. "The boy's pissed at me for making him go to therapy," Mallory said to his office wall.

At his next session, he lifted his coat to show that he was unarmed. Jessica laughed and asked him to sit down. The next hour was more generalities. There was nothing with a lot of depth and nothing very intense. Jessica was building a foundation so that Rollie would trust her.

The third meeting was when the gloves came off.

"This week we need to discuss some real issues Rollie," Jessica said. "Let's talk about the reason, that after three months, you decided to look for Thomas by yourself."

Rollie sighed. This woman is like a pit bull, he thought with a little admiration. When she gets her teeth into something she won't let go.

"Do our meetings come under Doctor/Patient confidentiality?" Rollie asked. "Will anything I tell you get back to Pete or the Department?"

"Anything we talk about is privileged information Rollie," Jessica answered.

"But you can tell the Department that I'm not fit for duty, just not why. Is that it?"

Jessica stood, walked around her desk, and sat in the chair next to Rollie's. "Yes, I'll have to give them my opinion. And as you say I can't tell them why." She leaned forward in her chair. "Rollie if, and I say if, you have problems I hope we can correct or solve them before it comes to that. Okay?"

Rollie looked at Jessica. I can understand why the guy that was in here before me didn't want to leave, he thought. She's a damn fine looking woman. Whoa where did that come from? He asked silently.

Jessica stood, walked over to a couch, and sat down. Motioning to Rollie to join her she said, "Let's make this more like a talk instead of a doctor's visit. Come get comfortable."

He watched her walk to the couch. I was right; she is a good looking woman. Rollie's trained detective's eye and his trained girl watching eye cataloged her charms. She must be about 5' 9 and weighs 130 or so with an athletic build. She looks like a runner or a swimmer. Rollie knew from his scrutiny that she had long auburn hair and laser like blue eyes. Plus she's got freckles; he told himself surprised that he'd missed that before.

Rollie mentally shook himself as he joined her on the couch. Remember she's not a friend, he thought. Not exactly an enemy but not a friend...yet. The thought that she could possibly be more than his doctor surprised him too.

"Rollie," Jessica said and stopped to see his reaction. He smiled and nodded. "Why after three months did you go on what could be called a search and destroy mission? Was it because Susan died?"

"She didn't die," he responded heatedly. "Susan was killed by that piece of crap just as sure as if he'd put a gun to her head and pulled the trigger. The son of a bitch deserved what he got. I just wish I could've made him suffer the way Susan did." Rollie hesitated and added softly, "The way I did."

Rollie's mind went back over the three months after Susan was attacked. At first she didn't want anyone to touch her, not even him. Progressing to the chaste kisses on the cheek and then on the lips when he went to work. Finally she let him, even wanted him to hold her at night. Many nights he held his wife in his arms as she whimpered in her sleep.

He smiled to himself. Then she started getting better. Susan lost the haunted look and began to laugh and joke with him again. The kisses, while not overly passionate, became more like ones between a man and his wife, like ones between lovers. Rollie knew by Susan's actions that she was ready for them to make love and very soon. Then she got the results of her blood test. Rollie hung his head and let the tears fall.

"That's all right Rollie," Jessica told him. "Let it out so we can put it to rest."

He looked up unaware that he'd voiced his thoughts. Must be beginning to trust her, he said to himself. To Jessica he said, "I'll never be able to put it to rest. I'll remember how she died, killing the hope I had, we had, for our life together."

Rollie stood, walked to the water cooler and got a cup of water. "You asked why after three months I went after Thomas." Rollie repeated Jessica's question from the first session. "Because that's when Thomas finally killed her. He tried when he attacked her but it took three months for him to get the job done. That's why I went after him. That's why I did whatever I had to do to find him. And that's why I went into that hotel room alone, without back up."

Rollie stopped for a few seconds getting control of himself. "You said this was privileged so I'll tell you the truth. I went into that room praying Thomas would give me an excuse. But it didn't make any difference, he wasn't leaving, at least not alive. How do you like that for an eye for an eye scenario Jessica? I planned on killing Thomas; there was never a thought of taking him in."

"It's like you said Rollie, the Department will have to prove it," Jessica said and touched his arm. "But they'll have to do it without my help. The Department pays my fees but my loyalty is to you."

He smiled at her and patted her hand on his arm. I feel better, he thought.

Jessica quickly pulled her hand free. "What happened with the stolen car incident?"

"Still digging huh Doc? That whole situation was a fluke."

Rollie explained his thinking and what happened right up until the shooting. "The idiot came out of the car shooting at the police officers. Then he turned and fired at me." Rollie shook his head, not as sad or as intense as he'd been talking about Thomas but not happy either.

"My first two shots hit the door of the Camaro. The third shot hit him in the leg; he didn't even flinch. He just kept coming at me and shooting. It took seven more shots to put him down." Rollie looked over at Jessica. "The guy was so high on Crystal Meth; he didn't even know that he'd been shot."

Jessica got up and got herself a cup of water because she wanted Rollie to calm down a little. "Is that when you started carrying the Glock?" She asked. Rollie looked surprised. "I know my weapons. My father wanted a son and what he got was me. He taught me to hunt, fish, and enjoy the outdoors."

"Yeah after that shooting I bought the .45 Glock. I hope I don't have to use it but if I do the perps will stay down when they're hit."

Rollie and Jessica met twice a week for one month. Their meetings became less confrontational as Rollie started to trust Jessica. Rollie was at his desk on Tuesday morning, trying to think of an excuse to get out of that afternoon's session with Jessica. He was working on a missing persons case. Rollie and the other detectives knew that if you didn't find someone in the first 48 hours chances were you never would. Alive anyway.