The Things You Make Me Feel Ch. 05

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Mind vs Heart, Fiancé vs Brother: Ellie's choice.
16.6k words
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Part 5 of the 11 part series

Updated 06/08/2023
Created 12/26/2016
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blackmatter
blackmatter
1,314 Followers

Friday afternoon, just twenty hours from the moment he had snuck out of Ellie's room, Oliver was on his way home from work. With Ellie's help, he'd managed to slink out of the house stealthily and undetected. Returning inside, however, was a whole different story. His daughter had wanted to string him up from the highest tree in town for deserting her. It had taken quite a while until she managed to calm down, which only served as proof that she wasn't making any groundbreaking progress with her fears; then again, he did disappear without a trace last night, leaving his phone behind him in his room, so she couldn't even get hold of him.

Once he'd put out one fire, a second started. His brother Dave had shown quite the interest in his whereabouts and in the motivation that had led him to vanish in such careless manner that didn't agree with his otherwise strong sense of responsibility. He'd made up a fib about how troubled he had been because of work, and that he'd taken a twenty-minute stroll to clear his head. He didn't think to carry his phone with him since Michela was asleep, and he knew he wasn't going to be long. Both his brother and daughter had seemed sufficiently satisfied with his explanation, and everyone retired to bed soon after.

Oliver couldn't sleep, though, for hours. The truth of his disappearance was the reason for that. He was too excited and joyful to allow himself to sink into meaningless dreams. Why go to sleep when reality was the best dream he could have ever hoped to have, for that night he had conquered the unobtainable -- his sister. Images of Ellie and him making love the way love-making was meant to be kept incessantly flashing in his mind. Her scent, her touch, and her marvelous nudity were deceptively vivid that he could have been mistaken to think he was indeed making love to her all through the night; alas, if only they weren't interrupted...

He hadn't seen his sister this morning when he took off for work, nor had he made any attempt to contact her throughout the day, and neither had she. Oliver hadn't contacted Ellie since he wanted her to make the first move. His objectives and wants were transparent and well-known to them both: he wanted to be with her and was willing to do anything to make it happen. Ellie's stance was vaguer. He knew she loved him, that she wanted to be with him; even so, last night she'd warned she couldn't make any promises; hence, the reason why Oliver was waiting for her to contact him. The puzzle that was his sister remained unsolved though.

"Suppose she decided she wanted to be with me. Wouldn't she tell me that? And at the earliest opportunity? Especially after last night?" he mused minutes from his parents', and now beginning to fear it was a bad omen, her radio silence. "Though the same could also be argued regarding the other possibility," he tried lifting his spirits, in vain. "That means that she's, most likely, still undecided. Not ideal, a little disappointing even, though at least not fatal. At least I'm still in the picture."

Walking down the street, the cool air helped him stay relaxed since the more he dwelled on it the less he liked his chances, for no matter how he sliced it, there was a 66.6666% chance that he was not winning here.

"God, I know it's ironic, but please help me out here. I love her so much, and I know that you approve of love." He could see the house from a distance, and his heart started drumming as he was wondering if his sister was there. "Regarding that pesky incest thing, if you're truly serious about it, I promise to make amends in the next life or... sometime. Just... I need her."

As he approached the house, he could see Ellie's Mini Cooper in the driveway. Ellie loved her car, but she would rarely drive it to their folks'. She loved the walk, as she'd told Oliver once, and though clearly not in need of any sort of diet, she believed that one could never be too thin. Ellie's form had always been very important to her. If she had any phobia of her own, it would have to be fear of fat, Oliver thought and instantly smiled, recalling their late-night talks years ago, how she'd given him such a hard time in his chunky days. He then remembered that she'd left her car yesterday for Jason to use. Her car was clearly not there last night when he was in his black opp, stealthy mode, waiting outside the house in the cold for the right moment to return from his stroll.

"Well, maybe she stopped after work at her place to get it," he mused, trying to quickly do the math in his head. "It's a good sign, actually. No! An excellent sign. Because if she's here, it means that she and that fuck are practically through! Yes! Oliver for the win! I knew I liked my chances..." He took a moment to bask in his victory. "Mom's car is here. Dad's isn't. Though he doesn't own a car, Dave is always here... alright. It's time to go in." He stood outside the door, heart racing, palms sweaty, and didn't make a move. "Shit! Why am I so fucking nervous?" He filled his lungs with big drafts of the chilly air and exhaled acutely, going over all the signs to make sure he indeed prevailed.

