by secretme
What A great story line. I am sad to see it end, but I hope you have a continuation of the story and people. I would be a super book if published.
Just a great story from start to finish! I like Aislinn and Cullen! There great together! I would love to hear an epilogue about them! I also cant wait for you next story about Cadifor and Makeda! These two sound interesting! Thanks for writing!
But I'm so sad to see it end. Please give us an epilogue on Aslinn and Cullen. I liked the ending but felt that it was kinda rushed; I would have liked the final chapter to be a little more detailed.
Also, please update us on Celia, Mack, and their mating. I love those two as well :)
They finally offically mated : ) Was this the end of the story??
All good stories must have an end but I am very pleased to hear that it will continue. I would love to dig further into Cadifor and Makeda. There seems to be something there that runs deeper then originally thought. And well there is something to be said for the two most powerful lycans coming together for something byond the imagination. :grin: Wonderful chapter as always but i do have to admit it was a bit rushed but good none the less.
But you left us with a happily mated Cullen and Aislinn, and that's wonderful. I also love the open endings and to know that the story is still calling to you to continue. I'm amazed at the amount you were able to write, considering you were also dealing with school work! For a first story, this was really incredibly amazing.
This story has been wonderful from the first chapter. I will definitely reading your future stories and if it comes back to Cullen and Aislinns pack so much the better. Hopefully you can tell other pack members stories.
Thank you for leaving the ending open. I can't wait until you write more of this world. And just for the record the name "wittens" for their babies is perfect, anything else just wouldn't work. I would love for you to do an epilogue just to see how you'd describe them, we never got a description of Keith and Jay's babies so we really just don't know how your picturing them.
I've been following this story since it's first debut...That was great...I'm a little curious to see what happens when they capture Jenna. Or if Aislinn will have all boys, girls or both...
I know you're thinking centering your story around Cadifor and Makeda, but I'm more curious about Mack and Celia. Also, what about Rissa? Will she find a mate?
Anyways, I loved this story, plus the fact that you had a new chapter out practically every day...you are quickly becoming one of my faves...
Please continue with these characters. I would like to see Cadifor's story continue. We need to see where Jenna leads and of course Cadifor as to there for the birth of the Cullen pups. Thanks for a great read!
The PLEASE MORE refers to more than two pups and more about The Arnauk Clan and makeda and cadifor, and Sarah and Drake where are their pups
Please Regards AR
Well it seems I always finish reading your chapters truly amazed with your talent to write the way you do. I am so happy with the way youhave left it. I personally would love to see a chapter or 3 on just what it is like among the pack to be pregnat an have a litter an if while you are with litter you are treated diffrent an such. I also would like to say thank you because you have me concidering writing again an I have not written anything in years so thank you for being such an insperation to me.
Arrowlyn
I would love to see you continue the saga. It is a pleasure to get a glimpse into your imagination. Well written, good story line and charactor development. Good luck with the publishing groups. It would make a great book. Looking foreward to your next story. Thanks.
I very much hope that you will do more stories in this world !! I want to know more and see what happens to them all :)
I love this story and REALLY can't wait for more! But I def DEF want to hear more on the wittens off spring of these two will be amazing!
I am not one to usually leave comments here but having read many simalar stories and liking this genre I have found that story is one of my favorites. Your writing is excellant and the story line kept me on the edge of my seat and constantly checking for the next chapter. If this was a book, I would certainly have bought it! Again, great story and please continue with any story line that is related to this one! THANKS!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
You cant end it already!! lol. It just finally got the the part where they were about to announce the pregnancy.
Damn that winter break! It should be longer. Oh well, i do hope you can continue with this story.
"a bunch of complaints about it being done"
"a bunch of complaints about it being done"
"a bunch of complaints about it being done"
"a bunch of complaints about it being done"
is that enough?
You should really consider bringing your work to a publisher. It's great. All you need to make it that much better is someone to edit the work when you are finished.
I LOVE the Lycan series! I think you should see if you can publish them into a series of novels. I don't read here much but have been watching lately. I never leave feedback, but this has had my attention captured. great job!
