You Picked a Fine Time, Lucille

She finished and showed me the digital readout.

"Nothing, Mr. Dowd. I went all over him because some people get really creative with the 'chipping'. But he's clean. Bring him back for all his other shots,"

she looked at me, and grinned, "But I'll do a rabies vaccination now, on the house." She went and got the vaccine and gave the dog the shot. He never even flinched.

"Thank you, miss. What can I do with him?"

She looked at me, slightly astonished.

"You're not gonna keep him?" she queried.

"I don't know. What are my options?"

"Well, we can't take him. Against town regulations. And we don't have the room. If you take him to the pound, they'll keep him for two weeks or so, and if no one comes for him, or adopts him, oh, well, you know...."

"If you just let him go, the dog catcher will eventually scoop him up and maybe that gets him an additional week or two. But the end result will be the same."

I looked at the little guy.

"I guess you're coming home with me. I wonder how that will work out?"

YEAH, RIGHT!!

So we went, opened the passenger door, he jumped in and I cranked the window open. (Old truck, you know) and got in the truck and went to the farm. I pulled up and with the rope in my hand, went in the front door.

"Hello!! Daddy's home. I've got a surprise." A small clattering of feet and four children, an attractive young lady, and a grandmotherly woman wiping her hands on a dish towel, came into the living room.

"A DOG! YOU GOT US A NEW DOG!!"

Just like I thought, Alice was speechless. Mrs. Delano was shaking her head, but grinning.

The kids were all over him and they noticed the rope.

"Dad, we can't treat him like this", said Michael. He pulled the rope off and rose and went out to the kitchen, returning with Spike's old collar. It fit almost perfectly.

"But his name...."

"Is Spike II, Dad?" said Mary.

'Well that settles that', I thought.

We adjourned with a lot of laughing and playing around and had hot dogs and beans, iced tea, a salad thrown together by Mrs. Delano from stuff from the garden, and some hard-boiled eggs from our chickens. Not very varied, but healthy. We are poor, after all.

After dinner, we cleaned up, I gave Spike II one of the last few cans of Alpo we had from his namesake and adjourned to the living room. We watched TV for a while. The kids had already done their homework, so Alice said good night, kissed my cheek amid a lot of 'woo-woos' and left for home. We turned in for the night. Tomorrow was Friday. Just another day in 'paradise'.

Friday came and went. I managed to sell the remainder of the wheat crop that I had managed to harvest before the combine went toe's up and went home and paid the most pressing bills, including the registration on my truck. I would still have to get it inspected, but it gave me another few days to play with. Alice showed up with KFC and the fix-ins and we had a decent dinner. She stayed a little later and we played board games with the kids, and Mrs. Delano, and she left at about ten thirty--another nice smooch, on the cheek, but with a squeeze. The kids were busy.

Saturday, I had had had it. I slept late (till 8:00 a.m.-I am a farmer). After coffee and some toast and jelly, I went and washed the last of my farm equipment readying them for sale, washed the truck (I tried to baby it) mowed the front lawn (such as it was), and had lunch. Then I went and sat in the kitchen and went over the remaining bills, and read the mail. Depressing. At about 4:00 p.m., Alice showed up and we made plans for supper. Spaghetti. Nothing fancy, but Alice had brought garlic bread (OOOH).

After dinner, we adjourned to the living room. We turned on the T.V. We watched some mindless drivel (sorry but I couldn't concentrate) and then the news came on. The usual- school business, a burglary, a story about the highway extension (right through my farm!) then sports, with a recap about Kansas City Chiefs getting their asses kicked on Thursday Night Football. (Figures. Story of my life.) The a brief blurb about the Power ball drawing, Right after a commercial.

Alice was sitting on my right, and Mary came and sat on my left.

"Hey, Dad, how come we never try the lottery? Maybe we can get lucky?"

I turned at looked at her.

"All we have to do is buy a ticket, Dad".

Ticket. Ticket. Why did that word grab at my mind......TICKET!!!

I jumped up and raced to my room, grabbed my dirty work shirt, and in the top pocket, crumbled and folded was...... THE TICKET!! Somehow, this ticket was to be our saving grace. I raced back to the living room to my bewildered girlfriend (OH, COME ON. You didn't see this coming?), a slightly frightened oldest daughter, a surprised number three child, and my curious son. My youngest daughter was chewing a cookie, and looking at everything happening with amusement. I plopped down on the couch, between my two girls, and showed them the small piece of paper. Just then the TV came back from the commercial and the Powerball spot started, with their spiel of what the winning numbers would generate.

