The Right Woman?

"My name is Ambrosia Jane Styles. I was born in Cleveland, Ohio. I'm twenty-eight years old and have never been in love, until recently when I met the man of my dreams. Smart, good looking, funny, he is from money but that isn't why I fell in love with him. I always feel tingly when he's around. Now, because I messed up my life a few years ago, I'll never have my love again. I can't face him and hurt him anymore than I already have.

"When I was around five years old I was going to be a princess; at eight, a movie star; at ten, a dancer. I always thought I resembled Charlie Brown"s little red headed girlfriend in the peanuts comic strip, because of my red curly hair; my little brother Bobby who is two years younger than me said I looked like Little Orphan Annie. I pushed him down because Annie didn't have any eyes.

"I remember my little brother saying, 'Some day mom says I'll be bigger than you and you won't be able to push me down anymore.'

"'Why? So you can push me down?" I asked.

" 'No, so I will be big enough to protect you. You're my big sister and I like to play with you but I don't ever want to hurt you.'"

"God, I felt bad. Here he was only eight years old and he was worried about me even back then. I picked on him a lot less after that. Sure, we still had all our little squabbles like most siblings but we also loved each other.

"In high school I was always running to keep in shape. I was on the track and cross-country teams. I was far from being a wall flower. I knew I was attractive and that's why I had a lot of dates. While I was in high school I also joined the drama club. I thought about being a model or even an actress. I was really like most girls my age; I wanted to marry a rich guy who was tall, dark and handsome. I wanted it all like every teenage girl.

"I had sex for the first time at my prom. It wasn't at all like I expected. No stars or fireworks. I didn't even hear bells except for the church bells telling me I was late getting home.

"My sex life after the first time wasn't a big thing. If a guy treated me nice and we had a nice time I might give in or maybe just tease him. I really didn't put a lot of moral standing into sex. I guess since I could take it or leave it, it like didn't count.

"I was really into computers ever since I had my first Atari game and first Atari computer. My interest in computers got bigger and bigger. I think a part of me said that I could be a success in a so-called man's business - in a man's world - and drove me even harder.

"I received a scholarship and I decided to use it in Las Vegas. My scholarship covered my housing and my classes and books. My parents said they would send me two hundred dollars a month to help me along. They wished I would have picked a school closer to home but I wanted more than just the computer courses. Even though they were against it, they were always there for me. We were a close knit family.

"I roomed with six other girls. They were my only friends in Las Vegas. We watched each other's back and helped each other in our studies.

"I knew there was an etiquette class taught at this college. I wanted to know how to act like an influential person, to be able to walk, talk and act like the elites do. I wasn't snobby or anything like that. I really liked people of all ages and sizes and even wealth. I just figured it was a way of raising my standards. I still would treat all people equal but I didn't want the upper elite looking down on me. I wanted to be able to deal with the best of them.

"I started college and by day I learned computers and by night my etiquette classes. I spent all my time learning. Everything was going well for about six months. I got a call from my mother and she told me dad had a heart attack. He would be alright but would be on disability for at least six months, maybe even longer.

"I cried; my family meant everything to me. I called my dad at least twice a week to talk to him; I couldn't afford to fly home very often. He told me that he wouldn't be able to send me any extra money since he would only be getting disability.

" 'It's okay, Daddy, you just worry about getting better. I have plenty of free time here and thought about getting a part-time job. I'll be fine. Who knows? Maybe I'll be able to help you out.'

"I was scared. I didn't know what to do for extra money. I didn't have any plans for a part-time job. Hell, I was just a nineteen year old girl in a strange state. My etiquette teacher, Marsha, noticed my discomfort.

" 'Do you want to talk about it, Ambrosia?'

"I explained my financial situation to her and told her I would probably have to drop out of college and go back home. I just didn't have the finances to survive.

" 'Amby (that's what some of the people called me), I have a suggestion for you but I don't want to push you into anything you don't want to do.'

" 'What is it, Marsha? I'm about ready to sell my ass to make ends meet,' I said. I didn't mean it literally but it is what I said.