I loved this story!! wittens please or i may just go insane while i wonder what happen next!
i think you should continue this story full fledged. i am sure you already have the continuation tingling in the back of your mind, waiting to be written. I know how difficult it is to continue to write day in, day out. However; I think you have left the story in such a state as that it can be continued with no difficulty. Say perhaps Jenna has powers now that Brennus is joined with her or something. Oh the possibilities. To be truthful, the way you came out and started writing the way you did encouraged me to begin my series "If Only". Never stop writing; you're a natural, and I am a HUGE fan, Dragon_13
Thank you so much for this incredible story. I can't bring myself to complain, but hunger for more because it's so very good.
I love love the druid part of Aislinn and would really like to see her develop...you've hinted at how amazing she truly is. I wonder what the children will be like and what impact they will have on the new future of the druid-lycan alliance. Will she and Cullen be a true and amazing alpha team?
I'm sure that anything you wrote about Makeda and Cadifor would be amazing too...but my heart is still with Aislinn and Cullen.
Bliain úr faoi shéan is faoi mhaise duit
As usual, the caliber of your writing is exceptional and the story was extremely well written. I look forward to a continuation of the story at a later, (though not too much later,) date. Thanks
Jack
You are a very talented writer. I love your imagination ;)
Please do continue with this as you can. This ending does leave us hanging for a sequel...they go up the mountain farther with Jenna and Brennus still on the loose?!?! Wittens?!? Druids, Cadifor, oh so much more time we can spend in your imagination! :) thanks for the read, I love it
Here I am again...commenting on how good this series is...I'm tickled that you are looking into getting it published...A good editing is all you need and I think it will be very popular. Please keep us informed as to any progress in that direction.... I could add my plea for more but then I could also just say...excellent work! ~Copper~
I noticed it is a year between your two stories so I'm crossing my fingers you don't have us wait too long for the next one. Your story line is juicy and clever so keep writing!
Loved the series! Please write more. (I'll say Makeda's story one more time.) Good luck with school, and if you get this published, you must let us know.
I've followed the story from the first day it was posted and have fallen in love with your characters. I really liked the ending but felt that it was rushed and not as detailed as previous chapters.
Your writing allows us,the readers, to become part of your story and care for your characters. With that said, I feel that an epilogue is needed to tie off all the loose ends. Please post a final chapter so all of your devoted fans can be sure everyone does live happily-ever-after.
please do a follow up story as i think there is a lot more you can do with this story line. I think it's one of the best stories I have read on this site. have you thought of trying to get it published as a short story as I think you have a lot of talent for writing.
This was a great story! I would love to read one with Makeda and Cadifor! I can't wait to read whatever you write next!
Thanks for a great story ... I looked forward to each chapter ... please consider follow-ups when you can ... regards
You were able to leave plenty of room for this story to develop even more than what it already has. I can only hope that you choose to do so, becaue this has been one incredible read. I cant wait to see whats to come nest.
The entire series is fit for a book. It was a treat to read and i'm glad i found it after all parts had been published since i couldn't stop reading it. Please keep writing you have a talent
i was looking for something like this to read and finally someone decided to write it... THANK YOU SOO MUCH!! it only took me 3 days to read all 26 chapters but i would really love to read about the "whittens" and how they turned out.. cant wait to read more like this really enjoyed it
Please write more on this story! She's not had her litter yet and they never did enjoy that jacuzzi in his room!!! I've read all 26 chapters in one day! Absolutely loved them! You should try to get it published. I wish you all the best luck if you try to, hell, i'll buy a copy!!!
loved your story.. I hope I see you published!! You could be an amazing wrter but it takes a lot of work.. That's all writers do once they get a foot in the door... but have fun! I hope to find your story in the bookstores. *winks* lol. love it love.. and I would love to hear about the wittens too as others named them. lol
I stopped looking at this site for awhile because the majority of the stories were just like "Wham, bam, thank you ma'am." No me gusta. When I came about Leader of the Pack, I was floored. I stayed up LATE (5AM) to read them. You are an amazing writer. I believe this story can go on the shelves. I would definitely recommend this to friends (who were ok reading this stuff). It was weird how you pulled me in, though. First, Cullen's name is the last name of the main character in Twilight, Edward. Then Liam is the human name of Angel in Buffy the Vampire Slayer. THEN, Angel speaks gaelic so I was like "OMG!" But overall, you should continue. Especially, since she hasn't given birth, yet. Good luck, even though I don't think you'll need it.
