All Comments on 'A Short Story'

A good take on how marriages really are - how things get blown up , how we take out the days frustrations on the one person who is (or should be) in our corner daily.

Very good.

I like this story. Both spouses having a bad day, and take their anger out on each other. A very lovely story.

Thank God and Web_Spinner for realism and happy endings.

I have been here a few times.

And it looks like you have too!

Thanks for writing!

Anyone who was married for thirty-one years as I was knows this story or all of its brother and sister variations. It is good to be reminded a little about real life every once in a while. Thanks.

It happens and we are lucky that this not translate into violence or a third party does not intervene....

have I mostly managed to avoid the events depicted in your excellent story. My wife and I have been married for 32 years; we've learned to walk away when tempers start to flare.

Better than 20 years ago, my wife and I both had bad days and started out just like your couple. My grandmother, who was living with us at the time, advised both of us to think before we spoke. She said, "Once you say it, you can't take it back. It's out there for all time."

Sound advice.

Your story rings with truth and realism. Thank you for the insight and the warning.

Well done and thanks for your hard work.

is exactly that, a story about a loving wife, and in this case husband too. No adultery, swapping, or suchlike, just two people who had bad days and saw what they had before they lost it. Good work :)

...like were you spying on me and the honey last week??? This depicts the histrionics performed by our household all too frequently. But I'm not sure i could ever be like woody and bite my tongue. Sometimes it's good to go through the theatrics,I think.

Had a few times like this, not as bad and neither of us have actually left the house. But still these things DO happen. one of the good things, if there are ever good things that comes out of these times is the make up sex/lovemaking afterwards.

Thank you for writing this story Webspinner.

Regards

AW

Been there, done that. Married 39 years! It's so nice to see a true, "loving partners" story in this section once in a while. Thanks for writing.

Thanks.

is probably the most stressful thing two people can enter into. If you do not have the type of love these two displayed, then you are probably in trouble. I know, I have 45 years of experience with lots of bumps in the road. With lots of understanding and love (both sides) we are where we are today. This was a nice, short fulfilling story. Thanks for your time and effort to entertain us.

I've now read several stories by WebSpinner. I like the basic plots, but I hate the style of writing. In short, where's the dialogue? We read about husband's thoughts and descriptions, but they're not enough to really flesh out the story or the characters.

For example, hubby describes something wife said to make him snap. Okay, what the hell did she say? Then what incredibly hurtful thing did he say to make her, in turn, snap back?

Because there's no dialogue--just descriptive hints about the nature of the dialogue--we're all left guessing.

As such, one can't help but wonder whether dialogue here would have made the story far more satisfying. If we actually knew what she said to set him off, then perhaps it increases the tension in the story as to why he got so angry. If we'd known what he said to make her snap, then we'd wonder until the end whether she'd forgive his statements.

Without the dialogue, though, the story basically reads like this: "I had a really bad day. Everything was going wrong. Then I came home and my wonderful wife was bitchy, too. She finally said something that really pissed me off. Then I said something that pissed her off more. Then she went to her room. I felt bad. Then she stormed past me, suitcase in hand. I begged her to stay. She ignored me. She left, and I was really, really sad now. I went out to the swing in the back yard and thought about how sad I was. Then she came back, we kissed, and all was well again. The End."

Thus, while the author clearly has writing talent and plots well, I believe he would be well served by fleshing out his basic plots with descriptions and dialogues. As it is, the story reads more like an outline for a story, and I think his abilities are far better than the few tales I've read indicate.

...this guy can ride herd on dialogue when appropriate. The point in this story made just fine without dialogue.

As I read this story, which is well managed and edited, it seemed as if I were reading a newspaper article. it's just a little cut and dried for my tastes in erotica.

Thanks for the read.

His message was not lost on me and I have had nearly forty-seven years of marriage to draw from. Five Stars fom me.

OUTSTANDING! Everyone should be required to read this during prenuptual sessions. This is real life. Think before you speak. Give yourself time to cool off if you are angry prior to saying something you will regret. Look at what you have before running away or giving in to the temptations of straying. I almost threw it all away before I realized how good my life really is!

Married for almost 30 years and you've hit it right on the button. Both partners get pissed occasionally but if they have any love for thier spouse they cool down, put thier pride away and realize that they need and want the other more than they need or want to fight. Great story!

Rehnquist commented on the lack of dialogue in several of the stories he read. If I was an author on Lit, which I just don't have the talent to be ... I would pay attention to his advice.

He himself is an excellent author and when I come across his comments on other authors' stories, they are always well-mannered and intended to help and encourage.

Afterall it's just a dumb hokey story this webspinner bastard wrote .(that I'm giving 5 stars to.)

I read Rehnquist's comment about dialog and I couldn't disagree more. Rehnquist to be sure is a good author and I have liked most of his stories. But you can't force the same style into every story.

