The Penis Inspectors Ch. 01

I knew that I had been ordered to report to my local county health clinic for my male body-type statistical metrics exam. It either simply slipped my mind, or perhaps more reasonably, I chose to ignore the date of my exam, for what had become known by then as the Penis Inspection. You see, every male from the age of 18 through 60, under what was called the Male Statistical and Bodily Analysis Act, had to be examined by either qualified medical professionals, or as became obvious later, by those trained by qualified medical professionals. It all started about 5 or 6 years ago, when a woman by the name of Katrina Van Zanter, MD, had released a book detailing her research and findings in the field of Male Body Metrics, or the science of measuring men's bodies.

It seems that Van Zanter had determined, after extensive study on volunteers and the prisoners in the New York State penal system, that men's behaviors or even personalities could largely be predicted based on the dimensions of their body parts. We're talking chest width, overall height, hand measurements, feet measurements, throat, neck, waist, and then....yes... the male manhood. That's right. Katrina had decided that a great deal of guy's behavior seemed to be tied to the size of their private parts. And she was very specific. She used "manhood" as a term to indicate not the penis, but both the penis and testicles together.

In fact, her book ('The Science of MSBA") used these terms so much that eventually Dr. Van Zanter found herself actually using terms like member, at first, and then going all the way with "cock." And balls. Boy, did she use balls.

And that was only the first third of the book. I hadn't gotten through the tough science part. But as far as I knew, and all the news outlet's reported, the bigger the penis, the more at risk the male for "seriously immoral acts." Still, though her findings were collaborated, it raised quite a stir. That might not have lead to the new laws but for the recent rash of crimes, kidnappings, and two terrorist acts, as well as an actual rape in the White House. The rash of news coverage, and clamorings from female politicians, meant that soon we had the Male Statistical and Bodily Analysis Act.

Bottom line: At least one woman would have to see me...gulp...completely and absolutely bare-assed naked.

So probably, that's why I plum forgot about my inspection date. I didn't even bother to open up the follow up letter sent to me when I didn't come in. Then one day, I got a knock at my apartment door.

"Whooooo issss itttt," I humorously asked, unaware of my soon-to-be torment.

"It's the ladies from the local male metrics," came the reply. Gulp.

"Ah, hold on a second." I had just come home from work, expecting to rest and then go out on the town. Now, I was probably about to be reprimanded for not showing up for my penis inspection. I opened the door to find two VERY young Asian girls. It took me a couple of seconds to remember them as my neighbors from down the hall. A couple of cute Korean girls. Sisters, I think.

"Hi, Robert?"

They knew my name!

"Yes, that's me," I barely got that out of my now dry throat.

"Hello. You know we're your neighbors from down the hall, but we're also helping out the Male Metrics Board."

I replied: "Oh, yes, come in, please, both of you-have a seat."

They both flashed some smiles at me and then sat down. They were both Korean girls that had moved into the building about a year prior. I was always opening doors for them, helping with their groceries, and sneaking looks. I even checked out their mom. Somehow, I hadn't thought they ever caught me doing this. But I wasn't worried. I figured they were merely employees of the board here to do a preliminary interview or give me a new date for reporting in for my inspection. They were awfully cute. These were not skinny girls. They had cute round faces, and even rounder butts. The tall one was a nice 15 pounds over weight and the short one a bit more, but mostly in the ass where I liked it.

The tall one continued "I am Esther and this is Monica Lee. I guess you know we're sisters." After a pause she went on, "Well, as you know, we live in the neighborhood. The board hires assistants who are familiar with the area, so as to make sure that every male gets inspected."

"You mean examined?" I said, expressing some male bravado.

"NO, we mean inspected" came Monica's sharp reply. "We adhere strictly to Dr. Van Zanter's terminology and methods," was what she said.

I knew the words had been put right into her mouth. She even slowed her speech a little around those big words. Clearly, she had been told how to reply to such questions. She had been well trained, and obviously some woman had warned her about potential smart alecks like me.

"Yes, it's an inspection. That's why I'm here. Let's go over some details first and then we'll go from there," interjected Esther.

I was really surprised. What did she mean "That's why I'm here?" I cleared my throat, "Ughh, you're here to give me a new inspection date?"

Esther answered, "No we're here to inspect you."

That left me quite speechless. Before I could finish turning pale, I blurted out, "Aren't you a little young for this kind of work."

Esther responded: "Well, I'm 20 and my sister here turned 18 six months ago. We sometimes go three girls at a time, but today we just went out ourselves because we don't have enough girls back at the office. A lot of women are too scared to do this kind of thing. But I have a black belt in Tae Kwon Do and know how to take care of myself. And I'm not afraid of guy's bodies....We're pretty professional and you don't have anything to worry about. Now, let's get some disclosures out of the way so we can begin. I need you to acknowledge this for the record, ok?"

"Ok," I weakly replied.

Then she went on, as Monica switched on a tape recorder, and Esther began reading from a form on her clipboard, "Ok, please respond yes, or 'I acknowledge' to each of these statements or questions, here we go."