This has been one of my favorite stories I've ever read on Lit! I sat for hours on end over the past two days and read all the way through and I have to say I'm really sad to see it end. It was a fantastic story and I can't wait for book 2.
I have been reading this story every day over the last week. I purpously drug it out only reading a few chapters a day so that it would last longer! The fact that this is a story, with real character development and not just the normal suck/fuck stories you find on lit really impressed me. I absolutly loved the characters and anxiously await your next forray into the lives of the lycans.
Thanks for writing this!!
Oh my gosh, this was fantastic!!!! I started reading it and couldn't stop! I stayed up all night, eyes burning, couldn't wait to see what happened. This was a really refreshing find on this site; a great storyline with great sex doesn't happen often, thanks for the sleepless night :)
I spent the last few days devouring all of this impressive story. I applaud you, your writing, your imagination and your gift. This was truly remarkable. My only sadness is that it has ended. It has delighted my weekend and captivated my heart. Congratulations and very well done...
this was beautifully done. far surpasses anything i've read in terms of depth of feeling and hot sex.
i do have some suggestions for research around what feel like some of the less developed or sure parts, if that would be helpful. (my background is in lit & i'm now back in grad school focusing on sexuality studies).
i grew up on welsh-influenced 'fantasy' (Susan Cooper, Lloyd Alexander, etc.); this feels like the grown-up version & a continuation, or the next step. marion zimmer bradley's work also comes to mind -- a bridge between the children's literature & your work, it feels like.
would absolutely love to see this published. oh! there's a private feedback form. i'll try to drop you a line.
so glad i found this! thanks for your work. hope school went well. best of luck.
IT WAS FANTASTIC! Now I don't normally leave comments, but this one required a comment. This story had me hot for hours. My internet stopped working right in the middle and all I could think about was finishing it. I really want to hear more. This is a story I could read over and over again for days. So please write more and I'll keep my eyes out for more of your stuff.
loved the story: read all the chapters in succession over a day and a night (kind of obsessive).
i'm really glad you're looking into publishing this because i think you really built a compelling storyline and mapped an intriguing world.
remember to let us know the amazon link when it's picked up.
some chapters back your ans asked to flag comments and questions on plot issues. i have one main one: when was aislinn changed into a ware cat? it seems it happened when she was captured by rafe just before the battle (in the limo ride to the reservation kara comments on that) but before that there are a number of points where it seems that rafe has done a partial change or "preparation". i remember not only the premonitions but also catlike screams during sex, purring and some reflections by cullen.
i imagine you fixed this up in the edited version an wondered how you decided to represent it.
best of luck & thanks for sharing!
I just read all 26 chapters and was completely blown away. If this is the "unedited" version then I can only imagine what the edited version looks like!
The only thing you never went back to was Cullen's thoughts about making Keith the Alpha. Does anything ever come of that?
Anyways... great job! I will definitely be checking out your other stories!
I loved this story and would love to read your follow up stories. Are you still planning on writing them? I hope so.
You story was the best I have read so far! I can't wait to read the follow ups to this story. I couldn't stop reading this story until I completed all 26 chapters and you left me wanting more! Cullon is a wonderful character. Every woman wants a man like him. Possessive, powerful, controling, protective, and yet he still is respectful, loving, and gentle with his woman. You created a beautiful man!!!
Your story was a work of genius, and I enjoyed every moment of it =) You writing ability is a gift and would love to see you continue this story. Thanks for the pleasure.
I hope you do a little more on these caricatures I love them so much it would be nice to know about there babies and if the get Jenna. PLEASE!! PLEASE!! do more that's all I can say other then I LOVE IT ALL!!! Thank you!!
I absolutly love it when i find these few amazing stories that compell me to read all 20+ chapters in one sitting...or at least attpempt to I'll admit i feel asleep with my laptop in bed reading at 5 in the morning =) I would love to read more and more of this story were ever you take it. This one is certainly goin to my favorites.