"The Power-Ball jackpot for tonight is up to $237,000,000 dollars. Here are tonight's winning numbers. Good Luck!!"

And they started.

"10-12-22-36-50, and the Red Power-Ball is-...."

"Seven," said Matt. He had been staring at the ticket in his hand as the announcer read the numbers, and he enunciated the Red Ball number just before the announcer did, looking up at the screen.

"...... 7", said the man on the TV.

"7.....7.....He said 7!!".

His daughter looked on in amazement, and Alice was thunderstruck. By now Michael had joined them and was just coming up to speed. But it was his question that shocked everyone.

"Did we win? DID WE WIN, DAD??".

All Matt could do was repeat, "7..7...7.." over and over again. His body was in a trance-like condition, but his mind was racing, sub-consciously.

'4 children, one grandmotherly-like housekeeper, a cute girlfriend, and a new dog. 7. 7 people and things in my life that mean the most to me. 7...7' He was stuck in this frame of reference.

Alice was talking to him, shaking him.

"MATT! MATT, SWEETIE! Talk to me!!"

His daughter was sniffling and starting to cry.

"Daddy, you're scaring me!" Michael was fidgeting, Jasmine was flat-out crying, and Monica had stopped eating her cookie and was staring.

Alice finally grabbed her cell phone and called her father.

"Hello, sweetheart, how are........" he never finished.

"Daddy, Matt seems to have had some kind of seizure, stroke, or spasm, I don't know what. But I need you to get here as soon as possible."

"O.K., baby, call an ambulance, I'm on my way." He cut the call, grabbed his keys, and raced for the door.

Alice hesitated, remembering the Lottery ticket, and decided against calling an ambulance. Besides, her 'friend' was starting to come around and was laughing and looking at everyone like a madman.

"Everything is alright, now. I think. We're good. Possibly great." He turned and looked at Alice.

Grinning, he said, "You called me 'Sweetie!'"

She blushed, and stammered, "Well, I was worried about you." She hesitated. "Sweetie", she demurred, looking askance from Matt's face. Then she turned and stared right into his eyes.

"Oh, also, I love you. And your kids. And Mrs. Delano." Then, with an impish grin, "Your dog, too."

"Well, now that it looks like I am rich, we can talk about......".

"Just a minute, Matthew Dowd. I loved you when you were dirt poor-literally. I am not some gold-digging slut looking for a sugar daddy!! The money means nothing to me. We can tear the lottery ticket up and flush it down the toilet, and I will still love you!!"

Matt was stunned. About that time, Alice's dad arrived and burst into the house. Well, the front door was open and he didn't damage anything, but he was hustling. He strode in, stopped, and looked around. Not exactly what he was expecting- four excited kids, a grinning 31-year-old guy with his arm around his daughter, that daughter glowing with happiness, but a trifle irked, an older lady sitting in a rocking chair laughing, and a small dog running around looking for affection everywhere he could.

"Soo, what's going on here," he asked.

Alice held Matt's gaze for just a moment, then turned and looked at her father.

"Matthew Dowd just won the lottery, Dad, and he also said he loves me." She turned back to Matt and stared at him.

"And I love him, too."

"Unless rich guys don't care for poor school teachers," she snickered.

Jerry looked at Alice, then at Matt. He saw the ticket in Matt's hand and walked over, sat on their small coffee table, and asked to look at the ticket.

Matt hesitated, then handed Jerry the ticket. Jerry examined the front, then turned it over, checking the back.

'Looks okay to me,' he thought. He noticed it had not been signed. He reached for his smartphone.

"I don't suppose you have Internet service, do you, Matt?"

Matt blushed.

"No, sir, too expensive." Jerry had noticed the older model TV; it even had an old-fashioned 'rabbit ear' type antenna on top. He spooled up the app on his phone for the Powerball and accessed today's numbers. Sure enough, the ticket matched. It was a winner.

"When and where did you get it?" he asked, handing it back to Matt.

"Two days ago, as I was leaving Al's office, I found it on the ground."

Jerry thought for a moment. Then he made a decision.

