What If? Reading Erotica Ch. 04

I would like to thank everyone for their comments about my story. I try to put true feelings and emotions into my writing. If my story makes you feel emotions, either positive or negative, then I've done my job. Again, I would like to thank "omegazone" for taking the time to edit my story. I really appreciate it. If you haven't read Chapters 1-3, please do so, you need the facts, to make a fair judgement call.

Chapter 4:

A note from Roger:

I want you to know that I have gone through the whole realm of emotions, hate, sadness, pain, even love, to name a few. I have been offered advice from a lot of people. Everything from kill Marsha, to take her back and love her, from throw her cheating ass out, to forgive her. There is no advice that I haven't thought of. She was a wonderful wife and mother for twenty plus years, and a lying cheating bitch for six months. Once I finish this story I will walk away from this computer into a real world, with real people, with real problems. I now have to decide if I will face this future with or without Marsha.

Sincerely; Roger

It was morning and time to get up, I didn't sleep at all, I just kept tossing and turning. My life was turned totally upside down and decisions had to be made. I got up and went upstairs to put on the coffee and call my office to let them know I wouldn't be in till the afternoon. I was going to take the whole day off but I knew I needed to get out of the house for a while and get my mind on something else.

When I got upstairs, I could already smell the coffee. Marsha must already be up. I was pouring myself a cup of coffee when Marsha entered the room. She was very nicely dressed, not sexy, but neat and smart looking. She looked like a business woman and dressed the part. She wasn't out to turn heads today.

After saying morning to her, I didn't say good morning because there wasn't anything good about it for me. I asked her to call me if she would be working so I could replan my day if necessary.

She asked me when we were going to talk?

I told her that we could talk later that day or Saturday, but it would be at least Monday before I would have any decisions made. There was just too much happening to make quick decisions. We have our family to think about as well as Nancy's children here for a few days.

Marsha said that she thought I was acting awfully calm about the whole situation.

I looked at her with a deep stare and told her that my stomach was eating away at me, that I could kill her for what she did, that our life as we knew it is over. I was doing everything possible not to lash out at her, to scream, yell, and yes even strike her.

She looked at me and knew I was telling the truth. It scared her a little. She quickly changed the subject and mentioned that Nancy's boys would be up within the hour and would need breakfast.

I told her I'd take care of it, cereal isn't that hard to make. Then she left for her appointment with her Boss, Mr. Little.

She later told me about the meeting.

When she arrived at the office, everyone became very quiet. Mr. Little asked her to step in his office.

They both sat down as Mr. Little began to speak.

"Marsha, we have a very delicate situation here. I have to decide what is best for the agency. Everyone who works here signs a misconduct contract which states that any employees acting in an un-business like manner can be terminated. They do have a right to counsel and a meeting with the dispute board. I was hoping that we wouldn't have to go that far. That much publicity would hurt the agency win or lose."

Marsha began to speak but Mr. Little cut her off. . . . .

"Please Marsha let me finish, this is very difficult for all involved. I will let you have your say after I explain this to you. If you leave quietly, I am willing to compromise. This incident will not go on your record, so if you look for work elsewhere it would be of great importance to you. We will also pay you for the two weeks vacation that you have coming. You would have to sign a legal agreement agreeing to the terms. The document would be put in your folder but not on your record. Do you have any questions?"

"First, Mr. Little, I want to apologize for my actions at this agency. I made a very big mistake and now I'm paying for it. I will take your offer, and I thank you for being discreet about the incident. However, I would like to know about the agents involved. Are they all to lose their jobs also?"

"Well Marsha, each agent involved has been given a choice. If he chooses to leave the agency, he will be given the same choice as you, but if he decides to stay this incident will become a permanent part of his employment record for the next three years. After that it will be expunged from their record. Of course if any more misconduct is found they will be immediately dismissed."