Hi,
I loved your Story. I simply couln't stop reading it - kept telling myself "just one more chapter, then I'll be of to bed". I finally made it to bed at 7.30 this morning!
Please don't stop writing. I sincerely hope that you will find interested publishers - you well deserve it!
Wow. Just wow. You are amazing. I wish I'd found this story as you were still writing it. The anticipation would have been killer, but maybe I would have gotten to bed before 3 AM the last four days. I'm looking forward to reading more from you. I know from experience that writing for Literotica isn't as easy as one might think, but you are a master.
Thank you for a wonderful story.
wow This Was an amazing story. I stayed up all night because it was to good to walk away from. i tried to go to sleep three times and couldm't because i kept thinking about the story. It was hot. The plot was well thought out. it had lots of twists and turns. This story is the reason i joined literotica. So thanks
Undoubtedly one of the best stories I've read on here, I've just spent the last8 hours or so reading the entire story, and loved every minute of it. You just became one of my favorite authors and I will definitely be keeping an eye on you. Also, thanks for stirring up my creative juices, I have ideas going round my head now... :D
that was a great read...I'm sad the story is finished...you really should write more about this world...i feel sad everytime i think its over...great story seriously...i couldn't stop reading it...but i made myself go slower near the end as i knew it would be ending soon...are you going to get this published? I hope you do...can u also make a facebook page too so us non-my spacers can keep upto date with whats going on with your writing...and thank you for taking the time to write for us....life sometimes does make it harder....good luck with everything your doing....
I just found out through your myspace link!!! Congrats on getting published....going to buy it now!!! CONGRATS AND THANK YOU
i loved the story...
Need to work on grammer but excellent nonetheless
waiting for the next series!
genius!!!!!!!!!!
wow such a grat story i codent take my self awy fom i felt like was apart of the story keepgoing your grat storyteller huggs
With the advent of the next book in the story, I decided to re-read the first, glad I did.
man! that was long and awsome cant wait for your latest book or novel you have written. love it man love it
keep writing plz this story is to good i want to hre so much
Oh my, I was totally surprised when i started reading this novel! ( I say novel!!) I was glued to the screen, i stayed up until the wee hours of the monring and still couldnt finish and have been reading over the last couple of days. Wonderful, if this was a book, i would have bought it and been happy spending the money on it. A great plot with just enough tantalising scenes - but not too much that it became sordid. Kudos to you, Im going to read the rest of your stuff now!
You are very talented. I thoroughly enjoyed this story. I think it's good enough to get published.
story...i was so happy to see you had it published...i bought it this friday...now i can take it with me no matter where i go...its a great story and i hope you publish the rest when finished....keep up the great work!
I loved the entire story, it would be better than most of the books i tend to buy and read. I just felt i couldnt get enough of the story you should really think about publishing your work. it was great
Best of luck in the future with writing you have real talent
The last two days I've been reading non stop! This was an amazing story! I heart it! But I kinda want to read more about Cullen (I have a new found love for that name lol) and Aislinn!
loved the story, hope that it dosent stop there, ill be waiting for the continuation of the story.
dude , you wrote all of this for free , i am glad you wrote this E-book i was excited (in all senses of the word) all the way through , it took me 5 straight days to get all the way through, maybe if it is all possible you can do the author thing and sell some of your works
Holy shittttt!!!! I can't wait to see an epilogue! This is one of the better E-novels I've read in a long time, and hopefully you write more of this world, especially with the 'wittens' in it! I was so excited (in all senses of the word) I couldn't put it down and read it for 2 days straight!
Can't wait for more!
anal_angel
I wanted to read the whole story before I left a comment. I have read a few stories on the site, but this one was worth looking for. Keep up the good word and keep on writting.
Oh great master and weaver of words
I bow before the greatness that is your mind and imagination
I humbly prostrate myself on the strength of your prose
I'm unfit to even hear the great and wonderous murmurings that filter out from the outer recesses of your great mind
I am in constant awe of the way light, sounds and music seem
to practically leap off of every page of your writings
I bow before you oh great one and give thanks that you are generous in spirit enough to share these great and wonderous
works with the likes of myself and those like me
YOU (YOUR STORY) OUGHTA BE IN PICTURES
i def cant wait to hear more. i couldnt stop reading. yuh truely have an amazing talent. =] thank you for the amazing chance to get to know and love such a qonderful story.