"Sign the back, right now. Then Monday we will go see Al and I'll talk to a friend of mine who is a financial planner. IF you want to".

"You seem awfully concerned, sir. Is something wrong?"

"Well, if you want my advice, we need to get a lawyer involved, and seeing as how Al Losano is your attorney of record, it would make sense. And seeing as how my daughter says she loves you, and you may be worth a small chunk of change, I think you should take all reasonable protective measures. By Monday, the will be a little more information about the where and how the ticket was sold. You can't buy a ticket with a credit card, so it will have been a cash transaction. We will also know how many other tickets have winning numbers. So we will have an idea of how the money will be split. Then you will have to decide how you want to take the money, how MUCH you want to take, and how you want to split it. Do you understand half of these things??"

The sobering thoughts were running through Matt's mind. It was a little bit more than just the money, but Jerry was right. He got up and went and got a pen. He signed the back of the ticket and went back to the group. He showed Jerry, and Jerry nodded.

"So now, we wait till Monday morning. I'll call my buddy and you get a hold of Al and we'll meet Monday." He shook Matt's hand and turned to leave.

"And Matthew?" he said.

Matt looked at him. "Sir?"

"Behave," he said grinning and casting a sideways glance at his daughter.

"DADDY!!" she blushed. Jerry left, grinning. After all, they were both 30+ years old.

The following morning, under Alice and Mrs. Delano's good influence, they went to church, got some donuts, and returned home to a quiet day.

Monday dawned quiet and clear. It turns out that only one ticket was sold for Saturday's drawing. It was also reported to have been sold for cash at the general store outside of town. No video feed was available, and that meant anyone could have bought the thing. It also turned out that that's where Matt got gas. So the ticket was pretty much invisible. Legitimate, but for all intents and purposes, untraceable.

They arrived at Al Losano's offices and were ushered into the big conference room. Alice had to get to work, teaching school, so it was just Matt and Jerry, with Al and Jerry's friend Art, a local investment banker. He had a good reputation and had been in the Army many years ago. More importantly, he knew Matt's dad from back in the day and had always liked Matt. They got down to business.

Al looked at the lottery ticket, listened to the story, and thought for a moment. He looked at Matt. Art was studying his laptop, on the Lottery website. He was making notes and thinking.

"Matthew "Al said, "what do you want to do? The decision is yours. From what I've seen, the ticket is legal, and yours. All we have to do is cash it in, and.....".

Art smiled and raised his head. He nodded and interrupted Al.

"Basically, what Mr. Losano has told you is correct. The Lottery Commission has determined that only one ticket was sold, to a person or persons unknown, and they are waiting for it to be redeemed. You have 1 year to redeem it and AFTER that the money is gone.

"Now, if you decide to redeem it and want all the money, it would be divided into a payout of,...um-mm approximately $177,700,000 based on the initial amount of $237,000,000.

"Then, the Feds will take at least 25% of that for taxes, but it will probably wind up being the top rate of 37% when you file the following year. So I would recommend giving them the whole amount right off the bat, seeing as how you would be getting so much.

"If you opt for an annuity, you would get an approximate payout over 30 years, dividing the total amount usually by 360 payments. You would receive the whole amount, less taxes, but it would be in lesser amounts over a longer period of time. Understand?"

"I think so. Al, how much will I need to pay all my bills, take care of my family, and be able to do what I want with my life?"

Al looked at Jerry and Art. The two gentlemen were consulting their notes.

"Well," said Art, 'If you take the lump sum payment, you will probably get approx. $154,050,000. Then the Feds will step in and after taxes, you'll have about $98,051,500. That should take care of all taxes today and next year. The state has no tax on Lottery winnings, so you would be good. I would recommend you set up a few trusts to protect your children and your farm."

Al listened and then started.

"I would suggest you Donate the farm, or most of it, to the State University, setting it up in an Arboreal Trust with the School of Agriculture and Farming. That would take care of the highway problem, and the Trust would negate the re-zoning by the County. It would also help by getting the University's Legal team on our side."

Art and Jerry nodded and looked at Matt.

Matt thought long and hard for a few moments.

