Unforgivable

"That sounds so amazing!" Colby said with genuine admiration, even though most of it went right over her head.

"I'm not bragging or anything, but it really is. I still can't believe I fly Raptors. I could have ended up flying any airplane in the Air Force inventory, and yet I got my first choice, and yes, they are very cool."

"How fast can you go in one of those?" Bianca asked.

"Would you believe 1,498 miles per hour?" Drew said with a smile as he looked at her in the rearview mirror.

"That's like a race car, right?"

Even Colby laughed at that.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing, honey," her mom said as she looked at Drew who smiled, causing her to laugh.

"It's not that funny," Bianca insisted.

"My plane is just a whole lot faster than the fastest race car. That's all," Drew told her in a fatherly kind of way. "We weren't being mean, okay?"

"Okay!" Bianca said as the sign for Sage came into view. "Hey! There's the Sage place!"

"Yes indeed," Drew replied as he put on his turn signal.

Colby noticed and said, "Thank you for using your blinker. I can't stand it when people don't."

"Oh, don't get me started!" Drew agreed. "They just start slowing down, and boom!"

"I know! That drives me crazy!" Colby agreed back as they both laughed.

There was a short wait for a table, and as they sat waiting in the lobby, Colby asked Drew if he was excited about going to Hawaii.

"I want to go to Hawaii!" Bianca said again.

"Bianca? Please," her mom said as nicely as she could and got a genuine 'sorry' in return.

"I am. I mean, they have F-22s at Tyndall here in northwest Florida, but I didn't join the Air Force to see the world only to end up back home."

He thought about explaining how the base had basically been obliterated by Hurricane Irma, and that F-22s were only kinda-sorta back. Tyndall was an option, but it wasn't Drew's first (or even second or third) choice. In fact, one of his best friends from flight school wanted Hickam so bad he offered Drew a thousand dollars to swap orders with him. Drew never seriously even thought about it, because, who would give up Hawaii for anything?

"Table for Gillis?" a female voice called out interrupting their conversation.

Drew helped Bianca get seated first so she wouldn't jump into a chair before he could offer his help, then he did the same for her mother. Bianca remembered to thank him this time, and her mom did the same as Drew went to sit down across from them.

Colby no sooner opened the menu than she gasped.

"Drew? These prices are..."

She looked around then 'loudly whispered', "Insane!"

He smiled and only said, "Please order anything you like, and don't even look at the price, okay?"

"I...I can't not look," Colby said as she looked again and shook her head.

Just a burger cost $13, more than she spent for her and her daughter at a fast food joint for everything.

"We'll just get the burgers," she said without even looking.

"What? No, you will not!" Drew said with another smile.

He slid into the chair next to her, and started pointing to the entrees.

"Look. This Iron-Seared Shrimp and Scallop plate looks delicious," he suggested.

"It looks very expensive," Colby countered.

"Okay, how about the seared salmon or the spice-rubbed tenderloin?"

"Money and more money," Colby replied.

Drew grabbed the menu without being 'grabby', shut it, then said, "I'm ordering for you."

"Drew! You can't..."

"Ah! Shhh!" he said as he moved away. "We'll get three entrees, and Bianca will surely find something she likes among all that."

"What are we getting, Mom?" her very excited daughter asked as she looked up at her mom's face that seemed frozen and expressionless.

"A fortune in food," she quietly replied.

Their server came over and introduced herself and asked if they'd decided.

Drew said he had and ordered the shrimp & scallops, the pork tenderloin, and the quajillo half chicken along with a bottle of white wine.

"And what would you like to drink, Bianca?" he asked without even looking at her mom.

"Coke, please!" she said.

"Any appetizers?" she asked in a chipper tone of voice.

"No. No appetizers," Colby told her without looking at Drew.

"Three bowls of Soupe a L'Oignon," he said with a smile, not looking at Colby whose jaw was hanging down slack.

"Very good. I'll be right back with your soup and your drinks!" she happily replied.

Drew knew Colby could take anything they didn't eat back with her, but he wasn't about to mention he knew they needed it. He just insisted it was a great way to expose Bianca to new things.

"Like...the national debt," Colby said, knowing her daughter wouldn't understand.

Drew, of course, did get it, and he only laughed.

"If you can tell me you're not hungry, I'll cancel one of the entrees," he said with a big smile on his face.

