Tina's Secret

Note: For those of you who have followed my work, I apologize for my long absence. I've been focusing on other genres lately and that has taken up much of my writing time. Now I am ready to return to my true love, transsexuals. I hope you will find it worth the wait. I also want to mention that this is my first foray into watersports. If you guys like it or don't like it, please let me know.

Synopsis: In this follow-up to the "Rebecca's Secret" series, Rebecca's boyfriend Jordan finds himself back at school for his junior year of college with his transsexual girlfriend living on the other side of the country. He tries to find another girl, in accordance with their open relationship agreement, but finds that "normal" girls just don't seem as satisfying anymore As the loneliness becomes unbearable, Jordan meets Tina, a pretty blonde hippie chick who has a big surprise of her own to share.

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Introduction

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My name is Jordan Conrad. Those of you who read my "Rebecca's Secret" series probably remember me. If you've never read them, I guess I should give you a quick summary, so you're not in the dark about what's been going on in the past few months of my life. Bear with me during the slow parts. I promise this is all going to be a lot more interesting as you keep reading.

Last summer, I came home after finishing the second semester of my sophomore year at the University of Connecticut. Once I was home, I fell into my old routines, hanging out with the usual crowd who were also home for the summer from their various schools. Through a friend, I "met" a girl named Rebecca, and there was an instant attraction between us. I say "met" because I did know her vaguely in high school, but we had never been close friends. Within days, she and I were a couple, and I fell in love with her before I even knew it.

Later that same summer, Rebecca and I went to Vermont with a group of friends to stay in a timeshare condo owned by my friend's parents. Since we were a couple, we got a bedroom all to ourselves, one with a king-sized bed and its own bathroom. You can imagine what was going through my head when I thought of the two of us together, alone at night with no one to disturb us. I don't want to come off like a horn dog or anything, but young men have needs. I was also a virgin at the time, as was Rebecca, and I was eager to lose my virginity to a girl who meant so much to me.

I could never have predicted the surprise that was in store for me.

As I had hoped, things got hot and heavy between us, almost as soon as we were in bed. I knew this was the moment. But then something went wrong. Rebecca became upset and afraid that I wouldn't love her anymore if we had sex. That wasn't true, of course, but I still wanted to do it REALLY badly. That's when she revealed the biggest shocker of my life: Rebecca had a penis. She had been born a boy and had chosen, before I ever knew her, to become a girl as she believed she was meant to be. For many years, she had been living as a girl, though hidden in her panties was a six inch penis and a pair of testicles.

At first, I didn't know how to react, until I came to the slow realization that I didn't care. I loved her and the fact that she didn't have a vagina did nothing to change that. In fact, as our love-making began, I discovered that a penis could actually be a lot more fun than I had ever imagined a vagina would be. I mean, with a vagina, you can lick it or you can put your penis into it. Her butt was a more than adequate substitute for that and, in addition, her penis could be licked, sucked, stroked, jerked, or put my own ass. Not to mention the fact that a penis gives you a little reward at the end. I mean, pussies are OK but it's nice to have something solid and warm to hold in your hand. But I digress. If you want to read about our first night, check out "Rebecca's Secret".

Sadly, that perfect, transcendant summer had to come to an end. Rebecca had to go back to California for school while I remained relatively close to home - meaning, the other side of the country. We talked about our relationship for a long time and decided the best solution was to put it on hold while we were apart. We could date other people as long as we remained true to one another in our hearts. That was obvious, though. It didn't really need to be said. I could never love anyone but her and I knew she felt the same way. So, after a night of sex that made our first time seem like a cuddling contest, we said goodbye.

When I got back to school, I had no interest in finding another girl. I was still too hung up on Rebecca. But, as the weeks went by, I began to think more seriously about finding someone. Rebecca didn't want me to be alone all year and, to be perfectly honest, I didn't want to be alone either. I began to date other girls, some only once or twice, some more seriously. No one really made me feel the way Rebecca did, though. There was no spark between us.

That wasn't the only problem. I had come to discover that, once you go tranny, you never go back. The sex was decent, when I could get it, but it simply didn't compare to the kind of experience I had with Rebecca. A pussy simply wasn't enough anymore. I needed a girl with balls, if you know what I mean.