*

"Piccola mia, I'm home. Come give me a kiss."

He hung his coat and walked to the living room. No one was there.

"Principessa, dove sei?" (Princess, where are you?).

She wasn't in the kitchen, either.

"Vita mia!" he called as he mounted the stairs. She wasn't there, but neither was his mother.

He tried working out where they could be. Alice had been driving Michela to and from kindergarten since her first day; it was just next to her work. So if his mother wasn't home, his daughter wasn't going to be, either.

"But her car is here," he pondered.

He looked for Dave and Ellie yet couldn't find either.

"Well, my birthday is next week... maybe it's an early surprise party?" He frowned in thought. "No, that can't be right. Dad's car isn't here, and Jack's car isn't here, and why would anyone throw anyone an early birthday surprise party? What a stupid idea..."

He plugged his phone into the charger in his room as the battery was nearly depleted. He then took off his jacket and returned downstairs. Deciding to grab a bite before calling his mom, he started for the kitchen only to stop in his tracks. He could have sworn he heard his sister's voice. It was feeble, but strong enough for him to pick up on.

"Is she here?" He tried amplifying his hearing range, tuning it to the angelic frequencies his sister would talk on. "My god, if she's here..."

He couldn't hear a thing.

He took a couple more steps before stopping again. He definitely heard Ellie this time; he wasn't hallucinating it. He trod to the patio door, and though he couldn't see a thing as the glass was misty from the heating, it was clear that she was out there. He opened the door and stepped outside. He was quite cold just in his jacket-less suit and tie. He took a few more steps, following her faint voice, until he eventually came to a halt.

Oliver was quite young, just a week shy from turning 23, but in his short life he had experienced meaningful events; events that people a few years older would normally get to experience: marriage, the birth of a child... some events in his life were not as joyous, however; in fact, were quite painful, honestly, but standing out in the cold while gazing at his sister, he couldn't think of a moment more hurtful than this.

Ellie was sitting in the bubbling hot water of the Jacuzzi in nothing but her slutty white bikini, and beside her, her topless fiancé. A bottle of what Oliver thought to be one of his father's most exclusive red wines was resting beside them alongside a pair of half-full wine glasses. Ellie seemed quite emotional to him, and he noted a few tears on her cheek; the same cheek that was cupped rather intimately by the man he hated the most.

This day turned out to be very different than what Oliver had envisioned. This was not how he thought it would end. He could feel his eyes welling as his heart was being ground into powder. He exhaled forcefully to repel his tears, too broken to even look away from that painful scene. His body quivered, not from the cold though, but from that gash in his chest. Indeed... this day turned out to be very different.

He could see Jason whispering softly in his sister's ear while petting her delicate shoulder, and he was clearly doing something right, Oliver felt, since Ellie's weeping exacerbated the more he kept going. At this moment, serving as nothing but an unwelcome extra on this romantic set, Oliver didn't even want to live anymore. In less than 24 hours from making love to the woman of his dreams, the woman he most likely loved more than any other woman in his life, she ripped his heart out of his chest and stomped on it over and over, and when they were about to kiss, Oliver knew it was time to take his leave.

As he was about to, sufficiently destroyed, his presence became known to the couple in the Jacuzzi when Ellie glanced at the house. The phony look of dread on his sister's face couldn't have hurt more, as if she'd actually feared he would see it; then again, why would he? It wasn't that he lived there or anything...

"Can you give us some privacy? We're in the middle of something here in case you haven't noticed."

It was comforting, Jason's hostility, Oliver admitted. At least one of them wasn't pretending.

He heaved a sigh, nodding at his executioner, and whirled around to the house.

"Oliver!" Ellie cried out while clambering out of the Jacuzzi, sounding genuinely terrified.

He ignored her and went inside.

"OLIVER!!"

*

Climbing up the stairs, the full magnitude of what he had witnessed hit him. If there was any living tissue in his heart that had managed to survive the blast while desperately clinging to life, the aftershock finished it off. It surprised him, how painful that spectacle really was. After burying Bianca, their week-old baby girl weeping in his arms, he'd had a lot of growing up to do, and quickly. He'd had to toughen up, if only for Michela, and although it had taken some time and significant work, he'd come on top.