Colby wasn't just hungry, she was nearly shaking from not having eaten anything since breakfast, and that had been a sticky donut at the precinct.

So the only thing she said was, "Thank you, Drew."

"My pleasure," he replied as he winked at Bianca who tried to wink back.

"I can never get that!" she said as she tried holding one eye open while closing the other.

Drew winked each eye several times real fast, and Bianca giggled again, and that helped Colby relax. She even laughed, and when she did, Drew winked at her. And that sent a kind of chill through her body as she realized again how incredibly handsome he was before looking away.

Colby knew she wasn't unattractive, but Drew was so far out of her league in terms of looks, that even the age difference didn't let her feel like she was his equal. Of course, this wasn't a date, and there never would be a date, but she found it very hard not to stare at him throughout the course of their meal.

When the soup arrived, Bianca very gingerly stuck the tip of her tongue on the soup in her spoon. Expecting an 'eew!', Colby was shocked when her daughter said, "Mmmm. Yummy!"

Her mom then took a taste of it, and rolled her eyes heavenward.

"Oh, my gosh! This is SO good!"

"I know, right?" Drew replied as he got ready to take a second 'bite'.

"That was a meal itself, "Colby said as she slurped up the last of it. She wanted to tip the bowl and drain every drop but left a little in the bottom that she couldn't get on her spoon.

"So what do you like to do, young lady?" Drew asked Bianca just before their entrees arrived.

Just a year ago, she'd have said, "Jump rope, play with my friends, and play games on the computer."

But now she said, "Well, I kind of like boys..."

She was grinning when she looked at her mom who was giving her the 'you've got to be kidding' look.

"Well, I do, Mom," she insisted before telling Drew that she liked makeup and clothes.

"Not school?" he asked as though he was extremely hurt.

"I like school," Bianca said. "Kind of. I just don't like the school I go to."

Colby ran her fingers through her daughter's hair and said, "She's had a tough time this last year or so."

When Bianca got a sad look on her face, her mom said, "But I'm so proud of her."

And just like that, the smile was back, and Colby was rewarding with Bianca leaning her head on her arm and also squeezing it.

Not wanting to get into a discussion about her ex-husband, Drew noticed their server bringing their food.

"Here we go!" he said as everyone set up straight.

"Okay, three entrees and empty plates so we can pick and choose," the young girl said, repeating what Drew had told her when he placed the order.

"Colby? Would you like a glass of wine?" he asked.

"Oh. Um, sure. Yes, thank you. That sounds nice," she said. It had been many months since she'd had a glass of wine, and since it was already paid for, she decided to go ahead.

Drew poured it then did the same for himself, then said, "Cheers!" but before he could take a sip, Bianca asked if they were going to do a toast thingy.

"Ah, yes. The toast thingy," Drew said with a smile.

"Colby?" he asked.

"I don't have any idea," she told him, suddenly feeling 'stupid'.

"Okay. Um...to...fate. Bringing us together," Drew suggested.

Colby smile happily and said, "I'll drink to that!"

"Me, too!" Bianca said as she offered her soda glass to clink with the adults' wine glasses.

"To fate!" they all said.

"Oh, my. That's very good, too!" Colby said after taking a decent-sized first sip.

"I'm glad you like it," Drew told her. "I don't drink very often anymore, but when I do, I enjoy a really good glass of wine or champagne."

Within minutes, all three of them had sampled each of the three entrees and announced their favorite. Bianca loved the pork but decided the scallops were too 'fishy'. Her mom told her those were her favorite while Drew cut off a large chunk of chicken and said, "Mmmm!" each time he took a bite, getting a laugh from Bianca every single time.

Colby let Drew pour her a second glass, but she barely touched it knowing she had to get up early to go to work then start getting serious about her final finals.

"So what do you want to do once you get your degree?" Drew asked after everyone was full and the leftovers were being boxed up.

"Anything that pays better than waitressing at IHOP," she told him with a warm smile. Just the one glass of wine on a mostly empty stomach had really hit her, and she felt even better than she had just sitting across from such an attractive man; even a much-younger one.

"And how about you, Miss Bianca? What do you want to be when you grow up?"

"Well...I want to be a makeup artist," she announced.

"Oh?" her mother replied.

"Well, yeah. I mean, I love makeup, and that way I could do it all the time and make lots of money!"

"Oh, I see," her mom replied, not wanting to burst her daughter's bubble.