"Four of the agents have decided to stay with the agency. Jim however, chose to leave saying it was all your fault and wasn't going to have it on his record. Bob's situation is different. As of right now he is on medical leave. If he is prosecuted for any wrong doing in this case involving his wife he will be dismissed. There is no room in this agency for a man that beats his wife and endangers his children. If he isn't prosecuted he will have the same choice as the other agents."

"I am sorry to have to let you go. Your work here was exemplary, but your misconduct couldn't be tolerated. Again, I'm very sorry to see you leave. Good luck to you and I hope everything turns out all right for you."

Marsha got up said her goodbye, cleaned out her desk and left the office.

After she arrived home she explained everything that happened at the office. Then she immediately became "house mom", her maternal instincts just took over. She started cleaning up the breakfast mess and made sure Nancy's boys were taken care of. She was like a different women. She talked with our sons and told them she quit her job and would be there for them if they needed her. She was the Marsha that I loved for our first 20 yrs.

I mentioned to Marsha that I was going over to the hospital and see how Nancy was doing and then going over to work for a few hours.

She just smiled and said, "OK, tell Nancy I'll stop by with the boys tomorrow so she can see them. The kids are to young to go up to her room but we can meet in the family lounge. If she's not feeling up to it tell her to give me a call."

I left to see Nancy still not knowing what my future plans were. When I arrived at the hospital Nancy was just laying in bed. She saw me and tried to smile but said it hurt to much.

She had talked to the doctors, they told her that even though her face was badly bruised it would heal within a few weeks. She was very lucky not to have had a serious concussion or broken teeth. There was some damage to her left eye but it should heal eventually. She also had two cracked ribs which were going to take awhile to heal. She would probably be in the hospital for the better part of a week. But the ribs would take at least a month to get back to normal. After she was released from the hospital she would have to still take it easy for awhile.

Nancy had said that the police came back to talk to her and the County Prosecutor would be in to talk to her the first thing Monday morning. The police did not charge her with any crime, they felt she was protecting herself and her children.

Nancy had talked to the nurses to find out the latest on Bob. He had two bullets removed from his abdomen area. He was in surgery for about three hours. He will survived but his insides got badly torn up. He didn't deny what he did but said he was probably insane when he did it.

Nancy asked me to contact a lawyer so she could start divorce proceedings and get a restraining order against Bob to keep him away from her and her children. She also wanted to thank me and Marsha for looking after her kids, and to let Marsha know that she didn't hold any grudges against her. Nancy says that Marsha just made a big mistake.

I mentioned to Nancy that I wish I could look at it that way, but I could not.

On Saturday Marsha took Kyle and Robbie (Nancy's kids) to see their mother. Nancy was put in a wheel chair and brought into the family lounge to see her kids. Marsha could tell that Nancy's ribs were hurting but nothing was going to keep her from seeing her kids, and they were happy to see her also. They all visited for an hour or so and then Nancy had to go back to her room. Marsha took the kids over to McDonalds and let them play for awhile. Then, they all came back to the house.

Our sons were going to a football game and asked if I was going? I told them "not tonight" that I had something to discuss with their mom and wouldn't be able to make it. They asked if they could take Kyle along so he could see a high school game, they were kind of fond of the little guy. I thought that would be a good idea, so off they went to their game. We kept Robbie, since he wasn't even a year old. Marsha put him in for a nap and we began our discussion.

Marsha spoke first, "Roger I'm so sorry, I made such a big mistake and don't know how I could possibly correct it?"

Roger said, "You can begin by just telling me ."Why?"

"It all began after my 40th birthday, maybe even a little before. I didn't feel needed anymore. The boys were growing up and I was just getting older. The compliments from you were getting less, like you didn't even notice me."

"So you feel it's my fault what you did?" replied Roger.

"No, not really, but it added to my depressed state. I wanted to feel young again. I wanted to feel love and excitement like we did when we first met."

"So you felt that cheating and having affairs with strange men was the answer to your problems?"

"No, no Roger, I didn't know what I wanted. I kept watching you get excited reading the stories and thought you might want to try living out a fantasy or two. That it might put something new into our marriage. Maybe a spark of some type."

