All Comments on 'From Afar'

you just wrote the new snipers mantra. Chilling and powerful. A friend of mine was in the aussie army in afghanistan and had a heap of sniper footage that makes your stomache churn at times. This he would enjoy sadistically.

Invisible surgeon

Cutting strings clean

Leaving a mess

This is in my opinion the strongest stanza. May I suggest leaving out the final stanza, as has often been pointed out to me that final stanza was alluded to in the whole piece.

Maybe finish it with

I can end you.

You are mine

as always though like your stuff a lot.

....fast becoming one of my "to look for" poets. The chill sets in slowly until icy realisation sets in. Well done.

glad there were fresh eyes to see and recommend this. All the rounds.

Wakin' Down you are Terrific & Versatile !!

you can do this with about half the words, and I would recommend removal of some. Do you need l2,l3 for example

like these lines

A finger from a mile

Needle from a hilltop

Spear from a shade

don't know how appropriate that is, but 5, I'll save the crosshairs for later

part of this in a thread, an unusual pattern, very effective