On Halloween night, I found the girl I was looking for, right under my nose.

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Tina and me

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On a whim, I decided to take a Creative Writing course during the Fall semester. I had enjoyed writing "Rebecca's Secret" and I seemed to have some talent for the written word, plus I needed the English credit, so I figured it was a good idea. The course was actually fairly popular so I was lucky to get in. My first day of class, I walked into the door of a packed classroom and quickly scanned for the only free desk, which was in the back. I moved towards it and sat down. To my right was a goth-looking dude dressed in black.

To my left was a sinewey blonde girl wearing a long, flower-print skirt and a Rainbow Brite t-shirt that wasn't faded enough to actually be from the 1980's, but which I assumed was reprinted as retro fashion. She also wore open-toed sandals on her feet, a hemp necklace, and several hemp bracelets. She was your typical modern hippie, not the kind of person I had too much in common with, but she had an open, friendly face and luminous blue eyes.

"Hi," I said, smiling to her.

"Hey," she replied, blushing, and then turning away. She was shy, I guess.

"I'm Jordan," I told her.

"I'm Tina."

"Are you an English major?" I asked her.

"Yeah," she said, "but this isn't a required course."

"I need the English credit," I explained, "but I like to write short stories so I figured it was a good fit."

"Cool," she said, finally meeting my eyes.

Things went on like that between Tina and me over the next few weeks. Every day, I would walk into the classroom to find Tina already sitting at her usual desk. I would smile at her, she would smile back, and we would exchange idle pleasantries until the professor arrived. Sometimes we would talk after class while she waited for the bus, but not every time.

The process was beginning to frustrate me. I really liked her. Despite the fact that she was so shy, I was able to learn a few things about her. She was 18, a freshman, and she was from New Hampshire where she lived with her parents, two brothers, and one sister. She also also very bright, funny when she worked up the courage to make a joke, and an excellent writer. Her specialty was poetry. Her stuff was amazing, much better than mine. She hated to read in front of the class but, when she did, everyone was blown away. Especially me.

Meanwhile, my talent for writing short fiction was growing, and the professor was impressed. Tina always gave me positive feedback on my writing and encouraged me whenever she could. There wasn't much positive feedback to give on my poetry, though. I stank. Tina, on the other hand, had the opposite problem. She was great with language and images, but had trouble with things like plot and characterization. On Friday, a week before Halloween, our professor assigned everyone in the class to bring one poem and one story to class the following Friday, then dismissed us.

"Hey Tina," I said, catching up to her as she walked towards the bus.

"Hey," she said. "What's up?"

"I was thinking and I wanted to ask you something."

"OK?"

"Do you want to come over to my place on Thursday and read each other's stuff? I've been struggling with my poems and I was hoping maybe you could give me some pointers. I could try to give you some pointers too."

"Uh, yeah, that sounds alright."

"Awesome. We'll work out the details later. I think that's your bus coming."

"Oh yeah. Umm, see ya."

"Bye."

The next Thursday, as we had planned, Tina came over at 7:00 PM with her new poem and her new story. My roommate was gone so we had the place to ourselves to read and talk about our work. It was an unseasonably warm night so Tina had showed up in a pair of cut-off jean shorts and a peach-colored tanktop which showed off her lithe body, pleasantly round butt, and c-cup breasts. I actually found it a little hard to concentrate since every time she leaned over, I got a nice view of her cleavage.

She read my poem and I read hers. Then she read my story and I read hers. The subject matter was shocking, but something I knew a lot about. It was about a girl whose dating a boy but feels unable to express her desire for him because she knows that they can't have sex without her revealing her darkest secret - she's a pre-op transsexual.

The gears in my mind started to turn and I began to look at Tina in a new way. Sure it was possible that the story was truly just a piece of fiction or perhaps even intended as symbolic metaphor. That's probably what she expected me to think. But was it possible that her story was based on a true experience? Was it possible that Tina had her own secret as well? I looked at her closely. She had a feminine face and body, but she was tall for a girl, nearly six feet. Not only that, the way she wrote about the transsexual lifestyle was so accurate, even down to the subtleties of emotion, which I had picked up on from Rebecca.

