All Comments on 'On Deathbeds Door'

Not bad for a first time out, I guess there's nothing you can't write. Congrad's

An avid fan

I think you may have mixed metaphors here

You do have such wonderful short fantasies running around in your mind.

It was fun, thank you.

but considering my own little tries at poetry, I'm not the best critic.

Cute read there DG. :D I chuckled, snickered, and smirked. :D

~~ Red. :)

I'll say three things: first: continue to experiment and don't feel intimidated. I don't know how strongly you feel about writing poems. I am not going into the big "POETRY" thing, but maybe you don't even have to make any big decision? Just play with it. I for what its worth will be interested to see what you do and will give you my honest opinion (kindly, I promise).

Second, regarding the poem itself. Other than the rhyming, it reads mostly as an embryonic story. It's ok, but I was wondering if you made it clear in your mind - why a poem?

But I liked the humor; the surprise and the shift in the pov. Especially humor is sorely needed in this mostly overly self indulgent and overly serious section. So, why not more?

Three: doing poetry and doing fiction DO NOT contradict each other...

I know it when I respond too quickly. You have to wait a bit, like letting a cooking dish simmer a bit.

On a second thought it felt like a folk song with a wink (and a moral). I liked it.

A sad beginning, but a funny ending. :)

It's been done...

and their mate awaits the doomsday. TK U MLJ LV NV

DGH, you made me laugh with this twisted rhyme of twisted tail.

I usually have to kill somebody in my stories to get a happy ending.

and all with the relatives. TK U MLJ LV NV

for all of us. TK U MLJ LV NV