"Do you acknowledge that this inspection is for the purposes set fourth in the Male Statistical and Bodily Analysis Act?"

Yes, I responded.

She went on: "As you may not know, the male inspection requires verified and simultaneous measurements taken of numerous body parts, spine, neck, hands, feet, and sexual organs, and in relation to each other. Such measurements must be taken twice and verified. This means that one body part cannot be measured separately from others. Verification requires either two inspectors to sign off, with the secondary inspector sketching the body parts on a form provided by the Inspection Board, or if the subject should choose to have only one inspector present, photographs must be taken of said body parts. Robert, do you acknowledge these facts?"

"Yes," Came another weak answer from my pale mouth. To be honest, my head was spinning.

But Monica either couldn't hear my answer, or else was enjoying this, "I'm sorry, could you answer again, louder for the tape machine?"

"Yes," I replied. Continuing, "Furthermore, do you acknowledge the sharing of such data among scientists, researchers..."

"That's us" Monica shared.

"...and publishing results from this inspection. Other researchers and scientists also reserve the right to further inspect your body, pursuant to section three," Esther read. Then she looked at me, and said, "Any questions, before we begin?"

"Uhh, should I just take off my pants here?"

They both looked at each other and then Esther spoke: "No, silly didn't you here us? OK, this is how it's done. We can't have you taking your pants off because it's not professional and we're not here to just see one thing. We're here to see....everything you have. We can't measure just one part of you. Any measurement we make will have to be done while you are wearing no clothes. So please understand, if you're wearing socks even it could throw our measurements off. So you have to be nude for the inspection. You do realize the penalties and stuff if you refuse?"

Shocked as I was I answered that I understood. But then it got even worse.

"If you take your pants or clothes off in front of us, it would be like we're doing you a favor, or you're in control. WE'RE in control." And then a firm statement that made my dick shrink: "You will be NAKED for us. We will inspect you and see everything. You will not touch us, nor even talk unnecessarily during the inspection. Now, you will go into another room and take your clothes off and come out for us, or you can wear a towel or a robe until we're ready for the measurements. At this time, all I need to know is if you're too shy for both of us, I can take the measurements by myself. But then I'd have to take some pictures. Your choice."

Before I could answer, she let on, "Oh, we'll need measurements of your penis flaccid and erect...in other words, soft and hard."

After some thought, I decided I didn't want pictures of my privates out there, so I told them they could both "inspect" me, which made Monica smile a bit. I did have one request, "Ladies, couldn't we do this, in another room, just not the living room."

"NO" came the reply.

So I drew the blinders on the living room and went back to my room. I slowly took my clothes off, and put on my blue robe.

"We're ready out here," I could hear Monica say.

I came out barefoot and naked underneath my robe into my living room to the sound of Esther's voice.

"Ok, good. Let's start with your hand measurements. We're going to measure the length of each of your fingers on your writing hand. "

As she said this I extended my writing hand, left, for her inspection.

"Still haven't learned, have we? We can't take anything until your totally naked...OK... take off the robe."

I swallowed hard and began making very slow hand movements towards the very tight knot on my robe.

Then Esther said, "Look, if you're having trouble doing this..."

For a second I thought I was off the hook.

She continued, "...you can turn around and drop your robe, we can start with your neck and spine."

Suddenly Monica interrupted, "Esther, you know we already had the talk with him. [Turning to me] Look, Robert. There might well be a follow up exam, maybe even with a supervisor, who is also a woman. Like we explained before, WE ARE GOING TO SEE EVERYTHING YOU'VE GOT. So get NAKED."

At that, I turned around, took a deep breath, and dropped the last shield guarding my dignity. I very quickly felt the air on y shoulders, my back, my butt. My totally naked butt. I couldn't believe that my young neighbors were about to see me naked in the cold light of day. I was so fucking nervous that my dick shrank to the size of a little girl's thumb, and my balls were tight against me.

"Nice ass, Robert" was Monica's chosen remark.

Surprisingly, Esther said nothing. She just began taking the measurements on my neck. Then seconds later, I felt the heat of another hand behind my neck, and then "confirmed." Then they measured my whole backside, twice. I guessed at this point Esther was going first, and Monica was measuring second. Then they measured my feet sliding rulers next to each foot, with some sort of crisscrossing line that slide up the sides of each leg. As I closed my eyes, I heard no further comment from Monica, other than her saying "confirmed" every once in a while. Then suddenly nothing. I opened my eyes. I saw Esther right in front of me furiously scribbling down something on her clipboard, who knows what. Then with out taking her eyes off the clipboard, walked behind me.

Then I heard Monica order me, "Turn around Robert."

Heart racing, I gripped my now small nads in my hands. I looked forward, but not directly at them. They both laughed. Then Monica came up and made a chest measurement, then again while showing the measuring tape to Esther who scribbled on her clipboard. Then they both drew chairs from my dining room and placed them in the middle of the living room, in front of my TV.

Then Esther spoke up, "It's time we go through with this Robert, you have to learn to get used to this, and to get used to the Male Metrics Board."