"I think what I would like to do- he hesitated- is cash in the ticket for a lump sum, pay off the farm's mortgage, break out about 150 acres for me and my family, and do as you said for the rest. I need to pay off the hospital, fix the roof, spruce up the house for what I have in mind, and pay all my other bills. Then some type of Trust funds for my kids, untouchable till they turn college age, or get to be 23 or so, if they decide not to go to college. Then some sort of trust for me that will give me a nice little income, pay back my lawyer," at this, he smiled at Al, "and make some charitable contributions. Maybe I could invest with Art or Jerry to 'hide' the rest.

"Does that sound paranoid?"

"WOW!" said Al. "Where did all that come from?"

Matt grinned.

"From hanging around with you guys."

Art had been following the conversation, but perusing his laptop.

"Well, it may take about 6-8 weeks to process the claim and get the money. But I think that's a good plan. Your debts are more immediate, so we will have to take care of them quickly.

"So we're gonna have to front you some cash to stave off the immediate debts. But I think we can do this."

So the plan was in place. I signed some papers (power of attorney, new will, a request to separate some of the farm) and everything started to come together. Three days later, I cashed the ticket, my immediate bills were paid, and my attorney contacted the University. When they were made aware of what I was offering, they fell all over themselves to oblige. The high-priced big city law firm working for them immediately took over and came up with a better offer. They sectioned off 200 acres that I approved of and offered it to me for a song. They then filed the Arboreal Trust application with the Department of the Interior.

Meanwhile, the ticket was honored and paid in the course of 5 1/2 weeks, and the money-$97,046,504.76 dollars, was deposited in our local bank. I immediately became a celebrity in town. My legal team paid off the loans on the farm-$27,675,000, and signed the trust papers, paying $231,000 to the University for the 200 acres with my house. With the Farm payoff, buying my house back, the hospital bill, taxes on the farm, improvements to the house, truck registration renewal, and a lot of miscellaneous 'things', he wound up with $70,926,800 left from the Lottery. Then they set up 4 trusts for the children's college and a $3,000,000 gift to Mrs. Delano. He repaid all the money advanced to him by his friends, and paid his 'pro-bono' law fees. Then he paid off the building fund debts of the local Catholic, Methodist, Baptist, and Episcopalian churches, and the Jewish Synagogue two towns over. When all was said and done, he was left with $53,026,800. Between Jerry and Art, they set up a trust and several investment funds for his posterity.

But wait, there's more.

The local media and the Lottery Commission, upon learning of the ticket holder's identity, his dire straits, and how he was using his money, made it national news. All over. Even in that little backwater town of Las Vegas, Nevada. And guess who saw the news story, in between shifts as a stripper in a dive bar, because her 'fuck buddy' had squandered all her money, and then split??

All Lucille could think of was 'half that money was hers'. Not the smartest knife in the drawer, huh?? She bartered her body for a trip back home and three weeks later, she showed up in town with a shyster lawyer in tow. Now, the legal beagle representing Ms. Herrman (her maiden name) was not aware of the details of the previous divorce. The settlement, the declaration that 'she wanted nothing to do with the brats', her 'extramarital activities', her former boyfriend, nothing other than the fact that she gave great head, and promised him a cool two million when she won. So he filed for a review of the settlement, and adjudication on her behalf.

However, Al Losano was on top of it. He immediately counter-filed against her, citing the original divorce, the court proceedings, the records of the action, her statement, and the written renouncing of parental rights in exchange for a cash payment. To top it all off, his research showed that her attorney was not licensed to practice in their state. The judge took one look at the paperwork and dismissed the suit. Lucille freaked. Before adjourning, the judge asked Mathew if he would like to say anything.

Matt stood and faced his ex-wife. With a somber look on his face, he said, "You picked a fine time to leave me, Lucille." Then he grinned. "Thank you."

Epilogue

One of the things Matt purchased with his winnings was a one-carat diamond engagement ring. He was fairly confident she would say yes and figured he would go with her to pick out wedding bands. He invited her dad, Al, Gino, and Art to a small backyard party. When the festivities were underway, and people were having a good time, he cornered Alice and shouted for attention. The hubbub quieted down and he turned to Alice, dropped to one knee, and with his kids smiling and waiting, he produced the ring and calmly said, "Alice Vallen (she had taken her maiden name back, after her divorce) I love you more than anything. Will you marry me?"

Alice promptly fainted.

After the expected uproar and helping Alice to a chair and reviving her, she plastered his face with a smoldering kiss.

"I hope that is yes", gasped Matt, as he surfaced, trying hard to breathe.