"So your saying you thought I might want to swap wives, or have group sex, or even be cuckolded?"

"I didn't know what to think Roger, all I knew is whenever you read the erotic stories you got hot. I wanted to share in those feeling, whatever they were."

"Let's use an example here Marsha, since you already fucked Bob. Are you saying if I would have fucked Nancy that our marriage would be much better? What if I fucked Jim's wife or Aaron's wife, you believe we would have a much stronger marriage? If we agreed to both fuck with a lot of different people you believe we would have an improved marriage? Is this what you're telling me? You want me to fuck other women so you can fuck other men and improve our marriage?"

"God NO Roger! It would ruin our marriage, I can't believe what I was thinking. Why do people believe that would improve their marriage? What have I done?"

"Well Marsha, lets go one step further. You did exactly that, only without me or my permission. You cheated on me with at least six men that I know of. You played me for six months, thinking I had a caring wife. Instead you were a slut and whore for anyone who wanted it. You fucked and sucked anyone who asked. You cuckolded me, and made a game of it. I'll tell you what you've done Marsha, 'you've ruined our marriage, you've ended it.' Now you want me to forgive and forget. I can't do that Marsha, my mind and heart won't let me."

Marsha started crying and went into her bedroom.

I just sat there in the chair wondering, 'What's Next?'

Chap. 5

We made it through the weekend and now it was decision time. I called work and told them I would be out for a couple of days. The nice thing about middle management is no one really questions me about what I'm doing. I also have my home office so my work is always done on time.

I contacted a lawyer who was known to be the best with divorce cases. I also wanted a female lawyer for both my case and Nancy's. Sally Hawk, was her name. Smart, intelligent, good looking, articulate and a definite winner when it came to divorce cases, she knew the law. She was considered the best in her field.

After introducing myself I explained that I had two cases for her. I started with Nancy's situation and explained everything that happened to her up to that point.

Sally said she would be over to see Nancy that afternoon and if what I said was true, there would be no problems with the divorce for Nancy. She would probably get everything except the cost for an attorney if his case went to trial.

I then told Sally about my situation.

She looked at me and said, "I could get everything, the house, kids, I could pretty much name my price." What did I have in mind?

After I told her she looked at me and said, "Are you sure about this? You must have really loved this woman to let her off so easy?"

I told her I loved her, and still do, but just couldn't live with her knowing what she did to me.

Sally then stated that she would get to work on the paper work and for me to stop in for the documents at the end of the week.

I thanked her and then headed over to see Nancy to let her know the latest. When I got to the hospital Nancy was looking much better. Her bruising was starting to yellow, and she was able to stand, even though in pain.

I told her about Sally Hawk (the lawyer) and explained that she would be in to see here. I gave her a quick rundown on the conversation I had about her case with Sally. She began to thank me and grabbed my left hand in both of hers. She brought it up to her mouth and kissed it, saying 'Thank you,' with a tear in her eyes.

She then asked me about my situation, but I told her I didn't want to talk about it. She didn't press me about it at all. That's just the kind of person she was. Why any man would beat a woman like this instead of make love to her is beyond me. She just seemed special to me.

Nancy did say that the County Prosecutor was in and is filing charges against Bob. Assault and Battery, and child endangerment, he figures Bobs attorney would try and plea bargain it out but he would still do time. Bob won't be released from the hospital for a couple of weeks, then will be released to his parents custody after posting bound. His parent live in a nearby city, away from us, The court case won't be up for at least 3 months.

That was probably the only good news I heard that day as I headed home. When I got home I told Marsha that I was ready to talk. She asked our sons if they would take Kyle and Robbie to the park for about an hour, that we needed to talk. The boys knew we had a problem but had no idea what was about to happen. They took Robbie in his stroller, and Kyle walked along.

Marsha looked at me when they left, she was already crying.

I said, "Marsha, I gave this as much thought as I could. I can't live with you any longer, my heart burns, because of what you did to me. I know of no way to forgive you. I wish I could, but I'm human and not able. I talked to a lawyer today and will explain what we talked about."