"Do you like math and science?" Drew asked.

"Not really," Bianca told him.

Without getting preachy, Drew explained why those things were so important.

"So you mean I could fly a really fast plane like you do?" she asked, not sure she believed that was possible.

"Yep. We had two women in my flight school class, and both of them graduated with me. One of them finished at the top of our class, and she's a better pilot than I am," he admitted.

"Cool!" Bianca said, loving that a woman was better at something.

"Not that cool," Drew said in a way that made Colby laugh.

"You're so good with her," Colby said with genuine sincerity.

"I didn't get into the details, but I mentioned how my dad turned my life around, and I've always had a special place in my heart for kids who have a...person in their lives...like the man whose DNA I share."

He smiled at Bianca then said, "Especially silly ones who sneak out of the house and night and go to parties with high school boys."

Her pretty face turned red again as she looked up at her mom then said, "Sorry?"

Colby put her arm around her daughter and told her how much she loved her.

"I love you too, Mom."

Drew watched Colby's eyes get glassy then saw her reach for a napkin. He could tell she was embarrassed and quietly told her, "I get it. I really do."

"I just worry so much about this one, you know?" she told him while glancing at her daughter.

"She won't ever do that again. Right, Bianca?" Drew asked with a warm, friendly smile.

"No. I won't. I promise," she told him.

"Does anyone want dessert?" he asked, hoping to lighten the mood.

"Me!" Bianca said immediately.

"Um...I think we've had more than enough," her mom quietly told her.

"It's not my decision, but I can so see your mom eating a piece of..."

Drew picked up the dessert menu then said, "Candy Bar Tort."

Before Colby could respond, Drew read, "Made with roasted pecans and vanilla ice cream."

"Yum! Can we, Mom?" Bianca asked.

"Honey, we've already spent a fortune of Drew's money, so..."

Drew caught their server's eye and motioned for her.

"Three candy bar torts, please," he told her as Colby just stared at him.

As an accounting geek, she was keeping track of every dollar and knew they were well over $100 without the dessert or the tip.

"What? Who eats a meal without dessert?" Drew said pretending to be defensive.

"We do!" Bianca told him. "We never have dessert."

"We do, too," her mom replied. "Sometimes."

"Mom, a Reese's peanut butter cup isn't dessert," her daughter informed her.

"It is when that's all you..."

She stopped then looked at Drew.

"Sorry. I don't mean to be a Debby Downer. We just don't ever do anything like this."

"Then I'm just that much happier that we came here tonight," he told her.

The way he said those words coupled with what he said sent another wave of something through Colby, and after holding his stare for several seconds she had to look away again.

"Any plans for summer vacation?" Drew asked Bianca without thinking.

"I'm always spend a month with my..."

Bianca realized she wouldn't be spending any time with her father for several years and got very quiet.

To his, and her mother's great relief, the dessert arrived just in the nick of time.

Drew watched Colby and then Bianca take a bite, and the expressions on their faces told him all he needed to know.

"This is SO good!" Colby said as the flavor exploded on her taste buds.

"Mmmm! I LOVE this ice cream!" Bianca said after tasting the rich dessert.

Everyone was beyond full when they left, and each of them was carrying a box of leftovers as they went outside.

Very little was said as they headed home. Colby knew this was the end, and even Bianca seemed to understand they would never see Drew Gillis again. When they pulled into the driveway, Drew asked if he could help them carry anything inside.

Colby said 'no thank you' but asked Bianca to tell Drew thank you and say good night and take a box with her.

"I'll be right in, okay?" she told her daughter.

Bianca did what she was told and even tried to give Drew a hug the best she could from the back seat.

"Night, pretty girl," he told her before she got out.

"Is something wrong?" he asked Colby once Bianca was safely inside.

"No. I...I just wanted to thank you. That's all."

"You're very welcome," he told her.

She almost started to open her door but hesitated.

"You know I'm not gonna let you do that yourself, right?" Drew told her before opening his in order to come around.

"Wait," Colby said.

Drew closed the door then waited.

"I...I was just wondering. Why are you being so nice to us, Drew? It's obvious you're a really great guy, but you didn't need to do any of this."

Drew sat there for a moment then looked over at Colby and said, "Okay, I told myself I wouldn't say this, but I feel like I have to."

"Oh, okay," she said, expecting something terrible.

"Initially, I was just doing the right thing. When I saw Bianca at the party, there was no way I could go home and pretend I didn't see her there."