The Oliver of old had died the same night his wife had however. It was a new Oliver who'd emerged from his ashes; a better Oliver, a stronger Oliver. This Oliver had improved on the old version in every way. This Oliver was everything the old one wasn't, for better or worse. Aside from his daughter, all other females were forbidden from entering his heart without proper supervision, and it had worked out brilliantly.

Ellie had changed that though. Not knowingly, or even deliberately, but she'd somehow managed to slink in, sidestepping his booby-traps, careful not to trigger his alarms. She knew his every cipher, code, and password, or perhaps it was nothing but a string of lucky guesses; either way, she didn't stop until reaching his core and clasping his heart in her hands. By the time he'd noticed, he was a goner.

He plunked himself down onto his bed and buried his head between his legs, his heart painfully convulsing. He ruffled his hair, unable to wrap his head around it. "How did I not see it coming? God, it hurts..."

She'd already pulled a similar stunt weeks ago at the park, giving him a taste of the heartbreak he was in for, he recalled. Then why did he feel it was different this time? What actually made him so delusional to believe that this was going to end any differently? Last night was the answer of course, he knew. Although no verbal promises were made, emotional ones were abundant; then again, experience is the teacher of fools, he reminded himself harshly, and this was his lesson: never trust a woman. Whether they would lie to you or die on you, the result is the same: you're left to pick up the pieces of your broken heart in your lonesome.

Fucking... I'M SO FUCKING STUPID!!!!!!

Oliver spent another minute wallowing in his pain. He noted that this revolting feeling was very much like being on a roller coaster. His heart seemed to have plummeted in such speed that triggered the analogy in his head. He had a strong feeling, though, that this nightmarish ride would last longer, infinitely longer.

"I need my baby girl, my precious angel." He sighed, looking at the floor to stave off his tears. "She's the only good thing in my life. I don't need anyone but her. I will never need anyone but her. I'm done with this. I'm done with—"

"Oliver, I know you're upset, but—"

"Please leave," he croaked and pulled his head from between his knees with a tired sigh.

Ellie had snuck into his room, similarly to how she had into his heart. Hands clasping nervously, she stood in his doorway in a closed robe that undoubtedly concealed her whorish bikini.

"No," she said. "You need to let me ex—"

"It's okay. No... explanation is needed. Now please leave. Leave me alone."

"No! I'm not gonna leave until you hear me out!"

He shook his head at her as tears revisited his eyes.

Oliver was not being himself at the moment. His passionate, hot-blooded self had taken a leave of absence. He couldn't have been any more weak and spent. He simply had nothing in him anymore. His sister had taken him for everything the moment he sighted her with her fiancé in the Jacuzzi.

"I know how it—what are you doing? I'm trying to explain, and you're turning your back to me?!"

"I need..." He sighed as he searched through his contacts on his phone. "I can't do this now; I really can't. I um... what was... yeah, to... to find Michela."

The frightening way her brother was behaving had really put the fear in Ellie. He was clearly not himself, speaking in a voice that struggled to go over a whisper, sighing between his words... it crushed her. She never suffered this bad when her boyfriends had hurt her, let alone when she hurt them.

"Oliver," she murmured, tears snarling up her throat, "you have to let me explain, I'm begging you..."

"I accidentally dialed... a different number," he whispered and tried laughing, but it came out muted and creepy. A tenacious tear broke away from his left eye.

"Oh my god," Ellie sobbed in a whisper, shaking her head at his appearance. He was destroying her. "Baby, it's not—"

"Don't call me that," he muttered to his phone, more tears coming down his cheeks.

"But you're not letting me explain..."

"There's nothing to explain." He focused back on his phone, determined to get a grip. "They say a picture's worth a thousand words, and they really know what they're talking about." He wiped his tears in his sleeve. "Even an imbecile like me can... I um... I need to find Michela. She's not... I don't know where she is."

It was unbearable for Ellie. His tears and his dull, confused whispers hit her more fatally than any scream he could have ever let out. It hurt her in places she didn't know exist. She didn't even know if he was aware how frightening he sounded, but she did know one thing for certain: something broke inside him, and she did that.

"Oliver, if you just let me—"

"Ellie, please leave. I'm calling Mom, and you're—"

"Michela isn't here, Oliver!" she said in a sob. "And she won't be here until Sunday..."

