by oggbashan
All of the writer's stated goals have been met in this masterpiece of... Whatever it is it's a masterpiece, i'm sure of it.
No-one comes close to this stinker when it comes to irrelevant info, disturbing personal notes, and boredom. It's unsexy, tedious, and dreadful!
I read this long ago and far away, before pubic, erm, public comments, but I remember I felt paralyzed by the verbiage and untold repetitiosness. This bloke needs a life.
Perdita (winking smilie here)
Loved it!!! Bless your heart, it was a delight! I was laughing so much I had to send my husband a link to the story, as he was wondering why I was giggling so insanely on an erotica site. Life is good, good, GOOD!!!!!!
The run on sentences, the endless repetition, tales out of nowhere appearing for reasons unfathomable, parentheses nesting, mating, and reproducing at a dizzying pace...
Just too perfectly done. Reminds me of Weird Al's Albuquerque for absolute absurdity (Hope that's a compliment to you (It's a compliment from me for sure))
Hillarious!
Not sure what it's a masterpiece of, but a masterpiece nonetheless!
What I find truly intriguing is how much it reminds me of the output of one of Lit's more prolific writers. But this came first.
Never have I ever seen/read so many l o n g sentences!
This story reminds me of what literacy meant in my youth. We were taught to write and read, scan and digest, complex sentences, to imaginatively use allusion and wordplay and to create something that entertains - in essence, to render the fluent spoken language in narrative writing. The educated were exclusive. Only when we entered work were we required to meet the needs of the less literate. No sentence more than 8 words, no word more than 6 letters, and then only common words.
Not all commercial style guides are quite as restrictive as the Red Tops, but commercial writing is targeted to sell to those whose 'lips move when they read', as that makes it accessible across all sectors of the reading market. Sometimes I'm left with the feeling of moving forward staccato fashion, small bite by small bite.
What fun we had reading our essays to one another.