He waited again then spoke.

"But when I saw you, the two of you at the police station this morning, I don't really know how to explain this, but I had this...this feeling or..."

Drew laughed then said, "Wow. I was about to say 'premonition'."

"Premonition?" Colby asked, still waiting for the 'other shoe to drop'.

"I'm not some kind of New Ager or anything, so I don't know where this is coming from, but I couldn't shake this feeling that..."

"What?" she asked very quietly.

"Promise me you won't laugh."

"I promise. Just tell me. Please."

"I...it felt like you and me... No. The three of us. It was like...we belonged together. Or something like that."

He looked right at Colby then asked, "How weird is that?"

"I don't know," she replied just as quietly as before. "How weird does it seem to you?"

"The really crazy thing is...it doesn't. At all."

"Drew," Colby said. "You're quite possibly the best-looking guy I've ever seen."

She tried to laugh then said, "Including actors on TV."

Drew laughed, too, but let her go on.

"And I'm, well, I'm not. That good looking. I'm not even close. And then there's this other little issue of me having a 12-year old daughter, and gee, um...I'm 35 years old. So...that's what makes it weird. To me. Okay?"

He sat there and tried to see her in the dim light then finally said, "So you don't feel anything for me? At all?"

"What?" Colby replied with a nervous laugh. "What do you even mean? Like in your premonition kind of way?"

"Yes. Or...any other way. Am I so bad...I am someone you wouldn't even consider dating?"

"Dating? Drew, are you serious?" she asked, almost unable to believe what she was hearing.

"I'm trying to be, but you keep asking me questions rather than answering mine," he told her with a warm smile.

She looked back at him then said, "I'm extremely confused right now."

"Maybe if I were more direct that would help," Drew said.

"Yes, that would be nice," Colby said until he started leaning her way. She tried to ask what he was doing, but when his mouth ended up on hers, it made speaking very difficult. Even worse, after a second of quasi-protest, she kissed him back.

"So, did that help?" he quietly asked.

"You just kissed me," she nearly whispered. "Why would you do that?"

"Maybe I was wrong," Drew replied.

"Huh?"

He laughed then told her he was attracted to smart women.

"And because I thought you were smart, I found myself attracted to you. And that's why I kissed you. But you don't seem to feel the same way, and that's why I said 'maybe I was wrong'. So...does that help?"

"Drew, you're going to Hawaii in less than a month," Colby said without answering another of his questions.

"So you have no feelings for me at all?" he asked again in a slightly different way, ignoring what she just said.

"Like you? I...I've had this schoolgirl crush on you since you walked into the police station and smiled at me. And I never have crushes. Ever."

"I want to see you again, Colby," he said he reached over and gently brushed her hair back.

"Bianca must be getting worried," she told him as she tried to turn away.

"Okay. If this isn't working for you, I understand. I just really like you, Colby, and I guess I was hoping against hope you might feel that way about me. But since you don't..."

Drew stopped talking, turned around, then went to reach for the doorhandles again when Colby grabbed his arm and said, "Wait!"

"Again?" Drew said with a chuckle as he stopped. Again.

As he went to turn around, Colby nearly fell on top of him as she nearly climbed over over the gear shift and not only kissed him but almost smothered him.

"So you do like me," Drew said with a smile when she finally let him go.

"I really, really do," she finally admitted. "But for the life of me I can't understand why you like me."

"If you'll agree to see me again, I'll tell you why? Deal?"

"Okay. Yes," Colby said very quietly before Drew leaned her way and kissed her one more time.

"Now let me come get your door and I'll walk you to the porch."

Colby's heart was racing so fast she thought she might actually die of a heart attack as she watched him go around the front of the car. But she not only didn't, she made it to her front porch where she and Drew kissed one more time for several seconds before she finally went inside.

To her very great relief, Bianca hadn't been watching. But no sooner did her mom walk in when she started talking about what a great time she had. With Drew.

Everything was 'Drew this' and 'Drew that'. And because her mother was so smitten with this gorgeous, younger man, all she could do was agree with everything her daughter said.

The problem for Colby that evening wasn't confusion. It was time. She had virtually no free time whatsoever. And blowing off finals wasn't an option. Nor was taking a day off work. She already had more student debt than she could bear to think of, there was a second mortgage on her modest home, and she needed an actual, well-paying job in the very near future.