Oliver looked up from his phone at his sister, befuddled. It was the first time he looked at her since she had entered his room. She was a wreck. He couldn't comprehend where she got the audacity to shed her false tears after what she had done to him; even so, his daughter took precedence.

"What do you mean she's not going to be here until Sunday?" he said, sounding like himself for the first time.

"I mean..."

"Ellie! Where, is, my, daughter?!"

"She's... she's on... Dad and Mom took her to a resort..."

"They what?!" he exclaimed, anger surging up within him. "Please tell me you're joking because you wouldn't want me to call Mom now."

"No, don't get mad at her. It was my idea."

He shrugged, a perplexed frown on his face. "Now I know there's a sensible explanation to this, but I'm struggling to deduce it myself, so... if you'd be so kind to tell me why did you send my daughter to a resort and why no one has bothered to let me know or... to ask me what the fuck do I think about it, then maybe, just maybe, I won't make that call. At least not when I'm angry."

"Okay." She wiped off her tears and breathed deeply. "I'll explain."

"Please do."

"Mom called me today to ask how I was doing... and she mentioned that she, Dad, and Dave were going away for the weekend to a resort with the Williamson's, so I told her..."

Oliver was furious. The sight of his still-much-shaken sister did nothing to ease his aggression; if anything, he was just getting madder. "If you're pausing for the effect, then don't. I assure you -- I'm already hooked."

"I told her... that she should take Michela with her, so you'd have a few days of rest. I... I told her that I'd be taking you out, showing you a good time... so you could take a break from..."

To say Oliver was mystified would be an understatement. "Why would you do that? Huh? Why the fuck would you do that, Ellie?! Why would you—"

"Because I wanted you this weekend for myself!"

Ellie resumed weeping while her clueless brother was hectically going over today's events, trying to think if he missed some key moment that might help solve this enigma.

"Um... I'm sorry, what?"

"I wanted for us... to have a few days to ourselves, with no interruptions, so we could... pick up from where we stopped last night, and I... didn't feel like sharing you..."

Now Oliver was certain something was wrong with him. There was no way he heard her saying that. He was clearly going through a nervous breakdown, and his mind was playing tricks on him. The symptoms were all there.

Ellie wiped her tears in the sleeve of her robe and patted into the room. Up till now, she was too afraid to. "They say a picture's worth a thousand words, but this picture, the picture that you saw, Oliver... is worth shit! Less than shit... it's worthless."

"I wouldn't say that," he hissed. "For a poorly-lit picture, it was very detailed and... telling."

"I understand that it couldn't look good, but—"

"Look good? No, it looked great, Ellie! It really did. The winter setting; you half-naked in the hot tub; the wine; oh, and uh... your topless fiancé!"

"Oliver, I assure you it was anything but romantic."

"Yeah, obviously! Because when you were kissing in—"

"We weren't kissing!"

"Stop fucking lying! He was leaning in—"

"And I turned away! I gave him my cheek! And that's when I saw you standing there! There was nothing going on in spite of how it might've looked."

"No. I... I know what I saw." He shook his head at her, his eyes glistening with tears. "How could you do this to me, Ellie..."

"Oliver, the Jacuzzi, the wine, the"—she opened her robe in anger and put her barely-clothed body on display—"this?! It's not for him! It's for you!" She pulled her blond hair back, her blue eyes again trickling tears. "Last night... it meant the world to me! Do you think I make a habit of crying during sex?!"

She patted closer to him when she noticed his gaze softening. "I was so excited about us after... I kept hoping you would sneak back into my room that I could barely sleep! I didn't even go to work today because I was so tired and preoccupied. I couldn't wait to see you again, baby... and when the folks said they were going away, all I could think of was how to get you alone this weekend. They didn't tell you they were taking Michela because I asked them not to... I wanted to surprise you."

"You did?"

She nodded, tearfully smiling. "So I put on this bikini because I remembered how insane I was making you when wearing it." They both chuckled at the memory. "I... handpicked for us one of Dad's best reds, and I slipped into the Jacuzzi just when you were about to get back from work. The picture that you saw was the exact picture I was going for, minus Jason. He showed up out of the blue, and when he saw me in the Jacuzzi, he just... jumped in! I couldn't stop him!"

blackmatter
blackmatter
1,314 Followers