"We have had a lot of good years together. I can't just throw you out and give you nothing. There's times I feel like it, just throw your ass out, and say take that slut! Go whore yourself and make a living. I'm just not made like that Marsha."

Here is what I propose:

"For now I am getting a separation agreement. You can live here with our sons. They need a home and a mother, even though you feel you don't get the attention you want. I am getting an apartment near by so the boys can see me whenever they want, and we can still attend the sporting events together. I will pay a fair child support for the boys, and even an alimony payment so you will be able to survive."

"If either of us decide to divorce, all our marital assets will be divided 50-50. You can live in the house till our youngest son reaches eighteen and then the house will be sold and the equity will also be divided 50-50. Do you have any problem with this agreement?"

Marsha was crying and said, "Only that you won't be here. I really do love you Roger, I didn't realize what I had till I lost it. I really fucked up good. Do you plan on divorcing me Roger?"

"I need time Marsha, I need lots of time. This isn't just a story about a cheating wife. It's about real people in a real world. I don't know what the future will bring, but I'll have to deal with it. I leaving it up to you to tell our sons about our breakup. I'll go along with whatever you say. Don't tell them about the affairs, no boy wants to think about their mother that way."

"I will start moving my stuff out this weekend, I really don't need much," with that said I went out to hunt for an apartment.

I found a condo just a couple of blocks from where we now live. It would be in walking distance for the boys if they wanted to visit. After paying my deposit and looking at the apartment I could feel my heart began to ache. All I could say was damn her, damn her, damn her. Reality was beginning to really set in, and reality hurt.

On Tuesday morning Marsha asked if I would be around that evening? She wanted to go see Nancy who would be getting out of the hospital on Thursday and needed to talk over a few issues concerning the boys. She would only be a couple of hours and wanted to get there by six.

I just said, "That would be fine, no plans here. I'll probably just start packing."

Marsha could see reality was setting in also. She explained to the boys that we were going through some major disagreements and that I would be moving into a condo just a couple blocks away. I would always be available to them.

They asked her if we were getting a divorce and she just replied, "She didn't know yet."

As Marsha was getting dressed to go see Nancy I decided to go in my office and maybe pack up a few things. Then I remembered, I never undid the telephone bug. I just decided to play it and listen to the messages. It started with the one from Bob, then the one from Mr. Little. I decided to just listen to whatever was on the tape while I was packing a few things. There was a number of everyday calls that we all get. Then I was listening to a call between Marsha and Nancy. They were talking about the boys and how everything was going when Marsha asked Nancy if she could ask her a personal question.

Nancy said, "Of course, after everything you've done for me and my boys I have no problem talking with you."

"Please answer truthfully, have you ever slept with Roger?"

There was silence on the phone, then I heard Nancy answer, "I have never done anything inappropriate with Roger. I want to be honest with you, so I will tell you that I have very strong feelings for him. He is the nicest, kindest man that I have ever met. I just can't understand why you did, what you did, I'm just trying to be honest with you. I'm sorry to have said that, but you asked for the truth."

Marsha thanked her for her honesty and changed to some more small talk and then hung up.

I was about ready to stop the messages when another one came on. The voice said, "Hi Marsha, guess who?"

I heard Marsha with in intake of breath and say "Jim, why are you calling here, it's over, all the affairs are over. I'm trying to save my marriage and here you are calling me."

Jim replied with, "It will never be over Marsha, you know Roger isn't going to stay with a slut wife, and you're going to need some fucking and loving."

"Please Jim, don't call here again, it's over between us."

"Marsha, Marsha, Marsha, you need cock, you need a man to tell you how good you are, how desirable you are. No strings attached, we'll just suck and fuck when we want. You won't have to hide it anymore. There's no more Bob in the picture anymore either, just you and me."

Marsha said, "Please Jim don't talk like that to me. I made a big mistake and now I'm trying to correct it."