Read through it all in two days. What an awesome piece of work. Really impressive. I admire secretme's dedication.
You made me HATE you towards the beginning of this story with all of Cullen's sex with people that weren't Aislinn... seriously I was PISSED. But i scanned through it and finally got to the part where Cullen was only having "relations" (hahaha)with Aislinn and I LOVED IT!!!!!!!!!!! LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!!!!!!!
I have loved your story the whole way through. It has kept me up reading for hours when I should have gone to sleep! I would thoroughly enjoy it if you would finish up with Cullen and Aislinn before moving on to Cadifor and Makeda. We need to hear the end of their story first!!!!
absolutely the most amazing story!! I loved every chapter that was written!!I can't wait for the wittens to be born.. A epilogue is definetly needed!!
This was a great story. Don't worry about things people don't like.. write to please yourself, write the story you are seeing in your mind.
Love the story, and will definitely be checking around to find stuff you have published!
Loved the story, and thanks for sharing it with us!
I loved your story.
It took me three nights to read it and by god im glad i stayed up to read it.
I decided to come back and read this afternoon becoming addicted last year and it gets better each time you go back!! Awesome work and can't wait for you to finish the rest.
write more about this world....i liked it a lot (bad grammar and all)! i started reading it in the morning and continued through to the night unitl i finished all 26 chapters....it's like i'm reading a novel written by shannon drake, just about werewolves and not vampires...lol...keep on writing!
So loved this read & hope to see more, should be published for all to have a copy! I'd definitely buy copies! :-) Thanks so much for a fantastic read.
Cheers.
I loved this story. I was so addicted and came back for more and more! I agree with some of the others, write about the kids! Such an interesting world and a great plot!
Where is the rest???!!!! MORE!!! As Aislinn says, "Please Cullen."
The characters were great and the sex yummy. I really enjoyed it and wish you every happiness and much more writing to come.
I can't believe that I've just read an entire novel on my phone, possibly costing me a small fortune charging it (totally worth it). I just couldn't stop reading it. If your actually book is better I can't wait to get it & the others. I hope you start procrastinating again so that you write another story, earning yourself money for doing something you enjoy doing & so that I can be glued to my phone or laptop (hopefully) once again. You have a gift please continue to share it. Thank you xxx =)
I thoroughly enjoyed this novel.
I did something I never do...read two novels at once! And I have to say yours got done first...that is saying ALOT since I had just started the other one...I had waited for the fifth Vampire Academy novel to come out ALL YEAR and just got it last week and started it...then I was reading on here one night and happened upon this. I'm only 100 pages into the other book and done with yours! Anyone else who has waited for a follow-up to a favorite book for so long, never reads more than one book at a time and reads non-stop until they are done with the book they're reading knows what it took to distract me from it!
Your great writing gave me incentive to finish this first! :)
Thanks for the time you spent on it and good luck getting it published. It certainly is a book I'd buy and have already recommended to people. You are so talented! Keep writing for us! Can't wait to see if you got around to any of the follow-up stories.
I certainly hope you have or will do the epilogue about their litter! And I'd love to hear the other stories left untold too!
THANKS SO MUCH!
I thought the novel excellent reading. If you do indeed look to enhance it and publish it I would love to know and would definately purchase it. The story was captivating and you allowed your characters to take on a life of their own. A little proof reading and you have a sure thing going.
story can't wait to see what else you have written. I am glad that you developed a real plot and kept things moving nicely!
I followed it when you originally wrote it and just reread the thing from end to end.
please ohh please get it proof read and repost for future readers.
I love your work but the words in the wrong context jerk the mind to a halt like hitting a wall. Just as one example litter has two t's not one. A liter is a measurement of liquids so it is confusing.
thanks for writing
it's taken me 3 nights to get through but I loved every bit of it - thank you for sharing your story
You were so right about your grammar, but other than that, it is a great story. If you could tell us how to say the Gaelic words, I think it would flow better. Looking forward to reading the rest.
was disgusting. yyakk... (I am ready to vomit) - it was just a group sex and nothing more.