" 'It's kind of what I have in mind.'

" 'What? I'm no prostitute. I don't take drugs or really even drink. Hell, I don't even smoke. I don't need the money that bad.'

" 'Amby, just hear me out. It's not as bad as it sounds. I have a woman friend that runs an escort service. It's not a brothel or a whorehouse and she only has the best of clients and her girls are all young and smart. She doesn't allow drugs on her premises. If she thinks one of her girls is using, she will be tested and if found positive, she won't be working there anymore.'

" 'I'm not sure I understand. There is sex involved, isn't there?'

" 'Yes, there is sex, but only if you choose. Most of her clients are wealthy older men who come to town for a day or two. They like a good looking young lady on their arm. The woman has to be top drawer and know all of the etiquettes of the elite society. With what you have learned, you fit the part perfectly.'

" 'I don't know. Having sex with a lot of older men just doesn't seem right. It would make me seem cheap. I'm not a prude but if my family ever found out they would be devastated. How long would I have to do this for?'

" 'As long as you want. One time or a thousand times, it's up to you. There is no written contract. Try it a couple of times and see how it works out for you. You can make some really good money. Just being an escort for one night pays a minimum of five hundred dollars. If you choose to have sex with these gentlemen, you can make one to two thousand dollars a night.'

" 'You're kidding, aren't you? A thousand dollars to just have sex? I can hardly believe that.'

" 'Amby, these are rich older men and high rollers. They're not just some guy looking for a quick fuck from a hundred dollar whore. These men want gorgeous ladies at their side. Most of the time you will be eye candy so your gentleman will feel proud.'

"That's how it all started. Every weekend I was on the arm of an older man. I was more of an actress than anything. I could moan with the best of them. I was making in excess of three thousand dollars a week. I did this for about a year and a half. I had a lot of repeat business and I bet over a hundred marriage proposals.

"Have you heard enough, Janet? Ready to leave yet?"

"A.J., I'm here to help you and hear you out. I'm not judging you. In fact I have to say I respect you. Most women would try to take Jerrod to the cleaners. You on the other hand stopped seeing him and not for what he has done but for your own past. Please continue."

"Most men were older. There were a few men in their forties and maybe even a few in their thirties. I don't want to get into the sexual detail but there was lots of most everything most people do. At first it felt kind of weird but after awhile I really tried to get these old guys off. I actually felt sorry for them and did my best to help them ejaculate.

"I know I'm rambling on here so I'll tell you what happened and why it all ended. A young guy came in and asked for me. His name was Larry. He was the one that I saw at the party. It was a good six years ago and the thought of having a younger man after all the older men was appealing to me. I was his date for the evening and we had sex. It was good but he was nowhere in the class of Jerrod. I thought I might add that in. Anyway he gave me a thousand dollars to be with him that night.

"About two weeks later he came back and asked me for another date. He said it would be an all-nighter and paid me two thousand dollars. We stopped by his hotel room so he could get changed. He poured me a drink while he took a shower. I thought it was a little odd but he had dated me once before and had paid me up front this time.

"He drugged me. I felt myself getting very woozy and he laid me on the bed. I asked him to call me a doctor and he just laughed. He then opened his door and let in a woman. I could see she had red hair also. I think he called her Jenny but I'm not sure. I was about half out by then.

"They both stripped me and this woman started kissing me and I couldn't do anything about it. I've never been with a woman before and I honestly can't say it was all bad. She was sure a lot better than her boyfriend.

"She did all kinds of things to me. She did things I guess lesbians do. The worst was when she was finished, her boyfriend took over. She stuck a vibrator up my ass and he fucked me. He wasn't gentle or caring. He was hurting me. He wanted anal sex the last time he was with me and I refused him.

"This time they rolled me over and he took me anally. I passed out and as far as I know they used me the rest of the night. When I woke up in the morning there was a note that said I had till noon to get out of the room. They left me five hundred more dollars and the note.

"The note said, 'No use telling anyone about this. No-one will believe you. I wield a lot more power than you and will see that your life is destroyed if you tell anyone about this. Who knows, maybe we will see you again.'