If you want to say that a particular story needs more dialog or development or whatever that's fine. But it's not appropriate to make a blanket statement about all stories. Especially when that analysis doesn't even apply here.

This short story was about thoughts and actions. It was to give us a brief look into their though process during their argument. In depth dialog would have changed the whole tone of the story and may have made it less effective.

Rehnquist writes long, sometimes very long and detailed stories. That is his formula for all of his stories and it works pretty well for him. But not here. In some ways this story show more creativity than some of Lits other authors do. This story is also different from most of Web Spinners stories. If they were all like this we probably wouldn't think he was much of the author. But this story is a nice change of pace.

As for dialog in some of the other authors stories, Rehnquist got it wrong there as well.

The other stories have just enough dialog for the authors story telling style to make them really good. I wonder if the Web_Spinner's handle says something about his style? He tells a story. Whenever there is interaction between characters, there is dialog and it's good.

So while I respect Rehnquist as an author, his comments here are wrong. I would put Powerball and Irish Eyes up against anything on this site.

And they would fare very well.

If this author disappoints me its because he has stopped writing great stories.

Thanks for you contributions and we would all appreciate it if you started writing again. I bet I'm not the only one to read some of your stories more than once.

rehnquist feels like the overlord of LW because a legion of deranged and deluded sycophants voted his redundant stories to the top of the NY Times bestsellers list, or the loving wife hall of fame, one or the other. good work author.

Your comments are always insightful and to the point. This site need someone like you.

Thank you. Great read, good point.

it's laughable.....

Rehnquist's style is nearly unreadable

for me, even if I give it a try, a story coming from him is a waste of time

A loving marriage.

What the fuck is that?

one word shall suffice----COMMUNICATION TK U MLJ LV NV

Quick - clean - real -

We all have those days that just suck beyond simple words - We ALL have to remember why we do any of what we do - it is to maintain a good life for ourselves and those we love most -

Leave the shit behind when you walk up to the reason you live and say hello -

that could just as easily fit in ther romance section.

Lovely!

Short, but very sweet :)

I dislike it when a writer tries to use the present tense while telling the story. And this story demonstrates the difficulty: it is told partially in the past tense, and then shifts into present tense for no really good reason. Just a thought...

Just not sure why is is in LW rather than romance....

thank you, this atrue love story, people make mistakes, apologize, forgive each other, pick up the pieces and go on.

FINALLY an author that writes reality... This is what you do in a marriage. Wow, awesome, I saved it, and my wife loved it too. sat down and had a tear for a while this story touch both of us. How often do couples have a bad day? Life is never perfect take the bad with the good. Remembering your vows, what they mean each word.

I really liked the change of tense in the last paragraph. It was particularly poignant and moving. Excellent story.

and usually does more often than not, especially when ego and conscience conflict, TK U MLJ LV NV

Just an hour in the life of a loving couple, who realize one little argument does not destroy a lifetime of love. Lesson learned.

Been there, done that. It was so easy to let the slings and arrows from the outside world pollute the atmosphere of the home and the marriage; alas. Good story.

Thanks for writing.

Bull Shit Story--A story for a cuck.

or kids going steady.. TK U MLJ LV NV

Isn't it always the case that we get caught up in our own misery and take it out on the ones we love? I think we've all been there.

Only a person who has been in a relationship worth saving can understand this. Excellent short story.

SHORT and SWEET this was actually a pretty good story and more to the fact of actuality. ya did good with this. Because this is something that could really happen. Sounds like something that happened to you. I am glad that he two people involved in this grew up and realized what happened and made up. Again GOOD JOB.

Thanks for the offering.

And highly unlikely. The reality? She drove to her parents. They sympathized with their little girl, Daddy hired her an attorney and 6 months later the divorce was done.

Are you crazy? This tale is more realistic than most. Read it again.

Two human beings with typical human weaknesses. Fortunately, neither one did anything too selfish or stupid before they came to their senses.

It's been years but the return of such a talent would be nice.

This reads like an 8th grade student wrote it. Sorry. 3 stars.

Sweet story

The comments have devloved into a squable among authors.

Guys! "No use arguing aboutpreferances."

Mate this story killed me awful awful awful. But at least you have other stories where I'm very happy read

***

Thank you for this story. Brings up some memories.

What a great little story about the importance of not letting the little things get in the way of your love and marriage! It's letting the little things build up that destroys most marriages, due to the lack of communication that is usually behind the little things that bug us about each other. Of course the ability to ignore the little things all together and be patient with each other is an even better solution!

It happened to me and my wife, though we split for a week. That was 45 years ago.

Life is good to us.

No deep character development needed -- just actions, reactions, and emotions.

Great Job, thanks!

A very touching relief tale in such a cynical world. Please continue.

Thanks for the offering.