I knew there was only one way to proceed. I would tell her the truth about myself and see if she responded in kind. I wasn't ashamed of Rebecca, but it wasn't something I wanted to broadcast to the world, either. Tina, however, I felt I could trust.

"This is a very realistic story," I told her. "You really captured what it's like to be a transsexual."

"I did?" she asked hesistantly.

"Yeah," I told her. "If I tell you a secret, will you keep it?"

"Of course."

"You know my girlfriend Rebecca that I've mentioned to you a few times?"

"Yeah . . ."

"She's a transsexual. She was born male but now lives as a woman."

"Is she a post-op?"

"No. Pre-op. She's still got all her parts."

"Have you two . . . had sex?"

"Many times," I said, grinning a little despite myself. "I didn't know she was a transsexual when we started dating. She only told me later. I was a little weirded out at first, but it didn't last long. The way I figured - just because she had been born a man didn't mean she was any less of a woman now. At first, I thought the whole penis thing would be too much, but I actually liked . . . I'm probably getting too graphic."

"That's OK," she said with a laugh. "Thank you for trusting me. I won't tell anyone."

"You know," I said, "you can tell me anything you want too."

Tina looked into my eyes and opened her mouth to speak. Then she closed it again. I felt something pass between us but it was gone in the blink of an eye. Tina looked at the clock on my desk and told me that it was time for her to go. She had an 8 AM class. I thanked her for coming over and for her help with my poem. I opened the door for her and, as she walked past me, I put my hand on her elbow. She turned to face me and I suddenly realized how class we were. Well, there was only one thing to do now. I leaned in and closed my eyes. Our lips brushed together softly, then parted.

"Goodnight," I told her.

"Goodnight," she said in a whisper, and then she was gone.

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Halloween

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That kiss was on my mind all the next day. I looked forward to coming to class and talking to Tina about what had happened, maybe even ask her out to a Halloween party that night, or hear an answer to my prayers in the form of Tina confessing to me that she was a transsexual. I kept running over the events of last night, as well as the last few weeks, trying to find some clue which would tell me beyond any doubt that Tina had a cock in those cut off shorts. She was nearly everything I wanted, all rolled up into one package, but did she have a package? That was the question.

As it turned out, our teacher had some kind of family emergency to deal with, so our Creative Writing class was cancelled that day. I never even saw Tina. Dejected, I went home and took a nap for a few hours, until it was time to meet up with my friend Gabe. He and I were going on a little shopping excursion to find the last missing pieces for our Halloween costumes. He was going as a gym teacher and I had made my own Superman costume, a deliberately cheesy one constructed from blue sweatpants and a sweatshirt, a logo cut off of Gabe's old Superman t-shirt, red briefs, and a red sheet for a cape. It looked bad, but I knew people would love it.

Once we were all dressed, we met up with some more friends, and went from party to party. As always happens, the group tapered off, as one guy got sick and went home or another hooked up with a girl or another just seemed to be swallowed up by the crowd. Around 1:00 AM, we found ourselves at a house party in an off-campus condo not far from the dorms. I was drinking, not a ton but just enough to add some more fun to the atmosphere, and just having a good time in general. My Superman costume was a big hit, particularly with the girls.

At one point, as I was talking to a redhead dressed like Audrey Hepburn, a guy with zombie make-up, shredded clothes, and a knife sticking out of his back approached me. I didn't know him but we had talked a bit since I arrived at the party and even been partners for beer pong. He was a pretty cool guy so, when he told me, "There's this girl whose costume you should see outside", I went with him.

We walked outside where a second beer pong table had been set up and groups were playing or watching or just milling about. As my new undead friend led me towards the girl, I stepped on a beer can, and it sprayed all over my foot. So I was looking down when he finally brought me to the girl. I looked up and my eyes moved from her blue boots to a blue, pleated skirt, and from past a yellow belt to a skin-tight spandex top with an "S" logo over the c-cup breasts, to a pretty face framed by flowing, blonde hair.

"Superman," said the zombie, "meet Supergirl."