"I was scared shitless. I was bleeding from my ass and had sucker bites all over my breasts. They wrote crude remarks all over my stomach area with lipstick. I was hurting and bruised; I got in the shower and cried. I knew then that I had hit rock bottom for me. I knew I had to stop and do whatever necessary to change my life style.

"I contacted the agency and told them I was quitting. They really didn't seem surprised. They wrote me a check for money still owed me and I looked around and saw some young girls being interviewed. I wanted to tell them to get the hell out of there before they ruined their life, but I knew they wouldn't listen, they never do.

"I had been sending my parents five hundred dollars a month. I could have sent them a lot more but I didn't want them to get suspicious. I had banked tens of thousands of dollars in several accounts. I needed to get out; to leave Las Vegas before it swallowed me up.

"I remember getting a letter from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. I called them and they had me fax them my records and accepted me into their computer program. I had transferred there in less than two weeks.

"I knew I hated the life I had been leading. The money was great but I had lost my self-respect and I couldn't put a price on that. I called my parents and told them of my transfer. I told them when I got home that I had enough money left from my job to purchase a car and I could come home every weekend if I wanted to. MIT was a lot closer to home.

"I hated lying to my parents about how I got the money, but there is no way I ever wanted them to know the truth about their daughter. I told them I worked on computers in my spare time and that's where I picked up the extra money. Mom told me when dad wasn't working that the money I sent them helped them save their house. I lied to them one more time.

" 'Mom, you are going to hate me for doing this but while I was in Las Vegas, I gambled.'

" 'Janey (now here's another name - my family always called me Janey), how could you waste your money like that?'

" 'Mom, listen to me. I only went to the casino one time and I had beginner's luck. I won over twenty-five thousand dollars.'

"I had to tell them something. Mom told me that they needed ten thousand to pay off their mortgage. I gave it to them and my dad cried.

" 'It's alright, Dad. You took care of me all these years and now that you need help I'm here to help you. I love you, Dad.' My father kept crying as I hugged him.

"Mom was looking at me strangely. 'Okay, Mom, what is it? You have this 'I need to tell you something' look on your face.'

" 'It's Bobby; he wanted to go to the area college but we can't afford to send him.'

"My little brother, who was about a foot taller than me, had just walked in.

" 'Hi, Janey, what's new? Mom said you transferred to MIT and we can see you more often.'

" 'She's right, and what about you, little brother? What are your plans since you're out of school now?'

" 'I guess I will look for a job. I wanted to go to the local college and become a physical therapist but just don't have the money. Mom and Dad are pretty strapped and I don't have anything. I figure if I can find some work and save some money, I might be able to go next year.'

" 'Bobby, are you really serious about being a Physical Therapist?'

" 'God, yes, Janey, it would be so neat. I could help at the schools and the hospitals are always looking for them. It pays pretty decently and I could have a degree in two years. I got all A's and B's in high school so I got accepted. Just don't have the finances. Six thousand dollars isn't that easy to find.'

" 'Little Brother, I'll give you the money.'

" 'You? Janey, where did get that kind of money?'

" 'She won it in Las Vegas,' replied Mom.

"I couldn't tell whether he believed Mom or not but he had a tear in his eye when he came over and hugged me.

" 'I'll always be there for you, Janey. If you ever need me for anything, just call and I promise you I'll be there. You're the best sister any brother could ever have. I love you, Sis.'

" 'I love you too, Bobby.'

"I started at MIT and Bobby started at the local college. MIT was really surprised with my knowledge of computers. I was near or at the top of my class. I spent all my time learning. I met Adrianna and Matt in my classes. They were great in computers also. Between the three of us there was nothing we couldn't do when it came to computers. Hardware, software, it didn't make any difference. That's when the three of us made a pact that we would go into business together,

"After graduation we started AJ Computer Updating. In case you are wondering why my initials are in the name of the company it's because I fronted all the money. Adrianna and Matt didn't have any finances. We all own a one-third share of the business but they do owe me on their part of the initial investment. They give me regular payments after every job. We are doing exceptionally good in the business.