... hard to beat - make-up sex!

..or even to 20 before saying anything to your loving partner when you angry and upset.....you might regret it.

shame unable to double stars. slap hapy papy #9

Too much crying.#2D

You have to wonder if anon of 2-23 has lost anything more important than a set of keys with that comment.This storyline would almost be as bad as if one or the other had died.

..in a story shorter than one page to build high enough and then have resolution so as to merit 5 stars.

This story did the impossible.

Paul in Oklahoma

Short, succinct, and perfect. Thank you.

My wife and I were married for 44yrs. We had several of these kind of misunderstandings in our marriage. Her parents lived in the same town so after the cool off and many phone calls we would meld back into each others arms and use our mistakes as life lessons. Thanks so much for the truth and a great short story. Everything was there for a complete story of how real life goes on.

Very nice and shockingly short story.

However it doesn't deal with either party cheating!

In the order I read them, this is one of the last of your stories. I'm not too much a fan of the category. I was prepared not to like it and found myself liking it. When I read the story I was surprised. Very much like what happens in life, and these idiots got lucky. Fortunately they realized it, if almost too late. So like real life.

Watching your marriage slipping away and not doing enough to stop it. Years of regret follow and never goes away. These two were lucky.

... Done!

Can't add anything else, just 26thNC. Signed: BTW

Never had bad days before

What happened then

One that ended so much better than it started.

Lovely and very realistic. Thank you.

That was short.

If you want to add some humor to it, just have her turn the car around and race back to apologize, only to accidentally run him over on the lawn in her haste, Leslie Nielsen style. Dunno about anyone else, but I'd laugh.

Sweet little story.

after 43 years to gather we had that happen a time or too

Yes, sometimes life gets in the way and we react without thinking how it will be received. Fortunately your couple realized it before it was fatal.

but for the rush to have 'make-up' sex.

It would have been more believable if they had talked about what went wrong first then slipped off to the bedroom.

Evah_Rheddy

It's nice to read a "normal" story about a normal couple.

Well, in 32 years of marriage, I can't say it never happened to me. Make-up sex heals many wounds.

quick and dirty, been there done that arguments over who knows what no understanding, leave for a weak or so then she says come back home and I did, it happens all over again maybe three times. I still don't understand. The marriage lasted 40m years before she passed and it's hard living without her, what can say? True story real life. You fight you makeup you get on with your life. We are emotional creatures. This story was more real than anyone would think. Keep writin'

Good short and to the point Loving Wife story.

Damn

Actually love wins. How often does that happen?

Sweet story.

I think about all the things I have said in anger; even worse, my angry thoughts that were never uttered. Love conquers all.

I will be reading more of your work. 5 happy stars.

And they raised unicorns with rainbows coming out of their butts!

Just Don't Tell Me

That some twit commented that this was in the wrong category. The definition goes "...& more." This was written by someone who has to have lived that day themselves at least once. *****'s Signed: BTW

Glad she is a true LW, who did NOT cheat!!!

This is definitely the nicest story I have found On Literotica! Well done!

How can anyone, even the whorewife lovers, not appreciate this story?

Great short story, really refreshing

Enjoyed this very much. What I wouldn't give to be the one who ALWAYS thinks before he speaks. Glad they're together.

So...

Love in the, perforce, once-great US of depraved A is poignant as long as it's all carnal.

Notice how the man, immediately upon recognizing a couple of hints of reconciliation from "his" woman, picked her up & instantly hurried off up to the fuckroom/bedroom, sans even considering how much more beneficial it would be were they to commence the revived marriage by sharing a tender conversation of 2 souls hitherto torn asunder over trivialities, some precious moments of sensible discussions of the whys & hows of meriting a reconciliation, of why the duet had a 'much ado over naught' experience... of realizing how much more the "Power of Words" must take precedence over the "Power of the Flesh" in order for a lengthy indomitable sort of conjugally blissful living to ensue.

Ergo, the contemporary American is all flesh, no spirit. Live and hunt by the flesh, and nowadays they die by the flesh, poor silly things, lighting up the charts on worldometer.com's Covid section via their oh so "americana", read depraved and dystopic, lives.

One day'll dawn when there'll be these stories, women-centric sort, bereft of the immediacy of placing men's needs above all else; but of course Literotica would rather see its twilight time before a bastion of female narratives takes over.

The outline looks promising, when are you going to write the story?

Has anybody out there had a day (or days) like that?? My wife and I have had a couple, but luckily, neither one of us left the house. After an hour or so, we each looked at each other, laughed, and had a darn enjoyable evening.

As the saying goes, "stuff happens".

I questioned for a moment why this story is in the Loving Wives category. But, who cares? It's a wonderful, heartwarming story.

That being said, it's an easy Red H if posted in the Romance category. Regardless, full marks from me.

Definitely a five star rating 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