It was Tina. For the first time, I was seeing her dressed up with her hair done and even wearing a little bit of make-up. She had been beautiful before. Now she was breath-taking. Plus the Supergirl costume was super sexy. Judging by the way her eyes over me, I could tell that she was feeling more than just appreciation for my fine tailoring skills.

After explaining to our zombie friend that we knew each other already, Tina and I excused ourselves, and went for a little walk. I took her hand in mine, not knowing how she would react, but hoping she wouldn't pull her hand away. She didn't. We talked about the kiss we had shared the previous night and I told Tina that it had been more than just a kiss to me. I really liked her and wanted to know if she felt the same way.

"I guess so," she said quietly.

"Well, do you or don't you?" I asked, trying to coax a solid answer out of her.

"I do like you," she said.

"But do you like me the same way I like you?"

"Yes . . ."

"Then what's the problem? We should be together."

"Don't you have a girlfriend, though?"

"She and I agreed that we could date other people once the school year started. That won't be a problem. At least, not for me."

We walked together in silence a little further. I could sense that Tina wanted to tell me something, hopefully the something I was waiting to hear, so I finally stopped and took both her hands in mine. I squeezed them lightly and kissed her on the forehead, then the cheek, and finally her pale, pink lips. When she opened her eyes, she looked away, but I put my finger under her chin and made her look into my eyes.

"I have to tell you something," she said at last.

"What?" I asked, my heart pounding.

"I can trust you, right? Even if you hate me after I tell you this, you can't tell anyone."

"I won't hate you. But I promise I won't tell."

"OK," she said, then took a deep breath. "That story I wrote . . . it was based on me . . . I'm a . . . transsexual."

"Pre-op?" I asked.

"Yes," she said, nodding. She had begun to cry, so I opened my arms, and let them envelope her. I held her as she cried softly for just a few moments, then moved away so that I could kiss her again. This time, it wasn't just the kind of soft, nervous kisses we'd had so far. This was a full-on lip lock. At first, Tina remained rigid, but soon she began to relax and she leaned her body into mine, pressing her tits against me. Our lips opened and our tongues met. When it was over, I looked into her brilliant, blue eyes and ran my fingers through her silky, blonde hair.

"The girl in your story was in love with a boy she thought she couldn't have sex with," I said. "Was that boy based on anyone real?"

"Yes," she said.

"Anyone I know?" I asked.

"You." We both smiled.

"We can give that story a happy ending," I said. "My roommate is gone for the night. I have the room to myself."

"I'm nervous."

"So am I. But excited too."

"Promise you won't be grossed out by me?"

"I wasn't grossed out by Rebecca. Why do you think I would be grossed out by you?"

"She was your girlfriend. You loved her."

"Well, you're my girlfriend now. Come on. Let's go back to my place."

Tina and I managed to get a ride from a frat boy I knew. His fraternity had a sober driver organization that could be called upon to ferry around drunk members. As it so happened, the frat boy I knew had plenty of room in the car, so he said it would be fine for Tina and me to ride along. We sat together in the back seat, holding hands, both quietly dreaming of what would await us when we got to my dorm.

A few minutes later, we were there. I thanked the driver (and the friend who had hooked me up) and together Tina and I walked into my building. I had to sign her in since it was a school regulation but soon we were on the elevator, heading up. When we reached my floor, we walked down the hall, and Tina waited as I opened the door. I flicked on the light and moved excitedly into the room.

Tina was admiring a poster on my roommate's wall when I suddenly grabbed her from behind and pulled her down on to my lap. She was surprised at first but then, when she felt my arms around her waist, pulling her tightly against my body, she soon relaxed. She allowed me to nuzzle my face into her hair and then begin to kiss her long, slender neck.

"You're so beautiful," I told her.

"Shh," she said. "I am not."

"You're a goddess."

"I'm not that either."

"You're the perfect woman."

"Do you really mean it, Jordan?"

I removed my face from her neck and looked into her dazzling blue irises.

"I mean it, Tina," I told her. "There's no other girl within thousands of miles I'd rather be with."

"Do you love me?" she asked. I breathed deeply.

"I do love you," I said, "but I can't be in love with you because of . . ."