"Is that the whole story, A.J.?"

"Yes. You see when I first met Jerrod after hearing about his escapades through life I had no idea that I would fall for him. I didn't see any reason to tell him anything about my personal past. First of all no-one knew and second I didn't know our relationship would be what it is. After we were intimate I wanted to tell him before things went any further. That's when he told me he didn't want to know about my past.

"I was glad because I felt if I told him, I would lose him. Then as I was sitting on cloud nine, the devil hit me right in the face. That damned bastard who raped me was there talking to the man I loved. When I saw the look on Jerrod's face my heart sank. I did what I do best and I ran, I ran from that place as fast as my feet would carry me.

"I went to my apartment and got a few things and left to come back here to Cleveland where I feel safe. As you know I called Adrianna in to finish the job. We only had a couple of weeks work left."

"A.J., I can't say what you did was right, but you were a young girl growing up and making your own decisions. We don't always make the right one but we do have to live with the results of our actions. Jerrod needs some closure and only you can give him that, good or bad. Besides, his early life wasn't on the highest moral plain."

"I know that, Janet, but Jerrod was up-front with his affairs. Mine was more of the hidden variety. I never let him know. It makes a world of difference."

"A.J., let me talk to him and you must give him a chance to make a choice."

"Okay, next weekend is Adrianna's wedding. Give him this invitation and we'll see what he does. I love him, Janet, but I can't go through life with him knowing he doesn't trust me and throwing my past in my face. Since we met he has always been on my mind and my only love."

Chapter 3 The Conclusion

You'll recall, at the company party, Larry caught my attention.

"Jerrod, long time no see. How's it going? Rumor has it you have a new squeeze. I thought I would come by and check her out. Jenny's home with the kids. We have two rug rats now. So where's this new woman I've heard so much about?" asked Larry.

He was scanning the room checking out all the women when he spotted A.J.

"Oh, my God, I think I see Ambrosia. My God, Jerrod, wait till I tell you about her. I wonder who she's with? I haven't seen her in a good six or seven years but it must be her. She has to be the sexiest redhead alive. The last time I saw her was in Las Vegas, about six years ago."

I couldn't believe what I just heard. Larry knew A.J.? He called her by her name. There aren't too many Ambrosia's in the world. My God, what does he know about her?"

A.J. was smiling and laughing with my parents. She turned and walked toward me and, when she saw Larry, her mouth flew open. She was in tears by the time she reached me. All she said was, "I'm so sorry" and ran from the party.

I didn't know what to think. I ran after her but she got into a cab and left. I went back into the party to find out what the hell happened.

A few people asked me what was wrong with A.J.? I just told them she took sick and had to leave. Mom and Dad knew better and just kind of stared at me as if I did something wrong. What was I to tell them?

Larry was standing there with a total look of wonderment on his face. I told him to follow me into a side room. I had to know what the hell was going on with A.J. Of late she was my life and now she's gone.

"Where the hell do you know A.J. from? You better not lie to me or you'll regret it."

"Easy, Jerrod, I didn't know she was your woman. All I knew is that you were dating a beautiful woman. I wouldn't have said anything if I knew she was with you."

"Cut the crap, Larry. How do you know her, and I want the truth?"

"First Jerrod, this was years ago. You probably didn't even know her then. It was about the same time you broke it off with Jenny. We were all dating everyone way back then."

"Come on Larry, quit stalling. When and how did you meet her?" I asked.

"I met her in Las Vegas. As I said earlier it was six or seven years ago. I went there to gamble and came out way ahead. I was really having a good night. I decided I wanted the best companionship that money could buy. I didn't want a street whore; I wanted the cream of the crop. I didn't care what it cost since I won this money.

"One of the dealers told me that there was an escort service that dealt with some really nice girls. They were all young and beautiful and they weren't cheap but well worth the price. I went there and you know how you and I are partial to redheads. It's when I saw this stunning red headed girl; it was Ambrosia. When I saw her I knew she was the one I wanted so we agreed on a price and she was my date for the evening."